第11章

ProbablyMrs。ClemensdivertedthispicturesquededicationinfavoroftheHigbieinscription，orperhapstheauthorneverreallyintendedtheliterarytributetoCain。Theimpulsethatinspiredit，however，wascharacteristic。

Inapostscripttothisletterheadds：

Mystockislookingup。Iamgettingthebulliestoffersforbooksandalmanacs；amfloodedwithlectureinvitations，andoneperiodicaloffersme$6，000cashfortwelvearticlesofanylength，andonanysubject，treatedhumorouslyorotherwise。

Hesetintomakehaywhilethesunwasshining。InadditiontotheCaliforniabook，whichwasnowfastnearingcompletion，hediscussedaschemewithGoodmanforasix—hundred—pageworkwhichtheyweretodojointly；heplannedandwroteoneortwoscenesfromaWesternplay，tobebuiltfromepisodesinthenewbook(oneofthemwasthe"Arkansas"

incident，relatedinChapterXXXI)；heperfectedoneofhisseveralinventions——anautomaticallyadjustingvest—strap；hewroteanumberofsketches，madeanoccasionalbusinesstriptoNewYorkandHartford；

prospectedthelatterplaceforanewhome。TheshadowwhichhadhungoverthesojourninBuffaloseemedtohavelifted。

HehadpromisedBlisssomecontributionsforhisnewpaper，andinJunehesentthreesketches。Inanaccompanyingletterhesays：

Herearethreearticleswhichyoumayhaveifyouwillpay$125forthelot。Ifyoudon’twantthemI’llsellthemtotheGalaxy，butnotforacentlessthanthreetimesthemoney……Ifyoutakethempayone—tenthofthe$125inweeklyinstalmentstoOriontillhehasreceiveditall。

Hereconsideredhisresolutionnottolectureagain，andclosedwithRedpathforthecomingseason。Hefoundhimselfinalecture—writingfever。Hewrotethreeoftheminsuccession：oneonArtemusWard，anotheron"ReminiscencesofSomePleasantCharactersIHaveMet，"andathirdonebasedonchaptersfromthenewbook。Ofthe"Reminiscence"

lecturehewroteRedpath：

"Itcoversmywholeacquaintance；kings，lunatics，idiots，andall。"

Immediatelyafterwardhewrotethathehadpreparedstillanotherlecture，"titletobeannouncedlater。"

"DuringJulyI’lldecidewhichoneIlikebest，"hesaid。HeinstructedRedpathnottomakeengagementsforhimtolectureinchurches。"Inevermadeasuccessofalectureinachurchyet。Peopleareafraidtolaughinachurch。"

Redpathwashavingdifficultiesinarrangingacircuittosuithim。

Clemenshadprejudicesagainstcertaintownsandlocalities，prejudicesthatwerelikelytochangeovernight。InAugusthewrote：

DEARRED，——Iamdifferentfromotherwomen；mymindchangesoftener。

Peoplewhohavenomindcaneasilybesteadfastandfirm，butwhenamanisloadeddowntotheguardswithit，asIam，everyheavyseaofforebodingorinclination，maybeofindolence，shiftsthecargo。

See？Therefore，ifyouwillnotice，oneweekIamlikelytogiverigidinstructionstoconfinemetoNewEngland；thenextweeksendmetoArizona；thenextweekwithdrawmyname；thenextweekgiveyoufull，untrammeledswing；andtheweekfollowingmodifyit。Youmusttrytokeeptherunofmymind，Redpaththatisyourbusiness，beingtheagent，anditalwayswastoomanyforme……NowabouttheWestthisweek，IamwillingthatyoushallretainalltheWesternengagements。ButwhatIshallwantnextweekisstillwithGod。

Yours，MARK。

HewasinHartfordwhenthisletterwaswritten，arrangingforresidencethereandtheremovalofhisbelongings。HefinallyleasedthefineHookerhouseonFordStreet，inthatpleasantseclusionknownasNookFarm——theliterarypartofHartford，whichincludedtheresidenceofCharlesDudleyWarnerandHarrietBeecherStowe。HearrangedforpossessionofthepremisesOctober1st。Sothenewhomewassettledupon；thenlearningthatNasbywastobeinBoston，heranovertothatcityforafewdaysofrecreationafterhisseason’slabors。

PreparationsforremovaltoHartfordwerenotdelayed。TheBuffalopropertywasdisposedof，thefurnishingswerepackedandshippedaway。

Thehousewhichasbrideandgroomtheyhadenteredsohappilywasleftemptyanddeserted，nevertobeenteredbythemagain。Intheyearandahalfoftheiroccupancyithadseenwell—nighallthehumanround，allthatgoestomakeupthehappinessandthesorrowoflife。

LXXXIII

LECTURINGDAYS

LifeinHartford，intheautumnof1871，beganintheletter，ratherthaninthespirit。Thenewcomerswerereceivedwithawide，neighborlywelcome，butthedisorderofestablishmentandthealmostimmediatedepartureoftheheadofthehouseholdonaprotractedlecturingtourweredisquietingthings；theatmosphereoftheClemenshomeduringthoseearlyHartforddaysgaveonlyafaintpromiseofitsfutureloveliness。

Asinafarlaterperiod，MarkTwainhadresortedtolecturingtopayoffdebt。HestillowedaportionofhisshareintheExpress；alsohehadbeenobligedtoobtainanadvancefromthelecturebureau。Hedreaded，asalways，thetediumoftravel，theclatterofhotellife，themonotonyofentertainment，while，morethanmostmen，helovedthetenderluxuryofhome。Itwasonlythathecouldnotaffordtolosetheprofitofferedontheplatform。

HisseasonopenedatBethlehem，Pennsylvania，October16th，andhisschedulecarriedhimhitherandthither，toandfro，overdistancesthatliebetweenBostonandChicago。TherewereopportunitiestorunintoHartfordnowandthen，whenhewasnottoofaraway，andinNovemberhelecturedthereonArtemusWard。

Hechangedhisentertainmentatleasttwicethatseason。Hebeganwiththe"Reminiscences，"thelecturewhichhesaidwouldtreatofallthosewhomhehadmet，"idiots，lunatics，andkings，"buthedidnotlikeit，oritdidnotgowell。HewroteRedpathoftheArtemusWardaddress：

"Itsuitsme，andI’llneverdeliverthenasty，nauseous’Reminiscences’

anymore。"

ButtheWardlecturewasgoodforlittlemorethanamonth，foronDecember8thhewroteagain：

NotifyallhandsthatfromthistimeIshalltalknothingbutselectionsfrommyforthcomingbook，’RoughingIt’。Triedittwicelastnight；suitsmetiptop。

Andsomewhatlater：

HadasplendidtimewithasplendidaudienceinIndianapolislastnight；aperfectlyjammedhouse，justasIhaveallthetimeouthere……Idon’tcarenowtohaveanyappointmentscanceled。I’lleven"fetch"thoseDutchPennsylvanianswiththislecture。

Havepaidup$4，000indebtedness。Youarethelastonmylist。

Shallbegintopayyouinafewdays，andthenIshallbeafreemanagain。

Undoubtedlyhereveledinthetriumphsofaplatformtour，thoughatnotimedidheregarditasapleasureexcursion。Duringthoseearlyweekstheproofsofhisnewbook，chasinghimfromplacetoplace，didnotaddtohiscomfort。Still，withlarge，substantialrewardsinhandandinprospect，onecouldenduremuch。

IntheneighborhoodofBostontherewereothercompensations。HecouldspendagoodpartofhisdaysattheLyceumheadquarters，inSchoolStreet，wheretherewasalwayscongenialfellowship——Nasby，JoshBillings，andtherestoftheperipateticgroupthatabouttheendoftheyearcollectedthere。TheirlectureswerenevertriedimmediatelyinBoston，butintheoutlyingtowns；triedandperfected——ordiscarded。

Whentheprovincialaudienceswerefinallysatisfied，thenthefinal。

testintheBostonMusicHallwasmade，andifthisprovedsuccessfultherestoftheseasonwassafe。Redpath’slecturersputupatYoung’sHotel，andspenttheirdaysatthebureau，smokingandspinningyarns，ortalkingshop。Earlyintheeveningtheyscatteredtotheoutlyingtowns，Lowell，Lexington，Concord，NewBedford。Thereisnosuchaconditionto—day：lecturersarefew，lecturebureausobscure；therearenogreatreputationsmadeontheplatform。

Neitheristhereanysuchdistinctgroupofhumoristsastheonejustmentioned。Humorhasbecomeuniversalsincethen。Fewwritersofthisagewouldconfesstotakingtheirworksoseriouslyastobeatalltimesunsmilinginit；onlyaboutasmany，infact，asinthatdaywouldconfesstotakingtheirworksolightlythattheycouldregardlife’ssternerphasesandphilosophieswithasmile。

JoshBillingswasoneofthegentlestandloveliestofourpioneersoflaughter。Thepresentgenerationisnotoverfamiliarevenwithhisname，butboththenameandsayingsofthatquaintsoulwereoneverybody’slipsatthetimeofwhichwearewriting。HistruenamewasHenryW。

Shaw，andhewasagenuine，smilingphilosopher，whomighthavebuiltupamorepermanentandseriousreputationhadhenotbeeninducedtodisfigurehismaximswithridiculousspellinginordertopopularizethemandmakethembringalivingprice。ItdidnotmattermuchwithNasby’swork。Anassumedilliteracybelongedwiththesideoflifewhichhepresented；butitispatheticnowtoconsidersomeofthereallymasterlysayingsofJoshBillingspresentedinthatuncouthformwhichwasregardedasapartofhumoragenerationago。Eventheaphorismsthatwereessentiallyhumorouslosevalueinthatdegradedspelling。

"Whenamanstartsdownhilleverythingisgreasedfortheoccasion，"

couldhardlybeimproveduponbydistortedorthography，andhereareafewmoregemswhichhavesurvivedthatdeadlyblight。

"Somefolksmistakevivacityforwit；whereasthedifferencebetweenvivacityandwitisthesameasthedifferencebetweenthelightning—bugandthelightning。"

