第56章

Thesyndichadtoldmethatthethreeyoungladiesbelongedtorespectablefamilies，butwerenotrich。IpuzzledmyheadtothinkofsomeusefulpresentImightmakethemwithoutoffendingthem，andatlastIhitonaplanofthemostridiculousnature，asthereaderwillsee。Iwenttoajewellerandtoldhimtomakemethreegoldenballs，eachoftwoouncesinweight。

AtnoonIwenttoM。deVoltaire’s。Hewasnottobeseen，butMadameDenisconsoledmeforhisabsence。Shehadwit，learningwithoutpretension，taste，andagreathatredfortheKingofPrussia，whomshecalledavillain。Sheaskedaboutmybeautifulhousekeeper，andcongratulatedmeonhavingmarriedhertoarespectableman。AlthoughIfeelnowthatshewasquiteright，Iwasfarfromthinkingsothen；theimpressionwastoofreshonmymind。

MadameDenisbeggedmetotellherhowIhadescapedfromTheLeads，butasthestorywasratheralongoneIpromisedtosatisfyheranothertime。

M。deVoltairedidnotdinewithus；heappeared，however，atfiveo’clock，holdingaletterinhishand。

"Doyouknow，"saidhe，"theMarquisAlbergatiCapacelli，senatorofBologna，andCountParadisi？"

"IdonotknowParadisi，butIknowAlbergatibysightandbyreputation；heisnotasenator，butoneoftheForty，whoatBolognaareFifty。"

"Dearme！Thatseemsratherariddle！"

"Doyouknowhim？"

"No，buthehassentmeGoldoni’s’Theatre，’thetranslationofmyTancred，andsomeBolognasausages，andhesayshewillcomeandseeme。"

"Hewillnotcome；heisnotsuchafool。"

"Howafool？Wouldtherebeanythingfoolishincomingtoseeme？"

"Certainlynot，asfarasyouareconcerned；butverymuchsofarhisownsake。"

"Wouldyoumindtellingmewhy？"

"Heknowswhathewouldlose；forheenjoystheideayouseemtohaveofhim，andifhecameyouwouldseehisnothingness，andgood—byetotheillusion。Heisaworthymanwithsixthousandsequinsayear，andacrazeforthetheatre。Heisagoodactorenough，andhaswrittenseveralcomediesinprose，buttheyarefitneitherforthestudynorthestage。"

"Youcertainlygivehimacoatwhichdoesnotmakehimlookanybigger。"

"Iassureyouitisnotquitesmallenough。"

"ButtellmehowhecanbelongtotheFortyandtheFifty？"

"JustasatBalenoonisateleven。"

"Iunderstand；justasyourCouncilofTeniscomposedofseventeenmembers。"

"Exactly；butthecursedFortyofBolognaaremenofanotherkind。"

"Whycursed？"

"Becausetheyarenotsubjecttothefisc，andarethusenabledtocommitwhatevercrimestheylikewithperfectimpunity；alltheyhavegottodoistoliveoutsidethestatebordersontheirrevenues。"

"Thatisablessing，andnotacurse；butletmereturntooursubject。IsupposetheMarquisAlbergatiisamanofletters？"

"Hewriteswellenough，butheisfondofthesoundofhisownvoice，hisstyleisprolix，andIdon’tthinkhehasmuchbrains。"

"Heisanactor，Ithinkyousaid？"

"Yes，andaverygoodone，aboveall，whenheplaysthelover’spartinoneofhisownplays。"

"Isheahandsomeman？"

"Yes，onthestage，butnotelsewhere；hisfacelacksexpression。"

"Buthisplaysgivesatisfaction？"

"Nottopersonswhounderstandplaywriting；theywouldbehissediftheywereintelligible。"

"AndwhatdoyouthinkofGoldoni？"

"Ihavethehighestopinionofhim。GoldoniistheItalianMoliere。"

"WhydoeshecallhimselfpoettotheDukeofParma？"

"Nodoubttoprovethatawitaswellasafoolhashisweakpoints；

inallprobabilitythedukeknowsnothingaboutit。Healsocallshimselfabarrister，thoughheissuchonlyinhisownimagination。

