第4章

XXV

LOVE—MAKINGANDADVENTURE

Ofcourse，lifewithBrownwasnotallsorrow。Ateitherendofthetriptherewasrespiteandrecreation。InSt。Louis，atPamela’stherewaslikelytobecompany：Hannibalfriendsmostly，schoolmates——girls，ofcourse。AtNewOrleanshevisitedfriendlyboats，especiallytheJohnJ。

Roe，wherehewasgenerouslywelcomed。OnesuchvisitontheRoeheneverforgot。Ayounggirlwasamongtheboat’sgueststhattrip——

anotherLaura，fifteen，winning，delightful。Theymet，andweremutuallyattracted；inthelifeofeachitwasoneofthosebrightspotswhicharelikelytocomeinyouth：oneofthosesudden，briefperiodsofromance，love——callitwhatyouwillthethingthatleadstomarriage，ifpursued。

"Iwasnotfourinchesfromthatgirl’selbowduringourwakinghoursforthenextthreedays。"

Thencameasuddeninterruption：ZebLeavenworthcameflyingaftshouting：

"ThePennsylvaniaisbackingout。"

Aflutterofemotion，afleetinggood—by，aflightacrossthedecks，aflyingleapfromromancebacktoreality，anditwasallover。Hewroteher，butreceivednoreply。Heneversawheragain，neverheardfromherforforty—eightyears，whenbothweremarried，widowed，andold。Shehadnotreceivedhisletter。

EvenonthePennsylvanialifehaditsinterests。AletterdatedMarch9，1858，recountsadelightfullydangerousnight—adventureinthesteamer’syawl，huntingforsoundingsintherunningice。

Thenthefuncommenced。Wemadefastaline20fathomslong，tothebowoftheyawl，andputthemen(bothcrews)toitlikehorsesontheshore。Brown，thepilot，stoodinthebow，withanoar，tokeepherheadout，andItookthetiller。Wewouldstartthemen，andallwouldgowelltilltheyawlwouldbringuponaheavycakeofice，andthenthemenwoulddroplikesomanytenpins，whileBrownassumedthehorizontalinthebottomoftheboat。Afteranhour’shardworkwegotback，withicehalfaninchthickontheoars。

Sentbackandwarpeduptheotheryawl，andthenGeorge(GeorgeEaler，theotherpilot)andmyselftookadoublecrewoffreshmenandtrieditagain。Thistimewefoundthechannelinlessthanhalfanhour，andlandedonanislandtillthePennsylvaniacamealongandtookusoff。Thenextdaywascolderstill。Iwasoutintheyawltwice，andthenwegotthrough，buttheinfernalsteamboatcamenearrunningoverus……WesoundedHatIsland，warpeduparoundabar，andsoundedagain——butinordertounderstandoursituationyouwillhavetoreadDr。Kane。Itwouldhavebeenimpossibletogetbacktotheboat。ButtheMariaDenningwasagroundattheheadoftheisland——theyhailedus——weranalongside，andtheyhoistedusinandthawedusout。Wehadthenbeenoutintheyawlfromfouro’clockinthemorningtillhalfpastninewithoutbeingnearafire。Therewasathickcoatingoficeovermen，andyawl，ropesandeverythingelse，andwelookedlikerock—

candystatuary。

Thiswasthesortofthinghelovedinthosedays。Wefeelthewriter’sevidentjoyandprideinit。Inthesameletterhesays："Ican’tcorrespondwiththepaper，becausewhenoneislearningtheriverheisnotallowedtodoorthinkaboutanythingelse。"ThenhementionshisbrotherHenry，andwegetthebeginningofthattragicepisodeforwhich，thoughblameless，SamuelClemensalwaysheldhimselfresponsible。

Henrywasdoinglittleornothinghere(St。Louis)，andIsenthimtoourclerktoworkhiswayforatrip，measuringwood—piles，countingcoal—boxes，anddoingotherclerklyduties，whichheperformedsatisfactorily。Hemaygodownwithusagain。

HenryClemenswasabouttwentyatthistime，ahandsome，attractiveboyofwhomhisbrotherwaslavishlyfondandproud。Hedidgoonthenexttripandcontinuedtogoregularlyafterthat，asthirdclerkinlineofpromotion。ItwasabrightspotinthoseharddayswithBrowntohaveHenryalong。Theboysspentagooddealoftheirleisurewiththeotherpilot，GeorgeEaler，who"wasaskindheartedasBrownwasn’t，"andquotedShakespeareandGoldsmith，andplayedtheflutetohisfascinatedandinspiringaudience。Thesewerethingsworthwhile。Theyoungsteersmancouldnotguessthattheshadowofalongsorrowwaseventhenstretchingacrossthepathahead。

Yetinduetimehereceivedawarning，aremarkableandimpressivewarning，thoughofakindseldomheeded。Onenight，whenthePennsylvanialayinSt。Louis，hesleptathissister’shouseandhadthisvividdream：

HesawHenry，acorpse，lyinginametallicburialcaseinthesitting—

room，supportedontwochairs。Onhisbreastlayabouquetofflowers，white，withasinglecrimsonbloominthecenter。

Whenheawoke，itwasmorning，butthedreamwassovividthathebelieveditreal。Perhapssomethingoftheoldhypnoticconditionwasuponhim，forheroseanddressed，thinkinghewouldgoinandlookathisdeadbrother。Instead，hewentoutonthestreetintheearlymorningandhadwalkedtothemiddleoftheblockbeforeitsuddenlyflasheduponhimthatitwasonlyadream。Heboundedback，rushedtothesitting—room，andfeltagreattremblingrevulsionofjoywhenhefounditreallyempty。HetoldPamelathedream，thenputitoutofhismindasquicklyashecould。ThePennsylvaniasailedfromSt。Louisasusual，andmadeasafetriptoNewOrleans。

Asafetrip，butaneventfulone；onitoccurredthatlastinterviewwithBrown，alreadymentioned。ItisrecordedintheMississippibook，butcannotbeomittedhere。Somewheredowntheriver(itwasinEagleBend)

Henryappearedonthehurricanedecktobringanorderfromthecaptainforalandingtobemadealittlelowerdown。Brownwassomewhatdeaf，butwouldneverconfessit。Hemaynothaveunderstoodtheorder；atalleventshegavenosignofhavingheardit，andwentstraightahead。HedislikedHenryashedislikedeverybodyoffinergrainthanhimself，andinanycasewastooarroganttoaskforarepetition。TheywerepassingthelandingwhenCaptainKlinefelterappearedondeckandcalledtohimtolettheboatcomearound，adding：

"Didn’tHenrytellyoutolandhere？"

"No，sir。"

Captain。KlinefelterturnedtoSam：

"Didn’tyouhearhim？"

"Yes，sir。"

Brownsaid："Shutyourmouth！Youneverheardanythingofthekind。"

ByandbyHenrycameintothepilot—house，unawareofanytrouble。Brownsetuponhiminhisugliestmanner。

"Here，whydidn’tyoutellmewehadgottolandatthatplantation？"hedemanded。

Henrywasalwayspolite，alwaysgentle。

"Ididtellyou，Mr。Brown。"

"It’salie。"

SamClemenscouldstandBrown’sabuseofhimself，butnotofHenry。Hesaid："Youlieyourself。Hedidtellyou。"

Brownwasdazedforamomentandthenheshouted：

"I’llattendtoyourcaseinhalfaminute！"andorderedHenryoutofthepilot—house。

Theboyhadstarted，whenBrownsuddenlyseizedhimbythecollarandstruckhimintheface。——[IntheMississippibookthewriterstatesthatBrownstartedtostrikeHenrywithalargepieceofcoal；but，inaletterwrittensoonaftertheoccurrencetoMrs。OrionClemens，hesays：

"Henrystartedoutofthepilot—house—Brownjumpedupandcollaredhim——

turnedhimhalf—wayaroundandstruckhimintheface！—andhimnearlysixfeethigh—struckmylittlebrother。Iwaswildfromthatmoment。Ilefttheboattosteerherself，andavengedtheinsult——andthecaptainsaidI

wasright。"]——InstantlySamwasuponBrown，withaheavystool，andstretchedhimonthefloor。Thenallthebitternessandindignationthathadbeensmolderingformonthsflamedup，and，leapinguponBrownandholdinghimwithhisknees，hepoundedhimwithhisfistsuntilstrengthandfurygaveout。Brownstruggledfree，then，andwithpilotinstinctsprangtothewheel，forthevesselhadbeendriftingandmighthavegotintotrouble。Seeingtherewasnofurtherdanger，heseizedaspy—glassasaweapon。

"Getoutofthisherepilot—house，"heraged。

Buthissubordinatewasnotafraidofhimnow。

"Youshouldleaveoutthe’here，’"hedrawled，critically。"Itisunderstood，andnotconsideredgoodEnglishform。"

"Don’tyougivemenoneofyourairs，"yelledBrown。"Iain’tgoingtostandnothingmorefromyou。"

"Youshouldsay，’Don’tgivemeanyofyourairs，’"Samsaid，sweetly，"andthelasthalfofyoursentencealmostdefiescorrection。"

Agroupofpassengersandwhite—apronedservants，assembledonthedeckforward，applaudedthevictor。

Brownturnedtothewheel，ragingandgrowling。Clemenswentbelow，whereheexpectedCaptainKlinefeltertoputhiminirons，perhaps，foritwasthoughttobefelonytostrikeapilot。Theofficertookhimintohisprivateroomandclosedthedoor。Atfirsthelookedattheculpritthoughtfully，thenhemadesomeinquiries：

