第15章

grewshame-facedaboutthematter，andfearedtoencounteralooking-glass。Butmotherwasveryproud，andsaidshenevercouldhavetoomuchofme。

Theworstofalltomakemeashamedofbearingmyheadsohigh——athingIsawnowaytohelp，forInevercouldhangmychindown，andmybackwaslikeagatepostwheneverItriedtobendit——theworstofallwasourlittleEliza，whonevercouldcometoasizeherself，thoughshehadthewinefromtheSacramentatEasterandAllhallowmas，onlytobesmallandskinny，sharp，andclevercrookedly。Notthatherbodywasoutofthestraight(beingtoosmallforthatperhaps)，butthatherwitwasfullofcorners，jagged，andstrange，anduncomfortable。Younevercouldtellwhatshemightsaynext；andIlikenotthatkindofwomen。NowGodforgivemefortalkingsoofmyownfather’sdaughter，andsomuchthemorebyreasonthatmyfathercouldnothelpit。Therightwayistofacethematter，andthenbesorryforeveryone。Mymotherfellgrievouslyonaslide，whichJohnFryhadmadenightheapple-roomdoor，andhiddenwithstrawfromthestable，tocoverhisowngreatidleness。MyfatherlaidJohn’snoseontheice，andkepthimwarminspiteofit；butitwastoolateforEliza。Shewasbornnextdaywithmoremindthanbody——theworstthingthatcanbefallaman。

ButAnnie，myothersister，wasnowafinefairgirl，beautifultobehold。Icouldlookatherbythefireside，foranhourtogether，whenIwasnottoosleepy，andthinkofmydearfather。Andshewoulddothesamethingbyme，onlywaitthebetweenoftheblazes。Herhairwasdoneupinaknotbehind，butsomewouldfalloverhershoulders；andthedancingofthelightwassweettoseethroughaman’seyelashes。

Thereneverwasafacethatshowedthelightortheshadowoffeeling，asiftheheartweresuntoit，morethanourdearAnnie’sdid。Tolookathercarefully，youmightthinkthatshewasnotdwellingonanything；

andthenshewouldknowyouwerelookingather，andthoseeyeswouldtellallaboutit。GodknowsthatI

trytobesimpleenough，tokeeptoHismeaninginme，andnotmaketheworstofHischildren。YetoftenhaveIbeenputtoshame，andreadytobitemytongueoff，afterspeakingamissofanybody，andlettingoutmylittleness，whensuddenlymineeyeshavemetthepuresoftgazeofAnnie。

AsfortheDoones，theywerethrivingstill，andnoonetocomeagainstthem；exceptindeedbywordofmouth，towhichtheylentnoheedwhatever。Complaintsweremadefromtimetotime，bothinhighandlowquarters(astherankmightbeofthepeoplerobbed)，andonceortwiceinthehighestofall，towit，theKinghimself。ButHisMajestymadeagoodjokeaboutit(notmeaninganyharm，Idoubt)，andwassomuchpleasedwithhimselfthereupon，thathequiteforgavethemischief。Moreover，themainauthoritieswerealongwayoff；andtheChancellorhadnocattleonExmoor；andasformylordtheChiefJustice，someroguehadtakenhissilverspoons；whereuponhislordshipsworethatneveranothermanwouldhehanguntilhehadthatonebytheneck。ThereforetheDooneswentonastheylisted，andnonesawfittomeddlewiththem。Fortheonlymanwhowouldhavedaredtocometoclosequarterswiththem，thatistosayTomFaggus，himselfwasaquarryforthelaw，ifeveritshouldbeunhooded。Moreover，hehadtransferredhisbusinesstotheneighbourhoodofWantage，inthecountyofBerks，wherehefoundtheclimatedrier，alsogooddownsandcommonsexcellentforgalloping，andricheryeomenthanoursbe，andbetterroadstorobthemon。

Somefolk，whohadwiserattendedtotheirownaffairs，saidthatI(beingsizeablenow，andabletoshootnotbadly)oughttodosomethingagainstthoseDoones，andshowwhatIwasmadeof。ButforatimeIwasverybashful，shakingwhencalleduponsuddenly，andblushingasdeepasamaiden；formystrengthwasnotcomeuponme，andmayhapIhadgrowninfrontofit。

Andagain，thoughIlovedmyfatherstill，andwouldfireatawordabouthim，Isawnothowitwoulddohimgoodformetoharmhisinjurers。Someracesareofrevengefulkind，andwillforyearspursuetheirwrong，andsacrificethisworldandthenextforamoment’sfoulsatisfaction，butmethinksthiscomesofsomeblackblood，pervertedandneverpurified。AndIdoubtbutmenoftrueEnglishbirtharestouterthansotobetwisted，thoughsomeofthewomenmaytakethatturn，iftheirownliferunsunkindly。

