Lord Jim

第40章

Achainofislandssatbrokenandmassivefacingthewideestuary,displayedinasheetofpaleglassywaterreflectingfaithfullythecontouroftheshore。Highinthecolourlesssunshineasolitarybird,allblack,hovered,droppingandsoaringabovethesamespotwithaslightrockingmotionofthewings。Aragged,sootybunchofflimsymathovelswasperchedoveritsowninvertedimageuponacrookedmultitudeofhighpilesthecolourofebony。Atinyblackcanoeputofffromamongstthemwithtwotinymen,allblack,whotoiledexceedingly,strikingdownatthepalewater:andthecanoeseemedtoslidepainfullyonamirror。Thisbunchofmiserablehovelswasthefishingvillagethatboastedofthewhitelord’sespecialprotection,andthetwomencrossingoverweretheoldhead-manandhisson-in-law。Theylandedandwalkeduptousthewhitesand,lean,dark-brownasifdriedinsmoke,withashypatchesontheskinoftheirnakedshouldersandbreasts。Theirheadswereboundindirtybutcarefullyfoldedhandkerchiefs,andtheoldmanbeganatoncetostateacomplaint,voluble,stretchingalankarm,screwingupatJimhisoldblearedeyesconfidently。TheRajah’speoplewouldnotleavethemalone;therehadbeensometroubleaboutalotofturtles’eggshispeoplehadcollectedontheisletsthere——andleaningatarm’slengthuponhispaddle,hepointedwithabrownskinnyhandoverthesea。Jimlistenedforatimewithoutlookingup,andatlasttoldhimgentlytowait。Hewouldhearhimbyandby。Theywithdrewobedientlytosomelittledistance,andsatontheirheels,withtheirpaddleslyingbeforethemonthesand;thesilverygleamsintheireyesfollowedourmovementspatiently;andtheimmensityoftheoutspreadsea,thestillnessofthecoast,passingnorthandsouthbeyondthelimitsofmyvision,madeuponecolossalPresencewatchingusfourdwarfsisolatedonastripofglisteningsand。

“`Thetroubleis,“remarkedJim,moodily,“thatforgenerationsthesebeggarsoffishermeninthatvillagetherehadbeenconsideredastheRajah’spersonalslaves——andtheoldripcan’tgetitintohisheadthat……“

`Hepaused。“Thatyouhavechangedallthat,“Isaid。

“`Yes。I’vechangedallthat,“hemutteredinagloomyvoice。

“`Youhavehadyouropportunity,“Ipursued。

“`HadI?“hesaid。“Well,yes。Isupposeso。Yes。Ihavegotbackmyconfidenceinmyself——agoodname——yetsometimesIwish……No!IshallholdwhatI’vegot。Can’texpectanythingmore。“Heflunghisarmouttowardsthesea。“Notoutthereanyhow。“Hestampedhisfootuponthesand。“Thisismylimit,becausenothinglesswilldo。“

`Wecontinuedpacingthebeach。“Yes,I’vechangedallthat,“hewenton,withasidelongglanceatthetwopatientsquattingfishermen;“butonlytrytothinkwhatitwouldbeifIwentaway。Jove!can’tyouseeit?Hellloose。No!To-morrowIshallgoandtakemychanceofdrinkingthatsillyoldTunkuAllang’scoffee,andIshallmakenoendoffussovertheserottenturtle’seggs。No。Ican’tsay——enough。Never。Imustgoon,goonforeverholdingupmyend,tofeelsurethatnothingcantouchme。

Imuststicktotheirbeliefinmetofeelsafeandto——to“……Hecastaboutforaword,seemedtolookforitonthesea……“tokeepintouchwith“……Hisvoicesanksuddenlytoamurmur……“withthosewhom,perhaps,Ishallneverseeanymore。With——with——you,forinstance。“

`Iwasprofoundlyhumbledbyhiswords。“ForGod’ssake,“Isaid,“don’tsetmeup,mydearfellow;justlooktoyourself。“Ifeltagratitude,anaffection,forthatstragglerwhoseeyeshadsingledmeout,keepingmyplaceintheranksofaninsignificantmultitude。Howlittlethatwastoboastof,afterall!Iturnedmyburningfaceaway;underthelowsun,glowing,darkenedandcrimson,likeanembersnatchedfromthefire,thesealayoutspread,offeringallitsimmensestillnesstotheapproachofthefieryorb。Twicehewasgoingtospeak,butcheckedhimself:atlast,asifhehadfoundaformula:

“`Ishallbefaithful,“hesaid,quietly。“Ishallbefaithful,“herepeated,withoutlookingatme,butforthefirsttimelettinghiseyeswanderuponthewaters,whosebluenesshadchangedtoagloomypurpleunderthefiresofsunset。Ah!hewasromantic,romantic。IrecalledsomewordsofStein’s……“Inthedestructiveelementimmerse!……Tofollowthedream,andagaintofollowthedream——andso——always——usqueadfinem……“Hewasromantic,butnonethelesstrue。Whocouldtellwhatforms,whatvisions,whatfaces,whatforgivenesshecouldseeintheglowofthewest!……Asmallboat,leavingtheschooner,movedslowly,witharegularbeatoftwooars,towardsthesandbanktotakemeoff。“Andthenthere’sJe

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