第4章

Chapter1。XXIV。

HowGargantuaspenthistimeinrainyweather。

Ifithappenedthattheweatherwereanythingcloudy，foul，andrainy，alltheforenoonwasemployed，asbeforespecified，accordingtocustom，withthisdifferenceonly，thattheyhadagoodclearfirelightedtocorrectthedistempersoftheair。Butafterdinner，insteadoftheirwontedexercitations，theydidabidewithin，and，bywayofapotherapy(thatis，amakingthebodyhealthfulbyexercise)，didrecreatethemselvesinbottlingupofhay，incleavingandsawingofwood，andinthreshingsheavesofcornatthebarn。Thentheystudiedtheartofpaintingorcarving；orbroughtintousetheantiqueplayoftables，asLeonicushathwrittenofit，andasourgoodfriendLascarisplayethatit。Inplayingtheyexaminedthepassagesofancientauthorswhereinthesaidplayismentionedoranymetaphordrawnfromit。Theywentlikewisetoseethedrawingofmetals，orthecastingofgreatordnance；howthelapidariesdidwork；asalsothegoldsmithsandcuttersofpreciousstones。Nordidtheyomittovisitthealchemists，money-coiners，upholsterers，weavers，velvet-workers，watchmakers，looking-glassframers，printers，organists，andothersuchkindofartificers，and，everywheregivingthemsomewhattodrink，didlearnandconsidertheindustryandinventionofthetrades。Theywentalsotohearthepubliclectures，thesolemncommencements，therepetitions，theacclamations，thepleadingsofthegentlelawyers，andsermonsofevangelicalpreachers。Hewentthroughthehallsandplacesappointedforfencing，andthereplayedagainstthemastersthemselvesatallweapons，andshowedthembyexperiencethatheknewasmuchinitas，yea，morethan，they。And，insteadofherborizing，theyvisitedtheshopsofdruggists，herbalists，andapothecaries，anddiligentlyconsideredthefruits，roots，leaves，gums，seeds，thegreaseandointmentsofsomeforeignparts，asalsohowtheydidadulteratethem。Hewenttoseethejugglers，tumblers，mountebanks，andquacksalvers，andconsideredtheircunning，theirshifts，theirsomersaultsandsmoothtongue，especiallyofthoseofChaunyinPicardy，whoarenaturallygreatpraters，andbravegiversoffibs，inmatterofgreenapes。

Attheirreturntheydideatmoresoberlyatsupperthanatothertimes，andmeatsmoredesiccativeandextenuating；totheendthattheintemperatemoistureoftheair，communicatedtothebodybyanecessaryconfinitive，mightbythismeansbecorrected，andthattheymightnotreceiveanyprejudiceforwantoftheirordinarybodilyexercise。ThuswasGargantuagoverned，andkeptoninthiscourseofeducation，fromdaytodayprofiting，asyoumayunderstandsuchayoungmanofhisagemay，ofapregnantjudgment，withgooddisciplinewellcontinued。Which，althoughatthebeginningitseemeddifficult，becamealittleaftersosweet，soeasy，andsodelightful，thatitseemedrathertherecreationofakingthanthestudyofascholar。NeverthelessPonocrates，todiverthimfromthisvehementintensionofthespirits，thoughtfit，onceinamonth，uponsomefairandclearday，togooutofthecitybetimesinthemorning，eithertowardsGentilly，orBoulogne，ortoMontrouge，orCharantonbridge，ortoVanves，orSt。Clou，andtherespendallthedaylonginmakingthegreatestcheerthatcouldbedevised，sporting，makingmerry，drinkinghealths，playing，singing，dancing，tumblinginsomefairmeadow，unnestlingofsparrows，takingofquails，andfishingforfrogsandcrabs。

Butalthoughthatdaywaspassedwithoutbooksorlecture，yetwasitnotspentwithoutprofit；forinthesaidmeadowstheyusuallyrepeatedcertainpleasantversesofVirgil\'sagriculture，ofHesiodandofPolitian\'shusbandry，wouldseta-broachsomewittyLatinepigrams，thenimmediatelyturnedthemintoroundelaysandsongsfordancingintheFrenchlanguage。

Intheirfeastingtheywouldsometimesseparatethewaterfromthewinethatwastherewithmixed，asCatoteacheth，Dererustica，andPlinywithanivycupwouldwashthewineinabasinfulofwater，thentakeitoutagainwithafunnelaspureasever。Theymadethewatergofromoneglasstoanother，andcontrivedathousandlittleautomatoryengines，thatistosay，movingofthemselves。

Chapter1。XXV。

Howtherewasgreatstrifeanddebateraisedbetwixtthecake-bakersofLerne，andthoseofGargantua\'scountry，whereuponwerewagedgreatwars。

Atthattime，whichwastheseasonofvintage，inthebeginningofharvest，whenthecountryshepherdsweresettokeepthevines，andhinderthestarlingsfromeatingupthegrapes，assomecake-bakersofLernehappenedtopassalonginthebroadhighway，drivingintothecitytenortwelvehorsesloadedwithcakes，thesaidshepherdscourteouslyentreatedthemtogivethemsomefortheirmoney，asthepricethenruledinthemarket。Forhereitistoberemarked，thatitisacelestialfoodtoeatforbreakfasthotfreshcakeswithgrapes，especiallythefrailclusters，thegreatredgrapes，themuscadine，theverjuicegrape，andthelaskard，forthosethatarecostiveintheirbelly，becauseitwillmakethemgushout，andsquirtthelengthofahunter\'sstaff，liketheverytapofabarrel；andoftentimes，thinkingtoletasquib，theydidall-to-besquatterandconskitethemselves，whereupontheyarecommonlycalledthevintagethinkers。Thebun-sellersorcake-makerswereinnothinginclinabletotheirrequest；but，whichwasworse，didinjurethemmostoutrageously，calledthemprattlinggabblers，lickorousgluttons，freckledbittors，mangyrascals，shite-a-bedscoundrels，drunkenroysters，slyknaves，drowsyloiterers，slapsaucefellows，slabberdegulliondruggels，lubberlylouts，cozeningfoxes，ruffianrogues，paltrycustomers，sycophant-varlets，drawlatchhoydens，floutingmilksops，jeeringcompanions，staringclowns，forlornsnakes，ninnylobcocks，scurvysneaksbies，fondlingfops，baseloons，saucycoxcombs，idlelusks，scoffingbraggarts，noddymeacocks，blockishgrutnols，doddipol-joltheads，jobbernolgoosecaps，foolishloggerheads，flutchcalf-lollies，groutheadgnat-snappers，lob-dotterels，gapingchangelings，codsheadloobies，woodcockslangams，ninny-hammerflycatchers，noddypeaksimpletons，turdygut，shittenshepherds，andothersuchlikedefamatoryepithets；sayingfurther，thatitwasnotforthemtoeatofthesedaintycakes，butmightverywellcontentthemselveswiththecoarseunrangedbread，ortoeatofthegreatbrownhouseholdloaf。Towhichprovokingwords，oneamongstthem，calledForgier，anhonestfellowofhispersonandanotablespringal，madeanswerverycalmlythus:Howlongisitsinceyouhavegothorns，thatyouarebecomesoproud？Indeedformerlyyouwerewonttogiveussomefreely，andwillyounotnowletushaveanyforourmoney？Thisisnotthepartofgoodneighbours，neitherdoweserveyouthuswhenyoucomehithertobuyourgoodcorn，whereofyoumakeyourcakesandbuns。Besidesthat，wewouldhavegivenyoutothebargainsomeofourgrapes，but，byhiszounds，youmaychancetorepentit，andpossiblyhaveneedofusatanothertime，whenweshalluseyouafterthelikemanner，andthereforerememberit。ThenMarquet，aprimemanintheconfraternityofthecake-bakers，saiduntohim，Yea，sir，thouartprettywellcrest-risenthismorning，thoudidsteatyesternighttoomuchmilletandbolymong。Comehither，sirrah，comehither，Iwillgivetheesomecakes。WhereuponForgier，dreadingnoharm，inallsimplicitywenttowardshim，anddrewasixpenceoutofhisleathersatchel，thinkingthatMarquetwouldhavesoldhimsomeofhiscakes。But，insteadofcakes，hegavehimwithhiswhipsucharudelashoverthwartthelegs，thatthemarksofthewhipcordknotswereapparentinthem，thenwouldhavefledaway；butForgiercriedoutasloudashecould，O，murder，murder，help，help，help！andinthemeantimethrewagreatcudgelafterhim，whichhecarriedunderhisarm，wherewithhehithiminthecoronaljointofhishead，uponthecrotaphicarteryoftherightsidethereof，soforcibly，thatMarquetfelldownfromhismaremorelikeadeadthanlivingman。

