第37章

`Butbyyourownwish，dearSue，weareonlytobefriends，notlovers！Itissoveryinconsistentofyouto——’

`Friendscanbejealous！’

`Idon’tseethat。YouconcedenothingtomeandIhavetoconcedeeverythingtoyou。Afterall，youwereongoodtermswithyourhusbandatthattime。’

`No，Iwasn’t，Jude。Ohhowcanyouthinkso！Andyouhavetakenmein，evenifyoudidn’tintendto。’Shewassomortifiedthathewasobligedtotakeherintoherroomandclosethedoorlestthepeopleshouldhear。`Wasitthisroom？Yesitwas-Iseebyyourlookitwas！Iwon’thaveitformine！Ohitwastreacherousofyoutohaveheragain！Ijumpedoutofthewindow！’

`ButSue，shewas，afterall，mylegalwife，ifnot-’

SlippingdownonherkneesSueburiedherfaceinthebedandwept。

`Ineverknewsuchanunreasonable-suchadog-in-the-mangerfeeling，’saidJude。`Iamnottoapproachyou，noranybodyelse！’

`Ohdon’tyouunderstandmyfeeling！Whydon’tyou！

Whyareyousogross！Ijumpedoutofthewindow！’

`Jumpedoutofwindow？’

`Ican’texplain！’

Itwastruethathedidnotunderstandherfeelingsverywell。

Buthedidalittle；andbegantolovehernonetheless。

`I-Ithoughtyoucaredfornobody-desirednobodyintheworldbutmeatthattime-andeversince！’continuedSue。

`Itistrue。Ididnot，anddon’tnow！’saidJude，asdistressedasshe。

`Butyoumusthavethoughtmuchofher！Or-’

`No-Ineednot-youdon’tunderstandmeeither-womenneverdo！Whyshouldyougetintosuchatantrumaboutnothing？’

Lookingupfromthequiltshepoutedprovokingly：`Ifithadn’tbeenforthat，perhapsIwouldhavegoneontotheTemperanceHotel，afterall，asyouproposed；forIwasbeginningtothinkIdidbelongtoyou！’

`Oh，itisofnoconsequence！’saidJudedistantly。

`Ithought，ofcourse，thatshehadneverbeenreallyyourwifesincesheleftyouofherownaccordyearsandyearsago！Mysenseofitwas，thatapartingsuchasyoursfromher，andminefromhim，endedthemarriage。’

`Ican’tsaymorewithoutspeakingagainsther，andIdon’twanttodothat，’saidhe。`YetImusttellyouonething，whichwouldsettlethematterinanycase。Shehasmarriedanotherman-reallymarriedhim！

Iknewnothingaboutittillafterthevisitwemadehere。’

`Marriedanother？……Itisacrime-astheworldtreatsit，butdoesnotbelieve。’

`There-nowyouareyourselfagain。Yes，itisacrime-asyoudon’thold，butwouldfearfullyconcede。ButIshallneverinformagainsther！Anditisevidentlyaprickofconscienceinherthathasledhertourgemetogetadivorce，thatshemayremarrythismanlegally。SoyouperceiveIshallnotbelikelytoseeheragain。’

`Andyoudidn’treallyknowanythingofthiswhenyousawher？’

saidSuemoregently，assherose。

`Ididnot。Consideringallthings，Idon’tthinkyououghttobeangry，darling！’

`Iamnot。ButIshan’tgototheTemperanceHotel！’

Helaughed。`Nevermind！’hesaid。`SothatIamnearyou，Iamcomparativelyhappy。ItismorethanthisearthlywretchcalledMedeserves-youspirit，youdisembodiedcreature，youdear，sweet，tantalizingphantom-hardlyfleshatall；sothatwhenIputmyarmsroundyouIalmostexpectthemtopassthroughyouasthroughair！Forgivemeforbeinggross，asyoucallit！Rememberthatourcallingcousinswhenreallystrangerswasasnare。Theenmityofourparentsgaveapiquancytoyouinmyeyesthatwasintensereventhanthenoveltyofordinarynewacquaintance。’

`Saythoseprettylines，then，fromShelley’s`Epipsychidion’

asiftheymeantme！’shesolicited，slantingupclosertohimastheystood。`Don’tyouknowthem？’

`Iknowhardlyanypoetry，’herepliedmournfully。

`Don’tyou？Thesearesomeofthem：

TherewasaBeingwhommyspiritoftMetonitsvisionedwanderingsfaraloft……AseraphofHeaven，toogentletobehuman，Veilingbeneaththatradiantformofwoman……Ohitistooflattering，soIwon’tgoon！Butsayit’sme！Sayit’sme！’

`Itisyou，dear；exactlylikeyou！’

`NowIforgiveyou！Andyoushallkissmejustoncethere-notverylong。’Sheputthetipofherfingergingerlytohercheek；andhedidascommanded。`Youdocareformeverymuch，don’tyou，inspiteofmynot-youknow？’

`Ye