第25章

I’vethoughtofathing。”Hewhiskedout，leavingmetoexaminethisnuclearspotatleisurewhilehisvoicebecamedictatorialwithout。Thedenstruckmeasinitslargegreydirtywayquiteunprecedentedandextraordinary。ThebottleswerealllabelledsimplyA，B，C，andsoforth，andthatdearoldapparatusabove，seenfromthisside，wasevenmorepatiently“ontheshelf“thanwhenithadbeenusedtoimpressWimblehurst。Isawnothingforitbuttositdowninthechairandawaitmyuncle’sexplanations。Iremarkedafrock-coatwithsatinlapelsbehindthedoor；therewasadignifiedumbrellainthecornerandaclothes-brushandahat-brushstoodonaside-table。Myunclereturnedinfiveminuteslookingathiswatch——agoldwatch——

“Gettin’lunch-time，George。”hesaid。“You’dbettercomeandhavelunchwithme！”

“How’sAuntSusan？”Iasked。

“Exuberant。Neversawhersolarky。Thishasbuckedherupsomethingwonderful——allthis。”

“Allwhat？”

“Tono-Bungay。”

“WhatisTono-Bungay？”Iasked。

Myunclehesitated。“Tellyouafterlunch，George。”hesaid。

“Comealong！”andhavinglockedupthesanctumafterhimself，ledthewayalonganarrowdirtypavement，linedwithbarrowsandsweptattimesbyavalanche-likeportersbearingburthenstovans，toFarringdonStreet。Hehailedapassingcabsuperbly，andthecabmanwasinfinitelyrespectful。“Schafer’s。”hesaid，andoffwewentsidebyside——andwithmemoreandmoreamazedatallthesethings——toSchafer’sHotel，thesecondofthetwobigplaceswithhugelacecurtain-coveredwindows，nearthecornerofBlackfriarsBridge。

IwillconfessIfeltamagiccharminourrelativeproportionsasthetwocolossal，pale-blue-and-redliveriedportersofSchafers’heldopentheinnerdoorsforuswitharespectfulsalutationthatinsomemannertheyseemedtoconfinewhollytomyuncle。Insteadofbeingaboutfourinchestaller，Ifeltatleastthesamesizeashe，andverymuchslenderer。Stillmorerespectful——waitersrelievedhimofthenewhatandthedignifiedumbrella，andtookhisordersforourlunch。Hegavethemwithafineassurance。

Henoddedtoseveralofthewaiters。

“Theyknowme，George，already。”hesaid。“Pointmeout。Liveplace！Eyeforcomingmen！”

Thedetailedbusinessofthelunchengagedourattentionforawhile，andthenIleantacrossmyplate。“AndNOW？”saidI。

“It’sthesecretofvigour。Didn’tyoureadthatlabel？”

“Yes，but——“

“It’ssellinglikehotcakes。”

“Andwhatisit？”Ipressed。

“Well。”saidmyuncle，andthenleantforwardandspokesoftlyundercoverofhishand，“It’snothingmoreorlessthan。”

(Buthereanunfortunatescrupleintervenes。Afterall，Tono-Bungayisstillamarketablecommodityandinthehandsofpurchasers，whoboughtitfrom——amongothervendors——me。No！I

amafraid