"Didyoustrikehimfirst？"CaptainKlinefelterasked。

"Yes，sir。"

"Whatwith？"

"Astool，sir。"

"Hard？"

"Middling，sir。"

"Diditknockhimdown？"

"He——hefell，sir。"

"Didyoufollowitup？Didyoudoanythingfurther？"

"Yes，sir。"

"Whatdidyoudo？"

"Poundedhim，sir。"

"Poundedhim？"

"Yes，sir。"

"Didyoupoundhimmuch——thatis，severely？"

"Onemightcallitthat，sir，maybe。"

"Iamdeucedgladofit！Harkye，nevermentionthatIsaidthat。

Youhavebeenguiltyofagreatcrime；anddon’teverbeguiltyofitagainonthisboat，but——layforhimashore！Givehimagoodsoundthrashing；doyouhear？I’llpaytheexpenses。——["LifeontheMississippi。"]——

CaptainKlinefeltertoldhimtoclearout，then，andtheculpritheardhimenjoyinghimselfasthedoorclosedbehindhim。Brown，ofcourse，forbadehimthepilothouseafterthat，andhespenttherestofthetrip"anemancipatedslave"listeningtoGeorgeEaler’sfluteandhisreadingsfromGoldsmithandShakespeare；playingchesswithhimsometimes，andlearningatrickwhichhewouldusehimselfinthelongafter—years——thatoftakingbackthelastmoveandrunningoutthegamedifferentlywhenhesawdefeat。

BrownsworethathewouldleavetheboatatNewOrleansifSamClemensremainedonit，andCaptainKlinefeltertoldBrowntogo。Thenwhenanotherpilotcouldnotbeobtainedtofillhisplace，thecaptainofferedtoletClemenshimselfrunthedaylightwatches，thusshowinghisconfidenceintheknowledgeoftheyoungsteersman，whohadbeenonlyalittlemorethanayearatthewheel。ButClemenshimselfhadlessconfidenceandadvisedthecaptaintokeepBrownbacktoSt。Louis。HewouldfollowuptheriverbyanotherboatandresumehisplaceassteersmanwhenBrownwasgone。Withoutknowingit，hemayhavesavedhislifebythatdecision。

Itisdoubtfulifherememberedhisrecentdisturbingdream，thoughsomeforebodingwouldseemtohavehungoverhimthenightbeforethePennsylvaniasailed。Henrylikedtojoininthenight—watchesontheleveewhenhehadfinishedhisduties，andthebrothersoftenwalkedtheroundchattingtogether。Onthisparticularnighttheelderspokeofdisasterontheriver。Finallyhesaid：

"Incaseofaccident，whateveryoudo，don’tloseyourhead——thepassengerswilldothat。Rushforthehurricanedeckandtothelife—

boat，andobeythemate’sorders。Whentheboatislaunched，helpthewomenandchildrenintoit。Don’tgetinyourself。Theriverisonlyamilewide。Youcanswimashoreeasilyenough。"

Itwasgoodmanlyadvice，butityieldedalongharvestofsorrow。

XXVI

THETRAGEDYOFTHE"PENNSYLVANIA"

CaptainKlinefelterobtainedhissteersmanapassontheA。T。Lacey，whichlefttwodaysbehindthePennsylvania。Thiswaspleasant，forBartBowenhadbecomecaptainofthatfineboat。TheLaceytouchedatGreenville，Mississippi，andavoicefromthelandingshouted：

"ThePennsylvaniaisblownupjustbelowMemphis，atShipIsland！Onehundredandfiftyliveslost！"

Nothingfurthercouldbelearnedthere，butthateveningatNapoleonaMemphisextrareportedsomeoftheparticulars。HenryClemens’snamewasmentionedasoneofthose，whohadescapedinjury。Stillfartheruptherivertheygotalaterextra。Henrywasagainmentioned；thistimeasbeingscaldedbeyondrecovery。BythetimetheyreachedMemphistheyknewmostofthedetails：Atsixo’clockthatwarmmid—Junemorning，whileloadingwoodfromalargeflat—boatsixtymilesbelowMemphis，fouroutofeightofthePennsylvania’sboilershadsuddenlyexplodedwithfearfulresults。Alltheforwardendoftheboathadbeenblownout。

Manypersonshadbeenkilledoutright；manymorehadbeenscaldedandcrippledandwoulddie。Itwasoneofthosehopeless，wholesalesteamboatslaughterswhichformorethanagenerationhadmadetheMississippiariverofdeathandtears。

SamuelClemensfoundhisbrotherstretcheduponamattressonthefloorofanimprovisedhospital——apublichall——surroundedbymorethanthirtyothersmoreorlessdesperatelyinjured。HewastoldthatHenryhadinhaledsteamandthathisbodywasbadlyscalded。Hiscasewasconsideredhopeless。

Henrywasoneofthosewhohadbeenblownintotheriverbytheexplosion。Hehadstartedtoswimfortheshore，onlyafewhundredyardsaway，butpresently，feelingnopainandbelievinghimselfunhurt，hehadturnedbacktoassistintherescueoftheothers。Whathedidafterthatcouldnotbeclearlylearned。Thevesselhadtakenfire；therescuedwerebeingcarriedaboardthebigwood—boatstillattachedtothewreck。Thefiresoonragedsothattherescuersandallwhocouldbesavedweredrivenintothewood—flat，whichwasthencutadriftandlanded。Therethesufferershadtolieintheburningsunmanyhoursuntilhelpcouldcome。Henrywasamongthosewhowereinsensiblebythattime。Perhapshehadreallybeenuninjuredatfirstandhadbeenscaldedinhisworkofrescue；itwillneverbeknown。

Hisbrother，hearingthesethings，wasthrownintothedeepestagonyandremorse。Heheldhimselftoblameforeverything；forHenry’spresenceontheboat；forhisadviceconcerningsafetyofothers；forhisownabsencewhenhemighthavebeentheretohelpandprotecttheboy。Hewantedtotelegraphatoncetohismotherandsistertocome，butthedoctorspersuadedhimtowait——justwhy，heneverknew。HesentwordofthedisastertoOrion，whobythistimehadsoldoutinKeokukandwasinEastTennesseestudyinglaw；thenhesethimselftotheallbuthopelesstaskoftryingtobringHenrybacktolife。ManyMemphisladieswereactingasnurses，andone，aMissWood，attractedbytheboy’syouthandstrikingfeatures，joinedinthedesperateeffort。Somemedicalstudentshadcometoassistthedoctors，andoneofthesealsotookspecialinterestinHenry’scase。Dr。Peyton，anoldMemphispractitioner，declaredthatwithsuchcaretheboymightpullthrough。

Butonthefourthnighthewasconsideredtobedying。Halfdeliriouswithgriefandthestrainofwatching，SamuelClemenswrotetohismotherandtohissister—in—lawinTennessee。ThelettertoOrionClemens’swifehasbeenpreserved。

MEMPHIS，TENN。，Friday，June18，1858。

DEARSISTERMOLLIE，——LongbeforethisreachesyoumypoorHenry——mydarling，mypride，myglory，myallwillhavefinishedhisblamelesscareer，andthelightofmylifewillhavegoneoutinutterdarkness。Thehorrorsofthreedayshavesweptoverme——theyhaveblastedmyyouthandleftmeanoldmanbeforemytime。Mollie，therearegrayhairsinmyheadto—night。Forforty—eighthoursI

laboredatthebedsideofmypoorburnedandbruisedbutuncomplainingbrother，andthenthestarofmyhopewentoutandleftmeinthegloomofdespair。Mentakemebythehandandcongratulateme，andcallme"lucky"becauseIwasnotonthePennsylvaniawhensheblewup！MayGodforgivethem，fortheyknownotwhattheysay。

IwasonthePennsylvaniafiveminutesbeforesheleftN。Orleans，andImusttellyouthetruth，Mollie——threehundredhumanbeingsperishedbythatfearfuldisaster。ButmayGodblessMemphis，thenoblestcityonthefaceoftheearth。Shehasdoneherdutybythesepoorafflictedcreatures——especiallyHenry，forhehashadfive——aye，ten，fifteen，twentytimesthecareandattentionthatanyoneelsehashad。Dr。Peyton，thebestphysicianinMemphis(heisexactlyliketheportraitsofWebster)，satbyhimfor36hours。

Thereare32scaldedmeninthatroom，andyouwouldknowDr。

PeytonbetterthanIcandescribehimifyoucouldfollowhimaroundandheareachmanmurmurashepasses，"MaytheGodofHeavenblessyou，Doctor！"Theladieshavedonewell，too。Oursecondmate，ahandsome，noble—heartedyoungfellow，willdie。Yesterdayabeautifulgirlof15stoopedtimidlydownbyhissideandhandedhimaprettybouquet。Thepoorsufferingboy’seyeskindled，hislipsquiveredoutagentle"Godblessyou，Miss，"andheburstintotears。Hemadethemwritehernameonacardforhim，thathemightnotforgetit。

Prayforme，Mollie，andprayformypoorsinlessbrother。

Yourunfortunatebrother，SAML。L。CLEMENS。

P。S。——IgotheretwodaysafterHenry。

But，alas，thiswasnotall，northeworst。ItwouldseemthatSamuelClemens’scupofremorsemustbealwaysoverfull。Thefinaldraftthatwouldembitterhisyearswasaddedthesixthnightaftertheaccident——

thenightthatHenrydied。Hecouldneverbringhimselftowriteit。Hewasneverknowntospeakofitbuttwice。

Henryhadralliedsoonaftertheforegoingletterhadbeenmailed，andimprovedslowlythatdayandthenext：Dr。Peytoncamearoundabouteleveno’clockonthesixthnightandmadecarefulexamination。Hesaid：