"Don’ttakethebullbythehorns—takehimbythetail；thenyoucanletgowhenyouwantto。"

"Thedifficultyisnotthatweknowsomuch，butthatweknowsomuchthatisn’tso。"

JoshBillings，Nasby，andMarkTwainwereclosefriends。Theyhadthemselvesphotographedinagroup，andtherewasalwayssomepleasantrygoingonamongthem。JoshBillingsoncewroteon"Lekturing，"andundertheheadof"RuleSeven，"whichtreatedofunwisdomofinvitingalecturertoaprivatehouse，hesaid：

ThinkofaskingMarkTwainhomewithyu，forinstance。Yuregoodwifehasputherhouseinapple—pieorderfortheockashun；

everythingisjustintherightplace。Yudon’tsmokeinyurehouse，never。Yudon’tputyurefeetonthecenter—table，yudon’tskatterthenuzepapersallovertheroom，inutterconfushion：orderandekonemygovernsyurepremises。ButifyuexpecktMarkTwaintobehappy，orevenkumfortableyuhavgottobuyaboxofcigarsworthatleastseventeendollarsandyuhavgottomoveallthetenderthingsoutovyureparlor。Yuhavgottoskatterallthelatestpapersaroundtheroomcareless，youhavgottohavapitcherovicewaterhandy，forMarkisadryhumorist。Yuhavgottoketchandtieallyureyungones，hedandfoot，forMarkluvsbabysonlyintheory；yuhavgottosendyurefavoritekatovertothenaborsandhideyurepoodle。Thesearethingsthathavtobedone，orMarkwillpakhizvalisewithhizextryshirtcollarandhizlekturontheSandwichIslands，andtravelaroundyurestreets，smokingandreadingthesighnsoverthestoredoorwaysuntilllekturtimebegins。

Aswe—arenotlikelytotouchuponMarkTwain’slecturing，saveonlylightly，hereafter，itmaybeaswelltosaysomethingofhismethodatthisperiod。Atallplacesvisitedbylecturerstherewasacommittee，anditwastheplaceofthechairmantointroducethelecturer，aprivilegewhichhevalued，becauseitgavehimamomentaryassociationwithdistinctionandfame。Clemenswasagreatdisappointmenttotheseofficials。Hehadlearnedlongagothathecouldintroducehimselfmoreeffectivelythananyoneelse。Hisusualformulawastopresenthimselfasthechairmanofthecommittee，introducingthelectureroftheevening；then，withwhatwasineffectacompletechangeofpersonality，tobeginhislecture。Itwasalwaysstartlingandamusing，alwaysasuccess；butthepapersfinallyprintedthisformula，whichtookthefreshnessoutofit，sothathehadtoinventothers。Sometimeshegotupwiththefrankstatementthathewasintroducinghimselfbecausehehadnevermetanyonewhocouldpayapropertributetohistalents；butthenewspapersprintedthattoo，andheoftenroseandbeganwithnointroductionatall。

Whateverhismethodofbeginning，MarkTwain’sprocedureprobablywasthepurestexemplificationoftheplatformentertainer’sartwhichthiscountryhaseverseen。Itwastheartthatmakesyouforgettheartisanship，theartthatmadeeachhearerforgetthathewasnotbeingpersonallyentertainedbyanewandmarvelousfriend，whohadtraveledalongwayforhisparticularbenefit。Onelistenerhaswrittenthathesat"simmeringwithlaughter"throughwhathesupposedwasthecontinuationoftheintroduction，waitingforthetraditionallecturetobegin，whenpresentlythelecturer，withabow，disappeared，anditwasover。Thelistenerlookedathiswatch；hehadbeentheremorethananhour。Hethoughtitcouldbenomorethantenminutes，atmost。Manyhavetriedtosetdownsomethingoftheeffecthisartproducedonthem，butonemaynotclearlyconveythestoryofavanishedpresenceandasilentvoice。

TherewereotherpleasantassociationsinBoston。Howellswasthere，andAldrich；alsoBretHarte，whohadfinishedhistriumphalprogressacrossthecontinenttojointheAtlanticgroup。ClemensappearsnottohavemetAldrichbefore，thoughtheiracquaintancehadbegunayearearlier，whenAldrich，aseditorofEverySaturday，hadcommentedonapoementitled，"TheThreeAces，"whichhadappearedintheBuffaloExpress。

AldrichhadassumedthepoemtobetheworkofMarkTwain，andhadcharacterizeditas"afeebleimitationofBretHarte’s’HeathenChinee。’"Clemens，inaletter，hadmildlyprotestedastothechargeofauthorship，andAldrichhadpromptlyprintedtheletterwithapologeticexplanation。Aplayfulexchangeofpersonallettersfollowed，andthebeginningofalifelongfriendship。

Oneofthelettershasaspecialinteresthere。Clemenshadfollowedhisprotestwithanapologyforit，askingthatnofurthernoticebetakenofthematter。Aldrichrepliedthatitwastoolatetoprevent"doinghimjustice，"ashisexplanationwasalreadyonthepress，butthatifClemensinsistedhewouldwithdrawitinthenextissue。Clemensthenwrotethathedidnotwantitwithdrawn，andexplainedthathehatedtobeaccusedofplagiarizingBretHarte，towhomhewasdeeplyindebtedforliteraryschoolingintheCaliforniadays。Continuinghesaid：

DoyouknowtheprettiestfancyandtheneatestthatevershotthroughHarte’sbrain？Itwasthis。WhentheyweretryingtodecideuponavignettecoverfortheOverlandagrizzlybear(ofthearmsoftheStateofCalifornia)waschosen。NahlBros。carvedhimandthepagewasprintedwithhiminit。

Asabearhewasasuccess。Hewasagoodbear，butthen，itwasobjected，hewasanobjectlessbear——abearthatmeantnothing，signifiednothing，simplystoodthere，snarlingoverhisshoulderatnothing，andwaspainfullyandmanifestlyaboorishandill—naturedintruderuponthefairpage。Allhandssaidthatnoneweresatisfied；theyhatedbadlytogivehimup，andyettheyhatedasmuchtohavehimtherewhentherewasnopointtohim。ButpresentlyHartetookapencilanddrewtwosimplelinesunderhisfeet，andbeholdhewasamagnificentsuccess！——theancientsymbolofCaliforniasavagery，snarlingattheapproachingtypeofhighandprogressivecivilization，thefirstOverlandlocomotive！Ijustthinkthatwasnothinglessthananinspiration。——[The"bear"wasthatwhichhasalwaysappearedontheOverlandcover；the"twolines"formedarailwaytrackunderhisfeet。Clemens’soriginallettercontainedcrudesketchesillustratingthesethings。]

AmongtheBostongroupwasanotherCalifornian，RalphKeeler，aneccentric，gifted，andaltogethercharmingfellow，whomClemenshadknownonthePacificslope。KeelerhadbeenadoptedbytheBostonwriters，andwasgratefulandhappyaccordingly。Hewaspoorofpurse，butinexhaustiblyrichinthehappiergiftsoffortune。Hewasunfailinglybuoyant，light—hearted，andhopeful。Onaninfinitesimalcapitalhehadmadeatourofmanylands，andhadwrittenofitfortheAtlantic。Inthatcharmedcirclehewasasoverflowinglyhappyasifhehadbeenadmittedtothecompanyofthegods。Keelerwasaffectionatelyregardedbyallwhoknewhim，andheofferedasortofworshipinreturn。HeoftenaccompaniedMarkTwainonhislectureengagementstothevariousoutlyingtowns，andClemensbroughthimbacktohishotelforbreakfast，wheretheyhadgood，enjoyabletalkstogether。OnceKeelercameeagerlytothehotelandmadehiswayuptoClemens’sroom。

"Comewithme，"hesaid。"Quick！"

"Whatisit？What’shappened？"

"Don’twaittotalk。Comewithme。"

Theytrampedbrisklythroughthestreetstilltheyreachedthepubliclibrary，entered，Keelerleadingtheway，notstoppingtillhefacedarowofshelvesfilledwithbooks。Hepointedatoneofthem，hisfaceradiantwithjoy。

"Look，"hesaid。"Doyouseeit？"

Clemenslookedcarefullynowandidentifiedoneofthebooksasastill—

bornnovelwhichKeelerhadpublished。

"Thisisalibrary，"saidKeeler，eagerly，"andthey’vegotit！"

Hiswholebeingwasaglowwiththewonderofit。Hehadbeeninvestigating；thelibraryrecordsshowedthatinthetwoyearsthebookhadbeenthereithadbeentakenoutandreadthreetimes！ItneveroccurredtoClemenseventosmile。KnowingMarkTwain，onewouldguessthathiseyeswerelikelytobefilledwithtears。

InhisbookaboutMarkTwain，HowellstellsofaluncheonwhichKeelergavetohismorefamousassociates——Aldrich，Fields，Harte，Clemens，andHowellshimself——amerryinformaloccasion。SaysHowells：

Nothingremainstomeofthehappytimebutasenseofidleandaimlessandjoyfultalk——play，beginningandendingnowhere，ofeagerlaughter，ofcountlessgoodstoriesfromFields，ofaheat—

lightningshimmerofwitfromAldrich，ofanoccasionalconcentrationofourjointmockeriesuponourhost，whotookitgladly；andamidthediscourse，solittleimproving，butsofullofgood—fellowship，BretHarte’s(leeringdramatizationofClemens’smentalattitudetowardasymposiumofBostonilluminates。"Why，fellows，"hespluttered，"thisisthedreamofMark’slife，"andI

remembertheglancefromunderClemens’sfeatheryeyebrowswhichbetrayedhisenjoymentofthefun。

VerylikelyKeelergavethatluncheonincelebrationofhisbook’striumph；itwouldbelikehim。

Keeler’sendwasamystery。TheNewYorkTribunecommissionedhimtogotoCubatoreportthefactsofsomeSpanishoutrages。HesailedfromNewYorkinthesteamer，andwaslastseenalivethenightbeforethevesselreachedHavana。Hehadmadenosecretofhismission，buthaddiscusseditinhisfrank，innocentway。ThereweresomeSpanishmilitarymenontheship。

