第10章

DEARJim，——Irememberthatoldnightjustaswell！AndsomewhereamongmyrelicsIhaveyourremembrancestoredaway。Itmakesmyheartacheyettocalltomindsomeofthosedays。Stillitshouldn’t，forrightinthedepthsoftheirpovertyandtheirpocket—huntingvagabondagelaythegermofmycominggoodfortune。

YouremembertheonegleamofjollitythatshotacrossourdismalsojournintherainandmudofAngel’sCamp——Imeanthatdaywesataroundthetavernstoveandheardthatchaptellaboutthefrogandhowtheyfilledhimwithshot。AndyourememberhowwequotedfromtheyarnandlaughedoveritoutthereonthehillsidewhileyouanddearoldStokerpannedandwashed。Ijottedthestorydowninmynote—bookthatday，andwouldhavebeengladtogettenorfifteendollarsforit——Iwasjustthatblind。Butthenweweresohardup。

Ipublishedthatstory，anditbecamewidelyknowninAmerica，India，China，England，andthereputationitmadeformehaspaidmethousandsandthousandsofdollarssince。FourorfivemonthsagoI

boughtintotheExpress(Ihaveordereditsenttoyouaslongasyoulive，andifthebookkeepersendsyouanybillsyouletmehearofit)。Iwentheavilyindebt——nevercouldhavedaredtodothat，Jim，ifwehadn’theardthejumpingFrogstorythatday。

Andwouldn’tIlovetotakeoldStokerbythehand，andwouldn’tI

lovetoseehiminhisgreatspecialty，hiswonderfulrenditionofRinaldsinthe"BurningShame！"WhereisDickandwhatishedoing？

Givehimmyferventloveandwarmoldremembrances。

Aweekfromto—dayIshallbemarried—toagirlevenbetterandlovelierthanthepeerless"ChapparalQuails。"Youcan’tcomesofar，Jim，butstillIcordiallyinviteyoutocomeanyhow，andI

inviteDicktoo。Andifyoutwoboysweretolandhereonthatpleasantoccasionwewouldmakeyourightroyallywelcome。

Trulyyourfriend，SAML。L。CLEMENS。

P。S。———Californiaplumsaregood。Jim，particularlywhentheyarestewed。

Ithadbeenonlyfiveyearsbefore——thatdayinAngel’sCamp——buthowlongagoandhowfarawayitseemedtohimnow！Somuchhadhappenedsincethen，somuchofwhichthatwasthebeginning——solittlecomparedwiththemarveloftheyearsahead，whosethresholdhewasnowabouttocross，andnotalone。

AdayortwobeforetheweddinghewasaskedtolectureonthenightofFebruary2d。Herepliedthathewassorrytodisappointtheapplicant，butthathecouldnotlectureonthenightofFebruary2d，forthereasonthathewasgoingtomarryayoungladyonthatevening，andthathewouldrathermarrythatyoungladythandeliverallthelecturesintheworld。

Andsocamethewedding—day。Itbeganpleasantly；thepostmanbroughtaroyaltycheckthatmorningof$4，000，theaccumulationofthreemonths’

sales，andtheRev。JosephTwichellandHarmony，hiswife，camefromHartford——TwichelltojoinwiththeRev。ThomasK。Beecherinsolemnizingthemarriage。PamelaMoffett，awidownow，withherdaughterAnnie，growntoayounglady，hadcomeallthewayfromSt。Louis，andMrs。FairbanksfromCleveland。

Yettheguestswerenotnumerous，notmorethanahundredatmost，soitwasaquietweddingthereintheLangdonparlors，thosedim，statelyroomsthatinthefuturewouldholdsomuchofhishistory——somuchofthestoryoflifeanddeaththatmadeitsbeginningthere。

Thewedding—servicewasaboutseveno’clock，forMr。Beecherhadameetingatthechurchsoonafterthathour。Afterwardfollowedthewedding—supperanddancing，andthebride’sfatherdancedwiththebride。

TotheinterestedcrowdawaitinghimatthechurchMr。Beecherreportedthatthebridewasverybeautiful，andhadonthelongestwhitegloveshehadeverseen；hedeclaredtheyreachedtohershoulders。——[PerhapsforayoungergenerationitshouldbesaidthatThomasK。BeecherwasabrotherofHenryWardBeecher。HelivedanddiedinElmira，thealmostworshipedpastoroftheParkCongregationalChurch。Hewasanoble，unorthodoxteacher。SamuelClemensatthetimeofhismarriagealreadystronglyadmiredhim，andhadespousedhiscauseinanarticlesigned"S’cat！"intheElmiraAdvertiser，whenhe(Beecher)hadbeenassailedbythemoreorthodoxElmiraclergy。Forthe"S’cat"articleseeAppendixI，attheendoflastvolume。]

ItwasthenextafternoonwhentheysetoutforBuffalo，accompaniedbythebride’sparents，thegroom’srelatives，theBeechers，andperhapsoneortwoothersofthathappycompany。Itwasnineo’clockatnightwhentheyarrived，andfoundMr。Sleewaitingatthestationwithsleighstoconveythepartytothe"boarding—house"hehadselected。Theydroveanddrove，andthesleighcontainingthebrideandgroomgotbehindandapparentlywasboundnowhereinparticular，whichdisturbedthegroomagooddeal，forhethoughtitproperthattheyshouldarrivefirst，toreceivetheirguests。HecommentedonSlee’spoorjudgmentinselectingahousethatwassohardtofind，andwhenatlengththeyturnedintofashionableDelawareAvenue，andstoppedbeforeoneofthemostattractiveplacesintheneighborhood，hewasbesetwithfearconcerningtherichnessofthelocality。

Theywereonthestepswhenthedoorsopened，andaperfectfairylandoflightsanddecorationwasrevealedwithin。Thefriendswhohadgoneaheadcameoutwithgreetings，toleadinthebrideandgroom。Servantshurriedforwardtotakebagsandwraps。Theywereusheredinside；theywereledthroughbeautifulrooms，allnewlyappointedandgarnished。Thebridegroomwasdazed，unabletounderstandthemeaningofthings，theapparentownershipandcompletenessofpossession。

Atlasttheyoungwifeputherhanduponhisarm：

"Don’tyouunderstand，Youth，"shesaid；thatwasalwayshernameforhim。"Don’tyouunderstand？Itisours，allours——everything——agiftfromfather！"

Buteventhenhecouldnotgraspit；notatfirst，notuntilMr。Langdonbroughtalittleboxand，openingit，handedthemthedeeds。

NobodyquiterememberswhatwasthefirstremarkthatSamuelClemensmadethen；buteitherthenoralittlelaterhesaid：

"Mr。Langdon，wheneveryouareinBuffalo，ifit’stwiceayear，comerighthere。Bringyourbagandstayovernightifyouwantto。Itsha’n’tcostyouacent！"

Theywentintosupperthen，andbyandbytheguestsweregoneandtheyoungweddedpairwerealone。

PatrickMcAleer，theyoungcoachman，whowouldgrowoldintheiremploy，andEllen，thecook，cameinfortheirmorningorders，andwerefullofIrishdelightattheinexperienceandnoveltyofitall。Thentheyweregone，andonlytheloversintheirnewhouseandtheirnewhappinessremained。

Andsoitwastheyenteredtheenchantedland。

LXXV

ASTODESTINY

Ifanyreaderhasfollowedthesechaptersthusfar，hemayhavewondered，evenifvaguely，attheseemingfatalityofevents。MarkTwainhadbuttoreviewhisownlifeforjustificationofhisdoctrineofinevitability——anunbrokenandimmutablesequenceofcauseandeffectfromthebeginning。Oncehesaid：

"WhenthefirstlivingatomfounditselfafloatonthegreatLaurentianseathefirstactofthatfirstatomledtothesecondactofthatfirstatom，andsoondownthroughthesucceedingagesofalllife，until，ifthestepscouldbetraced，itwouldbeshownthatthefirstactofthatfirstatomhasledinevitablytotheactofmystandinghereinmydressing—gownatthisinstanttalkingtoyou。"

Itseemedtheclearestpresentmenteverofferedinthematterofpredestinedcircumstance——predestinedfromtheinstantwhenthatprimalatomfeltthevitalthrill。MarkTwain’searlylife，howeverimperfectlyrecorded，exemplifiesthispostulate。Ifthroughtheyearsstillaheadofusthecourseofdestinyseemslessclearlydefined，itisonlybecausethrongingeventsmakethethreadslesseasytotrace。Thewebbecomesricher，thepatternmoreintricateandconfusing，butthelineoffateneitherbreaksnorfalters，totheend。

LXXVI

ONTHEBUFFALO"EXPRESS"

WiththebeginningoflifeinBuffalo，MarkTwainhadbecomealreadyaworldcharacter——amanoflargeconsequenceandevents。Hehadnoproperrealizationofthis，norealsenseofthesizeofhisconquest；hestillregardedhimselfmerelyasalecturerandjournalist，temporarilypopular，butwithnowarranttoapermanentseatintheworld’sliterarycongress。Hethoughthissuccesssomethingofanaccident。Thefactthathewaspreparedtosettledownasaneditorialcontributortoanewspaperinwhatwasthenonlyabigvillageisthebestevidenceofamodestestimateofhistalents。

He"workedlikeahorse，"istheverdictofthosewhowerecloselyassociatedwithhimontheExpress。Hishourswerenotregular，buttheywerelong。Oftenhewasathisdeskateightinthemorning，andremainedthereuntiltenorelevenatnight。

Hisworkingcostumewassuitedtocomfortratherthanshow。Withcoat，vest，collar，andtieusuallyremoved(sometimesevenhisshoes)，heloungedinhischair，inanyattitudethataffordedthelargerease，pullingovertheexchanges；scribblingparagraphs，editorials，humorousskits，andwhatnot，asthenotioncameuponhim。J。L。Lamed，hisco—

worker(hesatontheoppositesideofthesametable)，remembersthatMarkTwainenjoyedhisworkashewentalong——thehumorofit——andthathefrequentlylaughedassomewhimsicalityornewabsurditycameintohismind。