Goldoniisagoodplaywriter，andnothingmore。EverybodyinVeniceknowsmeforhisfriend，andIcanthereforespeakofhimwithauthority。Hedoesnotshineinsociety，andinspiteofthefinesatireofhisworksheisamanofanextremelygentledisposition。"

"SoIhavebeentold。Heispoor，andwantstoleaveVenice。Themanagersofthetheatreswheretheyplayhispieceswillnotlikethat。"

"Peopletalkedaboutgettinghimapension，buttheprojecthasbeenrelegatedtotheGreekKalends，astheysaidthatifhehadapensionhewouldwritenomore。"

"CumaerefusedtogiveapensiontoHomer，forfearthatalltheblindmenwouldaskforapension。"

Wespentapleasantday，andhethankedmeheartilyforthecopyoftheMacaronicon，whichhepromisedtoread。HeintroducedmetoaJesuithehadinhishousehold，whowascalledAdam，andheadded，aftertellingmehisname，"notthefirstAdam。"IwastoldafterwardsthatVoltaireusedtoplaybackgammonwithhim，andwhenhelosthewouldthrowthediceandtheboxathishead。IfJesuitsweretreatedlikethatalltheworldover，perhapsweshouldhavenonebutinoffensiveJesuitsatlast，butthathappytimeisstillfaroff。

IhadscarcelygottomyinnintheeveningwhenIreceivedmythreegoldenballs，andassoonasthesyndiccamewesetofftorenewourvoluptuousorgy。Onthewayhetalkedaboutmodesty，andsaid，——

"Thatfeelingwhichpreventsourshewingthosepartswhichwehavebeentaughttocoverfromourchildhood，mayoftenproceedfromvirtue，butisweakerthantheforceofeducation，asitcannotresistanattackwhentheattackingpartyknowswhatheisabout。

Ithinktheeasiestwaytovanquishmodestyistoignoreitspresence，toturnitintoridicule，tocarryitbystorm。Victoryiscertain。Thehardihoodoftheassailersubduestheassailed，whousuallyonlywishestobeconquered，andnearlyalwaysthanksyouforyourvictory。

"ClementofAlexandria，alearnedmanandaphilosopher，hasremarkedthatthemodestywhichappearssodeeplyrootedinwomen’sheartsreallygoesnofartherthantheclothestheywear，andthatwhenthesearepluckedoffnotraceofitremains。"

Wefoundthethreegirlslightlycladandsittingonalargesopha，andwesatdownoppositetothem。Pleasanttalkandathousandamorouskissesoccupiedthehalfhourjustbeforesupper，andourcombatdidnotbegintillwehadeatenadeliciousrepast，washeddownwithplentyofchampagne。

Weweresureofnotbeinginterruptedbythemaidandweputourselvesatourease，whilstourcaressesbecamemorelivelyandardent。Thesyndic，likeacarefulman，drewapacketoffineFrenchlettersfromhispocket，anddeliveredalongeulogiumonthisadmirablepreservativefromanaccidentwhichmightgiverisetoaterribleandfruitlessrepentance。Theladiesknewthem，andseemedtohavenoobjectiontotheprecaution；theylaughedheartilytoseetheshapethesearticlestookwhentheywereblownout。Butaftertheyhadamusedthemselvesthusforsometime，Isaid，"Mydeargirls，Icaremoreforyourhonourthanyourbeauty；butdonotthinkIamgoingtoshutmyselfinapieceofdeadskintoprovethatIamalive。Here，"Iadded，drawingoutthethreegoldenballs，"isasurerandlessdisagreeablewayofsecuringyoufromanyunpleasantconsequences。Afterfifteenyears’experienceIcanassureyouthatwiththesegoldenballsyoucangiveandtakewithoutrunningtheleastrisk。Forthefutureyouwillhavenoneedofthosehumiliatingsheaths。TrustinmeandacceptthislittlepresentfromaVenetianwhoadoresyou。"

"Weareverygrateful，"saidtheelderofthetwosisters，"buthowaretheseprettyballsused？"