Clemens，commentingonthematter，oncesaid：

"Itmaybethathewasnotflungintothesea，stillthebeliefwasgeneralthatthatwaswhathadhappened。"

InhisbookHowellsreferstothedoubtwithwhichMarkTwainwasthenreceivedbythepolitecultureofBoston；which，ontheotherhand，acceptedBretHarteasoneofitsown，forgivingevensocialshortcomings。

Thereasonisnotdifficulttounderstand。Hartehadmadehisappealwithlegitimatefictionofthekindwhich，howeverfreshinflavorandenvironment，wasofasorttobemeasuredandclassified。Hartespokealanguagetheycouldunderstand；hishumor，hispathos，hispointofviewwereallrecognizable。Itwasanartalreadystandardizedbyamaster。

ItisnoreflectiononthegeniusofBretHartetolikenhissplendidachievementstothoseofCharlesDickens。MuchofHarte’sworkisinnowayinferiortothatofhisgreatEnglishprototype。Dickensneverwroteabettershortstorythan"TheOutcastsofPokerFlats。"Heneverwroteasgoodashortstoryas"TheLuckofRoaringCamp。"BostoncriticspromptlyrealizedthesethingsandgaveHartehiscorrectrating。ThattheyfailedtodothiswithMarkTwain，laychieflyinthefactthathespoketotheminnewandstartlingtongues。Hisgospelswerelikelytobeheresies；hisliteraryeccentricitieswereallunclassified。OftheultrafastidioussetHowellstellsusthatCharlesEliotNortonandProf。

FrancisJ。Childwereabouttheonlyoneswhoaccordedhimunqualifiedapproval。Theotherssmiledandenjoyedhim，butwiththatcondescensionwhichthecourtierislikelytoaccordtomotleyandthecapandbells。

Onlythegreat，simple—hearted，unbiasedmultitude，thepublic，whichhadnostandardsbutthedirectappealfromonehumanhearttoanother，couldrecognizeimmediatelyhismightierheritage，couldexaltandplacehimonthethrone。

LXXXIV

"ROUGHINGIT"

TelegramtoRedpath：

HowinthenameofGoddoesamanfindhiswayfromheretoAmherst，andwhenmusthestart？Givemefullparticulars，andsendamanwithme。IfIhadanotherengagementIwouldrotbeforeIwouldfillit。S。L。CLEMENS。

ThiswasattheendofFebruary，andhebelievedthathewasstandingontheplatformforthelasttime。Heloathedthedrudgeryofthework，andheconsideredtherewasnofurtherneed。Hewasnolongerindebt，andhisincomeheaccountedample。Hisnewbook，’RoughingIt’，——[ItwasBlisswhohadgiventhenewbookthetleofRoughingIt。InnocentsatHomehadbeenitsprovisiontitle，certainlyamisleadingone，thoughithasbeenretainedinEnglandforthesecondvolume；forwhatreasonitwouldbedifficulttoexplain。]——hadhadalargeadvancesale，anditsearningspromisedtorivalthoseofthe’Innocents’。Heresolvedinthefuturetoconfinehimselftothetradeandprofitsofauthorship。

Thenewbookhadadvantagesinitsfavor。Issuedearlyintheyear，itwasofferedatthebestcanvassingseason；particularlyso，astheauthor’slectureshadpreparedthepublicforitsreception。

Furthermore，itdealtwiththemostpicturesquephasesofAmericanlife，scenesandepisodesvastlyinterestingatthattime，andpeculiarlyadaptedtoMarkTwain’sliteraryexpression。Inadifferentway’RoughingIt’isquiteasremarkableas’TheInnocentsAbroad。’Ifithaslesscharm，ithasgreaterinterest，anditisbynomeanswithoutcharm。Thereissomethingdelicious，forinstance，inthisbitofpureenjoymentofthefirstday’soverlandtravel：

Itwasnowjustdawn，andaswestretchedourcrampedlegsfulllengthonthemail—sacks，andgazedoutthroughthewindowsacrossthewidewastesofgreenswardcladincool，powderymisttowheretherewasanexpectantlookintheEasternhorizon，ourperfectenjoymenttooktheformofatranquilandcontentedecstasy。Thestagewhirledalongataspankinggait，thebreezeflappingthecurtainsandsuspendedcoatsinamostexhilaratingway；thecradleswayedandswungluxuriously，thepatteringofthehorses’hoofs，thecrackingofthedriver’swhip，andhis"Hi—yi！g’lang！"weremusic；thespinninggroundandthewaltzingtreesappearedtogiveusamutehurrahaswewentby，andthenslackupandlookafteruswithinterestandenvy，orsomething；andaswelayandsmokedthepipeofpeace，andcomparedallthisluxurywiththeyearsoftiresomecitylifethathadgonebeforeit，wefeltthattherewasonlyonecompleteandsatisfyinghappinessintheworld，andwehadfoundit。

Also，thereisthatloftypresentationofSouthPass，andapictureofthealkalidesert，soparching，sowitheringinitschokingrealism，thatitmakesthethroatacheandthetonguedrytoreadit。Justabitofthedesertinpassing：

Thesunbeatsdownwithadead，blistering，relentlessmalignity；

theperspirationiswellingfromeveryporeinmanandbeast，butscarcelyasignofitfindsitswaytothesurface——itisabsorbedbeforeitgetsthere；thereisnotthefaintestbreathofairstirring；thereisnotamercifulshredofcloudinallthebrilliantfirmament；thereisnotalivingcreaturevisibleinanydirectionwhitheronesearchestheblanklevelthatstretchesitsmonotonousmilesoneveryhand；thereisnotasound，notasigh，notawhisper，notabuzz，orawhirofwings，ordistantpipeofbird；notevenasobfromthelostsoulsthatdoubtlesspeoplethatdeadair。

Asforthehumorofthebook，ithasbeenchieflyfamousforthat。"BuckFanshaw’sFuneral"hasbecomeaclassic，andthepurchaseofthe"MexicanPlug。"Butitistonopurposetoreviewthebookhereindetail。Wehavealreadyreviewedthelifeandenvironmentoutofwhichitgrew。

Withoutdoubtthestorywouldhavecontainedmoreofthepoeticandcontemplative，inwhichhewasalwaysathisbest，ifthesubjectitself，asintheInnocents，hadlentitselfoftenertothisformofwriting。Itwasthelackofthathaloperhapswhichcausedthenewbookneverquitetorankwithitsgreatforerunnerinpublicfavor。Therecouldhardlybeanyotherreason。Itpresentedafreshertheme；itaboundedinhumor；

technically，itwasbetterwritten；seeminglyithadalltheelementsofpopularityandofpermanence。Itdid，infact，possessthesequalities，butitssales，exceptduringtheearliermonthsofitscanvass，neverquiteequaledthoseofTheInnocentsAbroad。

’RoughingIt’wasacceptedbythepublicforjustwhatitwasandis，agreatpictureoftheOverlandPioneerdays——amarvelouspictureoffrontieraspectsatatimewhenthefrontieritself，evenwithitshardshipsanditstragedies，waslittlemorethanavastprimaljoke；

whenallfrontiersmenwereobligedtobelaughingphilosophersinordertosurvivethestressofitswarfares。

AwordhereaboutthisWesternhumor：Itisadistinctproduct。Itgrewoutofadistinctcondition——thebattlewiththefrontier。Thefightwassodesperate，totakeitseriouslywastosurrender。Womenlaughedthattheymightnotweep；men，whentheycouldnolongerswear。"Westernhumor"wastheresult。Itisthefreshest，wildesthumorintheworld，butthereistragedybehindit。

’RoughingIt’presentedthepictureofthoseearlyconditionswiththestartlingvividnessandtruthofagreatnovel，which，ineffect，itwas。

Itwasnotaccuratehistory，evenoftheauthor’sownadventures。Itwastrueinitsaspects，ratherthaninitsdetails。Thegreaterartistdisregardsthetruthofdetailtorendermorestrikinglyaphaseoracondition，toproduceanatmosphere，toreconstructavanishedtime。

ThiswaswhatMarkTwaindidin’RoughingIt’。Hetoldthestoryofoverlandtravelandthefrontier，forhisownandfuturegenerations，inwhatisessentiallyapicaresquenovel，aworkofunperishingfiction，foundedonfact。

Thesalesof’RoughingIt’duringthefirstthreemonthsaggregatednearlyfortythousandcopies，andtheauthorwaslavishlyelateaccordingly。ToOrion(whohadalreadyclosedhiscareerwithBliss，byexerciseofthosehereditaryeccentricitiesthroughwhichhesooftencametogrief)hegave$1，000outofthefirstroyaltycheck，inacknowledgmentofthememorandumbookandotherdatawhichOrionhadsupplied。Clemensbelievedthenewbookwouldsellonehundredthousandcopieswithintheyear；butthesalediminishedpresently，andattheendofthefirstyearitwasconsiderablybehindtheInnocentsforthesameperiod。Asalreadystated，itrequiredtenyearsforRoughingIttoreachtheone—hundred—thousandmark，whichtheInnocentsreachedinthree。

LXXXV

ABIRTH，ADEATH，ANDAVOYAGE

Theyear1872wasaneventfuloneinMarkTwain’slife。AtElmira，onMarch19th，hissecondchild，alittlegirl，whomtheynamedSusanOlivia，wasborn。OnJune2d，inthenewhomeinHartford，towhichtheyhadrecentlymoved，hisfirstchild，alittleboy，Langdon，died。Hehadneverbeenstrong，hiswaveringlifehadoftenbeenuncertain，alwaysmoreofthespiritthanthebody，andinElmirahecontractedaheavycold，orperhapsitwasdiphtheriafromthebeginning。Inlateryears，wheneverClemensspokeofthelittlefellow，heneverfailedtoaccusehimselfofhavingbeenthecauseofthechild’sdeath。ItwasMrs。