"Ibelieveheisoutofdangerandwillgetwell。Heislikelytoberestlessduringthenight；thegroansandfrettingoftheotherswilldisturbhim。Ifhecannotrestwithoutit，tellthephysicianinchargetogivehimone—eighthofagrainofmorphine。"

Theboydidwakeduringthenight，andwasdisturbedbythecomplainingoftheothersufferers。Hisbrothertoldtheyoungmedicalstudentinchargewhatthedoctorhadsaidaboutthemorphine。Butmorphinewasanewdrugthen；thestudenthesitated，saying：

"Ihavenowayofmeasuring。Idon’tknowhowmuchaneighthofagrainwouldbe。"

Henrygrewrapidlyworse——moreandmorerestless。Hisbrotherwashalfbesidehimselfwiththetortureofit。Hewenttothemedicalstudent。

"Ifyouhavestudieddrugs，"hesaid，"yououghttobeabletojudgeaneighthofagrainofmorphine。"

Theyoungman’scouragewasover—swayed。Heyieldedandladledoutintheold—fashionedway，onthepointofaknife—blade，whathebelievedtobetherightamount。Henryimmediatelysankintoaheavysleep。Hediedbeforemorning。Hischanceoflifehadbeeninfinitesimal，andhisdeathwasnotnecessarilyduetothedrug，butSamuelClemens，unsparinginhisself—blame，allhisdayscarriedtheburdenofit。

Hesawtheboytakentothedeadroom，thenthelongstrainofgrief，thedaysandnightswithoutsleep，theghastlyrealizationoftheendovercamehim。AcitizenofMemphistookhimawayinakindofdazeandgavehimabedinhishouse，wherehefellintoastuporoffatigueandsurrender。Itwasmanyhoursbeforehewoke；whenhedid，atlast，hedressedandwenttowhereHenrylay。Thecoffinprovidedforthedeadwereofunpaintedwood，buttheyouthandstrikingfaceofHenryClemenshadarousedaspecialinterest。TheladiesofMemphishadmadeupafundofsixtydollarsandboughtforhimametalliccase。SamuelClemensentering，sawhisbrotherlyingexactlyashehadseenhiminhisdream，lackingonlythebouquetofwhiteflowerswithitscrimsoncenter——adetailmadecompletewhilehestoodthere，foratthatmomentanelderlyladycameinwithalargewhitebouquet，andinthecenterofitwasasingleredrose。

OrionarrivedfromTennessee，andthebrotherstooktheirsorrowfulburdentoSt。Louis，subsequentlytoHannibal，hisoldhome。Thedeathofthislovelyboywasaheavysorrowtothecommunitywherehewasknown，forhehadbeenafavoritewithall。——[ForafinecharacterizationofHenryClemensthereaderisreferredtoaletterwrittenbyOrionClemenstoMissWood。SeeAppendixA，attheendofthelastvolume。]

>FromHannibalthefamilyreturnedtoPamela’shomeinSt。Louis。ThereonenightOrionheardhisbrothermoaningandgrievingandwalkingthefloorofhisroom。ByandbySamcameintowhereOrionwas。Hecouldendureitnolonger，hesaid；hemust，"tellsomebody。"

Thenhepouredallthestoryofthatlasttragicnight。Ithasbeensetdownherebecauseitaccountsformuchinhisafter—life。Itmagnifiedhisnaturalcompassionfortheweaknessandblundersofhumanity，whileitincreasedthepooropinionimplantedbytheScotchmanMacfarlaneofthehumanbeingasadivineinvention。TwoofMarkTwain’schiefcharacteristicswere——considerationforthehumanspecies，andcontemptforit。

InmanywaysheneverovercamethetragedyofHenry’sdeath。Heneverreallylookedyoungagain。Grayhairshadcome，ashesaid，andtheydidnotdisappear。Hisfacetookontheserious，patheticlookwhichfromthattimeitalwayshadinrepose。Attwenty—threehelookedthirty。Atthirtyhelookednearerforty。Afterthatthediscrepancyinageandlooksbecamelessnotable。Invigor，complexion，andtemperamenthewasregardedinlaterlifeasyoungforhisyears，butneverinlooks。

XXVII

THEPILOT

TheyoungpilotreturnedtotheriverassteersmanforGeorgeEaler，whomheloved，andinSeptemberofthatyearobtainedafulllicenseasMississippiRiverpilot。——[InLifeontheMississippihegiveshisperiodoflearningatfromtwototwoandahalfyears；butdocumentaryevidenceaswellasMr。Bixby’stestimonyplacestheapprenticeshipateighteenmonths]——Bixbyhadreturnedbythistime，andtheywereagaintogether，firstontheCrescentCity，lateronafinenewboatcalledtheNewFallsCity。ClemenswasstillasteersmanwhenBixbyreturned；butassoonashislicensewasgranted(September9，1858)hisoldchieftookhimasfullpartner。

Hewasapilotatlast。Ineighteenmonthshehadpackedawayinhisheadallthemultitudeofvolatilestatisticsandacquiredthatconfidenceandcouragewhichmadehimoneoftheelect，ariversovereign。HekneweverysnagandbankanddeadtreeandreefinallthoseendlessmilesbetweenSt。LouisandNewOrleans，everycut—offandcurrent，everydepthofwater——thewholestory——bynightandbyday。Hecouldsmelldangerinthedark；hecouldreadthesurfaceofthewaterasanopenpage。Attwenty—threehehadacquiredaprofessionwhichsurpassedallothersforabsolutesovereigntyandyieldedanincomeequaltothatthenearnedbytheVice—PresidentoftheUnitedStates。Boysgenerallyfinishcollegeataboutthatage，butitisnotlikelythatanyboyeverfinishedcollegewiththemassofpracticalinformationandtrainingthatwasstoredawayinSamuelClemens’shead，orwithhisknowledgeofhumannature，hispreparationforbattlewiththeworld。

"Notonlywasheapilot，butagoodone。"TheseareHoraceBixby’swords，andheadded：

"Itisthefashionto—daytodisparageSam’spiloting。MenwhowerebornsincehewasontheriverandneversawhimwilltellyouthatSamwasnevermuchofapilot。Mostofthemwilltellyouthathewasneverapilotatall。Asamatteroffact，Samwasafinepilot，andinadaywhenpilotingontheMississippirequiredagreatdealmorebrainsandskillandapplicationthanitdoesnow。Therewerenosignal—lightsalongtheshoreinthosedays，andnosearch—lightsonthevessels；

everythingwasblind，andonadark，mistynightinariverfullofsnagsandshiftingsand——barsandchangingshores，apilot’sjudgmenthadtobefoundedonabsolutecertainty。"

Hehadplentyofmoneynow。Hecouldhelphismotherwithaliberalhand，andhedidit。HehelpedOrion，too，withmoneyandwithadvice。

>Fromaletterwrittentowardtheendoftheyear，wegatherthenewconditions。Orionwouldseemtohavebeenlamentingoverprospects，andtheyoungpilot，strongandexaltedinhisnewestate，urgeshimtorenewedconsistenteffort：

Whatisagovernmentwithoutenergy？——[hesays]——。Andwhatisamanwithoutenergy？Nothing——nothingatall。Whatisthegrandestthingin"ParadiseLost"——theArch—Fiend’sterribleenergy！WhatwasthegreatestfeatureinNapoleon’scharacter？Hisunconquerableenergy！Sumallthegiftsthatmanisendowedwith，andwegiveourgreatestshareofadmirationtohisenergy。Andto—day，ifIwereaheathen，IwouldrearastatuetoEnergy，andfalldownandworshipit！

Iwantamanto——Iwantyouto——takeupalineofaction，andfollowitout，inspiteoftheverydevil。

OrionandhiswifehadreturnedtoKeokukbythistime，waitingforsomethinginthewayofabusinessopportunity。

Hispilotbrother，wrotehimmorethanoncelettersofencouragementandcouncil。HereandtherehereferstothetragedyofHenry’sdeath，andtheshadowithascastuponhislife；buthewasyoung，hewassuccessful，hisspiritswerenaturallyexuberant。Intheexhilarationofyouthandhealthandsuccesshefindsventattimesinthatnaturalhumanoutlet，self—approval。Henotonlyexhibitsthisweakness，butconfessesitwithcharacteristicfreedom。

Puttingallthingstogether，IbegintothinkIamratherluckythanotherwise——anotionwhichIwasslowtotakeup。TheothernightI

wasaboutto"roundto"forastorm，butconcludedthatIcouldfindasmootherbanksomewhere。Ilandedfivemilesbelow。Thestormcame，passedawayanddidnotinjureus。Comingup，daybeforeyesterday，IlookedatthespotIfirstchose，andhalfthetreesonthebankweretorntoshreds。Wecouldn’thavelived5minutesinsuchatornado。AndIamalsoluckyinhavingaberth，whilealltheotheryoungpilotsareidle。Thisistheluckiestcircumstancethateverbefellme。Notonaccountofthewages——forthatisasecondaryconsideration—butfromthefactthattheCityofMemphisisthelargestboatinthetrade，andthehardesttopilot，andconsequentlyIcangetareputationonher，whichisathingInevercouldaccomplishonatransientboat。Ican"bank"intheneighborhoodof$100amonthonher，andthatwillsatisfymeforthepresent(principallybecausetheotheryoungstersaresuckingtheirfingers)。Blessme！whatapleasurethereisinrevenge！——andwhatvastrespectProsperitycommands！Why，sixmonthsago，Icouldenterthe"Rooms，"andreceiveonlythecustomaryfraternalgreetingnowtheysay，"Why，howareyou，oldfellow——whendidyougetin？"