"Theballhastobeattherearofthetempleoflove，whilsttheamorouscoupleareperformingthesacrifice。Theantipathycommunicatedtothemetalbyitsbeingsoakedforacertaintimeinanalkalinesolutionpreventsimpregnation。"

"But，"saidthecousin，"onemusttakegreatcarethattheballisnotshakenoutbythemotionbeforetheendofthesacrifice。"

"Youneedn’tbeafraidofthatifyouplaceyourselfinaproperposition。"

"Letusseehowit’sdone，"saidthesyndic，holdingacandleformetoputtheballinplace。

Thecharmingcousinhadgonetoofartoturnback；shehadtosubmittotheoperation。IplacedtheballinsuchapositionthatitcouldnotfalloutbeforeIwasin；however，itfellouttowardstheend，justaswewereseparating。ThevictimperceivedthatIhadtakenherin。However，shesaidnothing，pickeduptheball，andchallengedthetwosisterstosubmittothepleasantexperiment，towhichtheylentthemselveswiththegreatestinterest；whilethesyndic，whohadnofaithinthevirtuesofthemetal，contentedhimselfwithlookingon。Afterhalfanhour’srestIbeganagain，withoutballs，assuringthemthatIwouldbecareful，andIkeptmyword，withoutdeprivingthemofthepleasureintheslightestdegree。

Whenitwastimetopart，thesegirls，whohadformerlybeenscantilyprovidedfor，threwtheirarmsroundmyneck，overwhelmedmewithcaresses，anddeclaredhowmuchtheyowedme。ThesyndictoldthemthatIwasgoingintwodays，andsuggestedthattheyshouldmakemestayadaylongerinGeneva，andImadethissacrificejoyfully。Theworthysyndichadanengagementonthefollowingday，andIsorelyneededaholidaymyself。Hetookmebacktomyinn，thankingmealmostasheartilyashischarmingnymphs。

Afterhavingenjoyedacalmandrefreshingsleeptenhours，IfeltmyselfabletoenjoythedelightfulsocietyofM。deVoltaire。I

wenttohishouse，butIwasdisappointedinmyhopes，asitpleasedthegreatmantobeinafault—findingandsarcasticmoodthewholeday。HeknewIhadtoleaveonthemorrow。

HebeganbythankingmeattableformypresentofMerlinCoccaeus。

"Youcertainlygaveitmewithgoodintentions，"saidhe，"butIoweyounothanksforpraisingitsohighly，asyoumademelosefourhoursinreadingnonsense。"

Ifeltmyhairstandonend，butImasteredmyemotions，andtoldhimquietlyenoughthatoneday，perhaps，hewouldfindhimselfobligedtopraisethepoemmorehighlythanIhaddone。Iquotedseveralinstancesoftheinsufficiencyofafirstperusal。

"That’strue，"saidhe；"butasforyourMerlin，Iwillreadhimnomore。IhaveputhimbesideChapelain’s’Pucelle’。"

"Whichpleasesallthecritics，inspiteofitsbadversification，foritisagoodpoem，andChapelainwasarealpoetthoughhewrotebadverses。Icannotoverlookhisgenius。"

Myfreedommusthaveshockedhim，andImighthaveguesseditwhenhetoldmehehadputthe’Macaronicon’besidethe’Pucelle’。Iknewthattherewasapoemofthesametitleincirculation，whichpassedforVoltaire’s；butIalsoknewthathedisavowedit，andIthoughtthatwouldmakehimconcealthevexationmyexplanationmusthavecausedhim。Itwasnotso，however；hecontradictedmesharply，andIclosedwithhim。

"Chapelain，"saidI，"hasthemeritofhavingrenderedhissubject—matterpleasant，withoutpanderingtothetastesofhisreadersbysayingthingsshockingtomodestyandpiety。SothinksmymasterCrebillon:"

"Crebillon！Youciteaweightyauthority。ButhowismyfriendCrebillonyourmaster，mayIask？"

"HetaughtmetospeakFrenchinlessthantwoyears，andasamarkofmygratitudeItranslatedhisRadamisteintoItalianAlexandrines。