Clemens’scustomtodriveouteachmorningwithLangdon，andoncewhenshewasunabletogoClemenshimselfwentinstead。

"Ishouldnothavebeenpermittedtodoit，"hesaid，remembering。

"Iwasnotqualifiedforanysuchresponsibilityasthat。Someoneshouldhavegonewhohadatleasttherudimentsofamind。NecessarilyIwouldlosemyselfdreaming。Afterawhilethecoachmanlookedaroundandnoticedthatthecarriage—robeshaddroppedawayfromthelittlefellow，andthathewasexposedtothechillyair。Hecalledmyattentiontoit，butitwastoolate。Tonsilitisorsomethingofthesortsetin，andhedidnotgetanybetter，sowetookhimtoHartford。

Thereitwaspronounceddiphtheria，andofcoursehedied。"

So，withorwithoutreason，headdedtheblameofanothertragedytotheheavyburdenofremorsewhichhewouldgoonpilingupwhilehelived。

TheblowwasaterribleonetoMrs。Clemens；eventhecomfortofthelittlenewbabyonherarmcouldnoteasetheacheinherbreast。Itseemedtoherthatdeathwaspursuingher。Inoneofherlettersshesays：

"Ifeelsooftenasifmypathistobelinedwithgraves，"andsheexpressesthewishthatshemaydropoutoflifeherselfbeforehersisterandherhusband——awishwhichtheyearswouldgrant。

TheydidnotreturntoElmira，foritwasthoughtthattheairoftheshorewouldbebetterforthelittlegirl；sotheyspentthesummeratSaybrook，Connecticut，atFenwickHall，leavingOrionandhiswifeinchargeofthehouseatHartford。

Beyondafewsketches，Clemensdidverylittleliteraryworkthatsummer，butheplannedatriptoEurope，andheinventedwhatisstillknownandsoldasthe"MarkTwainScrap—Book。"

HewrotetoOrionofhisproposedtriptoEngland，anddilateduponhisscrap—bookwithconsiderableenthusiasm。Theideahadgrownoutoftheinconvenienceoffindingapaste—jar，andthegeneralmussinessofscrap—

bookkeeping。Hisnewplanwasaself—pastingscrap—bookwiththegumlaidoninnarrowstrips，requiringonlytobedampenedwithaspongeorothermoistsubstancetobereadyfortheclipping。HestatesthatheintendstoputtheinventionintothehandsofSlote，Woodman&Co。，ofwhomDanSlote，hisoldQuakerCityroom—mate，wastheseniorpartner，andhaveitmanufacturedforthetrade。

AboutthistimebeganMarkTwain’slongandactiveinterestincopyright。

Previouslyhehadnotmuchconsideredthesubject；hehadtakenitforgrantedtherewasnostepthathecouldtake，whileinternationalpiracywasarecognizedinstitution。Onbothsidesofthewaterbookswereappropriated，oftenwithoutprofit，sometimesevenwithoutcredit，totheauthor。Totellthetruth，ClemenshadatfirstregardeditratherinthenatureofacomplimentthathisbooksshouldbethoughtworthpiratinginEngland，butastimepassedherealizedthathewaspayingheavilyforthisrecognition。Furthermore，hedecidedthathewasforfeitingaright；ratherthathewasbeingdeprivedofit：somethingwhichitwasinhisnaturetoresent。

When’RoughingIt’hadbeenreadyforissueheagreedwithBlissthattheyshouldtrytheexperimentofcopyrightingitinEngland，andseehowfarthelawwouldprotectthemagainstthevoraciouslittlepublisher，whothusfarhadnotonlysnappedupeverythingbearingMarkTwain’ssignature，buthadincludedinavolumeofMarkTwainsketchescertainexamplesofveryweakhumorwithwhichMarkTwainhadbeenpreviouslyunfamiliar。

WhatevertheEnglishpirate’sopinionofthecopyrightprotectionof’RoughingIt’mayhavebeen，hedidnotattempttoviolateit。Thiswasgratifying。ClemenscametoregardEnglandasafriendlypower。Hedecidedtovisititandspyouttheland。Hewouldmaketheacquaintanceofitspeopleandinstitutionsandwriteabook，whichwoulddothesethingsjustice。

Hegaveoutnowordofhisrealpurpose。HemerelysaidthathewasgoingovertoseehisEnglishpublishers，andperhapstoarrangeforafewlectures。Heprovidedhimselfwithsomestylographicnote—books，bywhichhecouldproducetwocopiesofhisdailymemoranda——oneforhimselfandonetomailtoMrs。Clemens——andsailedontheScotiaAugust21，1872。

ArrivinginLiverpoolhetooktrainforLondon，andpresentlythewonderfulcharmofthatold，finishedcountrybrokeuponhim。His"firsthourinEnglandwasanhourofdelight，"herecords；"ofraptureandecstasy。ThesearethebestwordsIcanfind，buttheyarenotadequate；

theyarenotstrongenoughtoconveythefeelingwhichthisfirstvisionofruralEnglandbroughtme。"Thenhenoticedthatthegentlemanoppositeinhiscompartmentpaidnoattentiontothescenery，butwasabsorbedinagreen—coveredvolume。Hewassoabsorbedinitthat，byandby，Clemens’scuriositywasaroused。Heshiftedhispositionalittleandhiseyecaughtthetitle。ItwasthefirstvolumeoftheEnglisheditionofTheInnocentsAbroad。Thiswasgratifyingforamoment；thenherememberedthatthemanhadneverlaughed，neverevensmiledduringthehourofhissteadyreading。ClemensrecalledwhathehadheardoftheEnglishlackofhumor。Hewonderedifthiswasafairexampleofit，andifthemancouldbereallytakingseriouslyeverywordhewasreading。Clemenscouldnotlookatthesceneryanymoreforwatchinghisfellow—passenger，waitingwithafascinatedinterestfortheparagraphthatwouldbreakupthatiron—cladsolemnity。Itdidnotcome。

DuringalltherestofthetriptoLondontheatmosphereofthecompartmentremainedheavywithgloom。

HedrovetotheLanghamHotel，alwayspopularwithAmericans，establishedhimself，andwenttolookuphispublishers。HefoundtheRoutledgesabouttositdowntoluncheoninaprivateroom，up—stairs，intheirpublishinghouse。Hejoinedthem，andnotasoulstirredfromthattableagainuntilevening。TheRoutledgeshadneverheardMarkTwaintalkbefore，neverheardanyonetalkwhointheleastresembledhim。Variousrefreshmentswereservedduringtheafternoon，cameandwent，whilethismarvelouscreaturetalkedonandtheylistened，reveling，andwonderingifAmericahadanymoreofthatsortathome。Byandbydinnerwasserved；thenafteralongtime，whentherewasnofurtherexcuseforkeepinghimthere，theytookhimtotheSavageClub，wheretherewereyetotherrefreshmentsandagatheringoftheclanstowelcomethisnewarrivalasabeingfromsomeremoteandunfamiliarstar。

TomHood，theyounger，wasthere，andHarryLee，andStanleytheexplorer，whohadbutjustreturnedfromfindingLivingstone，andHenryIrving，andmanyanotherwhosenameremains，thoughtheownersofthosenamesarealldeadnow，andtheirlaughterandtheirgood—fellowshipareonlyapartofthatintangiblefabricwhichwecallthepast。’——[ClemenshadfirstknownStanleyasanewspaperman。"IfirstmethimwhenhereportedalectureofmineinSt。Louis，"hesaidonceinaconversationwherethenameofStanleywasmentioned。]

LXXXVI

ENGLAND

>FromthatnightMarkTwain’sstayinEnglandcouldnotproperlybecalledagloomyone。

Routledge，Hood，Lee，and，infact，allliteraryLondon，setthemselvesthetaskofgivinghimagoodtime。Whateverplaceofinteresttheycouldthinkofhewastakenthere；whatevertherewastoseehesawit。

Dinners，receptions，andassemblieswerenotcompletewithouthim。TheWhiteFriars’Clubandothersgavebanquetsinhishonor。Hewasthesensationoftheday。Whenherosetospeakontheseoccasionshewasgreetedwithwildcheers。Whateverhesaidtheyeagerlyapplauded——tooeagerlysometimes，inthefearthattheymightberegardedasinsensibletoAmericanhumor。Otherspeakersdelightedinchaffinghiminordertoprovokehisretorts。WhenaspeakerhumorouslyreferredtohisAmericanhabitofcarryingacottonumbrella，hisreplythathefollowedthiscustombecauseacottonumbrellawastheonlykindofanumbrellathatanEnglishmanwouldn’tsteal，wasalloverEnglandnextday，andregardedasoneofthefinestexamplesofwitsincethedaysofSwift。

ThesuddennessandcompletenessofhisacceptancebythegreatonesofLondonratheroverwhelmedandfrightenedhimmadehimtimid。JoaquinMillerwrites：

Hewasshyasagirl，althoughtimewasalreadycoylyflirtingwhiteflowersathistemples，andcouldhardlybecoaxedtomeetthelearnedandgreatwhowantedtotakehimbythehand。

Manycametocallonhimathishotel，amongthemCharlesReadeandCanonKingsley。Kingsleycametwicewithoutfindinghim；thenwrote，askingforanappointment。Readeinvitedhisassistanceonanovel。Indeed，itwasinEnglandthatMarkTwainwasfirstmadetofeelthathehadcomeintohisrightfulheritage。WhatevermayhavebeenthedoubtsconcerninghiminAmerica，therewasnoquestioninEngland。Howellssays：

InEnglandrank，fashion，andculturerejoicedinhim。Lordmayors，lordchiefjustices，andmagnatesofmanykindswerehishosts；hewasdesiredincountryhouses，andhisboldgeniuscaptivatedthefavorofperiodicalswhichspurnedtherestofournation。

AfterthatfirstvisitofMarkTwain’s，whenAmericansinEngland，referringtotheirgreatstatesmen，authors，andthelike，naturallymentionedthenamesofSeward，Webster，Lowell，orHolmes，theEnglishcommentwaslikelytobe："Nevermindthose。WecanturnoutacademicSewardsbythedozen，andculturedhumoristslikeLowellandHolmesbythescore。TellusofLincoln，ArtemusWard，andMarkTwain。Wecannotmatchthese；theyinterestus。"Anditwastrue。Historycouldnotmatchthem，fortheywereunique。