Andtheyoungpilotswhousetotellme，patronizingly，thatIcouldneverlearntherivercannotkeepfromshowingalittleoftheirchagrinatseeingmesofaraheadofthem。Permitmeto"blowmyhorn，"forIderivealivingpleasurefromthesethings，andImustconfessthatwhenIgotopaymydues，Iratherliketoletthed———drascalsgetaglimpseofahundred—dollarbillpeepingoutfromamongstnotesofsmallerdimensionswhosefaceIdonotexhibit！Youwilldespisethisegotism，butItellyouthereisa"sternjoy"init。

WearedwellingonthisperiodofMarkTwain’slife，foritwasaperiodthatperhapsmorethananyotherinfluencedhisfutureyears。Hebecamecompletelysaturatedwiththeriveritsterms，itsmemories，itsinfluenceremainedadefinitefactorinhispersonalitytotheendofhisdays。Moreover，itwashisfirstperiodofgreattriumph。Wherebeforehehadbeenasubalternnotalwaysevenawage—earner——nowallinamomenthehadbeentransformedintoahighchief。Thefullestambitionofhischildhoodhadbeenrealized——morethanrealized，forinthatdayhehadneverdreamedofaboatorofanincomeofsuchstatelyproportions。Ofgreatpersonalpopularity，andregardedasasafepilot，hehadbeengivenoneofthelargest，mostdifficultofboats。Single—

handedandalonehehadfoughthiswayintothecompanyofkings。

Andwemaypardonhisvanity。Hecouldhardlyfailtofeelhisgloryandrevelinitandwearitasahalo，perhaps，alittlenowandthenintheAssociationRooms。Tothisdayheisrememberedasafigurethere，thoughwemaybelieve，regardlessofhisownstatement，thatitwasnotentirelybecauseofhissuccess。AstheboysofHannibalhadgatheredaroundtolistenwhenSamClemensbegantospeak，sowemaybecertainthatthepilotsatSt。LouisandNewOrleanslaidasideotherthingswhenhehadanobservationtomakeorataletotell。

Hewasmuchgiventospinningyarns——[writesoneassociateofthosedays]——sofunnythathishearerswereconvulsed，andyetallthetimehisownfacewasperfectlysober。Ifhelaughedatall，itmusthavebeeninside。Itwouldhavekilledhishearerstodothat。

Occasionallysomeofhisdrollyarnswouldgetintothepapers。Hemayhavewrittenthemhimself。

AnotherrivermanofthosedayshasrecalledastoryheheardSamClemenstell：

Wewerespeakingofpresenceofmindinaccidents——wewerealwaystalkingofsuchthings；thenhesaid：

"Boys，Ihadgreatpresenceofmindonce。Itwasatafire。Anoldmanleanedoutofafour—storybuildingcallingforhelp。Everybodyinthecrowdbelowlookedup，butnobodydidanything。Theladdersweren’tlongenough。Nobodyhadanypresenceofmind——nobodybutme。Icametotherescue。Iyelledforarope。WhenitcameI

threwtheoldmantheendofit。HecaughtitandItoldhimtotieitaroundhiswaist。Hedidso，andIpulledhimdown。"

Thiswasoneofthestoriesthatgotintoprintandtraveledfar。

Perhaps，astheoldpilotsuggests，hewrotesomeofthemhimself，forHoraceBixbyremembersthat"Samwasalwaysscribblingwhennotatthewheel。"

Butifhepublishedanyworkinthoseriver—dayshedidnotacknowledgeitlater——withoneexception。Theexceptionwasnotintendedforpublication，either。Itwasaburlesquewrittenfortheamusementofhisimmediatefriends。Hehastoldthestoryhimself，morethanonce，butitbelongshereforthereasonthatsomewhereoutofthegeneralcircumstanceofitthereoriginatedapseudonym，onedaytobecomethebest—knowninthehemispheresthenameMarkTwain。

Thatterse，positive，peremptory，dynamicpen—namewasfirstusedbyanoldpilotnamedIsaiahSellers——asortof"oldestinhabitant"oftheriver，whomadetheotherpilotswearywiththescopeandantiquityofhisreminiscentknowledge。HecontributedparagraphsofgeneralinformationandNestorianopinionstotheNewOrleansPicayune，andsignedthem"MarkTwain。"Theywerequaintlyegotisticalintone，usuallybeginning："MyopinionforthebenefitofthecitizensofNewOrleans，"andrecitingincidentsandcomparisonsdatingasfarbackas1811。

CaptainSellersnaturallywasregardedasfairgamebytheyoungpilots，whoamusedthemselvesbyimitatinghismannerandgeneralattitudeofspeech。ButClemenswentfurther；hewroteatconsiderablelengthabroadlyburlesqueimitationsigned"SergeantFathom，"withanintroductionwhichreferredtothesaidFathomas"oneoftheoldestcubpilotsontheriver。"Theletterthatfollowedrelatedaperfectlyimpossibletrip，supposedtohavebeenmadein1763bythesteamer"theoldfirstJubilee"witha"ChinesecaptainandaChoctawcrew。"Itisagemofitskind，andwillbearreprintinfulltoday。——[SeeAppendixB，attheendofthelastvolume。]

TheburlesquedelightedBartBowen，whowasClemens’spilotpartnerontheEdwardJ。Gayatthetime。Heinsistedonshowingittoothersandfinallyuponprintingit。Clemenswasreluctant，butconsented。ItappearedintheTrueDelta(May8or9，1859)，andwaswidelyandboisterouslyenjoyed。

ItbrokeCaptainSellers’sliteraryheart。Henevercontributedanotherparagraph。MarkTwainalwaysregrettedthewholematterdeeply，andhisownrevivalofthenamewasasortoftributetotheoldmanhehadthoughtlesslywounded。IfCaptainSellershasknowledgeofmaterialmattersnow，heisprobablysatisfied；forthesethingsbroughttohim，andtothenamehehadchosen，whathecouldneverhimselfhaveachieved——immortality。

XXVIII

PILOTINGANDPROPHECY

ThosewhoknewSamuelClemensbestinthosedayssaythathewasaslender，fine—lookingman，welldressed——evendandified——giventopatentleathers，blueserge，whiteduck，andfancystripedshirts。Oldforhisyears，heheightenedhisappearanceattimesbywearinghisbeardintheatrociousmutton—chopfashion，thenpopular，butbecomingtonoone，leastofalltohim。Thepilotsregardedhimasagreatreader——

astudentofhistory，travels，literature，andthesciences——ayoungmanwhomitwasaneducationaswellasanentertainmenttoknow。Whennotatthewheel，hewaslikelytobereadingortellingyarnsintheAssociationRooms。

HebeganthestudyofFrenchonedaywhenhepassedaschooloflanguages，wherethreetongues，French，German，andItalian，weretaught，oneineachofthreerooms。Thepricewastwenty—fivedollarsforonelanguage，orthreeforfiftydollars。Thestudentwasprovidedwithasetofcardsforeachroomandsupposedtowalkfromoneapartmenttoanother，changingtonguesateachthreshold。Withhisunusualenthusiasmandprodigality，theyoungpilotdecidedtotakeallthreelanguages，butafterthefirsttwoorthreeroundtripsconcludedthatforthepresentFrenchwoulddo。Hedidnotreturntotheschool，butkepthiscardsandboughttext—books。Hemusthavestudiedprettyfaithfullywhenhewasoffwatchandinport，forhisrivernote—bookcontainsaFrenchexercise，allneatlywritten，anditisfromtheDialoguesofVoltaire。

Thisoldnote—bookisinterestingforotherthings。Thenotesarenolongertimid，hesitatingmemoranda，butvigorousrecordsmadewiththedashofassurancethatcomesfromconfidenceandknowledge，andwiththeauthorityofoneinsupremecommand。Undertheheadof"2dhigh—watertrip——Jan。，1861——AlonzoChild，"wehavethestoryofarisingriverwithitsoverflowingbanks，itsblindpassagesandcut—offs——allthecircumstanceanduncertaintyofchange。

GooddealofwateralloverColesCreekChute，12or15ft。bank——

couldhavegoneupshoreaboveGeneralTaylor’s——toomuchdrift……

Night——didn’truneither77or76towheads——8ft。bankonmainshoreOzarkChute……

Andsoonpageafterpageofcryptographicmemoranda。Itmeanslittleenoughtothelayreader，yetonegetsanimpressionsomehowoftheswirling，turbulentwaterandalonelyfigureinthathighglassed—inplacepeeringintothedarkforblindland—marksandpossibledangers，pickinghiswayupthedim，hungryriverofwhichhemustknoweveryfootaswellasamanknowsthehallofhisownhome。Allthequalificationsmustcomeintoplay，thenmemory，judgment，courage，andthehighartofsteering。"Steeringisaveryhigh，art，"hesays；"onemustnotkeeparudderdraggingacrossaboat’ssternifhewantstogetuptheriverfast。"

HehadanexampleoftheperfectionofthisartonemistynightontheAlonzoChild。Nearlyfiftyyearslater，sittingonhisverandainthedark，herecalledit。Hesaid：