"Idoubt，"writesLamed，"ifheeverenjoyedanythingmorethanthejackknifeengravingthathedidonapieceofboardofamilitarymapofthesiegeofParis，whichwasprintedintheExpressfromhisoriginalplate，withaccompanyingexplanationsandcomments。Hishalf—dayofwhittlingandlaughterthatwentwithitaresomethingthatIfindpleasanttoremember。Indeed，mywholeexperienceofassociationwithhimisahappymemory，whichIamfortunateinhaving……WhatonesawofhimwasalwaystheactualMarkTwain，actingoutofhisownnaturesimply，frankly，withoutpretense，andalmostwithoutreserve。Itwasthatsimplicityandnaturalnessinthemanwhichcarriedhisgreatestcharm。"

Lamed，likemanyothers，likensMarkTwaintoLincolninvariousofhischaracteristics。Thetwoworkedharmoniouslytogether：Lamedattendingtothepoliticaldirectionofthejournal，Clemenstotheliterary，andwhatmightbetermedthesentimentalside。Therewasnofrictioninthedivisionoflabor，neveranythingbutgoodfeelingbetweenthem。Clemenshadapooropinionofhisowncomprehensionofpolitics，andperhapsaslittleregardforLamed’sconceptionofhumor。Oncewhenthelatterattemptedsomethinginthewayofpleasantryhisassociatesaid：

"Betterleavethehumoronthispapertome，Lamed"；andoncewhenLamedwasawayattendingtheRepublicanStateConventionatSaratoga，andsomeeditorialcommentseemednecessary，Clemensthoughtitbesttosigntheutterance，andtomakehumorofhisshortcomings。

Idonotknowmuchaboutpolitics，andamnotsittingupnightstolearn……

Iamsatisfiedthatthesenominationsareallrightandsound，andthattheyaretheonlyonesthatcanbringpeacetoourdistractedcountry(theonlypoliticalphraseIamperfectlyfamiliarwithandcompetenttohurlatthepublicwithfearlessconfidence——theothereditorisfullofthem)，butbeingmerelysatisfiedisnotenough。

IalwaysliketoknowbeforeIshout。ButIgoforMr。Curtiswithallmystrength！Beingcertainofhim，IherebyshoutallIknowhow。Buttheothersmaybeasplitticket，orascratchedticket，orwhateveryoucallit。

Iwillletitaloneforthepresent。Itwillkeep。Theotheryoungmanwillbebackto—morrow，andhewillshoutforit，splitornosplit，restassuredofthat。Hewillpranceintothispoliticalringwithhistomahawkandhiswar—whoop，andthenyouwillhearacrashandseethescalpsfly。Hehasnoneofmydiffidence。Heknowsallaboutthesenominees，andifhedon’thewillletontoinsuchanaturalwayastodeceivethemostcritical。Heknowseverything——heknowsmorethanWebster’sUnabridgedandtheAmericanEncyclopedia——butwhetherheknowsanythingaboutasubjectornotheisperfectlywillingtodiscussit。Whenhegetsbackhewilltellyouallaboutthesecandidatesasserenelyasifhehadbeenacquaintedwiththemahundredyears，though，speakingconfidentially，Idoubtifheeverheardofanyofthemtillto—day。

Iamrightwellsatisfieditisagood，sound，sensibleticket，andatickettowin；butwaittillhecomes。

InthemeantimeIgoforGeorgeWilliamCurtisandtakethechances。

MARKTWAIN。

HehadbecomewhatMr。Howellscallsentirely"deSouthernized"bythistime。Fromhavingbeenofslaveholdingstock，andaConfederatesoldier，hehadbecomeamostpositiveRepublican，arampantabolitionist——hadtherebeenanythinglefttoabolish。Hissympathyhadbeenalwayswiththeoppressed，andhehadnowbecometheirdefender。Hisworkonthepaperrevealedthismoreandmore。Hewrotefewersketchesandmoreeditorials，andtheeditorialswerelikelytobeeithersavageassaultsuponsomehumanabuse，orfierceespousalsoftheweak。Theywerefearless，scathing，terrific。OfsomefarmersofCohocton，whohadtakenthelawintotheirownhandstopunishacouplewhomtheybelievedtobeadetrimenttothecommunity，hewrote：

"Themenwhodidthatdeedarecapableofdoinganylow，sneaking，cowardlyvillainythatcouldbeinventedinperdition。Theyaretheverybastardsofthedevil。"

Heappendedafulllistoftheirnames，andadded：

"IfthefarmersofCohoctonareofthiscomplexion，whatonearthmustaCohoctonroughbelike？"

Butallthishappenedalongtimeago，andweneednotdetailthosevariousoldinterestsandlaborshere。ItisenoughtosaythatMarkTwainontheExpresswaswhathehadbeenfromthebeginning，andwouldbetotheend——thezealouschampionofjusticeandliberty；violentandsometimeswronginhisviewpoint，butneverlessthanfearlessandsincere。Invariablyhewasfortheoppressed。Hehadanaturalinstinctfortheright，but，rightorwrong，hewasfortheunderdog。

AmongthebestofhiseditorialcontributionsisatributetoAnsonBurlingame，whodiedFebruary23，1870，atSt。Petersburg，onhistriparoundtheworldasspecialambassadorfortheChineseEmpire。InthiseditorialClemensendeavoredtopaysomethingofhisdebttothenoblestatesman。HereviewedBurlingame’sastonishingcareer——thecareerwhichhadclosedatforty—seven，andreadlikeafairy—tale—andhedweltlovinglyonhishero’snobilityofcharacter。Attheclosehesaid：

"Hewasagoodman，andavery，verygreatman。America，lostason，andalltheworldaservant，whenhedied。"

AmongthoseearlycontributionstotheExpressisaseriescalled"AroundtheWorld，"anattemptatcollaborationwithProf。D。R。Ford，whodidtheactualtraveling，whileMarkTwain，writinginthefirstperson，gavethelettershisliterarystamp。Atleastsomeofthecontributionswerewritteninthisway，suchas"AdventuresinHayti，""ThePacific，"and"Japan。"Theselettersexistto—dayonlyintheoldfilesoftheExpress，andindeedthisisthecasewithmostofClemens’sworkforthatpaper。Itwasmainlyephemeralortimelywork，anditslargervaluehasdisappeared。Hereandthereisasentenceworthremembering。Oftwopracticaljokerswhosentinamarriagenoticeofpersonsnotevencontemplatingmatrimony，hesaid："Thisdeceithasbeenpractisedmaliciouslybyacoupleofmenwhosesmallsoulswillescapethroughtheirporessomedayiftheydonotvarnishtheirhides。"

Someofthesketcheshavebeenpreserved。"JournalisminTennessee，"oneofthebestofhiswilderburlesques，isasenjoyableto—dayaswhenwritten。"ACuriousDream"madealastingimpressiononhisBuffaloreaders，andyouareprettycertaintohearofitwhenyoumentionMarkTwaininthatcityto—day。ItvividlycalledattentiontotheneglectoftheoldNorthStreetgraveyard。Thegruesomevisionoftheancestorsdesertingwiththeircoffinsontheirbackswasevenmorehumiliatingthanamusing，andinspiredamovementforreform。Ithasbeeneffectiveelsewheresincethen，andmaystillbereadwithprofit——orsatisfaction——forinanoteattheendthereaderisassuredthatifthecemeteriesofhistownarekeptingoodorderthedreamisnotleveledathistownatall，but"particularlyandvenomouslyatthenexttown。"

LXXVII

THE"GALAXY"

MarkTwain’sworkontheExpressrepresentedonlyaportionofhisliteraryactivitiesduringhisBuffaloresidence。TheGalaxy，anambitiousNewYorkmagazineofthatday——[publishedbySheldon&Co。at498and500Broadway]——，proposedtohimthatheconductforthemahumorousdepartment。Theywouldpay$2，400ayearforthework，andallowhimafreehand。Therewassomediscussionastobookrights，butthearrangementwasconcluded，andhisfirstinstalment，underthegeneraltitleof"Memoranda，"appearedintheMaynumber，1870。InhisIntroductoryheoutlinedwhatthereadermightexpect，suchas"exhaustivestatisticaltables，""PatentOfficereports，"and"completeinstructionsaboutfarming，evenfromthegraftingoftheseedtotheharrowingofthematuredcrops。"Hedeclaredthathewouldthrowapathosintothesubjectofagriculturethatwouldsurpriseanddelighttheworld。Headdedthatthe"Memoranda"wasnotnecessarilyahumorousdepartment。

Iwouldnotconductanexclusivelyandprofessedlyhumorousdepartmentforanyone。Iwouldalwaysprefertohavetheprivilegeofprintingaseriousandsensibleremark，incaseoneoccurredtome，withoutthereader’sfeelingobligedtoconsiderhimselfoutraged……Punscannotbeallowedaplaceinthisdepartment……

Nocircumstance，howeverdismal，willeverbeconsideredasufficientexcusefortheadmissionofthatlastandsaddestevidenceofintellectualpoverty，thepun。

TheGalaxywasreallyafinemagazine，withthebestcontributorsobtainable；amongthemJustinMcCarthy，S。M。B。Piatt，RichardGrantWhite，andmanyotherswellknowninthatday，withnamesthatstillflickerhereandthereinitsliterarytwilight。ThenewdepartmentappealedtoClemens，andverysoonhewaswritingmostofhissketchesforit。Theywerebetterliterature，asarule，thanthosepublishedinhisownpaper。

Thefirstnumberofthe"Memoranda"wasfairlyrepresentativeofthosethatfollowedit。"TheFactsintheCaseoftheGreatBeefContract，"

amanuscriptwhichhehadundertakenthreeyearsbeforeandmislaid，wasitsinitialcontribution。Besidesthe"BeefContract，"therewasatributetoGeorgeWakeman，awell—knownjournalistofthosedays；astrictureontheRev。T。DeWittTalmage，whohaddeliveredfromthepulpitanargumentagainstworkingmenoccupyingpewsinfashionablechurches；apresentmentoftheChinesesituationinSanFrancisco，depictingthecrueltreatmentoftheCelestialimmigrant；aburlesqueoftheSunday—school"goodlittleboy"story，——["TheStoryoftheGoodLittleBoyWhoDidNotProsper"andthe"BeefContract"areincludedinSketchesNewandOld；alsotheChinesesketch，underthetitle，"DisgracefulPersecutionofaBoy。"]——andseveralshorterskits——andanecdotes，tenpagesinall；arathergenerouscontract。

MarkTwain’scommentonTalmagewaspromptedbyanarticleinwhichTalmagehadassumedthepremisethatifworkingmenattendedthechurchesitwoulddrivethebetterclassofworshipersaway。Amongotherthingshesaid：

