第90章

PRIVATECARR(ToCissy。)Washeinsultingyouwhilemeandhimwashavingapiss？

LORDTENNYSON(InUnionJackblazerandcricketflannels，bareheaded，flowingbearded。)Their’snottoreasonwhy。

PRIVATECOMPTONBiffhim，Harry。

STEPHEN(ToPrivateCompton。)Idon’tknowyournamebutyouarequiteright。DoctorSwiftsaysonemaninarmourwillbeattenmenintheirshirts。Shirtissynechdoche。Partforthewhole。

CISSYCAFFREY(Tothecrowd。)No，Iwaswiththeprivate。

STEPHEN(Amiably。)Whynot？Theboldsoldierboy。Inmyopinioneveryladyforexample……

PRIVATECARR(Hiscapawry，advancingtoStephen。)Say，howwoulditbe，governor，ifIwastobashinyourjaw？

STEPHEN(Looksupinthesky。)How？Veryunpleasant。Nobleartofself-pretence。Personally，Idetestaction。(Hewaveshishand)

Handhurtsmeslightly。Enfin，cesontvosoignons。

(ToCissyCaffrey。)Sometroubleisonhere。Whatisit，precisely？

DOLLYGRAY(FromherbalconywavesherhandkerchiefgivingthesignoftheheroineofJericho。)Rahab。Cook’sson，goodbye。SafehometoDolly。Dreamofthegirlyouleftbehindandshewilldreamofyou。

(Thesoldiersturntheirswimmingeyes。)

BLOOM(ElbowingthroughthecrowdplucksStephen’ssleevevigorously。)

Comenow，professor，thatcarmaniswaiting。

STEPHEN(Turns。)Eh？(Hedisengageshimself)WhyshouldInotspeaktohimortoanyhumanbeingwhowalksuprightuponthisoblateorange？(Hepointshisfinger。)I’mnotafraidofwhatIcantalktoifIseehiseye。Retainingtheperpendicular。

(Hestaggersapaceback。)

BLOOM(Proppinghim。)Retainyourown。

STEPHEN(Laughsemptily。)Mycentreofgravityisdisplaced。

Ihaveforgottenthetrick。Letussitdownsomewhereanddiscuss。Struggleforlifeisthelawofexistencebutmodernphilirenists，notablythetsarandthekingofEngland，haveinventedarbitration。(Hetapshisbrow。)

ButinhereitisImustkillthepriestandtheking。

BIDDYTHECLAPDidyouhearwhattheprofessorsaid？He’saprofessoroutofthecollege。

CUNTYKATEIdid。Iheardthat。

BIDDYTHECLAPHeexpresseshimselfwithmuchmarkedrefinementofphraseology。

CUNTYKATEIndeed，yes。Andatthesametimewithsuchappositetrenchancy。

PRIVATECARR(Pullshimselffreeandcomesforward。)What’sthatyou’resayingaboutmyking？

(EdwardtheSeventhappearsinanarchway。HewearsawhitejerseyonwhichanimageoftheSacredHeartisstitched，withtheinsigniaofGarterandThistle，GoldenFleece，ElephantofDenmark，Skinners’andProbyns’

horse，Lincoln’sInnbencherandancientandhonourableartillerycompanyofMassachusetts。Hesucksaredjujube。Heisrobedasagrandelectperfectandsublimemasonwithtrowelandapron，markedmadeinGermany。Inhislefthandheholdsaplasterersbucketonwhichisprinted：Dé；fensed’uriner。Aroarofwelcomegreetshim。)

EDWARDTHESEVENTH(Slowly，solemnlybutindistinctly。)Peace，perfectpeace。Foridentificationbucketinmyhand。Cheerio，boys。(Heturnstohissubjects。)Wehavecomeheretowitnessacleanstraightfightandweheartilywishbothmenthebestofgoodluck。Mahakmakaraback。

(HeshakeshandswithPrivateCarr，PrivateCompton，Stephen，BloomandLynch。Generalapplause。EdwardtheSeventhliftsthebucketgraciouslyinacknowledgement。)

PRIVATECARR(ToStephen。)Sayitagain。

STEPHEN(Nervous，friendly，pullshimselfup。)Iunderstandyourpointofview，thoughIhavenokingmyselfforthemoment。Thisistheageofpatentmedicine。Adiscussionisdifficultdownhere。Butthisis