Clemenswouldhavebeenmorethanhumanifintimehehadnotrealizedthefullermeaningofthistriumph，andexultedinitalittletothefolksathome。Thereneverlivedamoremodest，lesspretentious，lessaggressivemanthanMarkTwain，butthereneverlivedamanwhotookamorechildlikedelightingenuineappreciation；and，beingchildlike，itwasonlyhumanthatheshouldwishthosenearesttohimtosharehishappiness。Afteronememorableaffairhewrote：

Ihavebeenreceivedinasortoftremendouswayto—nightbythebrainsofLondon，assembledattheannualdinnerofthesheriffsofLondon；minebeing(betweenyouandme)anamewhichwasreceivedwithathunderingoutburstofspontaneousapplausewhenthelonglistofguestswascalled。

Imighthaveperishedonthespotbutforthefriendlysupportandassistanceofmyexcellentfriend，SirJohnBennett。

Thisletterdoesnottellalloftheincidentortherealreasonwhyhemighthaveperishedonthespot。Duringthelongroll—callofguestshehadlostinterestalittle，andwasconversinginwhisperswithhis"excellentfriend，"SirJohnBennett，stoppingtoapplaudnowandthenwhentheapplauseoftheothersindicatedthatsomedistinguishednamehadbeenpronounced。Allatoncetheapplausebrokeoutwithgreatvehemence。Thismustbesomeverydistinguishedpersonindeed。Hejoinedinitwithgreatenthusiasm。WhenitwasoverhewhisperedtoSirJohn：

"Whosenamewasthatwewerejustapplauding？"

"MarkTwain’s。"

Whereuponthesupportwasneeded。

PoorlittlepirateHottendidnothaveahappytimeduringthisvisit。

Hehadreveledintheprospectatfirst，forheanticipatedalargeincreasetobederivedfromhispurloinedproperty；butsuddenly，onemorning，hewasaghasttofindintheSpectatorasignedletterfromMarkTwain，inwhichhewasrepudiated，referredtoas"JohnCamdenHottentot，"anunsavorypersongenerally。HottenalsosentalettertotheSpectator，inwhichheattemptedtojustifyhimself，butitwasafeebleperformance。Clemenspreparedtwoothercommunications，eachworsethantheotherandbothmoredestructivethanthefirstone。Butthesewereonlytorelievehismind。Hedidnotprintthem。InoneofthemhepursuedthefancyofJohnCamdenHottentot，whomheoffersasaspecimentotheZoologicalGardens。

Itisnotabird。Itisnotaman。Itisnotafish。Itdoesnotseemtobeinallrespectsareptile。Ithasthebodyandfeaturesofaman，butscarcelyanyoftheinstinctsthatbelongtosuchastructure……I

amsurethatthissingularlittlecreatureisthemissinglinkbetweenthemanandthehyena。

HottenhadpreyeduponexplorerStanleyandlibeledhiminaso—called。

biographytoadegreethathadreallyarousedsomefeelingagainstStanleyinEngland。Onlyforthemoment——theQueeninvitedStanleytoluncheon，andnewspapercriticismceased。Hottenwasingeneraldisrepute，therefore，soitwasnotworthwhilethrowingasecondbrickathim。

Infact，nowthatClemenshadexpendedhisvenom，onpaper，Hottenseemedtohimratheranamusingfigurethanotherwise。Anincidentgrewoutofitall，however，thatwasnotamusing。E。P。Hingston，whomthereadermayrememberashavingbeenwithArtemusWardinVirginiaCity，andoneofthathappygroupthatwinedanddinedtheyearaway，hadbeenengagedbyHottentowritetheintroductorytohiseditionofTheInnocentsAbroad。Itwasawell—written，highlycomplimentaryappreciation。

Hingstondidnotdreamthathewascommittinganoffense，nordidClemenshimselfregarditassuchinthebeginning。

ButMarkTwain’sviewshadundergonearadicalchange，andwithcharacteristicdismissalofpreviousconditionshehadforgottenthathehadeverhadanyotherviewsthanthosehenowheld。HingstonwasinLondon，andoneevening，atagathering，approachedClemenswithoutstretchedhand。ButClemensfailedtoseeHingston’shandortorecognizehim。Inafter—yearshisconsciencehurthimterriblyforthis。

Heremembereditonlywithremorseandshame。Once，inhisoldage，hespokeofitwithdeepsorrow。

LXXXVII

THEBOOKTHATWASNEVERWRITTEN

ThebookonEngland，whichhehadpreparedforsocarefully，wasneverwritten。Hundredsofthestylographicpageswerefilled，andtheduplicatessenthomefortheentertainmentofOliviaClemens，butthenoteswerenotcompleted，andtheactualwritingwasneverbegun。TherewastoomuchsociabilityinLondonforonething，andthenhefoundthathecouldnotwriteentertaininglyofEnglandwithoutintroducingtoomanypersonalities，andrunningtheriskofoffendingthosewhohadtakenhimintotheirheartsandhomes。Inaword，hewouldhavetowritetooseriouslyornotatall。

Hebeganhismemorandaindustriouslyenough，andthevolumemighthavebeenascharmingandasvaluableasanyhehasleftbehind。Thereaderwillhardlyfailtofindafewoftheentriesinteresting。Theyareofferedhereasexamplesofhisdailyobservationduringthoseearlyweeksofhisstay，andtoshowsomewhatofhispurpose：

ANEXPATRIATE

TherewasonceanAmericanthiefwhofledhiscountryandtookrefugeinEngland。HedressedhimselfafterthefashionoftheLondoners，andtaughthistonguethepeculiaritiesoftheLondonpronunciationanddidhisbestinallwaystopasshimselfforanative。Buthedidtwofatalthings：hestoppedattheLanghamHotel，andthefirsttriphetookwastovisitStratford—on—AvonandthegraveofShakespeare。Thesethingsbetrayedhisnationality。

STANLEYANDTHEQUEEN

Seethepoweramonarchwields！WhenIarrivedhere，twoweeksago，thepapersandgeographerswereinafairwaytoeatpoorStanleyupwithoutsaltorsauce。TheQueensays，"ComefourhundredmilesupintoScotlandandsitatmyluncheon—tablefifteenminutes"；which，beingtranslated，means，"Gentlemen，Ibelieveinthismanandtakehimundermyprotection"；andnotanotheryelpisheard。

ATTHEBRITISHMUSEUM

Whataplaceitis！

Mentionsomeveryrarecuriosityofapeculiarnature——asomethingwhichyouhavereadaboutsomewherebutneverseen——theyshowyouadozen！Theyshowyouallthepossiblevarietiesofthatthing！

Theyshowyoucuriouslywroughtjewelednecklacesofbeatengold，wornbytheancientEgyptians，Assyrians，Etruscans，Greeks，Britons——everypeopleoftheforgottenages，indeed。Theyshowyoutheornamentsofallthetribesandpeoplesthatliveoreverdidlive。ThentheyshowyouacasttakenfromCromwell’sfaceindeath；thenthevenerablevasethatoncecontainedtheashesofXerxes。

IamwonderfullythankfulfortheBritishMuseum。Nobodycomesbotheringaroundme——nobodyelbowsme——alltheroomandallthelightIwant，underthishugedome——nodisturbingnoises——andpeoplestandingreadytobringmeacopyofprettymuchanybookthateverwasprintedunderthesun——andifIchoosetogowanderingaboutthelongcorridorsandgalleriesofthegreatbuildingthesecretsofalltheearthandalltheagesaxelaidopentome。IamnotcapableofexpressingmygratitudefortheBritishMuseum——itseemsasifIdonotknowanybutlittlewordsandweakones。

WESTMINSTERABBEYBYNIGHT

Itwaspasteleveno’clockandIwasjustgoingtobed。Butthisfriendofminewasasreliableashewaseccentric，andsotherewasnotadoubtinmymindthathis"expedition"hadmeritinit。Iputonmycoatandbootsagain，andwedroveaway。

"Whereisit？Wherearewegoing？"

"Don’tworry。You’llsee。"

Hewasnotinclinedtotalk。SoIthoughtthismustbeaweightymatter。Mycuriositygrewwiththeminutes，butIkeptitmanfullyunderthesurface。Iwatchedthelamps，thesigns，thenumbersaswethundereddownthelongstreet。IamalwayslostinLondon，dayornight。Itwasverychilly，almostbleak。Peopleleanedagainstthegustyblastsasifitwerethedeadofwinter。Thecrowdsgrewthinnerandthinner，andthenoiseswaxedfaintandseemedfaraway。

Theskywasovercastandthreatening。Wedroveon，andstillon，tillIwonderedifwewereevergoingtostop。Atlastwepassedbyaspaciousbridgeandavastbuilding，andpresentlyenteredagateway，passedthroughasortoftunnel，andstoppedinacourtsurroundedbytheblackoutlinesofagreatedifice。Thenwealighted，walkedadozenstepsorso，andwaited。Inalittlewhilefootstepswereheard，amanemergedfromthedarkness，andwedroppedintohiswakewithoutsayinganything。Heledusunderanarchwayofmasonry，andfromthatintoaroomytunnel，throughatallirongate，whichhelockedbehindus。Wefollowedhimdownthistunnel，guidedmorebyhisfootstepsonthestoneflaggingthanbyanythingwecouldverydistinctlysee。Attheendofitwecametoanotherirongate，andourconductorstoppedthereandlitabull’s—eyelantern。Thenheunlockedthegate；andIwishedhehadoileditfirst，itgratedsodismally。Thegateswungopenandwestoodonthethresholdofwhatseemedalimitlessdomedandpillaredcavern，carvedoutofthesoliddarkness。Theconductorandmyfriendtookofftheirhatsreverently，andIdidlikewise。Forthemomentthatwestoodthustherewasnotasound，andthestillnessseemedtoaddtothesolemnityofthegloom。Ilookedmyinquiry！