Meanwhilethefarmersandcountryswains，thatwerewatchingtheirwalnutsneartothatplace，camerunningwiththeirgreatpolesandlongstaves，andlaidsuchloadonthesecake-bakers，asiftheyhadbeentothreshupongreenrye。Theothershepherdsandshepherdesses，hearingthelamentableshoutofForgier，camewiththeirslingsandslackiesfollowingthem，andthrowinggreatstonesatthem，asthickasifithadbeenhail。Atlasttheyovertookthem，andtookfromthemaboutfourorfivedozenoftheircakes。Neverthelesstheypaidforthemtheordinaryprice，andgavethemoverandaboveonehundredeggsandthreebasketsfullofmulberries。Thendidthecake-bakershelptogetuptohismareMarquet，whowasmostshrewdlywounded，andforthwithreturnedtoLerne，changingtheresolutiontheyhadtogotoPareille，threateningverysharpandboisterouslythecowherds，shepherds，andfarmersofSevilleandSinays。Thisdone，theshepherdsandshepherdessesmademerrywiththesecakesandfinegrapes，andsportedthemselvestogetheratthesoundoftheprettysmallpipe，scoffingandlaughingatthosevaingloriouscake-bakers，whohadthatdaymetwithamischiefforwantofcrossingthemselveswithagoodhandinthemorning。NordidtheyforgettoapplytoForgier\'slegsomefairgreatredmedicinalgrapes，andsohandsomelydresseditandbounditupthathewasquicklycured。

Chapter1。XXVI。

HowtheinhabitantsofLerne，bythecommandmentofPicrocholetheirking，assaultedtheshepherdsofGargantuaunexpectedlyandonasudden。

Thecake-bakers，beingreturnedtoLerne，wentpresently，beforetheydideithereatordrink，totheCapitol，andtherebeforetheirking，calledPicrochole，thethirdofthatname，madetheircomplaint，showingtheirpanniersbroken，theircapsallcrumpled，theircoatstorn，theircakestakenaway，but，aboveall，Marquetmostenormouslywounded，sayingthatallthatmischiefwasdonebytheshepherdsandherdsmenofGrangousier，nearthebroadhighwaybeyondSeville。Picrocholeincontinentgrewangryandfurious；and，withoutaskinganyfurtherwhat，how，why，orwherefore，commandedthebanandarrierebantobesoundedthroughoutallhiscountry，thatallhisvassalsofwhatconditionsoevershould，uponpainofthehalter，come，inthebestarmstheycould，untothegreatplacebeforethecastle，atthehourofnoon，and，thebettertostrengthenhisdesign，hecausedthedrumtobebeataboutthetown。Himself，whilsthisdinnerwasmakingready，wenttoseehisartillerymounteduponthecarriage，todisplayhiscolours，andsetupthegreatroyalstandard，andloadedwainswithstoreofammunitionbothforthefieldandthebelly，armsandvictuals。Atdinnerhedespatchedhiscommissions，andbyhisexpressedictmyLordShagragwasappointedtocommandthevanguard，whereinwerenumberedsixteenthousandandfourteenarquebusiersorfirelocks，togetherwiththirtythousandandelevenvolunteeradventurers。ThegreatTouquedillon，masterofthehorse，hadthechargeoftheordnance，whereinwerereckonedninehundredandfourteenbrazenpieces，incannons，doublecannons，basilisks，serpentines，culverins，bombardsormurderers，falcons，basesorpassevolins，spirols，andothersortsofgreatguns。TherearguardwascommittedtotheDukeofScrapegood。Inthemainbattlewasthekingandtheprincesofhiskingdom。Thusbeinghastilyfurnished，beforetheywouldsetforward，theysentthreehundredlighthorsemen，undertheconductofCaptainSwillwind，todiscoverthecountry，cleartheavenues，andseewhethertherewasanyambushlaidforthem。But，aftertheyhadmadediligentsearch，theyfoundallthelandroundaboutinpeaceandquiet，withoutanymeetingorconventionatall；whichPicrocholeunderstanding，commandedthateveryoneshouldmarchspeedilyunderhiscolours。Thenimmediatelyinalldisorder，withoutkeepingeitherrankorfile，theytookthefieldsoneamongstanother，wasting，spoiling，destroying，andmakinghavocofallwherevertheywent，notsparingpoornorrich，privilegedorunprivilegedplaces，churchnorlaity，droveawayoxenandcows，bulls，calves，heifers，wethers，ewes，lambs，goats，kids，hens，capons，chickens，geese，ganders，goslings，hogs，swine，pigs，andsuchlike；beatingdownthewalnuts，pluckingthegrapes，tearingthehedges，shakingthefruit-trees，andcommittingsuchincomparableabuses，thatthelikeabominationwasneverheardof。Nevertheless，theymetwithnonetoresistthem，foreveryonesubmittedtotheirmercy，beseechingthemthattheymightbedealtwithcourteouslyinregardthattheyhadalwayscarriedthemselvesasbecamegoodandlovingneighbours，andthattheyhadneverbeenguiltyofanywrongoroutragedoneuponthem，tobethussuddenlysurprised，troubled，anddisquieted，andthat，iftheywouldnotdesist，Godwouldpunishthemveryshortly。Towhichexpostulationsandremonstrancesnootheranswerwasmade，butthattheywouldteachthemtoeatcakes。

Chapter1。XXVII。

HowamonkofSevillesavedthecloseoftheabbeyfrombeingransackedbytheenemy。

Somuchtheydid，andsofartheywentpillagingandstealing，thatatlasttheycametoSeville，wheretheyrobbedbothmenandwomen，andtookalltheycouldcatch:nothingwaseithertoohotortooheavyforthem。

Althoughtheplaguewasthereinthemostpartofallthehouses，theyneverthelessenteredeverywhere，thenplunderedandcarriedawayallthatwaswithin，andyetforallthisnotoneofthemtookanyhurt，whichisamostwonderfulcase。Forthecurates，vicars，preachers，physicians，chirurgeons，andapothecaries，whowenttovisit，todress，tocure，toheal，topreachuntoandadmonishthosethatweresick，werealldeadoftheinfection，andthesedevilishrobbersandmurdererscaughtneveranyharmatall。Whencecomesthistopass，mymasters？Ibeseechyouthinkuponit。Thetownbeingthuspillaged，theywentuntotheabbeywithahorriblenoiseandtumult，buttheyfounditshutandmadefastagainstthem。WhereuponthebodyofthearmymarchedforwardtowardsapassorfordcalledtheGuedeVede，exceptsevencompaniesoffootandtwohundredlancers，who，stayingthere，brokedownthewallsoftheclose，towaste，spoil，andmakehavocofallthevinesandvintagewithinthatplace。Themonks(poordevils)knewnotinthatextremitytowhichofalltheirsanctstheyshouldvowthemselves。Nevertheless，atalladventurestheyrangthebellsadcapitulumcapitulantes。Thereitwasdecreedthattheyshouldmakeafairprocession，stuffedwithgoodlectures，prayers，andlitaniescontrahostiuminsidias，andjollyresponsespropace。

Therewasthenintheabbeyaclaustralmonk，calledFriarJohnofthefunnelsandgobbets，inFrenchdesentoumeures，young，gallant，frisk，lusty，nimble，quick，active，bold，adventurous，resolute，tall，lean，wide-mouthed，long-nosed，afairdespatcherofmorningprayers，unbridlerofmasses，andrunneroverofvigils；and，toconcludesummarilyinaword，arightmonk，ifevertherewasany，sincethemonkingworldmonkedamonkery:fortherest，aclerkeventotheteethinmatterofbreviary。

Thismonk，hearingthenoisethattheenemymadewithintheenclosureofthevineyard，wentouttoseewhattheyweredoing；andperceivingthattheywerecuttingandgatheringthegrapes，whereonwasgroundedthefoundationofalltheirnextyear\'swine，returneduntothechoirofthechurchwheretheothermonkswere，allamazedandastonishedlikesomanybell-melters。Whomwhenheheardsing，im，nim，pe，ne，ne，ne，ne，nene，tum，ne，num，num，ini，imi，co，o，no，o，o，neno，ne，no，no，no，rum，nenum，num:Itiswellshit，wellsung，saidhe。BythevirtueofGod，whydonotyousing，Panniers，farewell，vintageisdone？Thedevilsnatchme，iftheybenotalreadywithinthemiddleofourclose，andcutsowellbothvinesandgrapes，that，byCod\'sbody，therewillnotbefoundforthesefouryearstocomesomuchasagleaninginit。BythebellyofSanctJames，whatshallwepoordevilsdrinkthewhile？LordGod！damihipotum。Thensaidtheprioroftheconvent:Whatshouldthisdrunkenfellowdohere？lethimbecarriedtoprisonfortroublingthedivineservice。Nay，saidthemonk，thewineservice，letusbehaveourselvessothatitbenottroubled；foryouyourself，mylordprior，lovetodrinkofthebest，andsodotheveryhonestman。Neveryetdidamanofworthdislikegoodwine，itisamonasticalapophthegm。Buttheseresponsesthatyouchanthere，byG——，arenotinseason。Whereforeisit，thatourdevotionswereinstitutedtobeshortinthetimeofharvestandvintage，andlongintheadvent，andallthewinter？Thelatefriar，Massepelosse，ofgoodmemory，atruezealousman，orelseIgivemyselftothedevil，ofourreligion，toldme，andIrememberitwell，howthereasonwas，thatinthisseasonwemightpressandmakethewine，andinwinterwhiffitup。

