第29章

AreyouboredwithyourDinner。AreyouboredwithyourWife？”——

that，too，wasinourGowerStreetdays。BoththesewehadinourfirstcampaignwhenweworkedLondonsouthcentral，andwest；

andthen，too，wehadourfirstposter——theHEALTH，BEAUTY，AND

STRENGTHone。Thatwashisdesign；Ihappenstilltohavegotbymethefirstsketchhemadeforit。IhavereproduceditherewithoneortwootherstoenablethereadertounderstandthementalqualitythatinitiatedthesefamiliarornamentsofLondon。

(Thesecondoneisabouteighteenmonthslater，thegermofthewell-known“Fog“poster；thethirdwasdesignedforaninfluenzaepidemic，butneverissued。)

Thesethingswereonlyincidentalinmydepartment。

Ihadtopolishthemupfortheartistandarrangethebusinessofprintinganddistribution，andaftermyunclehadhadaviolentandneedlessquarrelwiththeadvertisingmanageroftheDailyRegulatorabouttheamountofdisplaygiventooneofhishappythoughts，Ialsotookupthenegotiationsofadvertisementsforthepress。

Wediscussedandworkedoutdistributiontogetherfirstinthedrawing-roomfloorinGowerStreetwithmyauntsometimeshelpingveryshrewdly，andthen，withasteadilyimprovingtypeofcigarandolderandolderwhisky，inhissmuggeryattheirfirsthouse，theoneinBeckenham。Oftenweworkedfarintothenightsometimesuntildawn。

Wereallyworkedinfernallyhard，and，Irecall，weworkedwithaverydecidedenthusiasm，notsimplyonmyuncle’spartbutmine，Itwasagame，anabsurdbutabsurdlyinterestinggame，andthepointswerescoredincasesofbottles。Peoplethinkahappynotionisenoughtomakeamanrich，thatfortunescanbemadewithouttoil。It’sadream，aseverymillionaire(exceptoneortwoluckygamblers)cantestify；IdoubtifJ。D。RockefellerintheearlydaysofStandardOil，workedharderthanwedid。Weworkedfarintothenight——andwealsoworkedallday。Wemadearuletobealwaysdroppinginatthefactoryunannouncedtokeepthingsright——foratfirstwecouldaffordnoproperlyresponsibleunderlings——andwetraveledLondon，pretendingtobeourownrepresentativesandmakingallsortsofspecialarrangements。

Butnoneofthiswasmyspecialwork，andassoonaswecouldgetothermenin，Idroppedthetraveling，thoughmyunclefounditparticularlyinterestingandkeptitupforyears。“Doesmegood，George，toseethechapsbehindtheircounterslikeIwasonce。”heexplained。MyspecialanddistinctivedutywastogiveTono-Bungaysubstanceandanoutwardandvisiblebottle，totranslatemyuncle’sgreatimaginingsintothecreationofcaseaftercaseoflabelledbottlesofnonsense，andthepunctualdischargeofthembyrailway，roadandsteamertowardstheirultimategoalintheGreatStomachofthePeople。Byallmodernstandardsthebusinesswas，asmyunclewouldsay，“absolutelybonafide。”Wesoldourstuffandgotthemoney，andspentthemoneyhonestlyinliesandclamourtosellmorestuff。SectionbysectionwespreaditoverthewholeoftheBritishIsles；

firstworkingthemiddle-classLondonsuburbs，thentheoutersuburbs，thenthehomecounties，thengoing(withnewbillsandamorepiousstyleof“ad“)intoWales，agreatfieldalwaysforanewpatent-medicine，andthenintoLancashire。

MyunclehadinhisinnerofficeabigmapofEngland，andaswetookupfreshsectionsofthelocalpressandourconsignmentsinvadednewareas，flagsforadvertisementsandpinkunderlinesforordersshowedourprogress。

“Theromanceofmoderncommerce，George！”myunclewouldsay，rubbinghishandstogetheranddrawinginairthroughhisteeth。“Theromanceofm