第60章

Johnwouldhavepreferredhisownfiresideifithadnotbeensolonely，butasitwashegratefullytookthenextbestthingandenjoyedhisneighbor’ssociety。

Megratherapprovedofthenewarrangementatfirst，andfounditarelieftoknowthatJohnwashavingagoodtimeinsteadofdozingintheparlor，ortrampingaboutthehouseandwakingthechildren。Butby-and-by，whentheteethingworrywasoverandtheidolswenttosleepatproperhours，leavingMammatimetorest，shebegantomissJohn，andfindherworkbasketdullcompany，whenhewasnotsittingoppositeinhisolddressinggown，comfortablyscorchinghisslippersonthefender。Shewouldnotaskhimtostayathome，butfeltinjuredbecausehedidnotknowthatshewantedhimwithoutbeingtold，entirelyforgettingthemanyeveningshehadwaitedforherinvain。Shewasnervousandwornoutwithwatchingandworry，andinthatunreasonableframeofmindwhichthebestofmothersoccasionallyexperiencewhendomesticcaresoppressthem。Wantofexerciserobsthemofcheerfulness，andtoomuchdevotiontothatidolofAmericanwomen，theteapot，makesthemfeelasiftheywereallnerveandnomuscle。

“Yes，“shewouldsay，lookingintheglass，“I’mgettingoldandugly。Johndoesn’tfindmeinterestinganylonger，soheleaveshisfadedwifeandgoestoseehisprettyneighbor，whohasnoincumbrances。Well，thebabiesloveme，theydon’tcareifIamthinandpaleandhaven’ttimetocrimpmyhair，theyaremycomfort，andsomedayJohnwillseewhatI’vegladlysacrificedforthem，won’the，myprecious？“

Towhichpatheticappealdaisywouldanswerwithacoo，orDemiwithacrow，andMegwouldputbyherlamentationsforamaternalrevel，whichsoothedhersolitudeforthetimebeing。

ButthepainincreasedaspoliticsabsorbedJohn，whowasalwaysrunningovertodiscussinterestingpointswithScott，quiteunconsciousthatMegmissedhim。Notaworddidshesay，however，tillhermotherfoundherintearsoneday，andinsistedonknowingwhatthematterwas，forMeg’sdroopingspiritshadnotescapedherobservation。

“Iwouldn’ttellanyoneexceptyou，Mother，butIreallydoneedadvice，forifJohngoesonmuchlongerImightaswellbewidowed，“repliedMrs。Brooke，dryinghertearsonDaisy’sbibwithaninjuredair。

“Goesonhow，mydear？“askedhermotheranxiously。

“He’sawayallday，andatnightwhenIwanttoseehim，heiscontinuallygoingovertotheScotts’。Itisn’tfairthatIshouldhavethehardestwork，andneveranyamusement。

Menareveryselfish，eventhebestofthem。“

“Soarewomen。Don’tblameJohntillyouseewhereyouarewrongyourself。“

“Butitcan’tberightforhimtoneglectme。“

“Don’tyouneglecthim？“

“Why，Mother，Ithoughtyou’dtakemypart!“

“SoIdo，asfarassympathizinggoes，butIthinkthefaultisyours，Meg。“

“Idon’tseehow。“

“Letmeshowyou。DidJohneverneglectyou，asyoucallit，whileyoumadeitapointtogivehimyoursocietyofanevening，hisonlyleisuretime？“

“No，butIcan’tdoitnow，withtwobabiestotend。“

“Ithinkyoucould，dear，andIthinkyouought。MayI

speakquitefreely，andwillyourememberthatit’sMotherwhoblamesaswellasMotherwhosympathizes？“

“IndeedIwill!SpeaktomeasifIwerelittleMegagain。

IoftenfeelasifIneededteachingmorethaneversincethesebabieslooktomeforeverything。“

Megdrewherlowchairbesidehermother’s，andwithalittleinterruptionineitherlap，thetwowomenrockedandtalkedlovinglytogether，feelingthatthetieofmotherhoodmadethemmoreonethanever。

“Youhaveonlymadethemistakethatmostyoungwivesmake-forgottenyourdutytoyourhusbandinyourloveforyourchildren。

Averynaturalandforgivablemistake，Meg，butonethathadbetterberemediedbeforeyoutaketodifferentways，forchildrenshoulddrawyounearerthanever，notseparateyou，asiftheywereallyours，andJohnhadnothingtodobutsupportthem。I’veseenitforsomeweeks，buthavenotspoken，feelingsureitwouldcomerightintime。“

“I’mafraiditwon’t。IfIaskhimtostay，he’llthinkI’mjealous，andIwouldn’tinsulthimbysuchanidea。Hedoesn’tseethatIwanthim，andIdon’tknowhowtotellhimwithoutwords。“

“Makeitsopleasanthewon’twanttogoaway。Mydear，he’slongingforhislittlehome，butitisn’thomewithoutyou，andyouarealwaysinthenursery。“

“Oughtn’tItobethere？“

“Notallthetime，toomuchconfinementmakesyounervous，and