Harkyou，mymasters，youthatlovethewine，Cop\'sbody，followme；forSanctAnthonyburnmeasfreelyasafaggot，iftheygetleavetotasteonedropoftheliquorthatwillnotnowcomeandfightforreliefofthevine。

Hog\'sbelly，thegoodsofthechurch！Ha，no，no。Whatthedevil，SanctThomasofEnglandwaswellcontenttodieforthem；ifIdiedinthesamecause，shouldnotIbeasanctlikewise？Yes。YetshallnotIdiethereforallthis，foritisIthatmustdoittoothersandsendthema-

packing。

Ashespakethishethrewoffhisgreatmonk\'shabit，andlaidholduponthestaffofthecross，whichwasmadeoftheheartofasorbapple-tree，itbeingofthelengthofalance，round，ofafullgrip，andalittlepowderedwithliliescalledflowerdeluce，theworkmanshipwhereofwasalmostalldefacedandwornout。Thuswentheoutinafairlong-skirtedjacket，puttinghisfrockscarfwiseathwarthisbreast，andinthisequipage，withhisstaff，shaftortruncheonofthecross，laidonsolustily，brisk，andfiercelyuponhisenemies，who，withoutanyorder，orensign，ortrumpet，ordrum，werebusiedingatheringthegrapesofthevineyard。Forthecornets，guidons，andensign-bearershadlaiddowntheirstandards，banners，andcoloursbythewallsides:thedrummershadknockedouttheheadsoftheirdrumsononeendtofillthemwithgrapes:

thetrumpeterswereloadedwithgreatbundlesofbunchesandhugeknotsofclusters:insum，everyoneofthemwasoutofarray，andallindisorder。

Hehurried，therefore，uponthemsorudely，withoutcryinggareorbeware，thatheoverthrewthemlikehogs，tumbledthemoverlikeswine，strikingathwartandalongst，andbyonemeansorotherlaidsoabouthim，aftertheoldfashionoffencing，thattosomehebeatouttheirbrains，toothershecrushedtheirarms，batteredtheirlegs，andbethwackedtheirsidestilltheirribscrackedwithit。Toothersagainheunjointedthespondylesorknucklesoftheneck，disfiguredtheirchaps，gashedtheirfaces，madetheircheekshangflappingontheirchin，andsoswingedandbalammedthemthattheyfelldownbeforehimlikehaybeforeamower。Tosomeothershespoiledtheframeoftheirkidneys，marredtheirbacks，broketheirthigh-

bones，pashedintheirnoses，poachedouttheireyes，clefttheirmandibles，toretheirjaws，dungintheirteethintotheirthroat，shookasundertheiromoplatesorshoulder-blades，sphacelatedtheirshins，mortifiedtheirshanks，inflamedtheirankles，heavedoffofthehingestheirishies，theirsciaticaorhip-gout，dislocatedthejointsoftheirknees，squatteredintopiecestheboughtsorpestlesoftheirthighs，andsothumped，mauledandbelabouredthemeverywhere，thatneverwascornsothickandthreefoldthresheduponbyploughmen\'sflailsaswerethepitifullydisjointedmembersoftheirmangledbodiesunderthemercilessbatonofthecross。Ifanyofferedtohidehimselfamongstthethickestofthevines，helaidhimsquatasaflounder，bruisedtheridgeofhisback，anddashedhisreinslikeadog。Ifanythoughtbyflighttoescape，hemadehisheadtoflyinpiecesbythelamboidalcommissure，whichisaseaminthehinderpartoftheskull。Ifanyonedidscrambleupintoatree，thinkingtheretobesafe，herentuphisperinee，andimpaledhiminatthefundament。Ifanyofhisoldacquaintancehappenedtocryout，Ha，FriarJohn，myfriendFriarJohn，quarter，quarter，Iyieldmyselftoyou，toyouIrendermyself！Sothoushalt，saidhe，andmust，whetherthouwouldstorno，andwithalrenderandyieldupthysoultoallthedevilsinhell；thensuddenlygavethemdronos，thatis，somanyknocks，thumps，raps，dints，thwacks，andbangs，assufficedtowarnPlutooftheircominganddespatchthema-going。Ifanywassorashandfulloftemerityastoresisthimtohisface，thenwasithedidshowthestrengthofhismuscles，forwithoutmoreadohedidtranspiercehim，byrunninghiminatthebreast，throughthemediastineandtheheart。Others，again，hesoquashedandbebumped，that，withasoundbounceunderthehollowoftheirshortribs，heoverturnedtheirstomachssothattheydiedimmediately。Tosome，withasmartsouseontheepigaster，hewouldmaketheirmidriffswag，then，redoublingtheblow，gavethemsuchahomepushonthenavelthathemadetheirpuddingstogushout。Toothersthroughtheirballockshepiercedtheirbumgut，andleftnotbowel，tripe，norentrailintheirbodythathadnotfelttheimpetuosity，fierceness，andfuryofhisviolence。Believe，thatitwasthemosthorriblespectaclethateveronesaw。SomecrieduntoSanctBarbe，otherstoSt。George。OtheholyLadyNytouch，saidone，thegoodSanctess；OourLadyofSuccours，saidanother，help，help！Otherscried，OurLadyofCunaut，ofLoretto，ofGoodTidings，ontheothersideofthewaterSt。MaryOver。SomevowedapilgrimagetoSt。James，andotherstotheholyhandkerchiefatChamberry，whichthreemonthsafterthatburntsowellinthefirethattheycouldnotgetonethreadofitsaved。OtherssentuptheirvowstoSt。Cadouin，otherstoSt。Johnd\'Angely，andtoSt。EutropiusofXaintes。OthersagaininvokedSt。MesmesofChinon，St。MartinofCandes，St。ClouaudofSinays，theholyrelicsofLaurezay，withathousandotherjollylittlesanctsandsantrels。

Somediedwithoutspeaking，othersspokewithoutdying；somediedinspeaking，othersspokeindying。OthersshoutedasloudastheycouldConfession，Confession，Confiteor，Miserere，Inmanus！Sogreatwasthecryofthewounded，thattheprioroftheabbeywithallhismonkscameforth，who，whentheysawthesepoorwretchessoslainamongstthevines，andwoundedtodeath，confessedsomeofthem。Butwhilstthepriestswerebusiedinconfessingthem，thelittlemonkiesranalltotheplacewhereFriarJohnwas，andaskedhimwhereinhewouldbepleasedtorequiretheirassistance。Towhichheansweredthattheyshouldcutthethroatsofthosehehadthrowndownupontheground。Theypresently，leavingtheirouterhabitsandcowlsupontherails，begantothrottleandmakeanendofthosewhomhehadalreadycrushed。Canyoutellwithwhatinstrumentstheydidit？Withfairgullies，whicharelittlehulchbackeddemi-knives，theirontoolwhereofistwoincheslong，andthewoodenhandleoneinchthick，andthreeinchesinlength，wherewiththelittleboysinourcountrycutripewalnutsintwowhiletheyareyetintheshell，andpickoutthekernel，andtheyfoundthemveryfitfortheexpeditingofthatweasand-slittingexploit。InthemeantimeFriarJohn，withhisformidablebatonofthecross，gottothebreachwhichtheenemieshadmade，andtherestoodtosnatchupthosethatendeavouredtoescape。Someofthemonkitoscarriedthestandards，banners，ensigns，guidons，andcoloursintotheircellsandchamberstomakegartersofthem。Butwhenthosethathadbeenshrivenwouldhavegoneoutatthegapofthesaidbreach，thesturdymonkquashedandfelledthemdownwithblows，saying，Thesemenhavehadconfessionandarepenitentsouls；theyhavegottheirabsolutionandgainedthepardons；

theygointoparadiseasstraightasasickle，orasthewayistoFaye(likeCrooked-LaneatEastcheap)。Thusbyhisprowessandvalourwerediscomfitedallthoseofthearmythatenteredintothecloseoftheabbey，untothenumberofthirteenthousand，sixhundred，twentyandtwo，besidesthewomenandlittlechildren，whichisalwaystobeunderstood。NeverdidMaugistheHermitbearhimselfmorevaliantlywithhisbourdonorpilgrim\'sstaffagainsttheSaracens，ofwhomiswrittenintheActsofthefoursonsofAymon，thandidthismonkagainsthisenemieswiththestaffofthecross。

Chapter1。XXVIII。

HowPicrocholestormedandtookbyassaulttherockClermond，andofGrangousier\'sunwillingnessandaversionfromtheundertakingofwar。