"ItisthetombofthegreatdeadofEngland—WestminsterAbbey。"……

Wewereamongthetombs；oneveryhanddullshapesofmen，sitting，standing，orstooping，inspecteduscuriouslyoutofthedarkness——

reachedouttheirhandstowardus——someappealing，somebeckoning，somewarningusaway。Effigiestheywere——statuesoverthegraves；

buttheylookedhumanandnaturalinthemurkyshadows。Nowalittlehalf—grownblackandwhitecatsqueezedherselfthroughthebarsoftheirongateandcamepurringlovinglyaboutus，unawedbythetimeortheplace，unimpressedbythemarblepompthatsepulchersalineofmightydeadthatendswithagreatauthorofyesterdayandbeganwithascepteredmonarchawaybackinthedawnofhistory，morethantwelvehundredyearsago……

Mr。Wrightflashedhislanternfirstuponthisobjectandthenuponthat，andkeptuparunningcommentarythatshowedtherewasnothingaboutthevenerableAbbeythatwastrivialinhiseyesorvoidofinterest。Heisamaninauthority，beingsuperintendent，andhisdailybusinesskeepshimfamiliarwitheverynookandcornerofthegreatpile。Castingaluminousraynowhere，nowyonder，hewouldsay：

"ObservetheheightoftheAbbey——onehundredandthreefeettothebaseoftheroof；Imeasureditmyselftheotherday。Noticethebaseofthiscolumn——old，veryold——hundredsandhundredsofyears——

andhowwelltheyknewhowtobuildinthoseolddays！Noticeit——

everystoneislaidhorizontally；thatistosay，justasnaturelaiditoriginallyinthequarrynotsetupedgewise；inourdaysomepeoplesetthemonedge，andthenwonderwhytheysplitandflake。Architectscannotteachnatureanything。Letmeremovethismatting——itisputheretopreservethepavement；nowthereisabitofpavementthatissevenhundredyearsold；youcanseebythesescatteringclustersofcoloredmosaicshowbeautifulitwasbeforetimeandsacrilegiousidlersmarredit。Nowthere，intheborder，wasaninscription，oncesee，followthecircle—youcantraceitbytheornamentsthathavebeenpulledout——hereisanAandthereisanO，andyonderanotherA——allbeautifulOldEnglishcapitals；

thereisnotellingwhattheinscriptionwas——norecordleftnow。

Nowmovealonginthisdirection，ifyouplease。YonderiswhereoldKingSeberttheSaxonlieshismonumentistheoldestoneintheAbbey；Sebertdiedin616，——[Clemensprobablymisunderstoodthename。ItwasEthelbertwhodiedin616。ThenameSebertdoesnotappearinanySaxonannalsaccessibletotheauthor。]——andthat’sasmuch，astwelvehundredandfiftyyearsagothinkofit！Twelvehundredandfiftyyears！Nowyonderisthelastone——CharlesDickens——thereonthefloor，withthebrasslettersontheslab——andtothisdaythepeoplecomeandputflowersonit……ThereisGarrick’smonument；andAddison’s，andThackeray’sbust——andMacaulayliesthere。AndclosetoDickensandGarricklieSheridanandDr。Johnson——andhereisoldParr……

"ThatstonetherecoversCampbellthepoet。Herearenamesyouknowprettywell——Milton，andGraywhowrotetheElegy，andButlerwhowroteHudibras；andEdmundSpenser，andBenJonson——therearethreetabletstohimscatteredabouttheAbbey，andallgot’O，RareBenJonson’cutonthem。Youwerestandingononeofthemjustnowheisburiedstandingup。Thereusedtobeatraditionherethatexplainsit。ThestorygoesthathedidnotdareasktobeburiedintheAbbey，soheaskedKingJamesifhewouldmakehimapresentofeighteeninchesofEnglishground，andtheKingsaid’yes，’andaskedhimwherehewouldhaveit，andhesaidinWestminsterAbbey。

Well，theKingwouldn’tgobackonhisword，andsothereheis，sureenough—stooduponend。"

Thereadermayregretthattherearenotmoreoftheseentries，andthatthebookitselfwasneverwritten。Justwhenhegaveuptheprojectisnotrecorded。HewasurgedtolectureinLondon，butdeclined。ToMrs。

Clemens，inSeptember，hewrote：

Everybodysayslecture，lecture，lecture，butIhavenottheleastideaofdoingit；certainlynotatpresent。Mr。Dolby，whotookDickenstoAmerica，iscomingtotalkbusinesstomorrow，thoughIhavesenthimwordoncebeforethatIcan’tbehiredtotalkhere；becauseIhavenotimetospare。Thereistoomuchsociability；Idonotgetalongfastenoughwithwork。

InOctoberhedeclaredthathewasveryhomesick，andproposedthatMrs。

ClemensandSusiejoinhimatonceinLondon，unlessshewouldprefertohavehimcomehomeforthewinterandallofthemreturntoLondoninthespring。Soitislikelythatthebookwasnotthenabandoned。Hefeltthathisvisitwasbynomeansended；thatitwas，infact，onlyjustbegun，buthewantedtheoneshelovedmosttoshareitwithhim。Tohismotherandsister，inNovember，hewrote：

Icameheretotakenotesforabook，butIhaven’tdonemuchbutattenddinnersandmakespeeches。Ihavehadajollygoodtime，andIdohatetogoawayfromtheseEnglishfolks；theymakeastrangerfeelentirelyathome，andtheylaughsoeasilythatitisacomforttomakeafter—

dinnerspeecheshere。Ihavemadehundredsoffriends；andlastnight，inthecrushattheopeningofthenewGuildHallLibraryandMuseum，I

wassurprisedtomeetafamiliarfaceeveryotherstep。

AllhisimpressionsofEnglandhadbeenhappyones。HecoulddeliveragentlesatirenowandthenatcertainBritishinstitutions——certainLondonlocalitiesandfeatures——asinhisspeechattheSavageClub，——[September28，1872。ThisisprobablythemostcharacteristicspeechmadebyMarkTwainduringhisfirstLondonvisit；thereaderwillfinditinfullinAppendixL，attheendoflastvolume。]——buttakingthesnugislandasawhole，itspeople，itsinstitutions，itsfair，ruralaspects，hehadfoundinitonlydelight。ToMrs。Cranehewrote：

IfyouandTheodorewillcomeoverinthespringwithLivyandme，andspendthesummer，youshallseeacountrythatissobeautifulthatyouwillbeobligedtobelieveinfairy—land。Thereisnothinglikeitelsewhereontheglobe。YoushouldhaveaseasonticketandtravelupanddowneverydaybetweenLondonandOxfordandworshipnature。

AndTheodorecanbrowsewithmeamongdustyolddensthatlooknowastheylookedfivehundredyearsago；andpuzzleoverbooksintheBritishMuseumthatweremadebeforeChristwasborn；andinthecustomsoftheirpublicdinners，andtheceremoniesofeveryofficialact，andthedressesofathousanddignitaries，tracethespeechandmannersofallthecenturiesthathavedraggedtheirlaggingdecadesoverEnglandsincetheHeptarchyfellasunder。I

wouldagooddealratherlivehereifIcouldgettherestofyouover。

HesailedNovember12th，ontheBatavia，loadedwithChristmaspresentsforeverybody；jewelry，furs，laces；alsoapracticalsteam—engineforhisnamesake，SamMoffett。Half—wayacrosstheAtlantictheBataviaranintoahurricaneandwasbadlydamagedbyheavyseas，anddrivenfaroutofhercourse。Itwasaluckyeventonthewhole，forshefellinwithawater—loggedlumberbark，acompletewreck，withninesurvivingsailorsclingingtoherrigging。Inthemidstofthewildgalealifeboatwaslaunchedandtheperishingmenwererescued。ClemenspreparedagraphicreportofthematterfortheRoyalHumaneSociety，askingthatmedalsbeconferreduponthebraverescuers，adocumentthatwassignedbyhisfellow—passengersandobtainedforthemencompleterecognitionandwidecelebrity。Closing，thewritersaid：

Asmighthavebeenanticipated，ifIhavebeenofanyservicetowardrescuingthesenineshipwreckedhumanbeingsbystandingaroundthedeckinafuriousstorm，withoutanumbrella，keepinganeyeonthingsandseeingthattheyweredoneright，andyellingwheneveracheerseemedtobetheimportantthing，IamgladandIamsatisfied。Iasknoreward。Iwoulddoitagainunderthesamecircumstances。ButwhatIdopleadfor，earnestlyandsincerely，isthattheRoyalHumaneSocietywillrememberourcaptainandourlife—boatcrew，andinsorememberingthemincreasethehighhonorandesteeminwhichthesocietyisheldalloverthecivilizedworld。

TheBataviareachedNewYorkNovember26，1872。MarkTwainhadbeenabsentthreemonths，duringwhichhehadbeenbroughttoatleastapartialrealizationofwhathisworkmeanttohimandtomankind。

Anelectionhadtakenplaceduringhisabsence——anelectionwhichgratifiedhimdeeply，forithadresultedinthesecondpresidencyofGeneralGrantandinthedefeatofHoraceGreeley，whomheadmiredperhaps，butnotaspresidentialmaterial。ToThomasNast，whohadaidedveryeffectuallyinMr。Greeley’soverwhelmingdefeat，Clemenswrote：

Nast，youmorethananyothermanhavewonaprodigiousvictoryforGrant——Imean，rather，forcivilizationandprogress。Thosepicturesweresimplymarvelous，andifanymaninthelandhasarighttoholdhisheadupandbehonestlyproudofhisshareinthisyear’svasteventsthatmanisunquestionablyyourself。Wealldosincerelyhonoryou，andareproudofyou。

HoraceGreeley’speculiarabilitiesandeccentricitieswoncelebrityforhim，ratherthanvoters。MarkTwainoncesaidofhim：