"TherewasapilotinthosedaysbythenameofJackLeonardwhowasaperfectlywonderfulcreature。IdonotknowthatJackknewanymoreabouttheriverthanmostofusandperhapscouldnotreadthewateranybetter，buthehadaknackofsteeringawayaheadofourability，andI

thinkhemusthavehadaneyethatcouldseefartherintothedarkness。

"IhadneverseenLeonardsteer，butIhadheardagooddealaboutit。I

hadhearditsaidthatthecrankiestoldtubafloat——onethatwouldkillanyothermantohandle——wouldobeyandbeasdocileasachildwhenJackLeonardtookthewheel。Ihadachanceonenighttoverifythatformyself。Weweregoinguptheriver，anditwasoneofthenastiestnightsIeversaw。Besidesthat，theboatwasloadedinsuchawaythatshesteeredveryhard，andIwashalfblindandcrazytryingtolocatethesafechannel，andwaspullingmyarmsouttokeepherinit。Itwasoneofthosenightswheneverythinglooksthesamewhicheverwayyoulook：justtwolonglineswheretheskycomesdowntothetreesandwherethetreesmeetthewaterwithallthetreespreciselythesameheight——

allplantedonthesameday，asoneoftheboysusedtoputit——andnotathingtosteerbyexcepttheknowledgeinyourheadoftherealshapeoftheriver。Someoftheboatshadwhattheycalla’nighthawk’onthejackstaff，athingwhichyoucouldseewhenitwasintherightpositionagainsttheskyorthewater，thoughitseldomwasintherightpositionandwasgenerallyprettyuseless。

"IwasinabadwaythatnightandwonderinghowIcouldevergetthroughit，whenthepilot—housedooropened，andJackLeonardwalkedin。Hewasapassengerthattrip，andIhadforgottenhewasaboard。Iwasjustaboutintheworstplaceandwaspullingtheboatfirstoneway，thenanother，runningthewheelbackwardandforward，andclimbingitlikeasquirrel。

"’Sam，’hesaid，"letmetakethewheel。MaybeIhavebeenoverthisplacesinceyouhave。’

"Ididn’targuethequestion。Jacktookthewheel，gaveitalittleturnoneway，thenalittleturntheother；thatoldboatsettleddownasquietlyasalamb——wentrightalongasifithadbeenbroaddaylightinariverwithoutsnags，bars，bottom，orbanks，oranythingthatonecouldpossiblyhit。Ineversawanythingsobeautiful。Hestayedmywatchoutforme，andIhopeIwasdecentlygrateful。Ihaveneverforgottenit。"

Theoldnote—bookcontainedtherecordofmanysuchnightsasthat；buttherewereothernights，too，whenthestarswereblazingout，orwhenthemoononthewatermadetheriverawidemysteriouswayofspeculativedreams。Hewasalwaysspeculating；theplanetsandtheremotesunswerealwaysamarveltohim。Aloveofastronomy——theromanceofit，itsvastdistances，anditspossibilities——beganwiththoselonelyriver—watchesandneverwanedtohislastday。Foratimeagreatcometblazedintheheavens，a"wonderfulsheafoflight"thatglorifiedhislonelywatch。

Nightafternighthewatcheditasitdevelopedandthengrewdim，andhereadeagerlyallthecometliteraturethatcametohishand，thenorafterward。Hespeculatedofmanythings：oflife，death，thereasonofexistence，ofcreation，thewaysofProvidenceandDestiny。Itwasafruitfultimeforsuchmeditation；outofsuchvigilsgrewthoselargerphilosophiesthatwouldfindexpressionlater，whentheyearshadconferredthemagicgiftofphrase。

Lifelayallaheadofhimthen，andduringthosestillwatcheshemusthaverevolvedmanytheoriesofhowthefutureshouldbemetandmastered。

Intheoldnotebooktherestillremainsawell—wornclipping，thewordsofsomeunknownwriter，whichhehadpreservedandmayhaveconsultedasasortofcreed。Itisaninterestinglittledocument——apropheticone，thereadermayconcede：

HOWTOTAKELIFE。——Takeitjustasthoughitwas——asitis——anearnest，vital，andimportantaffair。Takeitasthoughyouwereborntothetaskofperformingamerrypartinit——asthoughtheworldhadawaitedforyourcoming。Takeitasthoughitwasagrandopportunitytodoandachieve，tocarryforwardgreatandgoodschemes；tohelpandcheerasuffering，weary，itmaybeheartbroken，brother。Nowandthenamanstandsasidefromthecrowd，laborsearnestly，steadfastly，confidently，andstraightwaybecomesfamousforwisdom，intellect，skill，greatnessofsomesort。

Theworldwonders，admires，idolizes，anditonlyillustrateswhatothersmaydoiftheytakeholdoflifewithapurpose。Themiracle，orthepowerthatelevatesthefew，istobefoundintheirindustry，application，andperseveranceunderthepromptingsofabrave，determinedspirit。

Theoldnote—bookcontainsnorecordofdisasters。HoraceBixby，whoshouldknow，hasdeclared：

"SamClemensneverhadanaccidenteitherasasteersmanorasapilot，exceptoncewhenhegotagroundforafewhoursinthebagasse(cane)

smoke，withnodamagetoanybodythoughofcoursetherewassomegoodluckinthattoo，forthebestpilotsdonotescapetrouble，nowandthen。"

BixbyandClemensweretogetherthatwinterontheAlonzoChild，andalettertoOrioncontainsanaccountofgreatfeastingwhichthetwoenjoyedata"Frenchrestaurant"inNewOrleans——"dissipatingonaten—

dollardinner——tellitnottoMa！"——wheretheyhadsheepsheadfish，oysters，birds，mushrooms，andwhatnot，"afterwhichthedaywastoofargonetodoanything。"SoitappearsthathewasnotalwaysreadingMacaulayorstudyingFrenchandastronomy，butsometimeswentfrivolingwithhisoldchief，nowhischum，alwayshisdearfriend。

AnotherletterrecordsavisitwithPamelatoapicture—galleryinSt。

LouiswherewasbeingexhibitedChurch’s"HeartoftheAndes。"Hedescribesthepictureindetailandwithvastenthusiasm。

"Ihaveseenitseveraltimes，"heconcludes，"butitisalwaysanewpicture——totallynew——youseemtoseenothingthesecondtimethatyousawthefirst。"

Furtheralonghetellsofhavingtakenhismotherandthegirls——hiscousinEllaCreelandanother——foratripdowntherivertoNewOrleans。

Mawasdelightedwithhertrip，butshewasdisgustedwiththegirlsforallowingmetoembraceandkissthem——andshewashorrifiedatthe’schottische’asperformedbyMissCastleandmyself。Shewasperfectlywillingformetodanceuntil12o’clockattheimminentperilofmygoingtosleepontheafter—watch——butthenshewouldtopoffwithaveryinconsistentsermonondancingingeneral；

endingwithaterrificbroadsideaimedatthatheresyofheresies，the’schottische’。

ItookMaandthegirlsinacarriageroundthatportionofNewOrleanswherethefinestgardensandresidencesaretobeseen，and，althoughitwasablazinghot，dustyday，theyseemedhugelydelighted。Touseanexpressionwhichiscommonlyignoredinpolitesociety，theywere"hell—bent"onstealingsomeoftheluscious—

lookingorangesfrombrancheswhichoverhungthefence，butI

restrainedthem。

InanotherletterofthisperiodwegetahintofthefutureMarkTwain。

ItwaswrittentoJohnT。Moore，ayoungclerkontheJohnJ。Roe。

WhatafoololdAdamwas。Hadeverythinghisownway；hadsucceededingainingtheloveofthebest—lookinggirlintheneighborhood，butyet，unsatisfiedwithhisconquest，hehadtoeatamiserablelittleapple。Ah，John，ifyouhadbeeninhisplaceyouwouldnothaveeatenamouthfuloftheapple——thatis，ifithadrequiredanyexertion。Ihavenoticedthatyoushunexertion。Therecomesinthedifferencebetweenus。Icourtexertion。Ilovework。Why，sir，whenIhaveapieceofworktoperform，Igoawaytomyself，sitdownintheshade，andmuseoverthecomingenjoyment。

SometimesIamsoindustriousthatImusetoolong。

Thereremainsanotherletterofthisperiod——asufficientlycuriousdocument。TherewasinthosedaysafamousNewOrleansclairvoyantknownasMadameCaprell。Someofthe’youngpilot’sfriends。hadvisitedherandobtainedwhatseemedtobesatisfyingresults。Fromtimetotimetheyhadurgedhimtovisitthefortune—teller，andoneidledayheconcludedtomaketheexperiment。AssoonashecameawayhewrotetoOrionindetail。

She’saverypleasantlittlelady——ratherpretty——about28——say5feet21/4——wouldweigh116——hasblackeyesandhair——ispoliteandintelligent——usedgoodlanguage，andtalksmuchfasterthanI

do。

Sheinvitedmeintothelittlebackparlor，closedthedoor；andwewerealone。Wesatdownfacingeachother。Thensheaskedmyage。

Thensheputherhandsbeforehereyesamoment，andcommencedtalkingasifshehadagooddealtosayandnotmuchtimetosayitin。Somethingafterthisstyle：

’Madame。’Yoursisawateryplanet；yougainyourlivelihoodonthewater；butyoushouldhavebeenalawyer——thereiswhereyourtalentslie；youmighthavedistinguishedyourselfasanorator，orasaneditor——，youhavewrittenagreatdeal；youwritewell——butyouareratheroutofpractice；nomatter——youwillbeinpracticesomeday；youhaveasuperbconstitution，andasexcellenthealthasanymanintheworld；youhavegreatpowersofendurance；inyourprofessionyourstrengthholdsoutagainstthelongestsiegeswithoutflagging；still，theupperpartofyourlungs，thetopofthem，isslightlyaffected——youmusttakecareofyourself；youdonotdrink，butyouuseentirelytoomuchtobacco；andyoumuststopit；mind，notmoderate，butstoptheuseofit，totally；thenIcanalmostpromiseyou86，whenyouwillsurelydie；otherwise，lookoutfor28，31，34，47，and65；becareful——foryouarenotofalong—

livedrace，thatis，onyourfather’sside；youaretheonlyhealthymemberofyourfamily，andtheonlyoneinitwhohasanythinglikethecertaintyofattainingtoagreatage——so，stopusingtobacco，andbecarefulofyourself……Insomerespectsyoutakeafteryourfather，butyouaremuchmorelikeyourmother，whobelongstothelong—lived，energeticsideofthehouse……Youneverbroughtallyourenergiestobearuponanysubjectbutwhatyouaccomplishedit——forinstance，youareself—made，self—educated。