IamthefirstItalianwhohasdaredtousethismetreinourlanguage。"

"Thefirst？Ibegyourpardon，asthathonourbelongstomyfriendPierreJacquesMartelli。"

"Iamsorrytobeobligedtotellyouthatyouaremakingamistake。"

"Why，Ihavehisworks，printedatBologna，inmyroom！"

"Idon’tdenythat，IamonlytalkingaboutthemetreusedbyMartelli。Whatyouarethinkingofmustbeversesoffourteensyllables；withoutalternativemasculineandfemininerhymes。

However，IconfessthathethinkshehasimitatedtheFrenchAlexandrines，andhisprefacemademeexplodewithlaughter。Didyoureadit？"

"Readit？Ialwaysreadprefaces，andMartelliprovestherethathisverseshavethesameeffectinItalianasourAlexandrineverseshaveinFrench。"

"Exactly，that’swhat’ssoamusing。Theworthymanisquitemistaken，andIonlyaskyoutolistentowhatIhavetosayonthesubject。Yourmasculineversehasonlytwelvepoeticsyllables，andthefemininethirteen。AllMartelli’slineshavefourteensyllables，exceptthosethatfinishwithalongvowel，whichattheendofalinealwayscountsastwosyllables。YouwillobservethatthefirsthemistitchinMartellialwaysconsistsofsevensyllables，whileinFrenchitonlyhassix。YourfriendPierreJacqueswaseitherstonedeaforveryhardofhearing。"

"Thenyouhavefollowedourtheoryofversificationrigorously。"

"Justso，inspiteofthedifficulty，asnearlyallourwordsendwithashortsyllable。"

"Whatreceptionhasbeenaccordedtoyourinnovation？"

"Ithasnotbeenfoundpleasing，becausenobodyknowshowtorecitemyverses；butIhopetotriumphwhenIdeliverthemmyselfbeforeourliteraryclubs。"

"DoyourememberanyofyourversionoftheRadamiste？"

"Irememberitall。"

"Youhaveawonderfulmemory；Ishouldbegladtohearit。"

IbegantorecitethesamescenethatIhadrecitedtoCrebillontenyearsbefore，andIthoughtM。deVoltairelistenedwithpleasure。

"Itdoesn’tstrikeoneasatallharsh，"saidhe。

Thiswasthehighestpraisehewouldgiveme。InhisturnthegreatmanrecitedapassagefromTancredwhichhadnotasyetbeenpublished，andwhichwasafterwardsconsidered，andrightly，asamasterpiece。

Weshouldhavegotonverywellifwehadkepttothat，butonmyquotingalineofHoracetopraiseoneofhispieces，hesaidthatHoracewasagreatmasterwhohadgivenpreceptswhichwouldneverbeoutofdate。ThereuponIansweredthathehimselfhadviolatedoneofthem，butthathehadviolateditgrandly。

"Whichisthat？"

"Youdonotwrite，’Contentuspaucislectoribus’。"

"IfHoracehadhadtocombatthehydra—headedmonsterofsuperstition，hewouldhavewrittenasIhavewritten——foralltheworld。"

"Itseemstomethatyoumightspareyourselfthetroubleofcombatingwhatyouwillneverdestroy。"

"ThatwhichIcannotfinishotherswill，andIshallalwayshavethegloryofbeingthefirstinthefield。"

"Verygood；butsupposingyousucceedindestroyingsuperstition，whatareyougoingtoputinitsplace？"

"Ilikethat。IfIdelivertheraceofmanfromawildbeastwhichisdevouringit，amItobeaskedwhatIintendtoputinitsplace？"

"Itdoesnotdevourit；onthecontrary，itisnecessarytoitsexistence。"

"Necessarytoitsexistence！Thatisahorribleblasphemy，thefalsityofwhichwillbeseeninthefuture。Ilovethehumanrace；

Iwouldfainseemenlikemyself，freeandhappy，andsuperstitionandfreedomcannotgotogether。Wheredoyoufindanenslavedandyetahappypeople？"

"Youwish，then，toseethepeoplesovereign？"

"Godforbid！Theremustbeasovereigntogovernthemasses。"

