第55章

HeaccordinglyaddressedacarefullyconsideredepistletoSue，and，knowingheremotionaltemperament，threwaRhadamanthinestrictnessintothelineshereandthere，carefullyhidinghisheterodoxfeelings，nottofrightenher。Hestatedthat，ithavingcometohisknowledgethatherviewshadconsiderablychanged，hefeltcompelledtosaythathisown，too，werelargelymodifiedbyeventssubsequenttotheirparting。Hewouldnotconcealfromherthatpassionatelovehadlittletodowithhiscommunication。

Itarosefromawishtomaketheirlives，ifnotasuccess，atleastnosuchdisastrousfailureastheythreatenedtobecome，throughhisactingonwhathehadconsideredatthetimeaprincipleofjustice，charity，andreason。

Toindulgeone’sinstinctiveanduncontrolledsenseofjusticeandright，wasnot，hehadfound，permittedwithimpunityinanoldcivilizationlikeours。Itwasnecessarytoactunderanacquiredandcultivatedsenseofthesame，ifyouwishedtoenjoyanaverageshareofcomfortandhonour；

andtoletcrudelovingkindnesstakecareofitself。

HesuggestedthatsheshouldcometohimthereatMarygreen。

Onsecondthoughtshetookoutthelastparagraphbutone；andhavingrewrittentheletterhedispatcheditimmediately，andinsomeexcitementawaitedtheissue。

AfewdaysafterafiguremovedthroughthewhitefogwhichenvelopedtheBeershebasuburbofChristminster，towardsthequarterinwhichJudeFawleyhadtakenuphislodgingsincehisdivisionfromSue。Atimidknocksoundeduponthedoorofhisabode。

Itwasevening-sohewasathome；andbyaspeciesofdivinationhejumpedupandrushedtothedoorhimself。

`Willyoucomeoutwithme？Iwouldrathernotcomein。Iwantto-totalkwithyou-andtogowithyoutothecemetery。’

IthadbeeninthetremblingaccentsofSuethatthesewordscame。

Judeputonhishat。`Itisdrearyforyoutobeout，’hesaid。`Butifyouprefernottocomein，Idon’tmind。’

`Yes-Ido。Ishallnotkeepyoulong。’

Judewastoomuchaffectedtogoontalkingatfirst；she，too，wasnowsuchamereclusterofnervesthatallinitiatorypowerseemedtohavelefther，andtheyproceededthroughthefoglikeAcheronticshadesforalongwhile，withoutsoundorgesture。

`Iwanttotellyou，’shepresentlysaid，hervoicenowquick，nowslow，`sothatyoumaynothearofitbychance。IamgoingbacktoRichard。Hehas-somagnanimously-agreedtoforgiveall。’

`Goingback？Howcanyougo——’

`Heisgoingtomarrymeagain。Thatisforform’ssake，andtosatisfytheworld，whichdoesnotseethingsastheyare。ButofcourseIamhiswifealready。Nothinghaschangedthat。’

Heturneduponherwithananguishthatwaswell-nighfierce。

`Butyouaremywife！Yes，youare。Youknowit。Ihavealwaysregrettedthatfeintofoursingoingawayandpretendingtocomebacklegallymarried，tosaveappearances。Ilovedyou，andyoulovedme；andweclosedwitheachother；andthatmadethemarriage。Westilllove-

youaswellasI-knowit，Sue！Thereforeourmarriageisnotcancelled。’

`Yes；Iknowhowyouseeit，’sheansweredwithdespairingself-suppression。

`ButIamgoingtomarryhimagain，asitwouldbecalledbyyou。Strictlyspeakingyou，too-don’tmindmysayingit，Jude！-youshouldtakeback-Arabella。’

`Ishould？GoodGod-whatnext！ButhowifyouandIhadmarriedlegally，aswewereonthepointofdoing？’

`Ishouldhavefeltjustthesame-thatourswasnotamarriage。

AndIwouldgobacktoRichardwithoutrepeatingthesacrament，ifheaskedme。But`theworldanditswayshaveacertainworth’(Isuppose)：thereforeIconcedearepetitionoftheceremony……Don’tcrushallthelifeoutofmebysatireandargument，Iimploreyou！Iwasstrongestonce，Iknow，andperhapsItreatedyoucruelly。ButJude，returngoodforevil！Iamtheweakernow。Don’tretaliateuponme，butbekind。Ohbekindtome-apoorwickedwomanwhoistryingtomend！’

Heshookhisheadhopelessly，hiseyeswet。Theblowofherbereavementseemedtohavedestroyedherreasoningfaculty。Theoncekeenvisionwasdimmed。`Allwrong，allwrong！’hesaidh