’S。L。C。’Whichprovesnothing。

’Madame。’Don’tinterrupt。Whenyousoughtyourpresentoccupation，youfoundathousandobstaclesinyourway——obstaclesunknown——notevensuspectedbyanysaveyouandme，sinceyoukeepsuchmattertoyourself——butyoufoughtyourway，andhidthelongstruggleunderamaskofcheerfulness，whichsavedyourfriendsanxietyonyouraccount。TodoallthisrequiresthequalitieswhichIhavenamed。

’S。L。C。’Youflatterwell，Madame。

’Madame。’Don’tinterrupt。Uptowithinashorttimeyouhadalwayslivedfromhandtomouth——nowyouareineasycircumstances——

forwhichyouneedgivecredittonoonebutyourself。Theturning—

pointinyourlifeoccurredin1840—7—8。

’S。L。C。’Whichwas？

’Madame。’Adeath，perhaps，andthisthrewyouupontheworldandmadeyouwhatyouare；itwasalwaysintendedthatyoushouldmakeyourself；therefore，itwaswellthatthiscalamityoccurredasearlyasitdid。Youwillneverdieofwater，althoughyourcareeruponitinthefutureseemswellsprinkledwithmisfortune。Youwillcontinueuponthewaterforsometimeyet；youwillnotretirefinallyuntiltenyearsfromnow……Whatisyourbrother’sage？

23——andalawyer？andinpursuitofanoffice？Well，hestandsabetterchancethantheothertwo，andhemaygetit；heistoovisionary——isalwaysflyingoffonanewhobby；thiswillneverdo——

tellhimIsaidso。Heisagoodlawyer——averygoodlawyer——andafinespeaker——isverypopularandmuchrespected，andmakesmanyfriends；butalthoughheretainstheirfriendship，helosestheirconfidencebydisplayinghisinstabilityofcharacter……Thelandhehasnowwillbeveryvaluableafterawhile————

’S。L。C。’Say250yearshence，orthereabouts，Madame————

’Madame。’No——lesstime——butnevermindtheland，thatisasecondaryconsideration——lethimdropthatforthepresent，anddevotehimselftohisbusinessandpoliticswithallhismight，forhemustholdofficesunderGovernment……

Afterawhileyouwillpossessagooddealofproperty——retireattheendoftenyears——afterwhichyourpursuitswillbeliterary——

trythelaw——youwillcertainlysucceed。Iamdonenow。Ifyouhaveanyquestionstoask——askthemfreely——andifitbeinmypower，Iwillanswerwithoutreserve——withoutreserve。

Iaskedafewquestionsofminorimportance—paidherandleft—underthedecidedimpressionthatgoingtothefortune—teller’swasjustasgoodasgoingtotheopera，andcostscarcelyatriflemore——

ergo，Iwilldisguisemyselfandgoagain，oneofthesedays，whenotheramusementsfail。Nowisn’tshethedevil？Thatistosay，isn’tshearightsmartlittlewoman？

Whenyouwantmoney，letMaknow，andshewillsendit。SheandPamelaarealwaysfussingaboutchange，soIsentthemahundredandtwentyquartersyesterday——fiddler’schangeenoughtolasttillI

getback，Ireckon。

SAM。

Inthelightofprecedingandsubsequentevents，wemustconfessthatMadameCaprellwas"indeedarightsmartlittlewoman。"Shemademistakesenough(theletterisnotquotedinfull)，butwhenwerememberthatshenotonlygavehisprofessionatthemoment，butatleastsuggestedhiscareerforthefuture；thatsheapproximatedtheyearofhisfather’sdeathasthetimewhenhewasthrownupontheworld；thatsheadmonishedhimagainsthisbesettinghabit，tobacco；thatsheread。

minutelynotonlyhischaracteristics，buthisbrotherOrion’s；thatsheoutlinedthestruggleinhisconquestoftheriver；thatsheseeminglyhadknowledgeofOrion’slegalbentandhisconnectionwiththeTennesseeland，allseemsremarkableenough，supposing，ofcourse，shehadnomaterialmeansofacquiringknowledge——onecanneverknowcertainlyaboutsuchthings。

XXIX

THEENDOFPILOTING

Itiscurious，however，thatMadameCaprell，withclairvoyantvision，shouldnothaveseenanimportanteventthenscarcelymorethantwomonthsdistant：thebreaking—outoftheCivilWar，withtheclosingoftheriverandtheendofMarkTwain’scareerasapilot。Perhapsthesethingsweresonearastobe"thisside"therangeofsecondsight。

Therehadbeenplentyofwar—talk，butfewofthepilotsbelievedthatwarwasreallycoming。Travelingthatgreatcommercialhighway，theriver，withintercoursebothofNorthandSouth，theydidnotbelievethatanypoliticaldifferenceswouldbeallowedtointerferewiththenation’strade，orwouldbesettledotherwisethanonthestreetcorners，inthehallsoflegislation，andatthepolls。True，severalStates，includingLouisiana，haddeclaredtheUnionafailureandseceded；butthemajorityofopinionswerenotclearastohowfaraStatehadrightsinsuchamatter，orastowhattherealmeaningofsecessionmightbe。

Comparativelyfewbelieveditmeantwar。SamuelClemenshadnosuchbelief。HisMadameCaprellletterbearsdateofFebruary6，1861，yetcontainsnomentionofwarorofanyspecialexcitementinNewOrleans——

noforebodingsastonationalconditions。

Suchthingscamesoonenough：PresidentLincolnwasinauguratedonthe4thofMarch，andsixweekslaterFortSumterwasfiredupon。Menbegantospeakoutthenandtotakesides。

ItwasamomentoustimeintheAssociationRooms。TherewerepilotswhowouldgowiththeUnion；therewereotherswhowouldgowiththeConfederacy。HoraceBixbywasoneoftheformer，andinduetimebecamechiefoftheUnionRiverService。AnotherpilotnamedMontgomery(SamuelClemenshadoncesteeredforhim)declaredfortheSouth，andlatercommandedtheConfederateMississippifleet。Theywereallgoodfriends，andtheirdiscussions，thoughwarm，werenotalwaysacrimonious；buttheytooksides。

Agoodmanywerenotveryclearastotheiropinions。LivingbothNorthandSouthastheydid，theysawvariousphasesofthequestionanddividedtheirsympathies。Somewereofoneconvictiononedayandofanotherthenext。SamuelClemenswasofthelessradicalelement。Heknewtherewasagooddealtobesaidforeithercause；furthermore，hewasnotthenbloodthirsty。Apilot—housewithitselevatedpositionandtransparencyseemedapoorplacetobeinwhenfightingwasgoingon。

"I’llthinkaboutit，"hesaid。"I’mnotveryanxioustogetupintoaglassperchandbeshotatbyeitherside。I’llgohomeandreflectonthematter。"

Hedidnotrealizeit，buthehadmadehislasttripasapilot。Itisrathercuriousthathisfinalbriefnote—bookentryshouldbeginwithhisfuturenomdeplume——amemorandumofsoundings——"marktwain，"andshouldendwiththewords"nolead。"

HewentuptheriverasapassengeronasteamernamedtheUncleSam。

ZebLeavenworthwasoneofthepilots，andSamClemensusuallystoodwatchwithhim。Theyheardwar—talkallthewayandsawpreparations，buttheywerenotmolested，thoughatMemphistheybaselyescapedtheblockade。AtCairo，Illinois，theysawsoldiersdrilling——troopslatercommandedbyGrant。TheUncleSamcamesteaminguptowardSt。Louis，thoseonboardcongratulatingthemselvesonhavingcomethroughunscathed。Theywerenotquitethrough，however。AbreastofJeffersonBarrackstheysuddenlyheardtheboomofacannonandsawagreatwhorlofsmokedriftingintheirdirection。Theydidnotrealizethatitwasasignal——athunderoushalt——andkeptstraighton。Lessthanaminutelatertherewasanotherboom，andashellexplodeddirectlyinfrontofthepilot—house，breakingalotofglassanddestroyingagooddealoftheupperdecoration。ZebLeavenworthfellbackintoacornerwithayell。

"GoodLordAlmighty！Sam；"hesaid，"whatdotheymeanbythat？"

Clemenssteppedtothewheelandbroughttheboataround。"Iguesstheywantustowaitaminute，Zeb，"hesaid。

Theywereexaminedandpassed。ItwasthelaststeamboattomakethetripfromNewOrleanstoSt。Louis。MarkTwain’spilot—dayswereover。

Hewouldhavegrievedhadheknownthisfact。

"IlovedtheprofessionfarbetterthananyIhavefollowedsince，"helongafterwarddeclared，"andItookameasurelessprideinit。"

Thedreamy，easy，romanticexistencesuitedhimexactly。Asovereignandanautocrat，thepilot’swordwaslaw；heworehisresponsibilitiesasacrown。AslongashelivedSamuelClemenswouldreturntothoseolddayswithfondnessandaffection，andwithregretthattheywerenomore。

