第52章

"Icannotinviteyoutomyhouse，"saidshe，"forcertainsufficientreasons；butifyouwillstayheresometimeweshallbeabletoseeeachother。ButIentreatyounottoshewmeanymarkedattentioninpublic，fortherearethosewhowillspyuponouractions，anditisnotpleasanttobetalkedabout。

Iwasquitesatisfiedwiththis，andtoldherthatIwoulddoallinmypowertopleaseher，andthatthemostpryingeyesshouldhavenothingtofixon。IfeltthatthepleasureIlookedforwardtowouldberenderedallthesweeterbyatinctureofmystery。

Ihadproclaimedmyselfasanoviceinthemimicart，andhadentreatedmylamefriendtobekindenoughtoinstructme。I

thereforewenttoherinthemorning，butshecouldonlyflatterherselfthatherswasareflectedlight，asIhadopportunitiesforpayingmycourttomycharmerinherhouse，andhowevergreathervanitymayhavebeen，shemusthavehadsomesuspicionsofthetruth。

Thiswomanwasawidow，agedbetweenthirtyandfortyyears，ofajaundicedcomplexion，andapiercingandmaliciousaspect。Inhereffortstohidetheinequalityofherlegs，shewalkedwithastiffandawkwardair；and，wishingtobethoughtawit，sheincreasedhernaturaldullnessbyaceaselessflowofsmalltalk。Ipersistedinbehavingtowardsherwithagreatairofrespect，andonedayshesaidthat，havingseenmeinthedisguiseofawaiter，shewouldnothavethoughtIwasamanofatimidnature。

"Inwhatrespectdoyouthinkmetimid？"saidI；towhichshegavemenoanswer，butIknewperfectlywellwhatshemeant。Iwastiredofmypart，andIhaddeterminedtoplayitnomorewhenwehadactedL’Ecossaise。

AllthebestpeopleatSoleurewerepresentatourfirstperformance。

Thelameladywasdelightedwiththehorrorinspiredbyheracting；

butshemightcreditagreatdealofittoherappearance。M。deChavignidrewforththetearsoftheaudience，hisactingwassaidtobebetterthanthegreatVoltaire’s。Asforme，IrememberhownearIwastofaintingwhen，inthethirdsceneofthefifthact，Lindanesaidtome，"What！You！Youdaretoloveme？"

Shepronouncedthesewordswithsuchfieryscornthatallthespectatorsapplaudedvehemently。Iwasalmostputoutofcountenance，forIthoughtIdetectedinhervoiceaninsulttomyhonour。However，Icollectedmyselfintheminute’srespitewhichtheloudapplausegaveme，andIreplied，———

"Yes；Iadoreyou！HowshouldInot？"

SopatheticallyandtenderlydidIpronouncethesewordsthatthehallrangagainwiththeapplause，andtheencoresfromfourhundredthroatsmademerepeatthewordswhich，indeed，camefrommyheart。

Inspiteofthepleasurewehadgiventotheaudience，wejudgedourselvesnotperfectinourparts，andM。deChavigniadvisedustoputoffoursecondperformanceforacoupleofdays。

"Wewillhavearehearsalto—morrowatmycountryhouse，"saidhe，"andIbegthefavourofallyourcompaniestodinnerthere。"

However，weallmadeeachothercomplimentsonouracting。MylamefriendtoldmeIhadplayedwell，butnotsowellasinthepartofwaiter，whichreallysuitedmeadmirably。Thissarcasmgotthelaughonherside，butIreturneditbytellingherthatmyperformancewasaworkofart，whileherplayingofLadyAltonwaspurenature。

M。deChavignitoldMadamethatthespectatorswerewrongtoapplaudwhensheexpressedherwonderatmylovingher，sinceshehadspokenthewordsdisdainfully；anditwasimpossiblethatLindanecouldhavedespisedMurray。Theambassadorcalledformethenextdayinhiscarriage，andwhenwereachedhiscountry—housewefoundalltheactorsassembledthere。HisexcellencyaddressedhimselfinthefirstplacetoM。————，tellinghimhethoughthisbusinesswasasgoodasdone，andthattheywouldtalkaboutitafterdinner。Wesatdowntotable，andafterwardsrehearsedthepiecewithoutanyneedoftheprompter’sassistance。