Whilstthemonkdidthusskirmish，aswehavesaid，againstthosewhichwereenteredwithintheclose，PicrocholeingreathastepassedthefordofVede——averyespecialpass——withallhissoldiers，andsetupontherockClermond，wheretherewasmadehimnoresistanceatall；and，becauseitwasalreadynight，heresolvedtoquarterhimselfandhisarmyinthattown，andtorefreshhimselfofhispugnativecholer。Inthemorninghestormedandtookthebulwarksandcastle，whichafterwardshefortifiedwithrampiers，andfurnishedwithallammunitionrequisite，intendingtomakehisretreatthere，ifheshouldhappentobeotherwiseworsted；foritwasastrongplace，bothbyartandnature，inregardofthestanceandsituationofit。Butletusleavethemthere，andreturntoourgoodGargantua，whoisatParisveryassiduousandearnestatthestudyofgoodlettersandathleticalexercitations，andtothegoodoldmanGrangousierhisfather，whoaftersupperwarmethhisballocksbyagood，clear，greatfire，and，waitinguponthebroilingofsomechestnuts，isveryseriousindrawingscratchesonthehearth，withastickburntattheoneend，wherewiththeydidstirupthefire，tellingtohiswifeandtherestofthefamilypleasantoldstoriesandtalesofformertimes。

Whilsthewasthusemployed，oneoftheshepherdswhichdidkeepthevines，namedPillot，cametowardshim，andtothefullrelatedtheenormousabuseswhichwerecommitted，andtheexcessivespoilthatwasmadebyPicrochole，KingofLerne，uponhislandsandterritories，andhowhehadpillaged，wasted，andransackedallthecountry，excepttheenclosureatSeville，whichFriarJohndesEntoumeurestohisgreathonourhadpreserved；andthatatthesamepresenttimethesaidkingwasintherockClermond，andthere，withgreatindustryandcircumspection，wasstrengtheninghimselfandhiswholearmy。Halas，halas，alas！saidGrangousier，whatisthis，goodpeople？DoIdream，orisittruethattheytellme？Picrochole，myancientfriendofoldtime，ofmyownkindredandalliance，comeshetoinvademe？Whatmoveshim？Whatprovokeshim？Whatsetshimon？Whatdriveshimtoit？Whohathgivenhimthiscounsel？Ho，ho，ho，ho，ho，myGod，mySaviour，helpme，inspireme，andadvisemewhatIshalldo！I

protest，Iswearbeforethee，sobethoufavourabletome，ifeverIdidhimorhissubjectsanydamageordispleasure，orcommittedanytheleastrobberyinhiscountry；but，onthecontrary，Ihavesuccouredandsuppliedhimwithmen，money，friendship，andcounsel，uponanyoccasionwhereinI

couldbesteadablefortheimprovementofhisgood。Thathehaththereforeatthisnickoftimesooutragedandwrongedme，itcannotbebutbythemalevolentandwickedspirit。GoodGod，thouknowestmycourage，fornothingcanbehiddenfromthee。Ifperhapshebegrownmad，andthatthouhastsenthimhithertomeforthebetterrecoveryandre-establishmentofhisbrain，grantmepowerandwisdomtobringhimtotheyokeofthyholywillbygooddiscipline。Ho，ho，ho，ho，mygoodpeople，myfriendsandmyfaithfulservants，mustIhinderyoufromhelpingme？Alas，myoldagerequiredhence-forwardnothingelsebutrest，andallthedaysofmylifeI

havelabouredfornothingsomuchaspeace；butnowImust，Iseeitwell，loadwitharmsmypoor，weary，andfeebleshoulders，andtakeinmytremblinghandthelanceandhorseman\'smace，tosuccourandprotectmyhonestsubjects。Reasonwillhaveitso；forbytheirlabouramI

entertained，andwiththeirsweatamInourished，I，mychildrenandmyfamily。Thisnotwithstanding，Iwillnotundertakewar，untilIhavefirsttriedallthewaysandmeansofpeace:thatIresolveupon。

Thenassembledhehiscouncil，andproposedthematterasitwasindeed。

WhereuponitwasconcludedthattheyshouldsendsomediscreetmanuntoPicrochole，toknowwhereforehehadthussuddenlybrokenthepeaceandinvadedthoselandsuntowhichhehadnorightnortitle。Furthermore，thattheyshouldsendforGargantua，andthoseunderhiscommand，forthepreservationofthecountry，anddefencethereofnowatneed。AllthispleasedGrangousierverywell，andhecommandedthatsoitshouldbedone。

PresentlythereforehesenttheBasquehislackeytofetchGargantuawithalldiligence，andwrotehimasfolloweth。

Chapter1。XXIX。

ThetenouroftheletterwhichGrangousierwrotetohissonGargantua。

ThefervencyofthystudiesdidrequirethatIshouldnotinalongtimerecalltheefromthatphilosophicalrestthounowenjoyest，iftheconfidencereposedinourfriendsandancientconfederateshadnotatthispresentdisappointedtheassuranceofmyoldage。Butseeingsuchismyfataldestiny，thatIshouldbenowdisquietedbythoseinwhomItrustedmost，Iamforcedtocalltheebacktohelpthepeopleandgoodswhichbytherightofnaturebelonguntothee。Forevenasarmsareweakabroad，iftherebenotcounselathome，soisthatstudyvainandcounselunprofitablewhichinadueandconvenienttimeisnotbyvirtueexecutedandputineffect。Mydeliberationisnottoprovoke，buttoappease——nottoassault，buttodefend——nottoconquer，buttopreservemyfaithfulsubjectsandhereditarydominions，intowhichPicrocholeisenteredinahostilemannerwithoutanygroundorcause，andfromdaytodaypursuethhisfuriousenterprisewiththatheightofinsolencethatisintolerabletofreebornspirits。Ihaveendeavouredtomoderatehistyrannicalcholer，offeringhimallthatwhichIthoughtmightgivehimsatisfaction；andoftentimeshaveIsentlovinglyuntohimtounderstandwherein，bywhom，andhowhefoundhimselftobewronged。ButofhimcouldIobtainnootheranswerbutameredefiance，andthatinmylandshedidpretendonlytotherightofacivilcorrespondencyandgoodbehaviour，wherebyIknewthattheeternalGodhathlefthimtothedisposureofhisownfreewillandsensualappetite——whichcannotchoosebutbewicked，ifbydivinegraceitbenotcontinuallyguided——andtocontainhimwithinhisduty，andbringhimtoknowhimself，hathsenthimhithertomebyagrievoustoken。Therefore，mybelovedson，assoonasthoucanst，uponsightoftheseletters，repairhitherwithalldiligence，tosuccournotmesomuch，whichneverthelessbynaturalpietythououghtesttodo，asthineownpeople，whichbyreasonthoumayestsaveandpreserve。Theexploitshouldbedonewithaslittleeffusionofbloodasmaybe。And，ifpossible，bymeansfarmoreexpedient，suchasmilitarypolicy，devices，andstratagemsofwar，weshallsaveallthesouls，andsendthemhomeasmerryascricketsuntotheirownhouses。Mydearestson，thepeaceofJesusChristourRedeemerbewiththee。SalutefrommePonocrates，Gymnastes，andEudemon。ThetwentiethofSeptember。

ThyFatherGrangousier。

Chapter1。XXX。

HowUlricGalletwassentuntoPicrochole。

Thelettersbeingdictated，signed，andsealed，GrangousierordainedthatUlricGallet，masteroftherequests，averywiseanddiscreetman，ofwhoseprudenceandsoundjudgmenthehadmadetrialinseveraldifficultanddebatefulmatters，(should)gountoPicrochole，toshowwhathadbeendecreedamongstthem。AtthesamehourdepartedthegoodmanGallet，andhavingpassedtheford，askedatthemillerthatdweltthereinwhatconditionPicrocholewas:whoansweredhimthathissoldiershadlefthimneithercocknorhen，thattheywereretiredandshutupintotherockClermond，andthathewouldnotadvisehimtogoanyfurtherforfearofthescouts，becausetheywereenormouslyfurious。Whichheeasilybelieved，andthereforelodgedthatnightwiththemiller。

Thenextmorninghewentwithatrumpetertothegateofthecastle，andrequiredtheguardshemightbeadmittedtospeakwiththekingofsomewhatthatconcernedhim。Thesewordsbeingtolduntotheking，hewouldbynomeansconsentthattheyshouldopenthegate；but，gettinguponthetopofthebulwark，saiduntotheambassador，Whatisthenews，whathaveyoutosay？Thentheambassadorbegantospeakasfolloweth。