Letthatpass——Iamnevergoodattalkingofthingsbeyondme。AllIknowis，thatifIhadmettheDoonewhohadkilledmyfather，Iwouldgladlyhavethrashedhimblackandblue，supposingIwereable；butwouldneverhavefiredagunathim，unlesshebeganthatgamewithme，orfelluponmoreofmyfamily，orwereviolentamongwomen。Andtodothemjustice，mymotherandAnniewereequallykindandgentle，butElizawouldflameandgrowwhitewithcontempt，andnottrustherselftospeaktous。

Nowastrangethingcametopassthatwinter，whenI

wastwenty-oneyearsold，averystrangething，whichaffrightedtherest，andmademefeeluncomfortable。

Notthattherewasanythinginit，todoharmtoanyone，onlythatnonecouldexplainit，exceptbyattributingittothedevil。Theweatherwasverymildandopen，andscarcelyanysnowfell；atanyrate，nonelayontheground，evenforanhour，inthehighestpartofExmoor；athingwhichIknewnotbeforenorsince，aslongasIcanremember。Butthenightswerewonderfullydark，asthoughwithnostarsintheheaven；andalldaylongthemistswererollinguponthehillsanddownthem，asifthewholelandwereawash-house。Themoorlandwasfullofsnipesandteal，andcurlewsflyingandcrying，andlapwingsflappingheavily，andravenshoveringrounddeadsheep；yetnoredshanksnordottrell，andscarceanygoldenplovers(ofwhichwehavegreatstoregenerally)butvastlonelybirds，thatcriedatnight，andmovedthewholeairwiththeirpinions；yetnomaneversawthem。Itwasdismalaswellasdangerousnowforanymantogofowling(whichoflateIlovedmuchinthewinter)

becausethefogwouldcomedownsothickthatthepanofthegunwasreeking，andthefowloutofsighterethepowderkindled，andthenthesoundofthepiecewassodead，thattheshooterfearedharm，andglancedoverhisshoulder。Butthedangerofcoursewasfarlessinthisthaninlosingofthetrack，andfallingintothemires，oroverthebrimofaprecipice。

Nevertheless，Imustneedsgoout，beingyoungandverystupid，andfearedofbeingafraid；afearwhichawisemanhaslongcastby，havinglearnedofthemanifolddangerswhicheverandeverencompassus。Andbesidethisfollyandwildnessofyouth，perchancetherewassomething，Iknownotwhat，ofthejoywehaveinuncertainty。Mother，infearofmymissinghome——thoughforthatmatter，Icouldsmellsupper，whenhungry，throughahundredland-yardsoffog——mydearmother，whothoughtofmetentimesforonethoughtaboutherself，gaveorderstoringthegreatsheep-bell，whichhungabovethepigeon-cote，everytenminutesoftheday，andthesoundcamethroughtheplaitsoffog，andIwasvexedaboutit，likethelettersofacopy-book。Itremindedme，too，ofBlundell’sbell，andthegrieftogointoschoolagain。

Butduringthosetwomonthsoffog(forwehaditallthewinter)，thesaddestandtheheaviestthingwastostandbesidethesea。Tobeuponthebeachyourself，andseethelongwavescomingin；toknowthattheyarelongwaves，butonlyseeapieceofthem；andtohearthemliftingroundly，swellingoversmoothgreenrocks，plashingdowninthehollowcorners，butbearingonallthesameasever，softandsleekandsorrowful，tilltheirlittlenoiseisover。

OneoldmanwholivedatLynmouth，seekingtobeburiedthere，havingbeenmorethanhalfovertheworld，thoughshytospeakaboutit，andfaintocomehometohisbirthplace，thisoldWillWatcombe(whodweltbythewater)saidthatourstrangewinterarosefromathinghecalledthe’Gulf-stream’，rushingupChannelsuddenly。Hesaiditwashotwater，almostfitforamantoshavewith，anditthrewallourcoldwaterout，andruinedthefishandthespawning-time，andacoldspringwouldcomeafterit。IwasfondofgoingtoLynmouthonSundaytohearthisoldmantalk，forsometimeshewoulddiscoursewithme，whennobodyelsecouldmovehim。Hetoldmethatthispowerfulfloodsetinuponourwestsohardsometimesonceintenyears，andsometimesnotforfifty，andtheLordonlyknewthesenseofit；butthatwhenitcame，therewithcamewarmthandclouds，andfog，andmoisture，andnuts，andfruit，andevenshells；andallthetideswerethrownabroad。Asfornutshewinkedawhile，andchewedapieceoftobacco；yetdidInotcomprehendhim。OnlyafterwardsIheardthatnutswithliquidkernelscame，travellingontheGulfstream；forneverbeforewasknownsomuchforeigncordiallandeduponourcoast，floatingashorebymistakeinthefog，and(whatwiththetossingandthemist)toomuchastraytolearnitsduty。