IhaveagoodChristianfriendwho，ifhesatinthefrontpewinchurch，andaworkingmanshouldenterthedoorattheotherend，wouldsmellhiminstantly。Myfriendisnottoblameforthesensitivenessofhisnose，anymorethanyouwouldflogapointerforbeingkeeneronthescentthanastupidwatch—dog。Thefactis，ifyouhadallthechurchesfree，byreasonofthemixingofthecommonpeoplewiththeuncommon，youwouldkeepone—halfofChristendomsickattheirstomach。IfyouaregoingtokillthechurchthuswithbadsmellsIwillhavenothingtodowiththisworkofevangelization。

CommentingonthisMarkTwainsaid——well，hesaidagooddealmorethanwehaveroomforhere，butaportionofhisclosingparagraphsisworthpreserving。HecomparestheReverendMr。TalmagewiththeearlydisciplesofChrist——PaulandPeterandtheothers；or，rather，hecontrastshimwiththem。

Theyhealedtheverybeggars，andheldintercoursewithpeopleofavillainousodoreveryday。IfthesubjectoftheseremarkshadbeenchosenamongtheoriginalTwelveApostleshewouldnothaveassociatedwiththerest，becausehecouldnothavestoodthefishysmellofsomeofhiscomradeswhocamefromaroundtheSeaofGalilee。Hewouldhaveresignedhiscommissionwithsomesuchremarkashemakesintheextractquotedabove："Master，ifthouartgoingtokillthechurchthuswithbadsmellsIwillhavenothingtodowiththisworkofevangelization。"Heisadisciple，andmakesthatremarktotheMaster；theonlydifferenceisthathemakesitinthenineteenthinsteadofthefirstcentury。

Talmagewasimmenselypopularatthistime，andMarkTwain’sopenattackonhimmusthaveshockedagoodmanyGalaxyreaders，asperhapshisarticleontheChinesecrueltiesoffendedthecitizensofSanFrancisco。

Itdidnotmatter。Hewasnotlikelytoworryoverthefriendshewouldlosebecauseofanystandtakenforhumanjustice。Lamedsaidofhim：

"Hewasveryfarfrombeingonewhotriedinanywaytomakehimselfpopular。"Certainlyhenevermadeanysuchattemptattheexpenseofhisconvictions。

ThefirstGalaxyinstalmentwasasortofplatformofprinciplesforthecampaignthatwastofollow。Notthateachmonth’scontributioncontainedpersonalcriticism，oradefenseoftheChinese(ofwhomhewasalwaysthechampionaslongashelived)，butagoodmanyofthemdid。

IntheOctobernumberhebeganaseriesoflettersunderthegeneraltitleof"Goldsmith’sFriendAbroadAgain，"supposedtohavebeenwrittenbyaChineseimmigrantinSanFrancisco，detailinghisexperiencethere。

Inanotetheauthorsays："Noexperienceissetdowninthefollowingletterswhichhadtobeinvented。FancyisnotneededtogivevarietytothehistoryoftheChinaman’ssojourninAmerica。Plainfactisamplysufficient。"ThelettersshowhowthesupposedChinesewriterofthemhadsetoutforAmerica，believingittobealandwhosegovernmentwasbasedontheprinciplethatallmenarecreatedequal，andtreatedaccordingly；how，uponarrivinginSanFrancisco，hewaskickedandbruisedandbeaten，andsetuponbydogs，flungintojail，triedandcondemnedwithoutwitnesses，hisownracenotbeingallowedtotestifyagainstAmericans——Irish—Americans——intheSanFranciscocourt。Theyarescathing，powerfulletters，andonecannotreadthem，eveninthisdayofimprovedconditions，withoutfeelingthehotwavesofresentmentandindignationwhichMarkTwainmusthavefeltwhenhepennedthem。

ReverendMr。TalmagewasnottheonlydivinetoreceiveattentionintheMemoranda。"TheReverendMr。Sabine，ofNewYork，whohaddeclinedtoholdachurchburialservicefortheoldactor，GeorgeHolland，cameinforthemostcausticaswellasthemostartisticstrictureoftheentireseries。Itdeservespreservationto—day，notonlyforitsliteraryvalue，butbecausenofinerdefenseofthedrama，nomoresearchingsermononself—righteousness，haseverbeenputintoconcreteform。

——["TheIndignityPutUpontheRemainsofGorgeHollandbytheRev。Mr。

Sabine"；GalaxyforFebruary，1871。ThereaderwillfinditcompleteunderAppendixJ，attheendoflastvolume。]

The"LittleChurchAroundtheCorner"onTwenty—ninthStreetreceivedthathappytitlefromthisincident。

"Thereisalittlechurcharoundthecornerthatwill，perhaps，permittheservice，"Mr。SabinehadsaidtoHolland’sfriends。

Thelittlechurchdidpermittheservice，andtherewasconferreduponitthenewname，whichitstillbears。Ithasshelteredalonglineofactorfolkandtheirfriendssincethen，earningtherebyreverence，gratitude，andimmortalmemory。——[ChurchoftheTransfiguration。

MemorialserviceswereheldthereforJosephJefferson；andamemorialwindow，byJohnLaFarge，hasbeenplacedthereinmemoryofEdwinBooth。]

OftheGalaxycontributionsanumberarepreservedinSketchesNewandOld。"HowIEditedanAgriculturalPaper"isoneofthebestofthese——

anexcellentexampleofMarkTwain’smoreextravagantstyleofhumor。Itisperenniallydelightful；inFranceithasbeendramatized，andisstillplayed。

AsuccessfulGalaxyfeature，alsopreservedintheSketches，wasthe"BurlesqueMapofParis，"reprintedfromtheExpress。TheFranco—

PrussianWarwasinprogress，andthistravestywasparticularlytimely。

Itcreatesonlyasmileofamusementto—day，butitwasallfreshanddelightfulthen。SchuylerColfax，bythistimeVice—President，wrotetohim："Ihavehadtheheartiestpossiblelaughoverit，andsohaveallmyfamily。Youareawicked，consciencelesswag，whooughttobepunishedseverely。"

The"OfficialCommendations，"whichaccompanythemap，areitschiefcharm。TheyarefromGrant，Bismarck，BrighamYoung，andothers，thebestonecomingfromoneJ。Smith，whosays：

Mywifewasforyearsafflictedwithfreckles，andthougheverythingwasdoneforherreliefthatcouldbedone，allwasinvain。But，sir，sinceherfirstglanceatyourmaptheyhaveentirelylefther。

Shehasnothingbutconvulsionsnow。

Itissaidthatthe"MapofParis"founditswaytoBerlin，wheretheAmericanstudentsinthebeer—hallsusedtopretendtoquarreloverituntiltheyattractedtheattentionoftheGermansoldiersthatmightbepresent。Thentheywouldwanderawayandleaveitonthetableandwatchresults。Thesoldierswouldpounceuponitandlosetheirtempersoverit；thenfinallyabuseitandrevileitsauthor，tothesatisfactionofeverybody。

Thelargernumberof"Memoranda"sketcheshaveproperlyfoundoblivionto—day。Theywereall，ornearlyall，collectedbyaCanadianpirate，C。A。Backas，inavolumebearingthetitleofMemoranda，——[AlsobyaharpynamedJohnCamdenHotten(ofLondon)，ofwhomweshallhearagain。

HottenhadalreadypiratedTheInnocents，andhaditonthemarketbeforeRoutledgecouldbringouttheauthorizededition。Routledgelaterpublishedthe"Memoranda"underthetitleofSketches，includingthecontentsoftheJumpingFrogbook。]——abooklongagosuppressed。OnlyabouttwentyoftheGalaxycontributionsfoundplaceinSketchesNewandOld，fiveyearslater，andsomeofthesemighthavebeensparedasliterature。"ToRaisePoultry，""JohnChinamaninNewYork，"and"HistoryRepeatsItself"arevaluableonlyasexamplesofhisworkatthatperiod。Thereadermayconsultthemforhimself。

LXXVIII

THEPRIMROSEPATH

Butwearelosingsightofmoreimportantthings。FromtheverybeginningMarkTwain’shomemeantalwaysmoretohimthanhiswork。Thelifeat472DelawareAvenuehadbegunwithasfairapromiseasanymatrimonialjourneyeverundertaken：Thereseemednothinglacking：abeautifulhome，sufficientincome，brightprospects——thesethings，withhealthandlove；constitutemarriedhappiness。Mrs。Clemenswrotetohersister，Mrs。Crane，attheendofFebruary："Sue，wearetwoashappypeopleasyoueversaw。Ourdaysseemtobemadeupofonlybrightsunlight，withnoshadowinthem。"Inthesameletterthehusbandadded：

"Livypinesandpineseverydayforyou，andIpineandpineeverydayforyou，andwhenwebothofusarepiningatonceyouwouldthinkitwasawholepineforestletloose。"

ToRedpath，whowasurginglectureengagementsforthecomingseason，hewrote：

DEARRED，——Iamnotgoingtolectureanymoreforever。Ihavegotthingsciphereddowntoafractionnow。Iknowjustaboutwhatitwillcosttolive，andIcanmakethemoneywithoutlecturing。

Therefore，oldman，countmeout。

Andstilllater，inMay：

IguessIamoutofthefieldpermanently。Havegotalovelywife，alovelyhouse，bewitchinglyfurnished，alovelycarriage，andacoachmanwhosestyleanddignityaresimplyawe—in—spiring，nothingless；andIammakingmoremoneythannecessary，byconsiderable，andthereforewhycrucifymyselfnightlyontheplatform？Thesubscriberwillhavetobeexcusedforthepresentseasonatleast。

Sotheywereveryhappyduringthoseearlymonths，acquiringpleasantlytheeducationwhichanymatrimonialexperienceissuretofurnish，accustomingthemselvestotheusesofhousekeeping，tolifeinpartnership，withallthediscoveriesandmentalandspiritualadaptationsthatbelongtothecloseassociationofmarriage。Theywerefar，veryfar，apartonmanysubjects。Hewasunpolished，untrained，impulsive，sometimesviolent。Twichellremembersthatintheearlierdaysoftheiracquaintanceheworeaslouchhatpulleddowninfront，andsmokedacigarthatsometimestiltedupandtouchedthebrimofit。Theatmosphereandcustomsoffrontierlife，theWesternismsofthatday，stillclungtohim。Mrs。Clemens，ontheotherhand，wasconservative，dainty，cultured，spiritual。Headoredheraslittlelessthanasaint，andshebecame，indeed，hissavinggrace。Shehadallthepersonalrefinementwhichhelacked，andsheundertooktheworkofpolishingandpurifyingherlifecompanion。Shehadnowishtodestroyhispersonality，tomakehimover，butonlytopreservehisbest，andshesetaboutitintherightway——gently，andwithatendergratitudeineachachievement。