Chapter1。XXXI。

ThespeechmadebyGallettoPicrochole。

Therecannotariseamongstmenajustercauseofgriefthanwhentheyreceivehurtanddamagewheretheymayjustlyexpectforfavourandgoodwill；andnotwithoutcause，thoughwithoutreason，havemany，aftertheyhadfallenintosuchacalamitousaccident，esteemedthisindignitylesssupportablethanthelossoftheirownlives，insuchsortthat，iftheyhavenotbeenablebyforceofarmsnoranyothermeans，byreachofwitorsubtlety，tostopthemintheircourseandrestraintheirfury，theyhavefallenintodesperation，andutterlydeprivedthemselvesofthislight。ItisthereforenowonderifKingGrangousier，mymaster，befullofhighdispleasureandmuchdisquietedinminduponthyoutrageousandhostilecoming；buttrulyitwouldbeamarvelifhewerenotsensibleofandmovedwiththeincomparableabusesandinjuriesperpetratedbytheeandthineuponthoseofhiscountry，towardswhomtherehathbeennoexampleofinhumanityomitted。Whichinitselfistohimsogrievous，forthecordialaffectionwherewithhehathalwayscherishedhissubjects，thatmoreitcannotbetoanymortalman；yetinthis，abovehumanapprehension，isittohimthemoregrievousthatthesewrongsandsadoffenceshavebeencommittedbytheeandthine，who，timeoutofmind，fromallantiquity，thouandthypredecessorshavebeeninacontinualleagueandamitywithhimandallhisancestors；which，evenuntilthistime，youhaveassacredtogetherinviolablypreserved，kept，andentertained，sowell，thatnotheandhisonly，buttheverybarbarousnationsofthePoictevins，Bretons，Manceaux，andthosethatdwellbeyondtheislesoftheCanaries，andthatofIsabella，havethoughtitaseasytopulldownthefirmament，andtosetupthedepthsabovetheclouds，astomakeabreachinyouralliance；andhavebeensoafraidofitintheirenterprisesthattheyhaveneverdaredtoprovoke，incense，orendamagetheoneforfearoftheother。Nay，whichismore，thissacredleaguehathsofilledtheworld，thattherearefewnationsatthisdayinhabitingthroughoutallthecontinentandislesoftheocean，whohavenotambitiouslyaspiredtobereceivedintoit，uponyourowncovenantsandconditions，holdingyourjointconfederacyinashighesteemastheirownterritoriesanddominions，insuchsort，thatfromthememoryofmantherehathnotbeeneitherprinceorleaguesowildandproudthatdursthaveofferedtoinvade，Isaynotyourcountries，butnotsomuchasthoseofyourconfederates。Andif，byrashandheadycounsel，theyhaveattemptedanynewdesignagainstthem，assoonastheyheardthenameandtitleofyouralliance，theyhavesuddenlydesistedfromtheirenterprises。Whatrageandmadness，therefore，dothnowincitethee，alloldallianceinfringed，allamitytrodunderfoot，andallrightviolated，thusinahostilemannertoinvadehiscountry，withouthavingbeenbyhimorhisinanythingprejudiced，wronged，orprovoked？Whereisfaith？

Whereislaw？Whereisreason？Whereishumanity？WhereisthefearofGod？DostthouthinkthattheseatrociousabusesarehiddenfromtheeternalspiritandthesupremeGodwhoisthejustrewarderofallourundertakings？Ifthousothink，thoudeceivestthyself；forallthingsshallcometopassasinhisincomprehensiblejudgmenthehathappointed。

Isitthyfataldestiny，orinfluencesofthestars，thatwouldputanendtothysolongenjoyedeastandrest？Forthatallthingshavetheirendandperiod，soasthat，whentheyarecometothesuperlativepointoftheirgreatestheight，theyareinatricetumbleddownagain，asnotbeingabletoabidelonginthatstate。Thisistheconclusionandendofthosewhocannotbyreasonandtemperancemoderatetheirfortunesandprosperities。Butifitbepredestinatedthatthyhappinessandeasemustnowcometoanend，mustitneedsbebywrongingmyking，——himbywhomthouwertestablished？Ifthyhousemustcometoruin，shoulditthereforeinitsfallcrushtheheelsofhimthatsetitup？Thematterissounreasonable，andsodissonantfromcommonsense，thathardlycanitbeconceivedbyhumanunderstanding，andaltogetherincredibleuntostrangers，tillbythecertainandundoubtedeffectsthereofitbemadeapparentthatnothingiseithersacredorholytothosewho，havingemancipatedthemselvesfromGodandreason，domerelyfollowtheperverseaffectionsoftheirowndepravednature。Ifanywronghadbeendonebyustothysubjectsanddominions——ifwehadfavouredthyill-willers——ifwehadnotassistedtheeinthyneed——ifthynameandreputationhadbeenwoundedbyus——or，tospeakmoretruly，ifthecalumniatingspirit，temptingtoinducetheetoevil，had，byfalseillusionsanddeceitfulfantasies，putintothyconceittheimpressionofathoughtthatwehaddoneuntotheeanythingunworthyofourancientcorrespondenceandfriendship，thououghtestfirsttohaveinquiredoutthetruth，andafterwardsbyaseasonablewarningtoadmonishusthereof；andweshouldhavesosatisfiedthee，accordingtothineownheart\'sdesire，thatthoushouldsthavehadoccasiontobecontented。But，OeternalGod，whatisthyenterprise？Wouldstthou，likeaperfidioustyrant，thusspoilandlaywastemymaster\'skingdom？Hastthoufoundhimsosillyandblockish，thathewouldnot——orsodestituteofmenandmoney，ofcounselandskillinmilitarydiscipline，thathecannotwithstandthyunjustinvasion？Marchhencepresently，andto-morrow，sometimeoftheday，retreatuntothineowncountry，withoutdoinganykindofviolenceordisorderlyactbytheway；andpaywithalathousandbesansofgold(which，inEnglishmoney，amountethtofivethousandpounds)，forreparationofthedamagesthouhastdoneinthiscountry。Halfthoushaltpayto-morrow，andtheotherhalfattheidesofMaynextcoming，leavingwithusinthemeantime，forhostages，theDukesofTurnbank，Lowbuttock，andSmalltrash，togetherwiththePrinceofItchesandViscountofSnatchbit(Tournemoule，Bas-de-fesses，Menuail，Gratelles，Morpiaille。)。

Chapter1。XXXII。

HowGrangousier，tobuypeace，causedthecakestoberestored。

WiththatthegoodmanGalletheldhispeace，butPicrocholetoallhisdiscourseanswerednothingbutComeandfetchthem，comeandfetchthem，——

theyhaveballocksfairandsoft，——theywillkneadandprovidesomecakesforyou。ThenreturnedhetoGrangousier，whomhefounduponhiskneesbareheaded，crouchinginalittlecornerofhiscabinet，andhumblyprayinguntoGodthathewouldvouchsafetoassuagethecholerofPicrochole，andbringhimtotheruleofreasonwithoutproceedingbyforce。Whenthegoodmancameback，heaskedhim，Ha，myfriend，whatnewsdoyoubringme？

Thereisneitherhopenorremedy，saidGallet；themanisquiteoutofhiswits，andforsakenofGod。Yea，but，saidGrangousier，myfriend，whatcausedothhepretendforhisoutrages？Hedidnotshowmeanycauseatall，saidGallet，onlythatinagreatangerhespokesomewordsofcakes。

Icannottelliftheyhavedoneanywrongtohiscake-bakers。Iwillknow，saidGrangousier，thematterthoroughly，beforeIresolveanymoreuponwhatistobedone。Thensenthetolearnconcerningthatbusiness，andfoundbytrueinformationthathismenhadtakenviolentlysomecakesfromPicrochole\'speople，andthatMarquet\'sheadwasbrokenwithaslackyorshortcudgel；that，nevertheless，allwaswellpaid，andthatthesaidMarquethadfirsthurtForgierwithastrokeofhiswhipathwartthelegs。

Anditseemedgoodtohiswholecouncil，thatheshoulddefendhimselfwithallhismight。Notwithstandingallthis，saidGrangousier，seeingthequestionisbutaboutafewcakes，Iwilllabourtocontenthim；forIamveryunwillingtowagewaragainsthim。Heinquiredthenwhatquantityofcakestheyhadtakenaway，andunderstandingthatitwasbutsomefourorfivedozen，hecommandedfivecartloadsofthemtobebakedthatsamenight；andthatthereshouldbeonefullofcakesmadewithfinebutter，fineyolksofeggs，finesaffron，andfinespice，tobebestoweduponMarquet，untowhomlikewisehedirectedtobegivensevenhundredthousandandthreePhilips(thatis，atthreeshillingsthepiece，onehundredfivethousandpoundsandnineshillingsofEnglishmoney)，forreparationofhislossesandhindrances，andforsatisfactionofthechirurgeonthathaddressedhiswound；andfurthermoresettleduponhimandhisforeverinfreeholdtheapple-orchardcalledLaPomardiere。FortheconveyanceandpassingofallwhichwassentGallet，whobythewayastheywentmadethemgathernearthewillow-treesgreatstoreofboughs，canes，andreeds，wherewithallthecarrierswereenjoinedtogarnishanddecktheircarts，andeachofthemtocarryoneinhishand，ashimselflikewisedid，therebytogiveallmentounderstandthattheydemandedbutpeace，andthattheycametobuyit。

Beingcometothegate，theyrequiredtospeakwithPicrocholefromGrangousier。Picrocholewouldnotsomuchasletthemin，norgotospeakwiththem，butsentthemwordthathewasbusy，andthattheyshoulddelivertheirmindtoCaptainTouquedillon，whowasthenplantingapieceofordnanceuponthewall。Thensaidthegoodmanuntohim，Mylord，toeaseyouofallthislabour，andtotakeawayallexcuseswhyyoumaynotreturnuntoourformeralliance，wedoherepresentlyrestoreuntoyouthecakesuponwhichthequarrelarose。Fivedozendidourpeopletakeaway:

theywerewellpaidfor:welovepeacesowellthatwerestoreuntoyoufivecartloads，ofwhichthiscartshallbeforMarquet，whodothmostcomplain。Besides，tocontenthimentirely，herearesevenhundredthousandandthreePhilips，whichIdelivertohim，and，forthelosseshemaypretendtohavesustained，IresignforeverthefarmofthePomardiere，tobepossessedinfee-simplebyhimandhisforever，withoutthepaymentofanyduty，oracknowledgementofhomage，fealty，fine，orservicewhatsoever，andhereisthetenourofthedeed。And，forGod\'ssake，letuslivehenceforwardinpeace，andwithdrawyourselvesmerrilyintoyourowncountryfromwithinthisplace，untowhichyouhavenorightatall，asyourselvesmustneedsconfess，andletusbegoodfriendsasbefore。TouquedillonrelatedallthistoPicrochole，andmoreandmoreexasperatedhiscourage，sayingtohim，Theseclownsareafraidtosomepurpose。ByG——，Grangousierconskiteshimselfforfear，thepoordrinker。