XXX

THESOLDIER

ClemensspentafewdaysinSt。Louis(inretirement，fortherewasapressingwardemandforMississippipilots)，thenwentuptoHannibaltovisitoldfriends。Theyweregladenoughtoseehim，andinvitedhimtojoinacompanyofgaymilitaryenthusiastswhowereorganizingto"helpGov。’Claib’Jacksonrepeltheinvader。"AgoodmanycompanieswereforminginandaboutHannibal，andsometimespurposeswereconflictingandbadlymixed。SomeofthevolunteersdidnotknowforatimewhichinvadertheyintendedtodrivefromMissourisoil，andmorethanonecompanyinthebeginningwasmadeupofyoungfellowswhosechiefambitionwastohavealarkregardlessastowhichcausetheymighteventuallyespouse。

——[ThemilitaryorganizationsofHannibalandPalmyra，in1861，wereasfollows：TheMarionArtillery；theSilverGrays；PalmyraGuards；theW。

E。Denniscompany，andoneortwoothers。Mostofthemweresmallprivateaffairs，usuallycomposedofabouthalf—and—halfUnionandConfederatemen，whoknewalmostnothingofthequestionsorconditions，anddisbandedinabrieftime，toattachthemselvestotheregularserviceaccordingastheydevelopedconvictions。Thegeneralideaofthesecompanieswasalittlecamping—outexpeditionandagoodtime。Onesuchcompanyonemorningreceivedunexpectedreinforcements。Theysawtheapproachoftherecruits，and，remarkinghowwelldrilledthenewarrivalsseemedtobe，mistookthemfortheenemyandfled。]

SamuelClemenshadbythistimedecided，likeLee，thathewouldgowithhisStateandleadbattalionstovictory。The"battalion"inthisinstanceconsistedofalittlesquadofyoungfellowsofhisownage，mostlypilotsandschoolmates，includingSamBowen，EdStevens，andAbGrimes，aboutadozen，alltold。Theyorganizedsecretly，fortheUnionmilitiawaslikelytocomeoverfromIllinoisanytimeandlookupanysuspiciousarmiesthatmadeanopendemonstration。Anarmymightloseenthusiasmandprestigeifitspentanightortwointhecalaboose。

SotheymetinasecretplaceaboveBearCreekHill，justasTomSawyer’sred—handedbanditshadgatheredsolongbefore(agoodmanyofthemwereofthesamelawlesslot)，andtheyplannedhowtheywouldselltheirlivesonthefieldofglory，justasTomSawyer’sbandmighthavedoneifithadthoughtaboutplaying"War，"insteadof"Indian"and"Pirate"and"Bandit"withfierceraidsonpeachorchardsandmelonpatches。Then，ontheeveningbeforemarchingaway，theystealthilycalledontheirsweethearts——thosewhohadthemdid，andtheotherspretendedsweetheartsfortheoccasion——andwhenitwasdarkandmysterioustheysaidgood—byandsuggestedthatmaybethosegirlswouldneverseethemagain。Andasalwayshappensinsuchacase，someofthemwereinearnest，andtwoorthreeofthelittlegroupthatslippedawaythatnightneverdidcomeback，andsomewheresleepinunmarkedgraves。

The"twoSams"——SamBowenandSamClemens——calledonPattyGoreandJuliaWillisfortheirgood—byvisit，and，whentheyleft，invitedthegirlsto"walkthroughthepickets"withthem，whichtheydidasfarasBearCreekHill。Thegirlsdidn’tnoticeanypickets，becausethepicketswereawaycallingongirls，too，andprobablywouldn’tbebacktobeginpicketingforsometime。SothegirlsstoodthereandwatchedthesoldiersmarchupBearCreekHillanddisappearamongthetrees。

Thearmyhadagoodenoughtimethatnight，marchingthroughthebrushandvinestowardNewLondon，thoughthissortofthinggrewrathermonotonousbymorning。Whentheytookalookatthemselvesbydaylight，withtheirnondescriptdressandaccoutrements，therewassomethingaboutitallwhichappealedtoone’ssenseofhumorratherthantohispatriotism。ColonelRalls，ofRallsCounty，however，receivedthemcordiallyandmadelifehappierforthemwithagoodbreakfastandsomeencouragingwords。Hewasauthorizedtoadministertheoathofoffice，hesaid，andheproceededtodoit，andmadethemaspeechbesides；alsohesentoutnoticetosomeoftheneighbors——toCol。BillSplawn，FarmerNuckMatson，andothers——thatthecommunityhadanarmyonitshandsandperhapsoughttodosomethingforit。Thisbroughtinanumberofcontributions，provisions，paraphernalia，andcertainsuperfluoushorsesandmules，whichconvertedthebattalionintoacavalry，andmadeitpossibleforittomoveontothefrontwithoutfurtherdelay。SamuelClemens，mountedonasmallyellowmulewhosetailhadbeentrimmeddowntoatasselattheendinastylethatsuggestedhisname，PaintBrush，upholsteredandsupplementedwithanextrapairofcowskinboots，apairofgrayblankets，ahome—madequilt，frying—pan，acarpetsack，asmallvalise，anovercoat，anold—fashionedKentuckyrifle，twentyyardsofrope，andanumbrella，wasarepresentativeunitofthebrigade。Theproperthingforanarmyloadedlikethatwastogointocamp，andtheydidit。TheywentoveronSaltRiver，nearFlorida，andcampednotfarfromafarm—housewithabiglogstable；thelattertheyusedasheadquarters。Somebodysuggestedthatwhentheywentintobattletheyoughttohaveshorthair，sothatinahand—to—handconflicttheenemycouldnotgetholdofit。TomLyonfoundapairofsheep—shearsinthestableandactedasbarber。Theywerenotverysharpshears，butthearmystoodthetortureforgloryinthefield，andagroupoflittledarkiescollectedfromthefarm—housetoenjoytheperformance。Thearmythenelecteditsofficers。WilliamElywaschosencaptain，withAsaGlasscockasfirstlieutenant。SamuelClemenswasthenvotedsecondlieutenant，andthereweresergeantsandorderlies。Therewereonlythreeprivateswhentheelectionwasover，andthesecouldnotbedistinguishedbytheirdeportment。Therewasscarcelyanydisciplineinthisarmy。

Thenitsetintorain。Itrainedbydayanditrainedbynight。SaltRiverroseuntilitwasbankfullandoverflowedthebottoms。Twicetherewasafalsenightalarmoftheenemyapproaching，andthebattalionwentsloppingthroughthemudandbrushintothedark，pickingoutthebestwaytoretreat，ploddingmiserablybacktocampwhenthealarmwasover。Oncetheyfiredavolleyatarowofmullenstalks，wavingonthebrowofahill，andonceapicketshotathisownhorsethathadgotlooseandhadwanderedtowardhiminthedusk。

Therankandfiledidnotcareforpicketduty。SamBowen——orderedbyLieutenantClemenstogoonguardoneafternoon——denouncedhissuperiorandhadtobethreatenedwithcourt—martialanddeath。Samwentfinally，buthesatinahotopenplaceandsworeatthebattalionandthewaringeneral，andfinallywenttosleepinthebroilingsun。Thesethingsbegantotellonpatriotism。PresentlyLieutenantClemensdevelopedaboil，andwasobligedtomakehimselfcomfortablewithsomehayinahorse—trough，wherehelaymostoftheday，violentlydenouncingthewarandthefoolsthatinventedit。Thenwordcamethat"General"TomHarris，whowasincommandofthedistrict，wasstoppingatafarmhousetwomilesaway，livingonthefatoftheland。

Thatsettledit。MostofthemknewTomHarris，andtheyregardedhisneglectofthemasperfidy。Theybrokecampwithoutfurtherceremony。

LieutenantClemensneededassistancetomountPaintBrush，andthelittlemulerefusedtocrosstheriver；soAbGrimestookthecoilofrope，hitchedoneendofittohisownsaddleandtheotherendtoPaintBrush’sneck。Grimeswasmountedonabighorse，andwhenhestarteditwasnecessaryforPaintBrushtofollow。Arrivingatthefartherbank，Grimeslookedaround，andwashorrifiedtoseethattheendoftheropeleddowninthewaterwithnohorseandriderinview。Hespurredupthebank，andthehatofLieutenantClemensandtheearsofPaintBrushappeared。

"Ah，"saidClemens，ashemoppedhisface，"doyouknowthatlittledevilwadedallthewayacross？"

AlittlebeyondtherivertheymetGeneralHarris，whoorderedthembacktocamp。Theyadmonishedhimto"gotherehimself。"Theysaidtheyhadbeeninthatcampandknewallaboutit。Theyweregoingnowwheretherewasfood——realfoodandplentyofit。Thenhebeggedthem，butitwasnouse。Byandbytheystoppedatafarm—houseforsupplies。Atall，bonywomancametothedoor：

"You’resecesh，ain’tyou？"

Theyacknowledgedthattheyweredefendersofthecauseandthattheywantedtobuyprovisions。Therequestseemedtoinflameher。

"Provisions！"shescreamed。"Provisionsforsecesh，andmyhusbandacolonelintheUnionArmy。Yougetoutofhere！"