Shedidnotentirelyapproveofcertainlinesofhisreading；or，rather，shedidnotunderstandtheminthosedays。Thatheshouldbefondofhistoryandthescienceswasnaturalenough，butwhentheLifeofP。T。

Barnum，WrittenbyHimself，appeared，andhesatupnightstoabsorbit，andwokeearlyandlightedthelamptofollowthecareerofthegreatshowman，shewasatalosstocomprehendthisparticularliterarypassion，andindeedwasratherjealousofit。Shedidnotrealizethenhisvastinterestinthestudyofhumannature，orthatsuchabookcontainedwhatMr。Howellscalls"therootofthehumanmatter，"theinnerrevelationofthehumanbeingatfirsthand。

Concerninghisreligiousobservanceshertaskinthebeginningwaseasyenough。Clemenshadnotatthattimeformulatedanyparticulardoctrinesofhisown。Hisnaturalkindnessofheart，andespeciallyhisloveforhiswife，inclinedhimtowardtheteachingsandcustomsofherChristianfaith——unorthodoxbutsincere，asChristianityintheLangdonfamilywaslikelytobe。Ittookverylittlepersuasiononhiswife’sparttoestablishfamilyprayersintheirhome，gracebeforemeals，andthemorningreadingofaBiblechapter。JoeGoodman，whomadeatripEast，andvisitedthemduringtheearlydaysoftheirmarriedlife，wasdumfoundedtoseeMarkTwainaskablessingandjoininfamilyworship。

Justhowlongtheseformscontinuedcannotbeknownto—day；thetimeoftheirabandonmenthasperishedfromtherecollectionofanyonenowliving。

ItwouldseemtohavebeentheBible—readingthatwroughtthechange。

Theprayerandtheblessingweretohimsincereandgracious；butasthereadingscontinuedherealizedthathehadneverbeforeconsideredtheBiblefromadoctrinalpointofview，asaguidetospiritualsalvation。

Tohislogicalreasoningmind，alargeportionofitseemedabsurd：amassoffablesandtraditions，meremythology。Fromsuchmaterialhumanityhadbuiltitsmightiestedificeofhope，thedoctrinesofitsfaith。Afteralittlewhilehecouldstanditnolonger。

"Livy，"hesaidoneday，"youmaykeepthisupifyouwantto，butImustaskyoutoexcusemefromit。Itismakingmeahypocrite。Idon’tbelieveinthisBible。Itcontradictsmyreason。Ican’tsithereandlistentoit，lettingyoubelievethatIregardit，asyoudo，inthelightofgospel，thewordofGod。"

HewasmovedtowriteanarticleonthehumanideaofGod，ancientandmodern。Itcontainedtheseparagraphs：

Thedifferenceinimportance，betweentheGodoftheBibleandtheGodofthepresentday，cannotbedescribed，itcanonlybevaguelyandinadequatelyfiguredtothemind……Ifyoumakefigurestorepresenttheearthandmoon，andallowaspaceofoneinchbetweenthem，torepresentthefourhundredthousandmilesofdistancewhichliesbetweenthetwobodies，themapwillhavetobeelevenmileslonginordertobringinthenearestfixedstar。——

[Hisfigureswerefartoosmall。Amapdrawnonthescaleof400，000milestotheinchwouldneedtobe1，100mileslongtotakeinboththeearthandthenearestfixedstar。Onsuchamaptheearthwouldbeone—fiftiethofaninchindiameter——thesizeofasmallgrainofsand。]——Soonecannotputthemodernheavensonamap，northemodernGod；buttheBibleGodandtheBibleheavenscanbesetdownonaslateandyetnotbediscommoded……

Thedifferencebetweenthatuniverseandthemodernonerevealedbyscienceisasthedifferencebetweenadust—fleckedrayinabarnandthesublimearchoftheMilkyWayintheskies。ItsGodwasstrictlyproportionedtoitsdimensions。Hissolesolicitudewasaboutahandfuloftruculentnomads。Heworriedandfrettedovertheminapeculiarlyanddistractinglyhumanway。Onedayhecoaxedandpettedthembeyondtheirdue，thenextheharriedandlashedthembeyondtheirdeserts。Hesulked，hecursed，heraged，hegrieved，accordingtohismoodandthecircumstances，butalltonopurpose；hiseffortswereallvain，hecouldnotgovernthem。Whenthefurywasonhimhewasblindtoallreason——henotonlyslaughteredtheoffender，butevenhisharmlesslittlechildrenanddumbcattle……

TotrusttheGodoftheBibleistotrustanirascible，vindictive，fierceandeverfickleandchangefulmaster；totrustthetrueGodistotrustaBeingwhohasutterednopromises，butwhosebeneficent，exact，andchangelessorderingofthemachineryofhiscolossaluniverseisproofthatheisatleaststeadfasttohispurposes；whoseunwrittenlaws，sofarastheyaffectman，beingequalandimpartial，showthatheisjustandfair；thesethings，takentogether，suggestthatifheshallordainustolivehereafter，hewillstillbesteadfast，just，andfairtowardus。Weshallnotneedtorequireanythingmore。

Itseemsmildenough，obvious，evenorthodox，now——sofarhavewetraveledinfortyyears。Butsuchadeclarationthenwouldhaveshockedagreatnumberofsincerelydevoutpersons。Hiswifeprevaileduponhimnottoprintit。Sherespectedhishonesty——evenhisreasoning，buthisdoubtswerealonggrieftoher，nevertheless。Intimeshesawmoreclearlywithhisvision，butthiswaslongafter，whenshehadlivedmorewiththeworld，hadbecomemorefamiliarwithitslargerneeds，andtheproportionsofcreatedthings。

TheydidnotminglemuchorlongwiththesociallifeofBuffalo。Theyreceivedandreturnedcalls，attendedanoccasionalreception；butneitherofthemfoundsuchthingsespeciallyattractiveinthosedays，sotheyremainedmoreandmoreintheirownenvironment。Thereisananecdotewhichseemstobelonghere。

OneSundaymorningClemensnoticedsmokepouringfromtheupperwindowofthehouseacrossthestreet。Theownerandhiswife，comparativelynewcomers，wereseatedupontheveranda，evidentlynotawareofimpendingdanger。TheClemenshouseholdthusfarhaddelayedcallingonthem，butClemenshimselfnowsteppedbrisklyacrossthestreet。Bowingwithleisurelypoliteness，hesaid：

"MynameisClemens；weoughttohavecalledonyoubefore，andIbegyourpardonforintrudingnowinthisinformalway，butyourhouseisonfire。"

AlmosttheonlyintimatefriendstheyhadinBuffalowereinthefamilyofDavidGray，thepoet—editoroftheCourier。Graywasagentle，lovableman。"Thegentlestspiritandtheloveliestthateverwentclothedinclay，sinceSirGalahadlaidhimtorest，"MarkTwainoncesaidofhim。BothGrayandClemenswerefriendsofJohnHay，andtheirfamiliessoonbecameintimate。Perhaps，intime，theClemenshouseholdwouldhavefoundotherasgoodfriendsintheBuffalocircles；butheavycloudsthathadlainunseenjustbeyondthehorizonduringthoseearliermonthsofmarriagerosesuddenlyintoview，andthesociallife，whateveritmighthavebecome，wasnolongeraconsideration。

LXXIX

THEOLDHUMANSTORY

JervisLangdonwasneverabletoaccepthisson—in—law’sinvitationtothenewhome。Hishealthbegantofailthatspring，andattheendofMarch，withhisphysicianandMrs。Langdon，hemadeatriptotheSouth。

InaletterwrittenatRichmondhesaid，"Ihavethrownoffallcare，"

andnamedalistofthefourgreatinterestsinwhichhewasinvolved。

Under"number5，"heincluded"everything，"adding，"soyouseehowgoodIamtofollowthecounselofmychildren。"Heclosed："Samuel，Iloveyourwifeandshelovesme。Ithinkitisonlyfairthatyoushouldknowit，butyouneednotflareup。Ilovedherbeforeyoudid，andshelovedmebeforeshedidyou，andhasnotceasedsince。Iseenowaybutforyoutomakethemostofit。"Hewasalreadyaveryillman，andthischeerfulletterwasamongthelastheeverwrote。

Hewasabsentsixweeksandseemedtoimprove，butsufferedanattackearlyinMay；inJunehisconditionbecamecritical。ClemensandhiswifeweresummonedtoElmira，andjoinedinthenursing，dayandnight。

Clemenssurprisedeveryonebyhisabilityasanurse。Hisdelicacyandthoughtfulnesswereunfailing；hisoriginalwaysofdoingthingsalwaysamusedandinterestedthepatient。InlateryearsMarkTwainoncesaid：

"HowmuchofthenursingdidIdo？Mymainwatchwasfrommidnighttofourinthemorning，nearlyfourhours。Myotherwatchwasamiddaywatch，andIthinkitwasnearlythreehours。Thetwosistersdividedtheremainingseventeenhoursofthetwenty—fourhoursbetweenthem，andeachofthemtriedgenerouslyandpersistentlytoswindletheotheroutofapartofherwatch。I

wenttobedearlyeverynight，andtriedtogetsleepenoughbymidnighttofitmeformywork，butitwasalwaysafailure。Iwentonwatchsleepyandremainedmiserable，sleepy，andwretched，straightalongthroughthefourhours。Icanstillseemyselfsittingbythatbedinthemelancholystillnessoftheswelteringnight，mechanicallywavingapalm—leaffanoverthedrawn，whitefaceofthepatient。Icanstillrecallmynoddings，myfleetingunconsciousness，whenthefanwouldcometoastandstillinmyhand，andIwokeupwithastartandahideousshock。DuringallthatdrearytimeIbegantowatchforthedawnlongbeforeitcame。Whenthefirstfaintgrayshowedthroughthewindow—blindsIfeltasnodoubtacastawayfeelswhenthedimthreadsofthelooked—forshipappearagainstthesky。Iwaswellandstrong，butIwasaman，afflictedwithaman’sinfirmity——lackofendurance。"