TowardseveningtheambassadortoldthecompanythathewouldexpectthemtosupperthateveningatSoleure，andeveryoneleftwiththeexceptionoftheambassador，myself，andM。————andMadame————。JustasweweregoingIhadanagreeablesurprise。

"Willyoucomewithme，"saidtheAmbassadortoM。————，"wecantalkthematteroveratourease？M。Casanovawillhavethehonourofkeepingyourwifecompanyinyourcarriage。"

Igavethefairladymyhandrespectfully，andshetookitwithanairofindifference，butasIwashelpingherinshepressedmyhandwithallhermight。Thereadercanimaginehowthatpressuremademybloodcirculatelikefireinmyveins。

Thuswewereseatedsidebyside，ourkneespressedtenderlyagainsteachother。Halfanhourseemedlikeaminute，butitmustnotbethoughtthatwewastedthetime。Ourlipsweregluedtogether，andwerenotsetaparttillwecamewithintenpacesoftheambassador’shouse，whichIcouldhavewishedattenleaguesdistance。Shewasthefirsttogetdown，andIwasalarmedtoseetheviolentblushwhichoverspreadherwholeface。Suchrednesslookedunnatural；itmightbetrayus；ourspringofhappinesswouldsoonbedry。ThewatchfuleyeoftheenviousAltonwouldbefixeduponus，andnotinvain；hertriumphwouldoutweighherhumiliation。Iwasatmywits’

end。

Loveandluck，whichhavesofavouredmethroughoutthecourseofmylife，cametomyaid。Ihadaboutmeasmallboxcontaininghellebore。Iopeneditasifbyinstinct，andinvitedhertotakeasmallpinch。Shedidso，andIfollowedherexample；butthedosewastoostrong，andasweweregoingupthestairswebegantosneeze，andforthenextquarterofanhourwecontinuedsneezing。

Peoplewereobligedtoattributeherhighcolourtothesneezing，oratleastnoonecouldgivevoicetoanyothersuppositions。Whenthesneezingfitwasover，thiswoman，whowasascleverasshewaspretty，saidherheadachewasgone，butshewouldtakecareanothertimenottotakesostrongadose。Ilookedoutofthecornerofmyeyeatthemaliciouswidow，whosaidnothingbutseemeddeepinthought。

ThispieceofgoodluckdecidedmeonstayingatSoleuretillmylovewascrownedwithsuccess，andIdeterminedtotakeacountryhouse。

Ishallnothavemuchopinionofmyreadersiftheyfindthemselvesinmyposition——rich，young，independent，fulloffire，andhavingonlypleasuretoseekfor——anddonotfollowmyexample。AperfectbeautywasbeforemewithwhomIwasmadlyinlove，andwho，Iwassure，sharedthatlove。Ihadplentyofmoney，andIwasmyownmaster。Ithoughtthisamuchbetterplanthanturningmonk，andI

wasabovecaring"whatpeoplewouldsay。"Assoonastheambassadorhadreturned，whichhealwaysdidatanearlyhouronaccountofhisadvancedage，Ileftthecompanyandwenttoseehiminhisprivateroom。IntruthIfeltImustgivehimthatconfidencewhichhehadsowelldeserved。

Assoonashesawmehesaid，——

"Well，well，didyouprofitbytheinterviewIgotyou？"

Iembracedhim，andsaid，——

"Imayhopeforeverything。"

WhenIwastellinghimaboutthehelleborehewaslavishinhiscomplimentsonmypresenceofmind，for，ashesaid，suchanunusualcolourwouldhavemadepeoplethinktherehadbeensomekindofacombat——asuppositionwhichwouldnothavetendedtowardsmysuccess。

