第21章

wasinvited。AndIdon’tmakeanythingoftheworldoutsideeither。Whatdoyoumakeofit？”

“London。”Ibegan。“It’s——soenormous！”

“Isn’tit！Andit’salluptonothing。Youfindchapskeepinggrocers’shops——whytheDEVIL，Ponderevo，dotheykeepgrocers’

shops？Theyalldoitverycarefully，verysteadily，verymeanly。Youfindpeoplerunningaboutanddoingthemostremarkablethingsbeingpolicemen，forexample，andburglars。

Theygoaboutthesebusinessesquitegravelyandearnestly。I

somehow——can’tgoaboutmine。Isthereanysenseinitatall——anywhere？”

“Theremustbesenseinit。”Isaid。“We’reyoung。”

“We’reyoung——yes。Butonemustinquire。Thegrocer’sagrocerbecause，Isuppose，heseeshecomesinthere。Feelsthatonthewholeitamountstoacall。ButthebotherisIdon’tseewhereIcomeinatall。Doyou？”

“Whereyoucomein？”

“No，whereyoucomein。”

“Notexactly，yet。”Isaid。“Iwanttodosomegoodintheworld——something——somethingeffectual，beforeIdie。Ihaveasortofideamyscientificwork——Idon’tknow。”

“Yes。”hemused。”AndI’vegotasortofideamysculpture，——butnowitistocomeinandWHY，——I’venoideaatall。”Hehuggedhiskneesforaspace。“That’swhatpuzzlesme，Ponderevo，noend。”

Hebecameanimated。“Ifyouwilllookinthatcupboard。”hesaid，“youwillfindanoldrespectablelookingrollonaplateandaknifesomewhereandagallipotcontainingbutter。YougivethemmeandI’llmakemybreakfast，andthenifyoudon’tmindwatchingmepaddleaboutatmysimpletoiletI’llgetup。Thenwe’llgoforawalkandtalkaboutthisaffairoflifefurther。

AndaboutArtandLiteratureandanythingelsethatcropsupontheway。Yes，that’sthegallipot。Cockroachgotinit？

Chuckhimout——damnedinterloper。”

Sointhefirstfiveminutesofourtalk，asIseemtorememberitnow，oldEwartstruckthenotethatranthroughallthatmorning’sintercourse。

Tomeitwasamostmemorabletalkbecauseitopenedoutquitenewhorizonsofthought。I’dbeenworkingrathercloseandoutoftouchwithEwart’sfreegesticulatingway。Hewaspessimisticthatdayandscepticaltotheveryrootofthings。

Hemademefeelclearly，whatIhadnotfeltatallbefore，thegeneraladventurousnessoflife，particularlyoflifeatthestagewehadreached，andalsotheabsenceofdefiniteobjects，ofanyconcertedpurposeinthelivesthatweregoingonallroundus。Hemademefeel，too，howreadyIwastotakeupcommonplaceassumptions。JustasIhadalwaysimaginedthatsomewhereinsocialarrangementstherewascertainlyaHead-Masterwhowouldinterveneifonewenttoofar，soIhadalwayshadasortofimplicitbeliefthatinourEnglandthereweresomewherepeoplewhounderstoodwhatwewereall，asanation，about。Thatcrumpledintohispitofdoubtandvanished。

Hebroughtout，sharplycutandcertain，theimmenseeffectofpurposelessnessinLondonthatIwasalreadyindistinctlyfeeling。WefoundourselvesatlastreturningthroughHighgateCemeteryandWaterlowPark——andEwartwastalking。

“Lookatitthere。”hesaid，stoppingandpointingtothegreatvaleofLondonspreadin