ULYSSES

第104章

BLOOM(Herhandsandfeaturesworking。)ItwasGeraldconvertedmetobeatruecorsetloverwhenIwasfemaleimpersonatorintheHighSchoolplayViceVersa。ItwasdearGerald。Hegotthatkink,fascinatedbysister’sstays。NowdearestGeraldusespinkygreasepaintandgildshiseyelids。Cultofthebeautiful。

BELLO(Withwickedglee。)Beautiful!Giveusabreather!Whenyoutookyourseatwithwomanishcare,liftingyourbillowyflounces,onthesmoothwornthrone。

BLOOMScience。Tocomparethevariousjoysweeachenjoy。(Earnestly。)

Andreallyit’sbettertheposition……becauseoftenIusedtowet。

BELLO(Sternly。)Noinsubordination。Thesawdustisthereinthecornerforyou。Igaveyoustrictinstructions,didn’tI?Doitstanding,sir!I’llteachyoutobehavelikeajinkleman!IfIcatchatraceonyourswaddles。Aha!BytheassoftheDoransyou’llfindI’mamartinet。Thesinsofyourpastarerisingagainstyou。Many。Hundreds。

THESINSOFTHEPAST(Inamedleyofvoices。)HewentthroughaformofclandestinemarriagewithatleastonewomanintheshadowoftheBlackChurch。UnspeakablemessageshetelephonedmentallytoMissDunnatanaddressind’OlierStreetwhilehepresentedhimselfindecentlytotheinstrumentinthecallbox。Bywordanddeedheencouragedanocturnalstrumpettodepositfecalandothermatterinanunsanitaryouthouseattachedtoemptypremises。Infivepublicconvenienceshewrotepencilledmessagesofferinghisnuptialpartnertoallstrongmemberedmales。Andbytheoffensivelysmellingvitriolworksdidhenotpassnightafternightbylovingcourtingcouplestoseeifandwhatandhowmuchhecouldsee?Didhenotlieinbed,thegrossboar,gloatingoveranauseousfragmentofwellusedtoiletpaperpresentedtohimbyanastyharlot,stimulatedbygingerbreadandapostalorder?

BELLO(Whistlesloudly。)Say!Whatwasthemostrevoltingpieceofobscenityinallyourcareerofcrime?Gothewholehog。Pukeitout。

Becandidforonce。

(Muteinhumanfacesthrongforward,leering,vanishing,gibbering,Eooloohoom。PoldyHock,Bootlacesapenny,cassidy’shag,blindstripling,LarryRhinoceros,thegirl,thewoman,thewhore,theotherthe……

)

BLOOMDon’taskme。Ourmutualfaith。Pleasantsstreet。Ionlythoughtthehalfofthe……Iswearonmysacredoath……

BELLO(Peremptorily。)Answer。Repugnantwretch!Iinsistonknowing。

Tellmesomethingtoamuseme,smutorabloodygood-ghoststoryoralineofpoetry,quick,quick,quick!Where?How?Whattime?Withhowmany?I

giveyoujustthreeseconds。One!Two!Thr……!

BLOOM(Docile,gurgles。)Irererepugnosedinrerererepugnant……

BELLO(Imperiously。)Ogetout,youskunk!Holdyourtongue!

Speakwhenyou’respokento。

BLOOM(Bows。)Master!Mistress!Mantamer!

(Heliftshisarms。Hisbanglebraceletsfall。)

BELLO(Satirically。)Bydayyouwillsouseandbatoursmellingunderclothes,alsowhenweladiesareunwell,andswaboutourlatrineswithdresspinnedupandadishclouttiedtoyourtail。Won’tthatbenice?(Heplacesarubyringonherfinger。)Andtherenow!WiththisringItheeown。

Say,thankyou,mistress。

BLOOMThankyou,mistress。

BELLOYouwillmakethebeds,getmytubready,emptythepisspotsinthedifferentrooms,includingoldMrsKeogh’sthecook’s,asandyone。

Ay,andrinsethesevenofthemwell,mind,orlapituplikechampagne。

Drinkmepipinghot。Hop!youwilldanceattendanceorI’lllectureyouonyourmisdeeds,MissRuby,andspankyourbarebotrightwell,miss,withthehairbrush。You’llbetaughttheerrorofyourways。Atnightyourwellcreamedbraceletedhandswillwearfortythreebuttonglovesnewpowderedwithtalcandhavingdelicatelyscentedfingertips。Forsuchfavoursknightsofoldlaiddowntheirlives。(Hechuckles。)Myboyswillbenoendcharmedtoseeyousoladylike,thecolonel,aboveall。Whentheycomeherethenightbeforetheweddingtofondlemynewattractioningildedheels。First,I’llhaveagoatyoumyself。AmanIknowontheturfnamedCharlesAlbertaMarsh(Iwasinbedw

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