Heisnotskilledinwarfare，norhathheanystomachforit。Heknowsbetterhowtoemptytheflagons，——thatishisart。Iamofopinionthatitisfitwesendbackthecartsandthemoney，and，forrest，thatveryspeedilywefortifyourselveshere，thenprosecuteourfortune。Butwhat！

Dotheythinktohavetodowithaninnywhoop，tofeedyouthuswithcakes？

Youmayseewhatitis。Thegoodusageandgreatfamiliaritywhichyouhavehadwiththemheretoforehathmadeyoucontemptibleintheireyes。

Anointavillain，hewillprickyou:prickavillain，andhewillanointyou(Ungentempungit，pungentemrusticusungit。)。

Sa，sa，sa，saidPicrochole，bySt。Jamesyouhavegivenatruecharacterofthem。OnethingIwilladviseyou，saidTouquedillon。Weareherebutbadlyvictualled，andfurnishedwithmouth-harnessveryslenderly。IfGrangousiershouldcometobesiegeus，Iwouldgopresently，andpluckoutofallyoursoldiers\'headsandmineownalltheteeth，exceptthreetoeachofus，andwiththemaloneweshouldmakeanendofourprovisionbuttoosoon。Weshallhave，saidPicrochole，buttoomuchsustenanceandfeeding-stuff。Camewehithertoeatortofight？Tofight，indeed，saidTouquedillon；yetfromthepaunchcomesthedance，andwherefaminerulesforceisexiled。Leaveoffyourprating，saidPicrochole，andforthwithseizeuponwhattheyhavebrought。Thentooktheymoneyandcakes，oxenandcarts，andsentthemawaywithoutspeakingoneword，onlythattheywouldcomenomoresonear，forareasonthattheywouldgivethemthemorrowafter。Thus，withoutdoinganything，returnedtheytoGrangousier，andrelatedthewholematteruntohim，subjoiningthattherewasnohopelefttodrawthemtopeacebutbysharpandfiercewars。

Chapter1。XXXIII。

HowsomestatesmenofPicrochole，byhairbrainedcounsel，puthiminextremedanger。

Thecartsbeingunloaded，andthemoneyandcakessecured，therecamebeforePicrocholetheDukeofSmalltrash，theEarlSwashbuckler，andCaptainDirt-tail(Menuail，Spadassin，Merdaille。)，whosaiduntohim，Sir，thisdaywemakeyouthehappiest，themostwarlikeandchivalrousprincethateverwassincethedeathofAlexanderofMacedonia。Becovered，becovered，saidPicrochole。Gramercy，saidthey，wedobutourduty。Themanneristhus。Youshallleavesomecaptainheretohavethechargeofthisgarrison，withapartycompetentforkeepingoftheplace，which，besidesitsnaturalstrength，ismadestrongerbytherampiersandfortressesofyourdevising。Yourarmyyouaretodivideintotwoparts，asyouknowverywellhowtodo。OnepartthereofshallfalluponGrangousierandhisforces。Byitshallhebeeasilyattheveryfirstshockrouted，andthenshallyougetmoneybyheaps，fortheclownhathstoreofreadycoin。Clownwecallhim，becauseanobleandgenerousprincehathneverapenny，andthattohoarduptreasureisbutaclownishtrick。Theotherpartofthearmy，inthemeantime，shalldrawtowardsOnys，Xaintonge，Angomois，andGascony。ThenmarchtoPerigot，Medoc，andElanes，takingwhereveryoucome，withoutresistance，towns，castles，andforts；afterwardstoBayonne，St。JohndeLuc，toFontarabia，whereyoushallseizeuponalltheships，andcoastingalongGaliciaandPortugal，shallpillageallthemaritimeplaces，evenuntoLisbon，whereyoushallbesuppliedwithallnecessariesbefittingaconqueror。Bycopsody，Spainwillyield，fortheyarebutaraceofloobies。ThenareyoutopassbytheStraitsofGibraltar，whereyoushallerecttwopillarsmorestatelythanthoseofHercules，totheperpetualmemoryofyourname，andthenarrowentrancethereshallbecalledthePicrocholinalsea。

HavingpassedthePicrocholinalsea，behold，Barbarossayieldshimselfyourslave。Iwill，saidPicrochole，givehimfairquarterandsparehislife。

Yea，saidthey，sothathebecontenttobechristened。AndyoushallconquerthekingdomsofTunis，ofHippo，Argier，Bomine(Bona)，Corone，yea，allBarbary。Furthermore，youshalltakeintoyourhandsMajorca，Minorca，Sardinia，Corsica，withtheotherislandsoftheLigusticandBalearianseas。Goingalongstonthelefthand，youshallruleallGalliaNarbonensis，Provence，theAllobrogians，Genoa，Florence，Lucca，andthenGodb\'w\'ye，Rome。(OurpoorMonsieurthePopediesnowforfear。)Bymyfaith，saidPicrochole，Iwillnotthenkisshispantoufle。

Italybeingthustaken，beholdNaples，Calabria，Apulia，andSicily，allransacked，andMaltatoo。IwishthepleasantKnightsoftheRhodesheretoforewouldbutcometoresistyou，thatwemightseetheirurine。I

would，saidPicrochole，verywillinglygotoLoretto。No，no，saidthey，thatshallbeatourreturn。Fromthencewewillsaileastwards，andtakeCandia，Cyprus，Rhodes，andtheCycladeIslands，andsetupon(the)Morea。

Itisours，bySt。Trenian。TheLordpreserveJerusalem；forthegreatSoldanisnotcomparabletoyouinpower。Iwillthen，saidhe，causeSolomon\'stempletobebuilt。No，saidthey，notyet，havealittlepatience，stayawhile，benevertoosuddeninyourenterprises。CanyoutellwhatOctavianAugustussaid？Festinalente。ItisrequisitethatyoufirsthavetheLesserAsia，Caria，Lycia，Pamphilia，Cilicia，Lydia，Phrygia，Mysia，Bithynia，Carazia，Satalia，Samagaria，Castamena，Luga，Savasta，evenuntoEuphrates。Shallwesee，saidPicrochole，BabylonandMountSinai？Thereisnoneed，saidthey，atthistime。Havewenothurriedupanddown，travelledandtoiledenough，inhavingtransfrettedandpassedovertheHircaniansea，marchedalongstthetwoArmeniasandthethreeArabias？Ay，bymyfaith，saidhe，wehaveplayedthefools，andareundone。Ha，poorsouls！What\'sthematter？saidthey。Whatshallwehave，saidhe，todrinkinthesedeserts？ForJulianAugustuswithhiswholearmydiedthereforthirst，astheysay。Wehavealready，saidthey，givenorderforthat。IntheSyriacseayouhaveninethousandandfourteengreatshipsladenwiththebestwinesintheworld。TheyarrivedatPortJoppa。Theretheyfoundtwo-and-twentythousandcamelsandsixteenhundredelephants，whichyoushallhavetakenatonehuntingaboutSigelmes，whenyouenteredintoLybia；and，besidesthis，youhadalltheMeccacaravan。Didnottheyfurnishyousufficientlywithwine？Yes，but，saidhe，wedidnotdrinkitfresh。Bythevirtue，saidthey，notofafish，avaliantman，aconqueror，whopretendsandaspirestothemonarchyoftheworld，cannotalwayshavehisease。GodbethankedthatyouandyourmenarecomesafeandsounduntothebanksoftheriverTigris。But，saidhe，whatdoththatpartofourarmyinthemeantimewhichoverthrowsthatunworthyswillpotGrangousier？Theyarenotidle，saidthey。Weshallmeetwiththemby-and-by。TheyshallhavewonyouBrittany，Normandy，Flanders，Hainault，Brabant，Artois，Holland，Zealand；theyhavepassedtheRhineoverthebelliesoftheSwitzersandlansquenets，andapartyofthesehathsubduedLuxembourg，Lorraine，Champagne，andSavoy，eventoLyons，inwhichplacetheyhavemetwithyourforcesreturningfromthenavalconquestsoftheMediterraneansea；andhaveralliedagaininBohemia，aftertheyhadplunderedandsackedSuevia，Wittemberg，Bavaria，Austria，Moravia，andStyria。ThentheysetfiercelytogetheruponLubeck，Norway，Swedeland，Rie，Denmark，Gitland，Greenland，theSterlins，evenuntothefrozensea。Thisdone，theyconqueredtheIslesofOrkneyandsubduedScotland，England，andIreland。FromthencesailingthroughthesandyseaandbytheSarmates，theyhavevanquishedandovercomePrussia，Poland，Lithuania，Russia，Wallachia，Transylvania，Hungary，Bulgaria，Turkeyland，andarenowatConstantinople。Come，saidPicrochole，letusgojoinwiththemquickly，forIwillbeEmperorofTrebizondalso。Shallwenotkillallthesedogs，TurksandMahometans？Whatadevilshouldwedoelse？saidthey。Andyoushallgivetheirgoodsandlandstosuchasshallhaveservedyouhonestly。Reason，saidhe，willhaveitso，thatisbutjust。IgiveuntoyoutheCaramania，Suria，andallthePalestine。