Healwaysdealtwithhimselfinthisunsparingway；butthosewhowereabouthimthenhaveleftadifferentstory。

Itwasallwithoutavail。Mr。Langdonrallied，andearlyinJulytherewashopeforhisrecovery。Hefailedagain，andontheafternoonofthe6thofAugusthedied。ToMrs。Clemens，delicateandgreatlywornwiththeanxietyandstrainofwatching，theblowwasacrushingone。ItwasthebeginningofaseriesofdisasterswhichwouldmarktheentireremainingperiodoftheirBuffaloresidence。

TherehadbeenapartialplanforspendingthesummerinEngland，andamoredefiniteoneforjoiningtheTwichellsintheAdirondacks。Bothoftheseprojectswerenowabandoned。Mrs。Clemensconcludedthatshewouldbebetterathomethananywhereelse，andinvitedanoldschoolfriend，aMissEmmaNye，tovisither。

ButtheshadowofdeathhadnotbeenliftedfromtheClemenshousehold。

MissNyepresentlyfellillwithtyphoidfever。Therefollowedanotherlongperiodofanxietyandnursing，endingwiththedeathofthevisitorinthenewhome，September29th。Theyoungwifewasnowinverydelicatehealth；genuinelyill，infact。Thehappyhomehadbecomeaplaceofsorrow—oftroublednightsanddays。Anotherfriendcametocheerthem，andonthisfriend’sdepartureMrs。Clemensdrovetotherailwaystation。

Itwasahurriedtripoverroughstreetstocatchthetrain。Shewasprostratedonherreturn，andalittlelater，November7，1870，herfirstchild，Langdon，wasprematurelyborn。Adangerousillnessfollowed，andcompleterecoverywaslongdelayed。Butonthel2ththecrisisseemedpassed，andthenewfatherwroteaplayfullettertotheTwichells，ascomingfromthelatearrival：

DEARUNCLEANDAUNT，——Icameintotheworldonthe7thinst。，andconsequentlyamaboutfivedaysoldnow。IhavehadwretchedhealtheversinceImademyappearance……Iamnotcorpulent，noramIrobustinanyway。AtbirthIonlyweighedfourandone—halfpoundswithmyclotheson——andtheclotheswerethechieffeatureoftheweight，too，Iamobligedtoconfess，butIamdoingfinely，allthingsconsidered……Mylittlemotherisverybrightandcheery，andIguesssheisprettyhappy，butIdon’tknowwhatabout。Shelaughsagreatdeal，notwithstandingsheissickabed。

P。S。——FathersaysIhadbetterwritebecauseyouwillbemoreinterestedinme，justnow，thanintherestofthefamily。

AweeklaterClemens，ashimself，wrote：

Livyisupandtheprincekeepsherbusyandanxioustheselatterdaysandnights，butIamabachelorup—stairsanddon’thavetojumpupandgetthesoothingsirup，thoughIwouldassoondoitasnot，Iassureyou。(Livywillbecertaintoreadthisletter。)

TellHarmonythatIdoholdthebaby，anddoitprettyhandilytoo，thoughwithoccasionalapprehensionsthathislooseheadwillfalloff。Idon’thavetoquiethim；hehardlyeveruttersacry。Heisalwaysthinkingaboutsomething。Heisapatient，goodlittlebaby。

Furtheralonghereferstooneofhisreforms：

Smoke？IalwayssmokefromthreetillfiveonSundayafternoons，andinNewYork，theotherday，Ismokedaweek，dayandnight。ButwhenLivyiswellIsmokeonlythosetwohoursonSunday。I’mbossofthehabitnow，andshallneverletitbossmeanymore。

OriginallyIquitsolelyonLivy’saccount(notthatIbelievedtherewasthefaintestreasoninthematter，butjustasIwoulddeprivemyselfofsugarinmycoffeeifshewishedit，orquitwearingsocksifshethoughtthemimmoral)，andIsticktoityetonLivy’saccount，andshallalwayscontinuetodosowithoutapang。

Butsomehowitseemsapitythatyouquit，forMrs。T。didn’tmindit，ifIrememberrightly。Ah，itisturningone’sbackuponakindlyProvidencetospurnawayfromusthegoodcreaturehesenttomakethebreathoflifealuxuryaswellasanecessity，enjoyableaswellasuseful。Togoquitsmoking，whenthereain’tanysufficientexcuseforit！——why，myoldboy，whentheyusedtotellmeIwouldshortenmylifetenyearsbysmoking，theylittleknewthedevoteetheywerewastingtheirpuerilewordsupon；theylittleknewhowtrivialandvaluelessIwouldregardadecadethathadnosmokinginit！ButIwon’tpersuadeyou，Twichell——Iwon’tuntilI

seeyouagain——butthenwe’llsmokeforaweektogether，andthenshutoffagain。

LXXX

LITERARYPROJECTS

ThesuccessoftheInnocentsnaturallymadeathriftypublisherlikeBlissanxiousforasecondexperiment。Hehadbegunearlyintheyeartotalkaboutanotherbook，butnothinghadcomeofitbeyondaprojectortwo，moreorlesshazyandunpursued。ClemensatonetimedevelopedaplanforaNoah’sArkbook，whichwastodetailthecruiseoftheArkindiarieskeptbyvariousmembersofit—Shem，Ham，andtheothers。Hereallywrotesomeofitatthetime，anditwasanideaheneverentirelylosttrackof。Allalongamonghismanuscriptsappearfragmentsfromthoseancientvoyagers。Oneoftheearlierentrieswillshowthestyleandpurposeoftheundertaking。ItisfromShem’srecord：

Friday：Papa’sbirthday。Heis600yearsold。Wecelebrateditinabig，blacktent。Principalmenofthetribepresent。Afterwardtheywereshownovertheark，whichwaslookingdesolateandemptyanddrearyonaccountofamisunderstandingwiththeworkmenaboutwages。Methuselahwasasfreewithhiscriticismsasusual，andasvolubleandfamiliar，whichIandmybrothersdonotlike；forwearepastouronehundredthyearandmarried。HestillcallsmeShemmy，justashedidwhenIwasachildofsixty。Iamstillbutayouth，itistrue，butyouthhasitsfeelings，andIdonotlikethis……

Saturday：KeepingtheSabbath。

Sunday：Papahasyieldedtheadvanceandeverybodyishardatwork。

Theshipyardissocrowdedthatthemenhindereachother；everybodyhurryingorbeinghurried；therushandconfusionandshoutingandwranglingareastonishingtoourfamily，whohavealwaysbeenusedtoaquiet，countrylife。

ItwasfromthisgermthatinalaterdaygrewthediariesofAdamandEve，thoughnothingverysatisfactoryevercameofthispreliminaryattempt。Theauthorhadfaithinit，however。ToBlisshewrote：

ImeantotakeplentyoftimeandpainswiththeNoah’sArkbook；

maybeitwillbeseveralyearsbeforeitisallwritten，butitwillbeaperfectlightningstrikerwhenitisdone。

Youcanhavethefirstsay(thatisplainenough)onthatoranyotherbookImayprepareforthepress，aslongasyoudealinafair，open，andhonorablewaywithme。Idonotthinkyouwilleverfindmedoingotherwisewithyou。Icangetabookreadyforyouanytimeyouwantit；butyoucan’twantonebeforethistimenextyear，soIhaveplentyoftime。

Blisswasonlytemporarilyappeased。Herealizedthattogetabookreadybythetimehewantedit—abookofsufficientsizeandimportancetomaintainthepacesetbytheInnocentsmeantrathermoreimmediateactionthanhisauthorseemedtocontemplate。Futhermore，heknewthatotherpublisherswerebesiegingtheauthoroftheInnocents；adisquietingthought。InearlyJuly，whenMr。Langdon’sconditionhadtemporarilyimproved，BlisshadcometoElmiraandproposedabookwhichshouldrelatetheauthor’stravelsandexperiencesintheFarWest。Itwasaninvitingsubject，andClemens，bythistimemoreattractedbytheideaofauthorshipanditsrewards，readilyenoughagreedtoundertakethevolume。Hehadbeenofferedhalfprofits，andsuggestedthatthenewcontractbearrangedupontheseterms。Bliss，figuringonasaleof100，000copies，proposedsevenandone—halfpercent。royaltyasanequivalent，andthecontractwassoarranged。Inafter—years，whenthecostofmanufactureandpaperhadbecomegreatlyreduced，Clemens，withbutaconfusednotionofbusinessdetails，believedhehadbeenmisledbyBlissinthiscontract，andwasbitterandresentfulaccordingly。Thefiguresremain，however，toshowthatBlissdealtfairly。Sevenandone—

halfpercent。ofasubscriptionbookdidrepresenthalfprofitsupto100，000copieswhenthecontractwasdrawn；butitrequiredtenyearstosellthatquantity，andinthattimeconditionshadchanged。Blisscouldhardlyforeseethatthesethingswouldbeso，andashewasdeadwhenthebooktouchedthe100，000markhecouldnotexplainorreadjustmatters，whatevermighthavebeenhisinclination。

Clemenswaspleasedenoughwiththecontractwhenitwasmade。ToOrionhewroteJuly15(1870)：

PercontractImusthaveanothersix—hundred—pagebookreadyformypublisherJanuary1st，andIonlybeganitto—day。Thesubjectofitisasecret，becauseImaypossiblychangeit。ButasitstandsIproposetodoupNevadaandCalifornia，beginningwiththetripacrossthecountryinthestage。Haveyouamemorandumoftheroutewetook，orthenamesofanyofthestationswestoppedat？Doyourememberanyofthescenes，names，incidents，oradventuresofthecoachtrip？——forIremembernexttonothingaboutthematter。Jotdownafoolscappageofitemsforme。IwishIcouldhavetwodays’

talkwithyou。

IsupposeIamtogetthebiggestcopyrightthistimeeverpaidonasubscriptionbookinthiscountry。

Theworksopromptlybegunmadelittleprogress。Harddaysofillnessandsorrowfollowed，anditwasnotuntilSeptemberthatitwasreallyunderway。Hisnaturalenthusiasmoveranynewundertakingpossessedhim。Onthe4thhewroteBliss：

DuringthepastweekIhavewrittenthefirstfourchaptersofthebook，andItellyou’TheInnocentsAbroad’willhavetogetupearlytobeatit。Itwillbeabookthatwilljumpstraightintocontinentalcelebritythefirstmonthitisissued。