AfterIhadtoldhimall，Iimpartedmyplan。

"Ishalldonothinginahurry，"saidI，"asIhavetotakecarethatthelady’shonourdoesnotsuffer，andItrusttotimetoseetheaccomplishmentofmywishes。Ishallwantaprettycountryhouse，agoodcarriage，twolackeys，agoodcook，andahousekeeper。AllthatIleavetoyourexcellency，asIlookuponyouasmyrefugeandguardianangel。"

"To—morrow，withoutfail，IwillseewhatIcando，andIhavegoodhopesofdoingyouaconsiderableserviceandofrenderingyouwellcontentwiththeattractionsofSoleure。"

Nextdayourrehearsalwentoffadmirably，andthedayaftertheambassadorspoketomeasfollows:

"SofarasIcansee，whatyouareaimingatinthisintrigueisthesatisfyingofyourdesireswithoutdoinganyharmtothelady’sreputation。IthinkIknowthenatureofyourloveforherwellenoughtosaythatifshetoldyouthatyourleavingSoleurewasnecessarytoherpeaceofmindyouwouldleaveheratonce。YouseethatIhavesoundedyouwellenoughtobeacompetentadviserinthisdelicateandimportantaffair，towhichthemostfamouseventsintheannalsofdiplomacyarenottobecompared。"

"Yourexcellencydoesnotdosufficientjusticetoacareerwhichhasgainedyousuchdistinction。"

"That’sbecauseIamanoldman，mydearfellow，andhaveshakenofftherustanddustofprejudices，andamabletoseethingsastheyreallyare，andappreciatethemattheirtruevalue。Butletusreturntoyourlove—affair。Ifyouwishtokeepitinthedark，youmustavoidwiththegreatestcareanyactionwhichmayawakensuspicioninthemindsofpeoplewhodonotbelievethatanythingisindifferent。ThemostmaliciousandcensoriouswillnotbeabletogetanythingbutthemerestchanceoutoftheinterviewIprocuredyoutoday，andtheaccidentofthesneezingbout，defythemostill—

naturedtodrawanydeductions；foraneagerloverdoesnotbeginhissuitbysendingthebelovedoneintoconvulsions。Nobodycanguessthatyourhelleborewasusedtoconcealtheblushthatyourcaressesoccasioned，sinceitdoesnotoftenhappenthatanamorouscombatleavessuchtraces；andhowcanyoubeexpectedtohaveforeseenthelady’sblushes，andtohaveprovidedyourselfwithaspecificagainstthem？Inshort，theeventsofto—daywillnotdiscloseyoursecret。

M。————who，althoughhewishestopassforamandevoidofjealousy，isalittlejealous；M。————himselfcannothaveseenanythingoutofthecommoninmyaskinghimtoreturnwithme，asIhadbusinessofimportancewithhim，andhehascertainlynoreasonsforsupposingthatIshouldbelikelytohelpyoutointriguewithhiswife。

Furthermore，thelawsofpolitenesswouldhaveforbiddenme，underanycircumstances，offeringtheladytheplaceIofferedhim，andasheprideshimselfonhispolitenesshecanraisenopossibleobjectiontothearrangementwhichwasmade。TobesureIamoldandyouareyoung——adistinctionnotunimportantinahusband’seyes。

"Afterthisexordium，"addedthegood—naturedambassador，withalaugh，"anexordiumwhichIhavedeliveredintheofficialstyleofasecretaryofstate，letusseewhereweare。Twothingsarenecessaryforyoutoobtainyourwished—forbliss。Thefirstthing，whichconcernsyoumoreparticularly，istomakeM。————yourfriend，andtoconcealfromhimthatyouhaveconceivedapassionforhiswife，andhereIwillaidyoutothebestofmyability。Thesecondpointconcernsthelady’shonour；allyourrelationswithhermustappearopenandabove—board。Consideryourselfundermyprotection；

youmustnoteventakeacountryhousebeforewehavefoundoutsomeplanforthrowingdustintotheeyesoftheobservant。However，youneednotbeanxious；Ihavehituponaplan。