Ha，sir，saidthey，itisoutofyourgoodness；gramercy，wethankyou。

Godgrantyoumayalwaysprosper。Therewastherepresentatthattimeanoldgentlemanwellexperiencedinthewars，asternsoldier，andwhohadbeeninmanygreathazards，namedEchephron，who，hearingthisdiscourse，said，Idogreatlydoubtthatallthisenterprisewillbelikethetaleorinterludeofthepitcherfullofmilkwherewithashoemakermadehimselfrichinconceit；but，whenthepitcherwasbroken，hehadnotwhereupontodine。Whatdoyoupretendbytheselargeconquests？Whatshallbetheendofsomanylaboursandcrosses？Thusitshallbe，saidPicrochole，thatwhenwearereturnedweshallsitdown，rest，andbemerry。But，saidEchephron，ifbychanceyoushouldnevercomeback，forthevoyageislonganddangerous，wereitnotbetterforustotakeourrestnow，thanunnecessarilytoexposeourselvestosomanydangers？O，saidSwashbuckler，byG——，hereisagooddotard；come，letusgohideourselvesinthecornerofachimney，andtherespendthewholetimeofourlifeamongstladies，inthreadingofpearls，orspinning，likeSardanapalus。Hethatnothingventureshathneitherhorsenormule，saysSolomon。Hewhoadventurethtoomuch，saidEchephron，losethbothhorseandmule，answeredMalchon。Enough，saidPicrochole，goforward。IfearnothingbutthatthesedevilishlegionsofGrangousier，whilstweareinMesopotamia，willcomeonourbacksandchargeupourrear。Whatcourseshallwethentake？

Whatshallbeourremedy？Averygoodone，saidDirt-tail；aprettylittlecommission，whichyoumustsenduntotheMuscovites，shallbringyouintothefieldinaninstantfourhundredandfiftythousandchoicemenofwar。

Ohthatyouwouldbutmakemeyourlieutenant-general，Ishouldforthelightestfaultsofanyinflictgreatpunishments。Ifret，Icharge，I

strike，Itake，Ikill，Islay，Iplaythedevil。On，on，saidPicrochole，makehaste，mylads，andlethimthatlovesmefollowme。

Chapter1。XXXIV。

HowGargantualeftthecityofParistosuccourhiscountry，andhowGymnastencounteredwiththeenemy。

InthissameveryhourGargantua，whowasgoneoutofParisassoonashehadreadhisfather\'sletters，cominguponhisgreatmare，hadalreadypassedtheNunnery-bridge，himself，Ponocrates，Gymnast，andEudemon，whoallthree，thebettertoenablethemtogoalongwithhim，tookpost-

horses。Therestofhistraincameafterhimbyevenjourneysataslowerpace，bringingwiththemallhisbooksandphilosophicalinstruments。AssoonashehadalightedatParille，hewasinformedbyafarmerofGouguethowPicrocholehadfortifiedhimselfwithintherockClermond，andhadsentCaptainTripetwithagreatarmytosetuponthewoodofVedeandVaugaudry，andthattheyhadalreadyplunderedthewholecountry，notleavingcocknorhen，evenasfarastothewinepressofBillard。Thesestrangeandalmostincrediblenewsoftheenormousabusesthuscommittedoveralltheland，soaffrightedGargantuathatheknewnotwhattosaynordo。ButPonocratescounselledhimtogountotheLordofVauguyon，whoatalltimeshadbeentheirfriendandconfederate，andthatbyhimtheyshouldbebetteradvisedintheirbusiness。Whichtheydidincontinently，andfoundhimverywillingandfullyresolvedtoassistthem，andthereforewasofopinionthattheyshouldsendsomeoneofhiscompanytoscoutalonganddiscoverthecountry，tolearninwhatconditionandposturetheenemywas，thattheymighttakecounsel，andproceedaccordingtothepresentoccasion。Gymnastofferedhimselftogo。Whereuponitwasconcluded，thatforhissafetyandthebetterexpedition，heshouldhavewithhimsomeonethatknewtheways，avenues，turnings，windings，andriversthereabout。

ThenawaywentheandPrelingot，theequerryorgentlemanofVauguyon\'shorse，whoscoutedandespiedasnarrowlyastheycoulduponallquarterswithoutanyfear。InthemeantimeGargantuatookalittlerefreshment，atesomewhathimself，thelikedidthosewhowerewithhim，andcausedtogivetohismareapicotineofoats，thatis，threescoreandfourteenquartersandthreebushels。Gymnastandhiscomraderodesolong，thatatlasttheymetwiththeenemy\'sforces，allscatteredandoutoforder，plundering，stealing，robbing，andpillagingalltheycouldlaytheirhandson。And，asfaroffastheycouldperceivehim，theyranthronginguponthebackofoneanotherinallhastetowardshim，tounloadhimofhismoney，anduntrusshisportmantles。Thencriedheoutuntothem，Mymasters，Iamapoordevil，Idesireyoutospareme。Ihaveyetonecrownleft。Come，wemustdrinkit，foritisaurumpotabile，andthishorsehereshallbesoldtopaymywelcome。Afterwardstakemeforoneofyourown，forneveryetwasthereanymanthatknewbetterhowtotake，lard，roast，anddress，yea，byG——，totearasunderanddevourahen，thanIthatamhere:andformyproficiatIdrinktoallgoodfellows。Withthatheunscrewedhisborracho(whichwasagreatDutchleathernbottle)，andwithoutputtinginhisnosedrankveryhonestly。Themarouflerogueslookeduponhim，openingtheirthroatsafootwide，andputtingouttheirtongueslikegreyhounds，inhopestodrinkafterhim；butCaptainTripet，intheverynickofthattheirexpectation，camerunningtohimtoseewhoitwas。TohimGymnastofferedhisbottle，saying，Hold，captain，drinkboldlyandsparenot；I

havebeenthytaster，itiswineofLaFayeMonjau。What！saidTripet，thisfellowgibesandfloutsus？Whoartthou？saidTripet。Iam，saidGymnast，apoordevil(pauvrediable)。Ha，saidTripet，seeingthouartapoordevil，itisreasonthatthoushouldstbepermittedtogowhithersoeverthouwilt，forallpoordevilspasseverywherewithouttollortax。Butitisnotthecustomofpoordevilstobesowellmounted；

therefore，sirdevil，comedown，andletmehaveyourhorse，andifhedonotcarrymewell，you，masterdevil，mustdoit:forIlovealifethatsuchadevilasyoushouldcarrymeaway。

Chapter1。XXXV。

HowGymnastverysouplyandcunninglykilledCaptainTripetandothersofPicrochole\'smen。

Whentheyheardthesewords，someamongstthembegantobeafraid，andblessedthemselveswithbothhands，thinkingindeedthathehadbeenadevildisguised，insomuchthatoneofthem，namedGoodJohn，captainofthetrainedbandsofthecountrybumpkins，tookhispsalteroutofhiscodpiece，andcriedoutaloud，Hagioshotheos。IfthoubeofGod，speak；

ifthoubeoftheotherspirit，avoidhence，andgettheegoing。Yethewentnotaway。Whichwordsbeingheardbyallthesoldiersthatwerethere，diversofthembeingalittleinwardlyterrified，departedfromtheplace。AllthisdidGymnastverywellremarkandconsider，andthereforemakingasifhewouldhavealightedfromoffhishorse，ashewaspoisinghimselfonthemountingside，hemostnimbly，withhisshortswordbyhisthigh，shiftinghisfootinthestirrup，performedthestirrup-leatherfeat，whereby，aftertheincliningofhisbodydownwards，heforthwithlaunchedhimselfaloftintheair，andplacedbothhisfeettogetheronthesaddle，standinguprightwithhisbackturnedtowardsthehorse\'shead。