Heprophesiedasaleof90，000copiesduringthefirsttwelvemonthsanddeclared，"Iseethecapabilitiesofthesubject。"

Butfurtherdisasters，eventhenimpending，madecontinuedeffortimpossible；theprospectofthenewbookforatimebecamegloomy，theideaofitlessinspiring。Otherplanspresentedthemselves，andatonetimehethoughtoflettingtheGalaxypublishersgetoutavolumeofhissketches。InOctoberhewroteBlissthathewas"drivelingalongtolerablyfaironthebook，gettingofffromtwelvetotwentypagesofmanuscriptaday。"BlissnaturallydiscouragedtheGalaxyidea，andrealizingthatthenewbookmightbelongdelayed，agreedtogetoutavolumeofmiscellanysufficientlylargeandimportantforsubscriptionsales。Hewasdoubtfulofthewisdomofthisplan，andwhenClemenssuddenlyproposedabrand—newschemehispublisherveryreadilyagreedtoholdbackthepublicationofSketchesindefinitely。

ThenewbookwastobeadventuresinthediamondminesofSouthAfrica，thennewlyopenedandofwidepublicinterest。Clemensdidnotproposetovisitthemineshimself，buttoletanothermandothetraveling，makethenotes，andwriteortellhimthestory，afterwhichClemenswouldenlargeandelaborateitinhisownfashion。HisadaptationofthelettersofProfessorFord，ayearearlier，hadconvincedhimthathisplanwouldworkoutsuccessfullyonalargerscale；hefixeduponhisoldfriend，J。H。Riley，ofWashington——[Riley—NewspaperCorrespondent。"

SeeSketches。]——(earlierofSanFrancisco)，astheproperpersontodothetraveling。AttheendofNovemberhewroteBliss：

IhaveputmygreedyhandsuponthebestmaninAmericaformypurpose，andshallstarthimtothediamondfieldinSouthAfricawithinafortnightatmyexpense……thatthebookwillhaveaperfectlybeautifulsale。

HesuggestedthatBlissadvanceRiley’sexpensemoney，theamounttobedeductedfromthefirstroyaltyreturns；alsoheproposedanincreasedroyalty，probablyinviewofthestartlingsplendorofthenewidea。

Blisswasdulyimpressed，andtheagreementwasfinallymadeonabasisofeightandone—halfpercent。，withanadvanceofroyaltysufficienttoseeRileytoSouthAfricaandreturn。

ClemenshadnotyetheardfromRileydefinitelywhenhewrotehisglowinglettertoBliss。HetookitforgrantedthatRiley，alwaysanadventuroussort，wouldgo。WhenRileywrotehimthathefeltmorallyboundtotheAlta，ofwhichhewasthenWashingtoncorrespondent，alsoincertainotherdirectionstilltheendofthesession，Clemenswrotehimatgreatlength，detailinghisschemeinfullandurginghimtowriteinstantlytotheAltaandothers，askingareleaseonthegroundofbeingofferedarareopportunitytoimprovehisfortunes。

YouknowrightwellthatIwouldnothaveyoudepartahairfromanyobligationforanymoney。The，boundlessconfidencethatIhaveinyouisbornofaconvictionofyourintegrityinsmallaswellasingreatthings。IknowplentyofmenwhoseintegrityIwouldtrusttohere，butnotoffyonderinAfrica。

Hisproposal，inbrief，toRileywasthatthelattershouldmakethetriptoAfricawithoutexpensetohimself，collectmemoranda，andsuchdiamondminesasmightbefoundlyingabouthandy。UponhisreturnhewastotakeuptemporaryresidenceintheClemenshouseholduntilthebookwasfinished，afterwhichlargebenefitsweretoaccruetoeverybodyconcerned。IntheendRileyobtainedareleasefromhisobligationsandwasoffforthediamondminesandfortune。

Poorfellow！Hewasfaithfulinhismission，anditissaidthathereallylocatedaminingclaimthatwouldhavemadehimandhisindependentforalltimetocome；butreturninghomewithhispreciousmemorandaandthenewsofgoodfortune，heaccidentallywoundedhimselfwithaforkwhileeating；blood—poisoningsetin(theycalleditcancerthen)，andhewasonlyabletogethometodie。Hismemorandawereneverused，hisminingclaimwasneveridentified。Certainly，deathwascloselyassociatedwithMarkTwain’sfortunesduringthoseearlierdaysofhismarriedlife。

OnthewholetheBuffaloresidencewasmainlyagloomyone；itsventureswereattendedbyill—fortune。ForsomereasonMarkTwain’sconnectionwiththeExpress，whileithadgiventhepaperawidereputation，hadnotlargelyincreaseditssubscription。Perhapshisworkonitwastoovariedanderratic。Nasby，whohadpopularizedtheToledoBlade，keptsteadilytooneline。Hisfarmerpublicknewalwaysjustwhattoexpectwhentheirweeklyeditionarrived。

Clemensandhiswifedreamedofanewhabitation，andnewfacesandsurroundings。TheyagreedtooffertheirhomeandhisinterestsintheExpressforsale。TheybegantotalkofHartford，whereTwichelllived，andwhereOrionClemensandhiswifehadrecentlylocated。

MarkTwain’snewfortuneshadwroughtchangesintheaffairsofhisrelatives。Already，beforehismarriage，hehadprospectedtownshereandtherewithaviewtofindinganEasternresidenceforhismotherandsister，andhehadkeptOrion’swelfarealwaysinmind。WhenPamelaandherdaughtercametohisweddinghetoldthemofalittlecitybythenameofFredonia(NewYork)，notfarfromBuffalo，wherehethoughttheymightfindapleasanthome。

"Iwentintherebynightandoutbynight，"hesaid，"soIsawnoneofit，butIhadanintelligent，attractiveaudience。ProspectFredoniaandletmeknowwhatitislike。Trytoselectaplacewhereagoodmanyfuneralspass。Malikesfunerals。Ifyoucanpickagoodfuneralcornershewillbehappy。"

ItwasinherlaterlifethatJaneClemenshaddevelopedthisparticularpassion。Shewouldconsultthemorningpaperforanynoticeofobsequiesandattendthosethatwereeasyofaccess。Watchingtheprocessionsgobygaveherapeculiarjoy。Mrs。MoffettandherdaughterdidgotoFredoniaimmediatelyfollowingthewedding。Theyfounditresidentiallyattractive，andrentedahousebeforereturningtoSt。Louis，apromptnessthatsomewhatalarmedtheoldlady，whodidnotaltogetherfancytheideaofbeingsuddenlysetdowninastrangehouse，inastrangeland，eventhoughitwouldbewithinhailingdistanceofSamandhisnewwife。PerhapstheFredoniafuneralsweresufficientlynumerousandattractive，forshesoonbecameattachedtotheplace，andenteredintothespiritofthelifethere，joiningitstemperancecrusades，andthelike，withzestandenjoyment。

OnionremainedinSt。Louis，butwhenBlissestablishedapapercalledThePublisher，andwantedaneditor，hewaschosenfortheplace，originallyofferedtohisbrother；thelatter，writingtoOnion，said：

Ifyoutaketheplacewithanairofperfectconfidenceinyourself，neveroncelettinganythingshowinyourbearingbutaquiet，modest，entire，andperfectconfidenceinyourabilitytodoprettymuchanythingintheworld，Blisswillthinkyouaretheverymanheneeds；butdon’tshowanyshadowoftimidityorunsoldierlydiffidence，forthatsortofthingisfataltoadvancement。

Iwarnyouthusbecauseyouarenaturallygiventoknockingyourpotoverinthisway，whenalittlejudiciousconductwouldmakeitboil。

LXXXI

SOMEFURTHERLITERARYMATTERS

MeantimeTheInnocentsAbroadhadcontinuedtoprosper。Itsauthorrankedmainlyasahumorist，butofsuchcolossalproportionsthathiscontemporarieshadseemedtodwindle；themightynoteofthe"FrogofCalaveras"haddwarfedascoreofsmallerpeepers。Attheendofayearfromitsdateofpublicationthebookhadsoldupto67，000andwascontinuingattherateofseveralthousandmonthly。

"Youarerunningitinstaving，tiptop，first—classstyle，"ClemenswrotetoBliss。"OntheaveragetenpeopleadaycomeandhuntmeuptotellmeIamabenefactor！Iguessthatisapartoftheprogramwedidn’texpect，inthefirstplace。"

Apparentlythebookappealedtoreadersofeverygrade。OnehundredandfifteencopieswereinconstantcirculationattheMercantileLibrary，inNewYork，whileinthemostremotecabinsofAmericaitwasreadandquoted。JackVanNostrand，makingalonghorsebacktourofColorado，wrote：

Istoppedaweekagoinaranchbutahundredmilesfromnowhere。Theoccupanthadjusttwobooks：theBibleandTheInnocentsAbroad——theformeringoodrepair。

Acrosstheoceanthebookhadfoundnolessfavor，andwasbeingtranslatedintomanyandstrangetongues。Bywhatseemsnowsomeveritablemagicitsauthor’sfamehadbecomeliterallyuniversal。TheconsulatHongkong，discussingEnglishliteraturewithaChineseacquaintance，amandarin，mentionedThePilgrim’sProgress。

"Yes，indeed，Ihavereadit！"themandarinsaid，eagerly。"WeareenjoyingitinChina，andshallhaveitsooninourownlanguage。ItisbyMarkTwain。"

InEnglandthebookhadanamazingvoguefromthebeginning，andEnglishreaderswereendeavoringtooutdotheAmericansinappreciation。Indeed，asarule，Englishreadersofculture，criticalreaders，rosetoanunderstandingofMarkTwain’sliteraryvaluewithgreaterpromptnessthandidthesameclassofreadersathome。Therewereexceptions，ofcourse。

TherewereEnglishcriticswhodidnottakeMarkTwainseriously，therewereAmericancriticswhodid。AmongthelatterwasacertainWilliamWard，aneditorofapaperdowninMacon，Georgia——TheBeacon。Warddidnotholdaplacewiththegreatmagazinearbitersofliteraryrank。Hewasonlyanobscurecountryeditor，buthewrotelikeaprophet。Hisarticle——toolongtoquoteinfull——concernedAmericanhumoristsingeneral，fromWashingtonIrving，throughJohnPhoenix，PhilanderDoesticks，SutLovingwood，ArtemusWard，JoshBillingsandPetroleumV。