Shereachedforahickoryhoop—polethatstoodbythedoor，andthearmymovedon。WhentheyarrivedatCol。BillSplawn’sthatnightColonelSplawnandhisfamilyhadgonetobed，anditseemedunwisetodisturbthem。Thehungryarmycampedinthebarnyardandcreptintothehay—lofttosleep。Presentlysomebodyyelled"Fire！"Oneoftheboyshadbeensmokingandstartedthehay。LieutenantClemenssuddenlywakened，madeaquickrollingmovementfromtheblaze，androlledoutofabighay—windowintothebarnyardbelow。Therestofthearmy，startledintoaction，seizedtheburninghayandpitcheditoutofthesamewindow。Thelieutenanthadsprainedhisanklewhenhestrucktheground，andhisboilwasfarfromwell，butwhentheburninghaydescendedheforgothisdisabilities。Literallyandfigurativelythiswasthefinalstraw。Withavoiceandvigorsuitedtotheurgenciesofthecase，hemadeaspringfromundertheburningstuff，flungofftheremnants，andwiththemhislastvestigeofinterestinthewar。Theothers，nowthatthefirewas，out，seemedtothinktheincidentboisterouslyamusing。Whereuponthelieutenantroseupandtoldthem，collectivelyandindividually，whathethoughtofthem；alsohespokeofthewarandtheConfederacy，andofthehumanraceatlarge。Theyhelpedhimin，then，forhisanklewasswellingbadly。Nextmorning，whenColonelSplawnhadgiventhemagoodbreakfast，thearmysetoutforNewLondon。

ButLieutenantClemensnevergotanyfartherthanNuckMatson’sfarm—

house。HisanklewassopainfulbythattimethatMrs。Matsonhadhimputtobed，wherehestayedforseveralweeks，recoveringfromtheinjuryandstressofwar。AlittlenegroboywaskeptonwatchforUniondetachments——theywerepassingprettyfrequentlynow——andwhenonecameinsightthelieutenantwassecludeduntilthedangerpassed。Whenhewasabletotravel，hehadhadenoughofwarandtheConfederacy。HedecidedtovisitOrioninKeokuk。OrionwasaUnionabolitionistandmightleadhimtomendhisdoctrines。

Asfortherestofthearmy，itwasnolongeraunitinthefield。Itsmembershaddriftedthiswayandthat，sometoreturntotheiroccupations，sometocontinueinthetradeofwar。SamBowenissaidtohavebeencaughtbytheFederaltroopsandputtosawingwoodinthestockadeatHannibal。Ab(A。C。)GrimesbecameanotedConfederatespyandisstillamongthosewhohavelivedtofurnishthedetailsheresetdown。Properlyofficeredanddisciplined，thatdetachmentwouldhavemadeasbravesoldiersasany。Militaryeffectivenessisamatterofleadersandtactics。

MarkTwain’sownPrivateHistoryofa’CampaignthatFailed’is，ofcourse，builtonthisepisode。Hegivesusadeliciousaccount，evenifitdoesnotstrikinglyresembletheoccurrence。Thestorymighthavebeenstillbetterifhehadnotintroducedtheshootingofthesoldierinthedark。Theincidentwasinvented，ofcourse，topresenttherealhorrorofwar，butitseemsincongruousinthisburlesquecampaign，and，tosomeextentatleast，itmissedfireinitsintention。

——[Inabookrecentlypublished，MarkTwain’s"nephew"isquotedasauthorityforthestatementthatMarkTwainwasdetailedforriverduty，captured，andparoled，capturedagain，andconfinedinatobacco—

warehouseinSt。Louis，etc。MarkTwainhadbutonenephew：SamuelE。

Moffett，whoseBiographicalSketch(vol。xxii，MarkTwain’sWorks)

containsnosuchstatement；andnothingofthesortoccurred。]

XXXI

OVERTHEHILLSANDFARAWAY

WhenMadameCaprellprophesiedthatOrionClemenswouldholdofficeundergovernment，shemusthaveseenwithtrueclairvoyantvision。TheinaugurationofAbrahamLincolnbroughtEdwardBatesintohisCabinet，andBateswasOrion’sfriend。Orionappliedforsomething，andgotit。

JamesW。NyehadbeenappointedTerritorialgovernorofNevada，andOrionwasmadeTerritorialsecretary。Youcouldstrainapointandrefertotheofficeas"secretaryofstate，"whichwasanimposingtitle。

Furthermore，thesecretarywouldbeactinggovernorinthegovernor’sabsence，andtherewouldbevarioussubsidiaryhonors。WhenLieutenantClemensarrivedinKeokuk，Orionwasinthefirstflushofhistriumphandneededonlymoneytocarryhimtothesceneofnewendeavor。ThelatelieutenantC。S。A。hadaccumulatedmoneyoutofhispilotsalary，andtherewasnocomfortableplacejustthenintheactiveMiddleWestforanofficerofeitherarmywhohadvoluntarilyretiredfromtheservice。HeagreedthatifOrionwouldoverlookhisrecentbriefdefectionfromtheUnionandappointhimnowashis(Orion’s)secretary，hewouldsupplythefundsforbothoverlandpassages，andtheywouldstartwithnounnecessarydelayforacountrysonewthatallhumanbeings，regardlessofpreviousaffiliationsandconvictions，wereflungintothecommonfusing—potandrecastinthegeneralmoldofpioneer。

TheofferwasaboontoOrion。Hewasalwayseagertoforgive，andthemoneywasvitallynecessary。Inthebriefestpossibletimehehadpackedhisbelongings，whichincludedalargeunabridgeddictionary，andthebrotherswereontheirwaytoSt。Louisforfinalleave—takingbeforesettingoutforthegreatmysteriouslandofpromise——thePacificWest。

>FromSt。LouistheytooktheboatforSt。Jo，whencetheOverlandstagestarted，andforsixdays"plodded"uptheshallow，muddy，snaggyMissouri，anewexperienceforthepilotoftheFatherofWaters。

Infact，theboatmightalmostaswellhavegonetoSt。Jobyland，forshewaswalkingmostofthetime，anyhow——climbingoverreefsandclamberingoversnagspatientlyandlaboriouslyalldaylong。

Thecaptainsaidshewasa"bully"boat，andallshewantedwassome"shear"andabiggerwheel。Ithoughtshewantedapairofstilts，butIhadthedeepsagacitynottosayso。’——[’RoughingIt’。]——

AtSt。Jotheypaidonehundredandfiftydollarsapiecefortheirstagefare(withsomethingextraforthedictionary)，andonthetwenty—sixthofJuly，1861，setoutonthatlong，delightfultripbehindsixteengallopinghorses——ormules——neverstoppingexceptformealsortochangeteams，headingsteadilyintothesunset，followingitfromhorizontohorizonoverthebillowyplains，acrossthesnow—cladRockies，coveringtheseventeenhundredmilesbetweenSt。JoandCarsonCity(includingatwo—dayhaltinSaltLakeCity)innineteengloriousdays。Whataninspirationinsuchatrip！In’RoughingIt’hetellsitall，andsays：

"Evenatthisdayitthrillsmethroughandthroughtothinkofthelife，thegladness，andthewildsenseoffreedomthatusedtomaketheblooddanceinmyfaceonthosefineOverlandmornings。"

Thenights，withtheunevenmail—bagsforabedandtheboundingdictionaryforcompany，werelessexhilarating；butthenyouthdoesnotmind。

Allthingsbeingnowready，stowedtheuneasydictionarywhereitwouldlieasquietaspossible，andplacedthewater—canteenandpistolswherewecouldfindtheminthedark。Thenwesmokedafinalpipeandswappedafinalyarn；afterwhichweputthepipes，tobacco，andbagofcoininsnugholesandcavesamongthemail—

bags，andmadetheplaceasdarkastheinsideofacow，astheconductorphraseditinhispicturesqueway。Itwascertainlyasdarkasanyplacecouldbe——nothingwasevendimlyvisibleinit。

Andfinallywerolledourselvesuplikesilkworms，eachpersoninhisownblanket，andsankpeacefullytosleep。

Youthlovesthatsortofthing，despiteitsinconvenience。Andsometimestheclatterofthepony—ridersweptbyinthenight，carryinglettersatfivedollarsapieceandmakingtheOverlandtripineightdays；justaquickbeatofhoofsinthedistance，adash，andahailfromthedarkness，thebeatofhoofsagain，thenonlytherumbleofthestageandtheeven，swinginggallopofthemules。Sometimestheygotaglimpseoftheponyriderbyday——aflash，asitwere，ashespedby。Andeverymorningbroughtnewscenery，newphasesoffrontierlife，including，atlast，whatwastothemthestrangestphaseofall，Mormonism。

TheyspenttwowonderfuldaysatSaltLakeCity，thatmysteriousandremotecapitalofthegreatAmericanmonarchy，whostillflauntsherlawless，orthodoxcreedthereligionofDavidandSolomon——andthrives。

Anobligingofficialmadeithisbusinesstoshowthemthecityandthelifethere，theresultofwhichwouldbethoseamusingchaptersin’RoughingIt’byandby。TheOverlandtravelerssetoutrefreshedfromSaltLakeCity，andwithanewsupplyofdelicacies——ham，eggs，andtobacco——thingsthatmakesuchatripworthwhile。Theauthorof’RoughingIt’assuresusofthis：

Nothinghelpsscenerylikehamandeggs。Hamandeggs，andaftertheseapipe——anold，rank，deliciouspipe——hamandeggsandscenery，a"down—grade，"aflyingcoach，afragrantpipe，andacontentedheart——thesemakehappiness。Itiswhatalltheageshavestruggledfor。

Butonemustreadallthestoryofthatlong—agotrip。Itwasatripsowellworthtaking，sowellworthrecording，sowellworthreadingandrereadingto—day。Wecanonlyreadofitnow。TheOverlandstagelongagomadeitslasttrip，andwillnotstartanymore。Evenifitdid，thelifeandconditions，theverysceneryitself，wouldnotbethesame。