"Youmustpretendtobetakenill，butyourillnessmustbeofsuchakindthatyourdoctorwillbeobligedtotakeyourwordforthesymptoms。Luckily，Iknowadoctorwhosesoleideaistoordercountryairforallcomplaints。Thisphysician，whoisaboutascleverashisbrethren，andkillsorcuresaswellasanyofthem，willcomeandfeelmypulseoneofthesedays。Youmusttakehisadvice，andforacoupleoflouishewillwriteyouaprescriptionwithcountryairasthechiefitem。Hewilltheninformeverybodythatyourcaseisserious，butthathewillanswerforyourcure。"

"Whatishisname？"

"DoctorHerrenschwand。"

"Whatishedoinghere？IknewhimatParis；hewasMadameduRumain’sdoctor。"

"Thatishisbrother。Nowfindoutsomepolitecomplaint，whichwilldoyoucreditwiththepublic。Itwillbeeasyenoughtofindahouse，andIwillgetyouanexcellentcooktomakeyourgruelandbeef—tea。"

Thechoiceofacomplaintcostmesomethought；Ihadtogiveitagooddealofattention。ThesameeveningImanagedtocommunicatemyplantoMadamewhoapprovedofit。Ibeggedhertothinkofsomewayofwritingtome，andshesaidshewould。

"Myhusband，"saidshe，"hasaveryhighopinionofyou。Hehastakennooffenceatourcominginthesamecarriage。Buttellme，wasitanaccidentordesignthatmadeM。deChavignitakemyhusbandandleaveustogether？"

"Itwastheresultofdesign，dearest。"Sheraisedherbeautifuleyesandbitherlips。"Areyousorryitwasso？"

"Alas！no。"

Inthreeorfourdays，onthedayonwhichweweregoingtoactL’Ecossaise，thedoctorcametodinewiththeambassadorandstayedtilltheeveningtoseetheplay。Atdesserthecomplimentedmeonmygoodhealth，onwhichItooktheopportunity，andtoldhimthatappearancesweredeceitful，andthatIshouldbegladtoconsulthimthenextday。Nodoubthewasdelightedtobedeceivedinhisestimateofmyhealth，andhesaidheshouldbegladifhecouldbeofanyservice。Hecalledonmeatthehouragreedupon，andItoldhimsuchsymptomsasmyfancydictated；amongstotherthings，thatI

wassubjecttocertainnocturnalirritationswhichmademeextremelyweak，especiallyinthereins。

"Quiteso，quiteso；it’satroublesomething，butwewillseewhatcanbedone。Myfirstremedy，whichyoumaypossiblynotcaremuchfor，isforyoutopasssixweeksinthecountry，whereyouwillnotseethoseobjectswhichimpressyourbrain，actingontheseventhpairofnerves，andcausingthatlumbardischargewhichnodoubtleavesyouinaverydepressedstate。"

"Yes，itcertainlydoes。"

"Quiteso，quiteso。Mynextremedyiscoldbathing。"

"Arethebathsfarfromhere？"

"Theyarewhereveryoulike。Iwillwriteyouaprescription，andthedruggistwillmakeitup。"

Ithankedhim，andafterhehadpouchedthedouble—louisIslippedpolitelyintohishand，hewentawayassuringmethatIshouldsoonexperienceanimprovementinmyhealth。BytheeveningthewholetownknewthatIwasillandhadtogointothecountry。M。deChavignisaidpleasantlyatdinnertothedoctor，thatheshouldhaveforbiddenmeallfemininevisitors；andmylamefriend，refiningontheidea，addedthatIshouldaboveallbedebarredaccesstocertainportraits，ofwhichIhadabox—full。Ilaughedapprovingly，andbeggedM。deChavigni，inthepresenceofthecompany，tohelpmetofindaprettyhouseandagoodcook，asIdidnotintendtotakemymealsalone。