Nasby，downtoMarkTwain。Withtheexceptionofthefirstandlastnamedhesaysofthem：

Theyhaveallhad，orwillhave，theirday。Someofthemarerestingbeneaththesod，andothersstilllivewhoseworkwillscarcelysurvivethem。SinceIrvingnohumoristinprosehasheldthefoundationofapermanentfameexceptitbeMarkTwain，andthis，asinthecaseofIrving，isbecauseheisapurewriter。

Asidefromanysubtlemirththatlurksthroughhiscomposition，thegraceandfinishofhismoredidacticanddescriptivesentencesindicatemorethanmediocrity。

ThewriterthenreferstoMarkTwain’sdescriptionoftheSphinx，comparingitwithBulwer’s，whichhethinksmayhaveinfluencedit。Hewasmistakeninthis，forClemenshadnotreadBulwer——nevercouldreadhimatanylength。

OftheEnglishopinions，thatofTheSaturdayReviewwasperhapsmostdoubtful。Itcamealonglatein1870，andwouldhardlybeworthrecallingifitwerenotforaresulting，orcollateral，interest。

Clemenssawnoticeofthisreviewbeforehesawthereviewitself。A

paragraphintheBostonAdvertiserspokeofTheSaturdayReviewastreatingtheabsurditiesoftheInnocentsfromaseriousstandpoint。Theparagraphclosed：

Wecanimaginethedelightofthehumoristinreadingthistributetohispower；andindeeditissoamusinginitselfthathecanhardlydobetterthanreproducethearticleinfullinhisnextmonthly"Memoranda。"

TheoldtemptationtohoaxhisreaderspromptedMarkTwainto"reproduce"

intheGalaxy，nottheReviewarticle，whichhehadnotyetseen，butanimaginaryReviewarticle，anarticleinwhichtheimaginaryreviewerwouldbeutterlydevoidofanysenseofhumorandtreatthemostabsurdincidentsofTheNewPilgrim’sProgressasifsetdownbytheauthorinsolemnandseriousearnest。Thepretendedreviewbegan：

LordMacaulaydiedtoosoon。Weneverfeltthissodeeplyaswhenwefinishedthelastchapteroftheabove—namedextravagantwork。

Macaulaydiedtoosoon；fornonebuthecouldmeteoutcompleteandcomprehensivejusticetotheinsolence，theimpudence，thepresumption，themendacity，and，aboveall，themajesticignoranceofthisauthor。

Thereviewgoesontocitecasesoftheauthor’sgrossdeception。Itsays：

LetthecultivatedEnglishstudentofhumannaturepicturetohimselfthisMarkTwainasapersoncapableofdoingthefollowingdescribedthings；andnotonlydoingthem，but，withincredibleinnocence，printingthemtranquillyandcalmlyinabook。Forinstance：

Hestatesthatheenteredahair—dresser’sinParistogetashave，andthefirst"rake"thebarbergavehimwithhisrazoritloosenedhis"hide，"andliftedhimoutofthechair。

Thisisunquestionablyextravagant。InFlorencehewassoannoyedbybeggarsthathepretendstohaveseizedandeatenoneinafranticspiritofrevenge。Thereis，ofcourse，notruthinthis。

Hegivesatfulllengththetheatricalprogram，seventeenoreighteenhundredyearsold，whichheprofessestohavefoundintheruinsoftheColosseum，amongthedirt—andmoldandrubbish。Itisasufficientcommentuponthissubjecttoremarkthatevenacast—

ironprogramwouldnothavelastedsolongunderthecircumstances。

Thereweretwoandone—halfpagesofthisreallydelightfulburlesquewhichtheauthorhadwrittenwithhuge—enjoyment，partlyasajokeontheReview，partlytotrickAmericaneditors，whohebelievedwouldacceptitasafreshandstartlingproofofthetraditionalEnglishlackofhumor。

But，asintheearlysage—brushhoaxes，heratheroverdidthething。

Readersandeditorsreadilyenoughaccepteditasgenuine，sofarashavingcomefromTheSaturdayReview；butmostofthem，regardeditasadeliciousbitofhumorwhichMarkTwainhimselfhadtakenseriously，andwasthereforetheonesold。Thiswascertainlystartling，andbynomeansgratifying。Inthenextissueheundertookthatsaddestofallperformanceswithtongueorpen：heexplainedhisjoke，andinsistedonthetruthoftheexplanation。Thenhesaid：

IfanymandoubtsmywordnowIwillkillhim。No，Iwillnotkillhim；Iwillwinhismoney。Iwillbethimtwentytoone，andletanyNewYorkpublisherholdthestakes，thatthestatementsIhaveabovemadeastotheauthorshipofthearticleinquestionareentirelytrue。

ButtheCincinnatiEnquirerpersistedincontinuingthejoke——in"rubbingitin，"aswesaynow。TheEnquirerdeclaredthatMarkTwainhadbeenintenselymortifiedathavingbeensobadlytakenin；thathisexplanationintheGalaxywas"ingenious，butunfortunatelynottrue。"

TheEnquirermaintainedthatTheSaturdayReviewofOctober8，1870，didcontainthearticleexactlyasprintedinthe"Memoranda，"andadvisedMarkTwaintoadmitthathewassold，andsaynomoreaboutit。

Thiswasenraging。MarkTwainhadhisownideasastohowfarajokemightbecarriedwithoutviolence，andthiswasagoodwaybeyondthelimits。HedenouncedtheEnquirer’sstatementasa"pitiful，deliberatefalsehood，"inhisangerfallingintotheold—timephrasingofnewspapereditorialabuse。Heofferedtobetthemathousanddollarsincashthattheycouldnotprovetheirassertions，andaskedpointedly，inconclusion："Willtheyswallowthatfalsehoodignominiously，orwilltheysendanagenttotheGalaxyoffice？IthinktheCincinnatiEnquirermustbeeditedbychildren。"Hepromisedthatiftheydidnotaccepthisfinancialpropositionhewouldexposetheminthenextissue。

Theincidentclosedthere。Hewasprevented，byillnessinhishousehold，fromcontributingtothenextissue，andthesecondissuefollowingwashisfinal"Memoranda"installment。Sothematterperishedandwasforgotten。Itwashislasteditorialhoax。Perhapsheconcludedthathoaxesinanyformweredangerousplaythings；theyweretoolikelytogooffatthewrongend。

ItwaswiththeAprilnumber(1871)thatheconcludedhisrelationswiththeGalaxy。Inabriefvaledictoryhegavehisreasons：

IhavenowwrittenfortheGalaxyayear。Forthelasteightmonths，withhardlyaninterval，Ihavehadformyfellowsandcomrades，nightandday，doctorsandwatchersofthesick！Duringtheseeightmonthsdeathhastakentwomembersofmyhomecircleandmalignantlythreatenedtwoothers。AllthisIhaveexperienced，yetallthetimehavebeenundercontracttofurnish"humorous"matter，onceamonth，forthismagazine。Iamspeakingtheexacttruthintheabovedetails。Pleasetoputyourselfinmyplaceandcontemplatethegrislygrotesquenessofthesituation。Ithinkthatsomeofthe"humor"Ihavewrittenduringthisperiodcouldhavebeeninjectedintoafuneralsermonwithoutdisturbingthesolemnityoftheoccasion。

The"Memoranda"willceasepermanentlywiththisissueofthemagazine。Tobeapirateonalowsalary，andwithnoshareintheprofitsofthebusiness，usedtobemyideaofanuncomfortableoccupation，butIhaveotherviewsnow。Tobeamonthlyhumoristinacheerlesstimeisdrearier。

Withoutdoubthefeltagladreliefinbeingridofthisrecurrent，imperativedemand。HewrotetoOrionthathehadtoldtheGalaxypeoplehewouldnotwriteanotherarticle，longorshort，forlessthan$500，andpreferrednottodoitatall。

TheGalaxydepartmentandtheworkontheExpresswereMarkTwain’sfarewelltojournalism；forthe"Memoranda"wasessentiallyjournalistic，almostasmuchso，andasliberally，ashisold—timeEnterpriseposition。

Apparentlyhewrotewithabsolutefreedom，unhamperedbyeditorialpolicyorrestriction。Theresultwasnotalwayspleasant，anditwasnotalwaysrefined。WemaybecertainthatitwasbecauseofMrs。Clemens’sheavyburdensthatyear，andherconsequentinabilitytoexertabeneficentcensorship，thatmorethanone——morethanadozen——ofthe"Memoranda"contributionswerepermittedtoseethelightofprint。

Asawhole，theliteraryresultofMarkTwain’sBuffaloperioddoesnotreachthehighstandardofTheInnocentsAbroad。Itwasaretrogression——insomemeasureareturntohisearlierform。Ithadbeendoneunderpressure，underheavystressofmind，ashesaid。Alsotherewasanotherreason；neitherthesubjecttreatednortheenvironmentoflaborhadaffordedthatloftyinspirationwhichglorifiedeverystepoftheQuakerCityjourney。Buffalowasaprogressivecity——abeautifulcity，asAmericancitiesgo——butitwashardlyaninspiringcityforliterature，andadull，dingynewspaperofficewasfar，veryfar，fromthepleasantdecksoftheQuakerCity，thecamp—firesofSyria，theblueskyandseaoftheMedit&ranean。

LXXXII

THEWRITINGOF"ROUGHINGIT"

ThethirdbookpublishedbyMarkTwainwasnottheWesternbookhewaspreparingforBliss。Itwasasmallvolume，issuedbySheldon&Co。，entitledMarkTwain’sAutobiography(Burlesque)andFirstRomance。TheRomancewasthe"Awful，TerribleMedievalRomance"whichhadappearedintheExpressatthebeginningof1870。Theburlesqueautobiographyhadnotpreviouslyappeared。Thetwomadeathinlittlebook，which，inadditiontoitsliteraryfeatures，hadrunningthroughitaseriesoffull—page，irrelevantpictures———cartoonsoftheErieRailroadRing，presentedasillustrationsofaslightlymodifiedversionof"TheHouseThatJackBuilt。"The"House"wastheErieheadquarters，thepurposebeingtoillustratetheswindlingmethodsoftheRing。ThefacesofJayGould，JamesFisk，Jr。，JohnT。Hoffman，andothersofthecombination，arechieflyconspicuous。Thepublicationwasnotimportant，fromanystandpoint。Literaryburlesqueisrarelyimportant，anditwasfarfromMarkTwain’sbestformofexpression。Ayearortwolaterherealizedthemistakeofthisbook，boughtintheplatesanddestroyedthem。

