第41章

`AndI，too，mustupandoff！’repliedtheother，springingoutofbedsosuddenlythatthesoftpartsofherpersonshook。Suejumpedasideintrepidation。`Lord，Iamonlyawoman-notasix-footsojer！……Justamoment，dear，’shecontinued，puttingherhandonSue’sarm。

`IreallydidwanttoconsultJudeonalittlematterofbusiness，asI

toldhim。Icameaboutthatmorethananythingelse。WouldherunuptospeaktomeatthestationasIamgoing？Youthinknot。Well，I’llwritetohimaboutit。Ididn’twanttowriteit，butnevermind-Iwill。’

JudetheObscureChapter37V-iiiWhenSuereachedhomeJudewasawaitingheratthedoortotaketheinitialsteptowardstheirmarriage。Sheclaspedhisarm，andtheywentalongsilentlytogether，astruecomradesoft-timesdo。Hesawthatshewaspreoccupied，andforboretoquestionher。

`OhJude-I’vebeentalkingtoher，’shesaidatlast。`IwishIhadn’t！Andyetitisbesttoberemindedofthings。’

`Ihopeshewascivil。’

`Yes。I-Ican’thelplikingher-justalittlebit！She’snotanungenerousnature；andIamsogladherdifficultieshaveallsuddenlyended。’SheexplainedhowArabellahadbeensummonedback，andwouldbeenabledtoretrieveherposition。`Iwasreferringtoouroldquestion。

WhatArabellahasbeensayingtomehasmademefeelmorethaneverhowhopelesslyvulgaraninstitutionlegalmarriageis-asortoftraptocatchaman-Ican’tbeartothinkofit。IwishIhadn’tpromisedtoletyouputupthebannsthismorning！’

`Oh，don’tmindme。Anytimewilldoforme。Ithoughtyoumightliketogetitoverquickly，now。’

`Indeed，Idon’tfeelanymoreanxiousnowthanIdidbefore。

PerhapswithanyothermanImightbealittleanxious；butamongtheveryfewvirtuespossessedbyyourfamilyandmine，dear，IthinkImaysetstaunchness。SoIamnotabitfrightenedaboutlosingyou，nowIreallyamyoursandyoureallyaremine。Infact，IameasierinmymindthanIwas，formyconscienceisclearaboutRichard，whonowhasarighttohisfreedom。Ifeltweweredeceivinghimbefore。’

`Sue，youseemwhenyouarelikethistobeoneofthewomenofsomegrandoldcivilization，whomIusedtoreadaboutinmybygone，wasted，classicaldays，ratherthanadenizenofamereChristiancountry。IalmostexpectyoutosayatthesetimesthatyouhavejustbeentalkingtosomefriendwhomyoumetintheViaSacra，aboutthelatestnewsofOctaviaorLivia；orhavebeenlisteningtoAspasia’seloquence，orhavebeenwatchingPraxiteleschisellingawayathislatestVenus，whilePhrynemadecomplaintthatshewastiredofposing。’

Theyhadnowreachedthehouseoftheparishclerk。Suestoodback，whileherloverwentuptothedoor。Hishandwasraisedtoknockwhenshesaid：`Jude！’

Helookedround。

`Waitaminute，wouldyoumind？’

Hecamebacktoher。

`Justletusthink，’shesaidtimidly。`Ihadsuchahorriddreamonenight！……AndArabella——’

`WhatdidArabellasaytoyou？’heasked`Oh，shesaidthatwhenpeopleweretiedupyoucouldgetthelawofamanbetterifhebeatyou-andhowwhencouplesquarrelled……

Jude，doyouthinkthatwhenyoumusthavemewithyoubylaw，weshallbesohappyaswearenow？Themenandwomenofourfamilyareverygenerouswheneverythingdependsupontheirgoodwill，buttheyalwayskickagainstcompulsion。Don’tyoudreadtheattitudethatinsensiblyarisesoutoflegalobligation？Don’tyouthinkitisdestructivetoapassionwhoseessenceisitsgratuitousness？’

`Uponmyword，love，youarebeginningtofrightenme，too，withallthisforeboding！Well，let’sgobackandthinkitover。’

Herfacebrightened。`Yes-sowewill！’saidshe。Andtheyturnedfromtheclerk’sdoor，Suetakinghisarmandmurmuringastheywalkedonhomeward：

Canyoukeepthebeefromranging，Orthering-dovesneckfromchanging？

No！Norfetter’dlove……Theythoughtitover，orpostponedthinking。Certainlytheypostponedaction，andseemedtoliveoninadreamyparadise。Attheendofafortnightorthreeweeksmattersremained