第88章

’Atlastmyfriendsaidtome，“Itisnowtimethoushouldestreturntothymotherandthybrother。“SoIarose，anddepartedtomymotherandmybrother；andatmydeparturemyoldfriendgavemehisblessing，andhiswifeandtheyoungpersonshedtears，thelastespecially。Andwhenmymothersawme，sheshedtears，andfellonmyneckandkissedme，andmybrothertookmebythehandandbademewelcome；andwhenourfirstemotionsweresubsided，mymothersaid，“Itrustthouartcomeinaluckyhour。Afewweeksagomycousin(whosefavouritethoualwayswast)diedandlefttheehisheir-lefttheethegoodlyfarminwhichhelived。Itrust，myson，thatthouwiltnowsettle，andbeacomforttomeinmyolddays。“AndIanswered，“Iwill，ifsopleasetheLord“；andIsaidtomyself，“GodgrantthatthisbequestbeatokenoftheLord’sfavour。“

’AndinafewdaysIdepartedtotakepossessionofmyfarm；itwasabouttwentymilesfrommymother’shouse，inabeautifulbutratherwilddistrict；Iarrivedatthefalloftheleaf。AlldaylongIbusiedmyselfwithmyfarm，andthuskeptmymindemployed。

Atnight，however，Ifeltrathersolitary，andIfrequentlywishedforacompanion。EachnightandmorningIprayedferventlyuntotheLord；forHishandhadbeenveryheavyuponme，andIfearedHim。

’Therewasonethingconnectedwithmynewabodewhichgavemeconsiderableuneasiness-thewantofspiritualinstruction。Therewasachurch，indeed，closeathand，inwhichservicewasoccasionallyperformed，butinsohurriedandheartlessamannerthatIderivedlittlebenefitfromit。Theclergymantowhomthebeneficebelongedwasavaletudinarian，whopassedhistimeinLondon，oratsomewatering-place，entrustingthecareofhisflocktothecurateofadistantparish，whogavehimselfverylittletroubleaboutthematter。NowIwantedeverySundaytohearfromthepulpitwordsofconsolationandencouragement，similartothosewhichIhadheardutteredfromthepulpitbymygoodandvenerablefriend，butIwasdebarredfromthisprivilege。Atlength，onedaybeinginconversationwithoneofmylabourers，astaidandseriousman，Ispoketohimofthematterwhichlayheavyuponmymind；

whereupon，lookingmewistfullyintheface，hesaid，“Master，thewantofreligiousinstructioninmychurchwaswhatdrovemetotheMethodists。““TheMethodists，“saidI，“arethereanyintheseparts？““Thereisachapel，“saidhe，“onlyhalfamiledistant，atwhichtherearetwoserviceseverySunday，andothertwoduringtheweek。“NowithappenedthatmyvenerablefriendwasoftheMethodistpersuasion，andwhenIheardthepoormantalkinthismanner，Isaidtohim，“MayIgowithyounextSunday？““Whynot？“

saidhe；soIwentwiththelabourerontheensuingSabbathtothemeetingoftheMethodists。

’IlikedthepreachingwhichIheardatthechapelverywell，thoughitwasnotquitesocomfortableasthatofmyoldfriend，thepreacherbeinginsomerespectsadifferentkindofman。It，however，didmegood，andIwentagain，andcontinuedtodoso，thoughIdidnotbecomearegularmemberofthebodyatthattime。

’Ihadnowthebenefitofreligiousinstruction，andalsotoacertainextentofreligiousfellowship，forthepreacherandvariousmembersofhisflockfrequentlycametoseeme。Theywerehonestplainmen，notexactlyofthedescriptionwhichIwishedfor，butstillgoodsortofpeople，andIwasgladtoseethem。

Onceonatime，whensomeofthemwerewithme，oneoftheminquiredwhetherIwasferventinprayer。“Veryfervent，“saidI。

“AnddoyoureadtheScripturesoften？“saidhe。“No，“saidI。

“Whynot？“saidhe。“BecauseIamafraidtoseetheremyowncondemnation。“Theylookedateachother，andsaidnothingatthetime。Onleavingme，however，theyalladvisedmetoreadtheScriptureswithfervencyandprayer。

’AsIhadtoldthesehonestpeople，IshrankfromsearchingtheScriptures；theremembranceofthefatalpassagewasstilltoovividinmymindtopermitme。Ididnotwishtoseemycondemnationrepeated，butIwasveryferventinprayer，andalmosthopedthatGodwouldyetforgivemebyvirtueoftheblood-sheddingoftheLamb。Timepassedon，myaf