MeantimethenewWesternbookwasatastandstill。ToOrion，inMarch，hewrote：

IamstillnursingLivynightandday。Iamnearlywornout。WeshallgotoElmiratendayshence(ifLivycantravelonamattressthen)，andstaythereuntilIfinishtheCaliforniabook，saythreemonths。ButIcan’tbeginworkrightawaywhenIgetthere；musthaveaweek’srest，forIhavebeenthroughthirtydays’terrificsiege。

Hepromisedtoforwardsomeofthemanuscriptsoon。

HoldonfourorfivedaysandIwillseeifIcangetafewchaptersfixedtosendtoBliss……

IhaveofferedthishouseandtheExpressforsale，andwhenwegotoElmiraweleavehereforgood。Ishallnotselectanewhometillthebookisfinished，butwehavelittledoubtthatHartfordwillbetheplace。

HedisposedofhisinterestintheExpressinApril，atasacrificeof$10，000onthepurchaseprice。Mrs。Clemensandthebabywereabletotravel，andwithoutfurtherdelayhetookthemtoElmira，toQuarryFarm。

QuarryFarm，thehomeofMrs。Clemens’ssister，Mrs。TheodoreCrane，isabeautifulhilltop，withawidegreenslope，overlookingthehazycityandtheChemungRiver，beyondwhicharethedistanthills。ItwasboughtquiteincidentallybyMr。andMrs。Langdon，who，drivingbyoneevening，stoppedtowaterthehorsesanddecidedthatitwouldmakeahappysummerretreat，wherethefamiliescouldcombinetheirhousekeepingarrangementsduringvacationdays。Whentheplacehadfirstbeenpurchased，theyhaddebatedonanameforit。Theyhadtriedseveral，amongthem"Go—as—you—

pleaseHall，""Crane’sNest，"andhadfinallyagreedupon"RestandBeThankful。"Butthiswasonlyitsofficialname。Therewasanabandonedquarryupthehill，alittlewayfromthehouse，andthetitlesuggestedbyThomasK。Beechercamemorenaturallytothetongue。TheplacebecameQuarryFarm，andsoremains。

ClemensandhiswifehadfullymadeuptheirmindstoliveinHartford。

Theyhadbothconceivedanaffectionfortheplace，ClemensmainlybecauseofTwichell，whilebothofthemyearnedforthecongenialliteraryandsocialatmosphere，andthewelcomewhichtheyfeltawaitedthem。HartfordwaspreciselywhatBuffalointhatdaywasnot——ahomefortheliteraryman。Itheldadistinguishedgroupofwriters，mostofwhomtheClemensesalreadyknew。Furthermore，withBlissaspublisheroftheMarkTwainbooks，itheldtheirchiefbusinessinterests。

Theirplansforgoingwerenotverydefiniteastotime。Clemensfoundthathisworkwentbetteratthefarm，andthatMrs。Clemensandthedelicatebabydailyimproved。TheydecidedtoremainatQuarryFarmforthesummer，theirfirstsummerinthatbeautifulplacewhichwouldmeansomuchtothemintheyearstocome。

ItwasreallyJoeGoodman，asmuchasanything，thatstirredafreshenthusiasminthenewbook。Goodmanarrivedjustwhentheauthor’sspiritswereatlowebb。

"Joe，"hesaid，"IguessI’mdonefor。Idon’tappeartobeabletogetalongatallwithmywork，andwhatIdowritedoesnotseemvaluable。

I’mafraidI’llneverbeabletoreachthestandardof’TheInnocentsAbroad’again。HereiswhatIhavewritten，Joe。Readit，andseeifthatisyouropinion。"

Goodmantookthemanuscriptandseatedhimselfinachair，whileClemenswentovertoatableandpretendedtowork。Goodmanreadpageafterpage，critically，andwaspresentlyabsorbedinit。Clemenswatchedhimfurtively，tillhecouldstanditnolonger。Thenhethrewdownhispen，exclaiming：

"Iknewit！Iknewit！Iamwritingnothingbutrot。Youhavesatthereallthistimereadingwithoutasmile，andpityingtheassIammakingofmyself。ButIamnotwhollytoblame。Iamnotstrongenoughtofightagainstfate。Ihavebeentryingtowriteafunnybook，withdeadpeopleandsicknessaverywhere。Mr。Langdondiedfirst，thenayoungladyinourhouse，andnowMrs。Clemensandthebabyhavebeenatthepointofdeathallwinter！Oh，Joe，IwishtoGodIcoulddiemyself！"

"Mark，"saidJoe，"Iwasreadingcritically，notforamusement，andsofarasIhaveread，andcanjudge，thisisoneofthebestthingsyouhaveeverwritten。Ihavefounditperfectlyabsorbing。Youaredoingagreatbook！"

ClemensknewthatGoodmanneverspokeexceptfromconviction，andtheverdictwastohimlikeamessageoflifehandeddownbyanarchangel。

Hewasachangedmaninstantly。Hewasallenthusiasm，fullofhissubject，eagertogoon。HeproposedtopayGoodmanasalarytostaythereandkeephimcompanyandfurnishhimwithinspiration——thePacificcoastatmosphereandvernacular，whichhefearedhadslippedawayfromhim。Goodmandeclinedthesalary，butextendedhisvisitaslongashisplanswouldpermit，andthetwohadahappytimetogether，recallingoldComstockdays。Everymorning，foramonthormore，theyusedtotrampoverthefarm。Theyfellintothehabitofvisitingtheoldquarryandpawingoverthefragmentsinsearchoffossilspecimens。Bothofthemhadapoeticinterestingeology，itsinfiniteremotenessesanditstestimonies。Withoutscientificknowledge，theytookadeeppleasureinaccumulatingacollection，whichtheyarrangedonboardstornfromanoldfence，untiltheyhadenoughspecimenstofillasmallmuseum。Theyimaginedtheycoulddistinguishcertaingeologicalrelationsandfamilies，andwouldtalkabouttrilobites，theOldRedSandstoneperiod，andtheazoicage，orfollowrandomspeculationtofar—lyingconclusions，developingvaguehumorsofphraseandfancy，havingaltogetherajoyfulgoodtime。

AnotherinterestthatdevelopedduringGoodman’sstaywasinoneRuloff，whowasunderdeathsentenceforaparticularlyatrociousmurder。ThepaperswerefullofRuloff’sprodigiouslearning。Itwassaidthathehadinpreparationaworkshowingtheunityofalllanguages。GoodmanandClemensagreedthatRuloff’sdeathwouldbeagreatlosstomankind，eventhoughhewasclearlyavillainanddeservedhissentence。Theydecidedthatjusticewouldbeservedjustaswellifsomestupidpersonwerehunginhisplace，andfollowingoutthisfancyClemensonemorningputasidehisregularworkandwroteanarticletotheTribune，offeringtosupplyasubstituteforRuloff。Hesigneditsimply"SamuelLanghorne，"anditwaspublishedasaseriouscommunication，withoutcomment，sofarastheTribunewasconcerned。Otherpapers，however，tookitupanditwaswidelycopiedandcommentedupon。Apparentlynooneeveridentified，MarkTwainwiththeauthorshipoftheletter，which，bytheway，doesnotappeartohaveprolongedRuloff’searthlyusefulness。——[ThereaderwillfindtheRuloffletterinfullunderAppendixK，attheendoflastvolume。]

Lifeatthefarmmayhavefurnishedagriculturalinspiration，forClemenswrotesomethingaboutHoraceGreeley’sfarming，alsoaskitconcerningHenryWardBeecher’seffortsinthatdirection。OfMr。Beecher’sfarminghesaid：

"Hisstrawberrieswouldbeacomfortablesuccessifrobinswouldeatturnips。"

ThearticleamusedBeecher，andperhapsGreeleywasamusedtoo，forhewrote：

MARK，——Youaremistakenastomycriticismsonyourfarming。I

neverpubliclymadeany，whileyouhaveundertakentotelltheexactcostperpintofmypotatoesandcabbages，trulyenoughtheinspirationofgenius。Ifyouwillreallybetakeyourselftofarming，oreventotellingwhatyouknowaboutit，ratherthanwhatyoudon’tknowaboutmine，Iwillnotonlyrefrainfromdisparagingcriticism，butwillgiveyoumyblessing。

Yours，HORACEGREELEY。

TheletterisinMr。Greeley’scharacteristicscrawl，andnodoubtfurnishedinspirationfortheturnipstoryin’RoughingIt’，alsothemodelforthepretendedfacsimileofGreeley’swriting。

Altogetherthatwasabusy，enterprisingsummeratQuarryFarm。BythemiddleofMay，ClemenswrotetoBlissthathehadtwelvehundredmanuscriptpagesofthenewbookalreadywritten，andthathewasturningouttheremainderattherateoffromthirtytosixty—fiveperday。Hewasinhighspiritsbythistime。Thefamilyhealthhadimproved，andprospectswerebright。

Ihaveenoughmanuscriptonhandnowtomake(allowingforengravings)

aboutfourhundredpagesofthebook，consequentlyamtwo—thirdsdone。

IintendedtorunuptoHartfordaboutthemiddleoftheweekandtakeitalong，butIfindmyselfsothoroughlyinterestedinmyworknow(athingIhavenotexperiencedformonths)thatIcan’tbeartoloseasinglemomentoftheinspiration。SoIwillstayhereandpegawayaslongasitlasts。MypresentideaistowriteasmuchmoreasIhavealreadywritten，andthencollectfromthemasstheverybestchaptersanddiscardtherest。WhenIgetitdoneIwanttoseethemanwhowillbegintoreaditandnotfinishit。Nothinggrievesmenow；nothingtroublesme，nothingbothersmeorgetsmyattention。Idon’tthinkofanythingbutthebook，anddon’thaveanhour’sunhappinessaboutanything，anddon’tcaretwocentswhetherschoolkeepsornot。Thebookwillbedonesoonnow。Itwillbeastarchybook；thededicationwillbeworththepriceofthevolume。Thus：

TOTHELATECAIN

THISBOOKISDEDICATED

notonaccountofrespectforhismemory，foritmeritslittlerespect；notonaccountofsympathyforhim，forhisbloodydeedplaceshimwithoutthepaleofsympathy，strictlyspeaking，butoutofamerehumanecommiserationforhim，inthatitwashismisfortunetoliveinadarkagethatknewnotthebeneficentinsanityplea。