第50章

“Wife，justmarried，dev’lishprettywoman，Ihear。”

theoldEarlsaid。

“Well，mydearBlanche。”saidthemother，“Isuppose，asPapawantstogo，wemustgo；butweneedn’tknowtheminEngland，youknow。”Andso，determinedtocuttheirnewacquaintanceinBondStreet，thesegreatfolkswenttoeathisdinneratBrussels，andcondescendingtomakehimpayfortheirpleasure，showedtheirdignitybymakinghiswifeuncomfortable，andcarefullyexcludingherfromtheconversation。Thisisaspeciesofdignityinwhichthehigh-bredBritishfemalereignssupreme。Towatchthebehaviourofafineladytootherandhumblerwomen，isaverygoodsportforaphilosophicalfrequenterofVanityFair。

Thisfestival，onwhichhonestGeorgespentagreatdealofmoney，wastheverydismallestofalltheentertainmentswhichAmeliahadinherhoneymoon。Shewrotethemostpiteousaccountsofthefeasthometohermamma：howtheCountessofBareacreswouldnotanswerwhenspokento；howLadyBlanchestaredatherwithhereye-glass；andwhatarageCaptainDobbinwasinattheirbehaviour；andhowmylord，astheycameawayfromthefeast，askedtoseethebill，andpronounceditad——baddinner，andd——dear。ButthoughAmeliatoldallthesestories，andwrotehomeregardingherguests’rudeness，andherowndiscomfiture，oldMrs。Sedleywasmightilypleasednevertheless，andtalkedaboutEmmy’sfriend，theCountessofBareacres，withsuchassiduitythatthenewshowhissonwasentertainingpeersandpeeressesactuallycametoOsborne’searsintheCity。

ThosewhoknowthepresentLieutenant-GeneralSirGeorgeTufto，K。C。B。，andhaveseenhim，astheymayonmostdaysintheseason，paddedandinstays，struttingdownPallMallwitharicketyswaggeronhishigh-heeledlacqueredboots，leeringunderthebonnetsofpassers-

by，orridingashowychestnut，andoglingbroughamsintheParks——thosewhoknowthepresentSirGeorgeTuftowouldhardlyrecognisethedaringPeninsularandWaterlooofficer。Hehasthickcurlingbrownhairandblackeyebrowsnow，andhiswhiskersareofthedeepestpurple。Hewaslight-hairedandbaldin1815，andstouterinthepersonandinthelimbs，whichespeciallyhaveshrunkverymuchoflate。Whenhewasaboutseventyyearsofage(heisnownearlyeighty)，hishair，whichwasveryscarceandquitewhite，suddenlygrewthick，andbrown，andcurly，andhiswhiskersandeyebrowstooktheirpresentcolour。Ill-naturedpeoplesaythathischestisallwool，andthathishair，becauseitnevergrows，isawig。TomTufto，withwhosefatherhequarrelledeversomanyyearsago，declaresthatMademoiselledeJaisey，oftheFrenchtheatre，pulledhisgrandpapa’shairoffinthegreen-room；butTomisnotoriouslyspitefulandjealous；andtheGeneral’swighasnothingtodowithourstory。

Oneday，assomeofourfriendsofthe——thweresaunteringintheflower-marketofBrussels，havingbeentoseetheHoteldeVille，whichMrs。MajorO’Dowddeclaredwasnotnearsolargeorhandsomeasherfawther’smansionofGlenmalony，anofficerofrank，withanorderlybehindhim，rodeuptothemarket，anddescendingfromhishorse，cameamongsttheflowers，andselectedtheveryfinestbouquetwhichmoneycouldbuy。

Thebeautifulbundlebeingtiedupinapaper，theofficerremounted，givingthenosegayintothechargeofhismilitarygroom，whocarrieditwithagrin，followinghischief，whorodeawayingreatstateandself-satisfaction。

“YoushouldseetheflowersatGlenmalony。”Mrs。

O’Dowdwasremarking。”MefawtherhasthreeScotchgarnerswithninehelpers。Wehaveanacreofhot-houses，andpinesascommonaspaysinthesayson。Ourgreepsweighssixpoundseverybunchof’em，anduponmehonourandconscienceIthinkourmagnoliasisasbigastaykettles。”

Dobbin，whoneverusedto“drawout“Mrs。O’DowdasthatwickedOsbornedelightedindoing(muchtoAmelia’sterror，whoimploredhimtospareher)，fellbackinthecrowd，crowingandsputteringuntilhereachedasafedistance，whenheexplodedamongsttheastonishedmarket-peoplewithshrieksofyellinglaughter。

“Hwhat’sthatgawkygugglingabout？”saidMrs。

O’Dowd。”Isithisnosebleedn？Healwaysusedtosay’twashisnosebleedn，tillhemusthavepompedallthebloodoutof’um。An’tthemagnoliasatGlenmalonyasbigastaykettl