Iwastiredofplayingawearisomepart，andhadleftoffgoingtoseemylamefriend，butshesoonreproachedmeformyinconstancy，tellingmethatIhadmadeatoolofher。"Iknowall，"saidthismaliciouswoman，"andIwillbeavenged。"

"Youcannotbeavengedfornothing，"saidI，"forIhaveneverdoneyouaninjury。However，ifyouintendtohavemeassassinated，I

shallapplyforpoliceprotection。"

"Wedon’tassassinatehere，"saidshe，savagely。"WearenotItalians。"

Iwasdelightedtoberelievedfromtheburdenofhersociety，andhenceforthMadamewasthesoleobjectofmythoughts。M。deChavigni，whoseemedtodelightinservingme，madeherhusbandbelievethatIwastheonlypersonwhocouldgettheDucdeChoiseultopardonacousinofhiswhowasintheguards，andhadhadthemisfortunetokillhismaninaduel。"This，"saidthekindlyoldgentleman，"isthebestwaypossibleofgainingthefriendshipofyourrival。Doyouthinkyoucanmanageit？"

"Iamnotpositiveofsuccess。"

"PerhapsIhavegonealittletoofar；butItoldhimthatbymeansofyouracquaintancewiththeDuchessedeGrammontyoucoulddoanythingwiththeminister。"

"Imustmakeyouatrueprophet；IwilldoallIcan。"

TheconsequencewasthatM。————informedmeofthefactsintheambassador’spresence，andbroughtmeallthepapersrelativetothecase。

IspentthenightinwritingtotheDuchessedeGrammont。Imademyletteraspatheticaspossible，withaviewtotouchingherheart，andthenherfather’s；andIthenwrotetotheworthyMadamed’Urfetellingherthatthewell—beingofthesublimeorderoftheRosyCrosswasconcernedinthepardonofaSwissofficer，whohadbeenobligedtoleavethekingdomonaccountofaduelinwhichtheorderwashighlyconcerned。

Inthemorning，afterrestingforanhour，Iwenttotheambassador，andshewedhimtheletterIhadwrittentotheduchess。Hethoughtitexcellentlyexpressed，andadvisedmetoskewittoM。————I

foundhimwithhisnight—capon；hewasextremelygratefulfortheinterestItookinamatterwhichwassoneartohisheart。Hetoldmethathiswifehadnotyetrisen，andaskedmetowaitandtakebreakfastwithher。Ishouldhavemuchlikedtoaccepttheinvitation，butIbeggedhimtomakemyexcusestohisladyformyabsence，onthepretencethatIhadtofinishmyletters，andhandthemtothecourierwhowasjustleaving。Ihopedinthiswaytoscatteranyjealousythatmightbehoveringinhisbrain，bytheslightimportanceIattachedtoameetingwithhiswife。

IwenttodinewithM。deChavigni，whothoughtmyconducthadbeenverypolitic，andsaidthathewascertainthathenceforthM。————

wouldbemybestfriend。HethenskewedmealetterfromVoltairethankinghimforplayingMontroseinhisEcossaise；andanotherfromtheMarquisdeChauvelin，whowasthenatDeliceswiththephilosopherofFerney。HepromisedtocomeandseehimafterhehadbeentoTurin，wherehehadbeenappointedambassador。

CHAPTERXV

MyCountryHouse——MadameDubois——MaliciousTrickPlayedonMebyMyLameEnemy——MyVexationTherewasareceptionandasupperattheCourt，astheystyledthehotelofM。deChavigni，orratheroftheambassadoroftheKingofFranceinSwitzerland。AsIcameinIsawmycharmersittingapartreadingaletter。Iaccostedher，apologizingfornothavingstayedtobreakfast，butshesaidIhaddonequiteright，addingthatifI

hadnotchosenacountryhouseshehopedIwouldtakeoneherhusbandwouldprobablymentiontomethatevening。Shecouldnotsayanymore，asshewascalledawaytoagameatquadrille。FormypartI

didnotplay，butwanderedfromonetabletoanoth