Folk，whoareevertoopronetotalk，saidthatWillWatcombehimselfknewbetterthananybodyelseaboutthisdriftoftheGulf-stream，andtheplaceswhereitwouldcomeashore，andthecavesthattookthein-draught。ButDeWhichehalse，ourgreatmagistrate，certifiedthattherewasnoproofofunlawfulimportation；neithergoodcausetosuspectit，atatimeofChristiancharity。AndweknewthatitwasafoulthingforsomequarrymentosaythatnightafternighttheyhadbeendigginganewcellaratLeyManortoholdthelittlemarksofrespectfoundinthecavernsathigh-waterweed。Letthatbe，itisnoneofmybusinesstospeakevilofdignities；dulywecommonpeoplejokedofthe’Gulp-stream，’aswecalledit。

Butthethingwhichastonishedandfrightenedusso，wasnot，Idoassureyou，thelandingofforeignspirits，northeloomofaluggerattwilightinthegloomofthewintermoonrise。Thatwhichmadeascrouchinbythefire，ordrawthebed-clothesoverus，andtrytothinkofsomethingelse，wasastrangemysterioussound。

Atgreyofnight，whenthesunwasgone，andnoredinthewestremained，neitherwerestarsforthcoming，suddenlyawailingvoicerosealongthevalleys，andasoundintheair，asofpeoplerunning。Itmatterednotwhetheryoustoodonthemoor，orcrouchedbehindrocksawayfromit，ordownamongreedyplaces；allasonethesoundwouldcome，nowfromtheheartoftheearthbeneath，nowoverheadbearingdownonyou。Andthentherewasrushingofsomethingby，andmelancholylaughter，andthehairofamanwouldstandonendbeforehecouldreasonproperly。

God，inHismercy，knowsthatIamstupidenoughforanyman，andveryslowofimpression，norevercouldbringmyselftobelievethatourFatherwouldlettheevilonegettheupperhandofus。ButwhenIhadheardthatsoundthreetimes，inthelonelygloomoftheeveningfog，andthecoldthatfollowedthelinesofair，Iwasloathtogoabroadbynight，evensofarasthestables，andlovedthelightofacandlemore，andtheglowofafirewithcompany。

Thereweremanystoriesaboutit，ofcourse，alloverthebreadthofthemoorland。Butthosewhohadhearditmostoftendeclaredthatitmustbethewailofawoman’svoice，andtherustleofrobesfleeinghorribly，andfiendsinthefoggoingafterher。Tothat，however，Ipaidnoheed，whenanybodywaswithme；onlywedrewmoreclosetogether，andbarredthedoorsatsunset。

Mr。ReubenHuckaback，whommanygoodfolkinDulvertonwillrememberlongaftermytime，wasmymother’suncle，beingindeedhermother’sbrother。Heownedtheverybestshopinthetown，anddidafinetradeinsoftware，especiallywhenthepack-horsescamesafelyinatChristmas-time。Andwebeingnowhisonlykindred(exceptindeedhisgranddaughter，littleRuthHuckaback，ofwhomnoonetookanyheed)，motherbehelditaChristiandutytokeepaswellascouldbewithhim，bothforloveofaniceoldman，andforthesakeofherchildren。Andtruly，theDulvertonpeoplesaidthathewastherichestmanintheirtown，andcouldbuyuphalfthecountyarmigers；’ay，andifitcametothat，theywouldliketoseeanyman，atBampton，oratWivelscombe，andyoumightsayalmostTaunton，whocouldputdowngoldenJacobusandCarolusagainsthim。

Nowthisoldgentleman——sotheycalledhim，accordingtohismoney；andIhaveseenmanyworseones，moreviolentandlesswealthy——hemustneedscomeawaythattimetospendtheNewYear-tidewithus；notthathewantedtodoit(forhehatedcountry-life)，butbecausemymotherpressing，asmotherswilldotoagoodbagofgold，hadwrungapromisefromhim；andtheonlyboastofhislifewasthatneveryethadhebrokenhisword，atleastsinceheopenedbusiness。

NowitpleasedGodthatChristmas-time(inspiteofallthefogs)tosendsafehometoDulverton，andwhatwasmore，withtheirloadsquitesafe，agoodlystringofpackhorses。NearlyhalfoftheirchargewasforUncleReuben，andheknewhowtomakethemostofit。Thenhavingbalancedhisdebitsandcredits，andsetthewritsrunningagainstdefaulters，asbehovesagoodChristianatChristmas-tide，hesaddledhishorse，androdeofftowardsOare，withagoodstoutcoatuponhim，andleavingRuthandhisheadmanplentytodo，andlittletoeat，untiltheyshouldseehimagain。