"Inthatcaseyoumusthavesuperstition，forwithoutitthemasseswillneverobeyameremandeckedwiththenameofmonarch。"

"Iwillhavenomonarch；thewordexpressesdespotism，whichIhateasIdoslavery。"

"Whatdoyoumean，then？Ifyouwishtoputthegovernmentinthehandsofoneman，suchaman，Imaintain，willbeamonarch。"

"Iwouldhaveasovereignrulerofafreepeople，ofwhichheisthechiefbyanagreementwhichbindsthemboth，whichwouldpreventhimfrombecomingatyrant。"

"Addisonwilltellyouthatsuchasovereignisasheerimpossibility。IagreewithHobbes，oftwoevilschoosetheleast。

Anationwithoutsuperstitionwouldbeanationofphilosophers，andphilosopherswouldneverobey。Thepeoplewillonlybehappywhentheyarecrushedanddown—trodden，andboundinchains。"

"Thisishorrible；andyouareofthepeopleyourself。IfyouhavereadmyworksyoumusthaveseenhowIshewthatsuperstitionistheenemyofkings。"

"Readyourworks？Ihavereadandre—readthem，especiallyinplaceswhereIhavedifferedfromyou。Yourrulingpassionistheloveofhumanity。’Estubipeccas’。Thisblindsyou。Lovehumanity，butloveitasitis。Itisnotfittoreceivetheblessingsyouwouldlavishonit，andwhichwouldonlymakeitmorewretchedandperverse。Leavementheirdevouringmonster，itisdeartothem。

IhaveneverlaughedsoheartilyasatDonQuixoteassailedbythegalley—slaveswhomhisgenerosityhadsetfree。"

"Iamsorrythatyouhavesuchabadopinionofyourfellow—

creatures。Andbytheway，tellmewhetherthereisfreedominVenice。"

"Asmuchascanbeexpectedunderanaristocracy。OurlibertyisnotsogreatasthatwhichtheEnglishenjoy，butwearecontent。"

"EvenunderTheLeads？"

"Myimprisonmentwascertainlydespotic；butasIhadknowinglyabusedmylibertyIamsatisfiedthattheGovernmentwaswithinitsrightsinshuttingmeupwithouttheusualformalities。"

"Allthesame，youmadeyourescape。"

"Iusedmyrightsastheyhadusedtheirs。"

"Verygood！ButasfarasIcansee，nooneinVeniceisreallyfree。"

"Thatmaybe；butyoumustagreethattheessenceoffreedomconsistsinthinkingyouhaveit。"

"Ishallnotagreetothatsoeasily。YouandIseelibertyfromverydifferentpointsofview。Thearistocrats，themembersoftheGovernmenteven，arenotfreeatVenice；forexample，theycannottravelwithoutpermission。"

"True，butthatisarestrictionoftheirownmakingtopreservetheirpower。WouldyousaythataBerneseisnotfree，becauseheissubjecttothesumptuarylaws，whichhehimselfhadmade。"

"Well，well，Iwishthepeoplemadethelawseverywhere。"

Afterthislivelyanswer，heabruptlyaskedmewhatpartIcamefrom。

"FromRoche，"saidI。"IshouldhavebeenverysorrytoleaveSwitzerlandwithoutseeingthefamousHaller。InmytravelsIrenderhomagetomylearnedcontemporaries，andyoucomethelastandbest。"

"YoumusthavelikedHaller。"

"Ispentthreeofthehappiestdaysofmylifewithhim。"

"Icongratulateyou。Heisagreatmanandworthyofallhonour。"

"Ithinkasyoudo，andIamgladtohearyoudoinghimjustice；Iamsorryhewasnotsojusttowardsyou。"

"Well，youseewemaybebothofusmistaken。"

Atthisreply，thequicknessofwhichconstituteditschiefmerit，everybodypresentbegantolaughandapplaud。

Nomorewassaidofliterature，andIbecameasilentactortillM。deVoltaireretired，whenIapproachedMadameDenis，andaskedherifshehadanycommandsformeatRome。Iwenthomewellpleasedathavingcompelledthegiantofintelle