"Hewasagreatman，anhonestman，andservedhis，countrywellandwasanhonortoit。Also，hewasagood—naturedman，butabruptwithstrangersiftheyannoyedhimwhenhewasbusy。Hewasprofane，butthatisnothing；thebestofusisthat。Ididnotknowhimwell，butonlyjustcasually，andbyaccident。Inevermethimbutonce。IcalledonhimintheTribuneoffice，butIwasnotintendingto。IwaslookingforWhitelawReid，andgotintothewrongden。Hewasaloneathisdesk，writing，andweconversed——notlong，butjustalittle。Iaskedhimifhewaswell，andhesaid，’Whatthehelldoyouwant？’Well，Icouldn’trememberwhatIwanted，soIsaidIwouldcallagain。ButIdidn’t。"

Clemensdidnotalwaystelltheincidentjustinthisway。SometimesitwasJohnHayhewaslookingforinsteadofReid，andtheconversationwithGreeleyvaried；butperhapstherewasagermofhistoryunderitsomewhere，andatanyrateitcouldhavehappenedwellenough，andnothavebeenoutofcharacterwitheitherofthemen。

LXXXVIII

THEGILDEDAGE"

MarkTwaindidnotgoonthelecturecircuitthatwinter。Redpathhadbesoughthimasusual，andeveninmidsummerhadwritten：

"Willyou？Won’tyou？Wehaveseventhousandtoeightthousanddollarsinengagementsrecordedforyou，"andhenamedalistoftownsranginggeographicallyfromBostontoSt。Paul。

ButClemenshadnointentionthenofeverlecturinganymore，andagaininNovember，fromLondon，heannounced(toRedpath)：

"WhenIyellagainforlessthan$500I’llbeprettyhungry，butI

haven’tanyintentionofyellingatanyprice。"

Redpathpursuedhim，andinJanuaryproposed$400forasinglenightinPhiladelphia，butwithoutresult。HedidlecturetwonightsinSteinwayHallfortheMercantileLibraryAssociation，onthebasisofhalfprofits，netting$1，300forthetwonightsashisshare；andhelecturedonenightinHartford，ataprofitOf$1，500，forcharity。FatherHawley，ofHartford，hadannouncedthathismissionaryworkwassufferingforlackoffunds。Someofhispeoplewereactuallywithoutfood，hesaid，theirchildrencryingwithhunger。NooneeverrespondedtoanappeallikethatquickerthanSamuelClemens。Heofferedtodeliveralecturefree，andtobearanequalproportionofwhateverexpenseswereincurredbythecommitteeofeightwhoagreedtojoininforwardingtheproject。HegavetheSandwichIslandlecture，andatthecloseofitalargecardwashandedhimwiththefiguresofthereceiptsprinteduponit。Itwashelduptoview，andthehousebrokeintoastormofcheers。

Hedidverylittlewritingduringtheearlyweeksfollowinghisreturn。

Earlyintheyear(January3and6，1873)hecontributedtwoSandwichIslandletterstotheTribune，inwhich，inhisownpeculiarfashion，heurgedannexation。

"Wemustannexthosepeople，"hedeclared，andproceededtospecifytheblessingswecouldgivethem，suchas"leather—headedjuries，theinsanitylaw，andtheTweedRing。"

WecanconferWoodhullandClafinonthem，andGeorgeFrancisTrain。

Wecangivethemlecturers！Iwillgomyself。

Wecanmakethatlittlebunchofsleepyislandsthehottestcorneronearth，andarrayitinthemoralsplendorofourhighandholycivilization。Annexationiswhatthepoorislandersneed！

"Shallwe，tomenbenighted，thelampoflifedeny？"

HissuccessinEnglandbecameanincentivetocertainAmericaninstitutionstorecognizehisgiftsathome。EarlyintheyearhewasdinedastheguestoftheLotosClubofNewYork，andaweekortwolaterelectedtoitsmembership。Thiswasbutabeginning。Somenewmembershiporhonorwasofferedeverylittlewhile，andsomanybanquetsthathefinallyinventedasetformfordecliningthem。HewasnotyetrecognizedastheforemostAmericanmanofletters，butundoubtedlyhehadbecomethemostpopular；andEdwinWhipple，writingatthistime，orbutlittlelater，said：

"MarkTwainisregardedchieflyasahumorist，buttheexerciseofhisrealtalentswouldrankhimwiththeablestofourauthorsinthepastfiftyyears。"Sohewasbeginningtobe"discovered"inhighplaces。

ItwasduringthiswinterthattheClemenshouseholdenjoyeditsfirstrealhomelifeinHartford，itsfirstrealhomelifeanywheresincethoseearliestdaysofmarriage。TheHookermansionwasacomfortableplace。

Thelittlefamilyhadcomparativelygoodhealth。Theiroldfriendswerestanchandlavishlywarm—hearted，andtheyhadaddedmanynewones。

Theirfiresidewasadelightfulnucleusaroundwhichgatheredthosetheycaredformost，theTwichells，theWarnerfamilies，theTrumbulls——allcertainofawelcomethere。GeorgeWarner，onlyalittlewhileago，remembering，said：

"TheClemenshousewastheonlyoneIhaveeverknownwheretherewasneveranypreoccupationintheevenings，andwherevisitorswerealwayswelcome。Clemenswasthebestkindofahost；hiseveningsafterdinnerwereanunendingflowofstories。"

Friendslivingnearbyusuallycameandwentatwill，oftenwithouttheceremonyofknockingorformalleave—taking。Theyweremorelikeonegreatfamilyinthatneighborhood，withacommunityofinterests，aunityofideals。TheWarnerfamiliesandtheClemenseswereparticularlyintimate，andoutoftheirassociationgrewMarkTwain’snextimportantliteraryundertaking，hiscollaborationwithCharlesDudleyWarnerin’TheGildedAge’。

Anumberofmoreorlessabsurdstorieshavebeenprintedabouttheoriginofthisbook。Itwasaverysimplematter，aperfectlynaturaldevelopment。

Atthedinner—tableonenight，withtheWarnerspresent，criticismsofrecentnovelswereoffered，withtheusualfreedomandseverityofdinner—tabletalk。Thehusbandswereinclinedtotreatratherlightlythenovelsinwhichtheirwiveswerefindingentertainment。ThewivesnaturallyretortedthattheproperthingforthehusbandstodowastofurnishtheAmericanpeoplewithbetterones。Thiswasregardedinthenatureofachallenge，andassuchwasaccepted——mutuallyaccepted：thatistosay，inpartnership。OnthespurofthemomentClemensandWarneragreedthattheywoulddoanoveltogether，thattheywouldbeginitimmediately。Thisisthewholestoryofthebook’sorigin；sofar，atleast，asthecollaborationisconcerned。Clemens，infact，hadthebeginningofastoryinhismind，buthadbeenunwillingtoundertakeanextendedworkoffictionalone。Hewelcomedonlytooeagerly，therefore，thepropositionofjointauthorship。Hispurposewastowriteatalearoundthatlovablecharacterofhisyouth，hismother’scousin，JamesLampton——toletthatgentlevisionarystandasthecentralfigureagainstaproperbackground。TheideaappealedtoWarner，andtherewasnodelayinthebeginning。Clemensimmediatelysettoworkandcompleted399

pagesofthemanuscript，thefirstelevenchaptersofthebook，beforetheearlyflushofenthusiasmwaned。

Warnercameoverthen，andClemensreaditaloudtohim。Warnerhadsomeplansforthestory，andtookitupatthispoint，andcontinueditthroughthenexttwelvechapters；andsotheyworkedalternately，"inthesuperstition，"asMarkTwainlongafterwarddeclared，"thatwewerewritingonecoherentyarn，whenIsuppose，asamatteroffact，wewerewritingtwoincoherentones。"——[Thereadermaybeinterestedinthedivisionoflabor。ClemenswrotechaptersItoXI；alsochaptersXXIV，XXV，XXVII，XXVIII，XXX，XXXII，XXXIII，XXXIV，XXXVI，XXXVII，XLII，XLIII，XLV，LI，LII，LIII，LVII，LIX，LX，LXI，LXII，andportionsofchaptersXXXV，XLIX，LVI。WarnerwrotechaptersXIItoXXIII；alsochaptersXXVI，XXIX，XXXI，XXXVIII，XXXIX，XL，XLI，XLIV，XLVI，XLVII，XLVITT，L，LIV，LV，LVIII，LXIII，andportionsofchaptersXXXV，XLIX，andLVI。Theworkwasthereforeveryevenlydivided。

Therewasanotherco—workeronTheGildedAgebeforethebookwasfinallycompleted。ThiswasJ。HammondTrumbull，whopreparedthevariegated，marvelouscryptographicchapterheadings：TrumbullwasthemostlearnedmanthateverlivedinHartford。Hewasfamiliarwithallliteraryandscientificdata，andaccordingtoClemenscouldswearintwenty—sevenlanguages。ItwasthoughttobeachoiceideatogetTrumbulltosupplyalingualmedleyofquotationstoprecedethechaptersinthenewbook，thepurposebeingtoexciteinterestandpossiblytoamusethereader——apurposewhichtosomeextentappearstohavemiscarried。]

ThebookwasbeguninFebruaryandfinishedinApril，sotheworkdidnotlag。Theresult，ifnothighlyartistic，madeastonishinglygoodreading。Warnerhadthetouchofromance，Clemens，thegiftofcreating，oratleastofportraying，humanrealities。Mostofhischaractersreflectedintimatepersonalitiesofhisearlylife。BesidestheapotheosisofJamesLamptonintotheimmortalSellers，OrionbecameWashingtonHawkins，SquireClemensthejudge，whileMarkTwain’sownpersonality，inagreaterorlesserdegree，isreflectedinmostofhiscreations。AsfortheTennesseeland，solongawill—o’the—wispandabugbear，itbecametangiblepropertyatlast。OnlyayearortwobeforeClemenshadwrittentoOrion：

Oh，here！Idon’twanttobeconsultedatallaboutTennessee。I

don’twantitevenmentionedtome。WhenImakeasuggestionitisforyoutoactuponitorthrowitaside，butIbeseechyounevertoaskmyadvice，opinion，orconsentaboutthathatedproperty。

Butitcameingoodplaynow。Itistheimportantthemeofthestory。

MarkTwainwaswellqualifiedtoconstructhisshareofthetale。Heknewhischaracters，theirlives，andtheiratmospheresperfectly。

SenatorDilworthy(otherwiseSenatorPomeroy，ofKansas，thennotoriousforattemptedvote—buying)wasfamiliarenough。ThatwinterinWashingtonhadacquaintedClemenswiththelifethere，itspoliticalintrigues，andthedisreputeofCongress。Warnerwasequallywellqualifiedforhisshareoftheundertaking，andthechiefcriticismthatonemayofferistheonestatedbyClemenshimself——thatthedivisionsofthetaleremaindivisionsratherthanunity。

Asforthestoryitself——theromanceandtragedyofit——thecharacterofLaurainthehandsofeitherauthorisonenoteasytoforget。Whetherthismeansthattheworkiswelldone，oronlystrikinglydone，thereaderhimselfmustjudge。Morally，thecharacterisnotjustified。

Laurawasavictimofcircumstancefromthebeginning。Therecouldbenopoeticjusticeinherdoom。Todragheroutofasteamerwreck，onlytomakeherthevictimofascoundrel，lateranadventuress，andfinallyamurderess，allmaybegoodart，butofaverybadkind。LauraisasortofAmericanBeckySharp；butthereisretributivejusticeinBecky’sfate，whereasLaura’sdoomiswarrantedonlybytheauthor’swhim。Asforherend，whateverthevirtuouspublicofthatdaymighthavedone，apresent—dayaudiencewouldnothavepeltedherfromthestage，destroyedherfuture，takenawayherlife。

Theauthorsregardedtheirworkhighlywhenitwasfinished，butthatisnothing。Anyauthorregardshisworkhighlyatthemomentofitscompletion。Inlateryearsneitherofthemthoughtverywelloftheirproduction；butthatalsoisnothing。Theauthorseldomcaresverydeeplyforhisoffspringonceitisturnedovertothepubliccharge。

Thefactthatthestoryisstillpopular，stilldelightsthousandsofreaders，whenamyriadofnovelsthathavebeenwrittensinceitwascompletedhavelivedtheirlittledayanddiedsoutterlythateventheirnameshavepassedoutofmemory，isthebestverdictastoitsworth。

LXXXIX

PLANNINGANEWHOME

Clemensandhiswifeboughtalotforthenewhomethatwinter，afine，sightlypieceoflandonFarmingtonAvenue——table—land，slopingdowntoaprettystreamthatwoundthroughthewillowsandamongthetrees。Theywereasdelightedaschildrenwiththeirnewpurchaseandtheprospectofbuilding。TohersisterMrs。Clemenswrote：

Mr。Clemensseemstogloryinhissenseofpossession；hegoesdailyintothelot，hashadseveralfallstryingtolayoffthelandbyslidingaroundonhisfeet……

Forthreedaystheicehascoveredthetrees，andtheyhavebeenglorious。Wecoulddonothingbutwatchthebeautyoutside；ifyoulookedatthetreesasthesunstruckthem，withyourbacktowardthesun，theywerecoveredwithjewels。Ifyoulookedtowardthesunitwasallcrystalwhiteness，aperfectfairy—land。Thenthenightsweremoonlight，andthatwasagreatbeauty，themoongivingusthesameprismaticeffect。

ThiswasthestormofwhichMarkTwainwrotehismatchlessdescription，givenfirstinhisspeechonNewEnglandweather，andlaterpreservedin’FollowingtheEquator’，inmoreextendedform。Inthatbookhelikensanice—stormtohisimpressionsderivedfromreadingdescriptionsoftheTajMahal，thatwonderfultombofafairEastIndianqueen。Itisamarvelousbitofword—painting——hisdescriptionofthatmajesticvision：

"Wheneveryboughandtwigisstrungwithice—beads，frozendewdrops，andthewholetreesparklescoldandwhite，liketheShahofPersia’sdiamondplume。"Itwillpayanyonetolookupthatdescriptionandreaditall，thoughithasbeensaid，bythefortunateoneortwowhoheardhimfirstgiveitutteranceasanimpromptuoutburst，thatinthesubsequentprocessofwritingthebloomofitsoriginalmagnificencewaslost。

TheplansforthenewhouseweredrawnforthwithbythatgentlearchitectEdwardPotter，whoseartto—daymaybeconsideredopentocriticism，butnotbecauseofanylackoforiginality。Hartfordhousesofthatperiodweremainlyofthegoods—boxformofarchitecture，perfectlysquare，typifyingthecommercialpursuitsofmanyoftheirowners。Potteragreedtogetawayfromthisidea，andaradicalandevenfrenzieddeparturewastheresult。Certainlyhisplanspresentedbeautifulpictures，andallwhosawthemwerefilledwithwonderanddelight。Architecturehaslavisheditselfinmanyflorescentformssincethen，butwemayimaginethatPotter’s"Englishviolet"orderofdesign，ashehimselfdesignatedit，startled，dazzled，andcaptivatedinaday，whenmosthousesweremerehabitations，builtwithaviewtoeconomyandthelargestpossibleamountofroom。

Workmenwereputonthegroundwithoutdelay，toprepareforthebuilders，andworkwasrapidlypushedalong。TheninMaythewholematterwasleftinthehandsofthearchitectandthecarpenters(withLawyerCharlesE。PerkinstostandbetweenPotterandtheviolentbuilder，whoroaredatPotterandfrightenedhimwhenhewantedchanges)，whiletheClemenshousehold，withClaraSpaulding，agirlhoodfriendofMrs。Clemens，sailedawaytoEnglandforahalf—yearholiday。

XC

ALONGENGLISHHOLIDAY

TheysailedontheBatavia，andwiththemwentayoungmannamedThompson，atheologicalstudentwhomClemenshadconsentedtotakeasanamanuensis。Thereisapatheticincidentconnectedwiththisyoungman，anditmayaswellbesetdownhere。Clemensfound，afewweeksafterhisarrivalinEngland，thatsogreatwasthetaxuponhistimethathecouldmakenouseofThompson’sservices。HegaveThompsonfiftydollars，anduponthepossibilityoftheyoungman’sdesiringtoreturntoAmerica，advancedhimanotherfiftydollars，sayingthathecouldreturnitsomeday，andneverthoughtofitagain。Buttheyoungmanrememberedit，andoneday，thirty—sixyearslater，afteralifeofhardshipandstruggle，suchasthelifeofacountryministerisapttobe，hewroteandinclosedamoney—order，apaymentonhisdebt。ThatletteranditsinclosurebroughtonlysorrowtoMarkTwain。Hefeltthatitlaiduponhimtheaccumulatedburdenofthewearythirty—sixyears’

strugglewithill—fortune。Hereturnedthemoney，ofcourse，andinabiographicalnotecommented：

Howpalepaintedheroismsofromancelookbesideit！Thompson’sheroism，whichisreal，whichiscolossal，whichissublime，andwhichiscostlybeyondallestimate，isachievedinprofoundobscurity，anditsherowalksinragstotheendofhisdays。IhadforgottenThompsoncompletely，butheflashesbeforemeasvividlyaslightning。Icanseehimnow。ItwasonthedeckoftheBatavia，inthedock。Theshipwascastingoff，withthathubbubandconfusionandrushingofsailors，andshoutingofordersandshriekingofboatswainwhistles，whichmarkedthedeparturepreparationsinthosedays——animpressivecontrastwiththesolemnsilencewhichmarksthedeparturepreparationsofthegiantshipsofthepresentday。Mrs。Clemens，ClaraSpaulding，littleSusy，andthenurse—maidwereallproperlygarbedfortheoccasion。Weallhadonourstorm—rig，heavyclothesofsomberhue，butnewanddesignedandconstructedforthepurpose，strictlyinaccordancewithsea—goingetiquette；anythingwearableonlandbeingdistinctlyandodiouslyoutofthequestion。

Verywell。Onthatdeck，andglidingplacidlyamongthosehonorableandproperlyupholsteredgroups，appearedThompson，young，grave，long，slim，withanagedfuzzyplughattoweringhighontheupperendofhimandfollowedbyagrayduster，whichfloweddown，withoutbreakorwrinkle，tohisankles。Hecamestraighttous，andshookhandsandcompromisedus。Everybodycouldseethatweknewhim。A

niggerinheavencouldnothavecreatedaprofounderastonishment。

However，Thompsondidn’tknowthatanythingwashappening。Hehadnoprejudicesaboutclothes。IcanstillseehimashelookedwhenwepassedSandyHookandthewindsofthebigoceansmoteus。

Erect，lofty，andgrandhestoodfacingtheblast，holdinghisplugonwithbothhandsandhisgenerousdusterblowingoutbehind，levelwithhisneck。Therewerescoffersobserving，buthedidn’tknowit；hewasn’tdisturbed。

Inmymind，Iseehimonceafterward，clothedasbefore，takingmedowninshorthand。TheShahofPersiahadcometoEnglandandDr。

Hosmer，oftheHerald，hadsentmetoOstend，toviewhisMajesty’sprogressacrosstheChannelandwriteanaccountofit。Ican’trecallThompsonafterthat，andIwishhismemoryhadbeenaspoorasmine。

TheyhadbeenamonthinLondon，whenthefinalincidentreferredtotookplace——thearrivaloftheShahofPersia——andwerecomfortablyquarteredattheLanghamHotel。ToTwichellClemenswrote：

Wehavealuxuriouslyamplesuiteofapartmentsonthethirdfloor，ourbedroomlookingstraightupPortlandPlace，ourparlorhavinganoblearrayofgreatwindowslookingoutuponbothstreets(PortlandPlaceandthecrookthatjoinsitontoRegentStreet)。

Ninep。m。fulltwilight，richsunsettintslingeringinthewest。

Iamnotgoingtowriteanything；rathertellitwhenIgetback。

IloveyouandHarmony，andthatisallthefreshnewsI’vegotanyway。AndImeantokeepthatfreshallthetime。