Now，saidhe，mycasegoesbackward。Thensuddenlyinthesameveryposturewhereinhewas，hefetchedagambolupononefoot，and，turningtothelefthand，failednottocarryhisbodyperfectlyround，justintoitsformerstance，withoutmissingonejot。Ha，saidTripet，Iwillnotdothatatthistime，andnotwithoutcause。Well，saidGymnast，Ihavefailed，Iwillundothisleap。Thenwithamarvellousstrengthandagility，turningtowardstherighthand，hefetchedanotherfriskinggambolasbefore，whichdone，hesethisright-handthumbuponthehind-bowofthesaddle，raisedhimselfup，andsprungintheair，poisingandupholdinghiswholebodyuponthemuscleandnerveofthesaidthumb，andsoturnedandwhirledhimselfaboutthreetimes。Atthefourth，reversinghisbody，andoverturningitupsidedown，andforesideback，withouttouchinganything，hebroughthimselfbetwixtthehorse\'stwoears，springingwithallhisbodyintotheair，uponthethumbofhislefthand，andinthatposture，turninglikeawindmill，didmostactivelydothattrickwhichiscalledthemiller\'spass。Afterthis，clappinghisrighthandflatuponthemiddleofthesaddle，hegavehimselfsuchajerkingswingthathetherebyseatedhimselfuponthecrupper，afterthemannerofgentlewomensittingonhorseback。Thisdone，heeasilypassedhisrightlegoverthesaddle，andplacedhimselflikeonethatridesincroup。But，saidhe，itwerebetterformetogetintothesaddle；thenputtingthethumbsofbothhandsuponthecrupperbeforehim，andthereuponleaninghimself，asupontheonlysupportersofhisbody，heincontinentlyturnedheelsoverheadintheair，andstraightfoundhimselfbetwixtthebowofthesaddleinagoodsettlement。Thenwithasomersaultspringingintotheairagain，hefelltostandwithbothhisfeetclosetogetheruponthesaddle，andtheremadeaboveahundredfrisks，turns，anddemipommads，withhisarmsheldoutacross，andinsodoingcriedoutaloud，Irage，Irage，devils，Iamstarkmad，devils，Iammad，holdme，devils，holdme，hold，devils，hold，hold！

Whilsthewasthusvaulting，theroguesingreatastonishmentsaidtooneanother，Bycock\'sdeath，heisagoblinoradevilthusdisguised。Abhostemalignoliberanos，Domine，andranawayinafullflight，asiftheyhadbeenrouted，lookingnowandthenbehindthem，likeadogthatcarriethawayagoose-winginhismouth。ThenGymnast，spyinghisadvantage，alightedfromhishorse，drewhissword，andlaidongreatblowsuponthethicksetandhighestcrestedamongthem，andoverthrewthemingreatheaps，hurt，wounded，andbruised，beingresistedbynobody，theythinkinghehadbeenastarveddevil，aswellinregardofhiswonderfulfeatsinvaulting，whichtheyhadseen，asforthetalkTripethadwithhim，callinghimpoordevil。OnlyTripetwouldhavetraitorouslyclefthisheadwithhishorseman\'ssword，orlance-knightfalchion；buthewaswellarmed，andfeltnothingoftheblowbuttheweightofthestroke。Whereupon，turningsuddenlyabout，hisgaveTripetahome-thrust，anduponthebackofthat，whilsthewasabouttowardhisheadfromaslash，heranhiminatthebreastwithahit，whichatoncecuthisstomach，thefifthgutcalledthecolon，andthehalfofhisliver，wherewithhefelltotheground，andinfallinggushedforthabovefourpottlesofpottage，andhissoulmingledwiththepottage。

Thisdone，Gymnastwithdrewhimself，verywiselyconsideringthatacaseofgreatadventureandhazardshouldnotbepursueduntoitsutmostperiod，andthatitbecomesallcavaliersmodestlytousetheirgoodfortune，withouttroublingorstretchingittoofar。Wherefore，gettingtohorse，hegavehimthespur，takingtherightwayuntoVauguyon，andPrelinguandwithhim。

Chapter1。XXXVI。

HowGargantuademolishedthecastleatthefordofVede，andhowtheypassedtheford。

Assoonashecame，herelatedtheestateandconditionwhereintheyhadfoundtheenemy，andthestratagemwhichhealonehadusedagainstalltheirmultitude，affirmingthattheywerebutrascallyrogues，plunderers，thieves，androbbers，ignorantofallmilitarydiscipline，andthattheymightboldlysetforwarduntothefield；itbeinganeasymattertofellandstrikethemdownlikebeasts。ThenGargantuamountedhisgreatmare，accompaniedaswehavesaidbefore，andfindinginhiswayahighandgreattree，whichcommonlywascalledbythenameofSt。Martin\'stree，becauseheretoforeSt。Martinplantedapilgrim\'sstaffthere，whichintractoftimegrewtothatheightandgreatness，said，ThisisthatwhichIlacked；

thistreeshallservemebothforastaffandlance。Withthathepulleditupeasily，pluckedofftheboughs，andtrimmeditathispleasure。Inthemeantimehismarepissedtoeaseherbelly，butitwasinsuchabundancethatitdidoverflowthecountrysevenleagues，andallthepissofthaturinalfloodranglibawaytowardsthefordofVede，wherewiththewaterwassoswollenthatalltheforcestheenemyhadtherewerewithgreathorrordrowned，exceptsomewhohadtakenthewayonthelefthandtowardsthehills。Gargantua，beingcometotheplaceofthewoodofVede，wasinformedbyEudemonthattherewassomeremainderoftheenemywithinthecastle，whichtoknow，Gargantuacriedoutasloudashewasable，Areyouthere，orareyounotthere？Ifyoubethere，betherenomore；andifyouarenotthere，Ihavenomoretosay。Butaruffiangunner，whosechargewastoattendtheportcullisoverthegate，letflyacannon-ballathim，andhithimwiththatshotmostfuriouslyontherighttempleofhishead，yetdidhimnomorehurtthanifhehadbutcastapruneorkernelofawine-grapeathim。Whatisthis？saidGargantua；doyouthrowatusgrape-kernelshere？Thevintageshallcostyoudear；thinkingindeedthatthebullethadbeenthekernelofagrape，orraisin-kernel。

Thosewhowerewithinthecastle，beingtillthenbusyatthepillage，whentheyheardthisnoiserantothetowersandfortresses，fromwhencetheyshotathimaboveninethousandandfive-and-twentyfalconshotandarquebusades，aimingallathishead，andsothickdidtheyshootathimthathecriedout，Ponocrates，myfriend，theseflieshereareliketoputoutmineeyes；givemeabranchofthosewillow-treestodrivethemaway，thinkingthatthebulletsandstonesshotoutofthegreatordnancehadbeenbutdunflies。Ponocrateslookedandsawthattherewerenootherfliesbutgreatshotwhichtheyhadshotfromthecastle。Thenwasitthatherushedwithhisgreattreeagainstthecastle，andwithmightyblowsoverthrewbothtowersandfortresses，andlaidalllevelwiththeground，bywhichmeansallthatwerewithinwereslainandbrokeninpieces。Goingfromthence，theycametothebridgeatthemill，wheretheyfoundallthefordcoveredwithdeadbodies，sothickthattheyhadchokedupthemillandstoppedthecurrentofitswater，andthesewerethosethatweredestroyedintheurinaldelugeofthemare。Theretheywereatastand，consultinghowtheymightpasswithouthindrancebythesedeadcarcasses。

ButGymnastsaid，Ifthedevilshavepassedthere，Iwillpasswellenough。

Thedevilshavepassedthere，saidEudemon，tocarryawaythedamnedsouls。

BySt。Treignan！saidPonocrates，thenbynecessaryconsequenceheshallpassthere。Yes，yes，saidGymnastes，orIshallstickintheway。Thensettingspurstohishorse，hepassedthroughfreely，hishorsenotfearingnorbeinganythingaffrightedatthesightofthedeadbodies；forhehadaccustomedhim，accordingtothedoctrineofAelian，nottofeararmour，northecarcassesofdeadmen；andthatnotbykillingmenasDiomedesdidtheThracians，orasUlyssesdidinthrowingthecorpsesofhisenemiesathishorse\'sfeet，asHomersaith，butbyputtingaJack-a-lentamongsthishay，andmakinghimgooveritordinarilywhenhegavehimhisoats。Theotherthreefollowedhimveryclose，exceptEudemononly，whosehorse\'sfore-rightorfarforefootsankuptothekneeinthepaunchofagreatfatchuffwholaythereuponhisbackdrowned，andcouldnotgetitout。Therewashepestered，untilGargantua，withtheendofhisstaff，thrustdowntherestofthevillain\'stripesintothewaterwhilstthehorsepulledouthisfoot；and，whichisawonderfulthinginhippiatry，thesaidhorsewasthoroughlycuredofaringbonewhichhehadinthatfootbythistouchoftheburstgutsofthatgreatlooby。

Chapter1。XXXVII。

HowGargantua，incombinghishead，madethegreatcannon-ballsfalloutofhishair。

BeingcomeoutoftheriverofVede，theycameveryshortlyaftertoGrangousier\'scastle，whowaitedforthemwithgreatlonging。Attheircomingtheywereentertainedwithmanycongees，andcherishedwithembraces。Neverwasseenamorejoyfulcompany，forSupplementumSupplementiChronicorumsaiththatGargamellediedtherewithjoy；formypart，trulyIcannottell，neitherdoIcareverymuchforher，norforanybodyelse。Thetruthwas，thatGargantua，inshiftinghisclothes，andcombinghisheadwithacomb，whichwasninehundredfootlongoftheJewishcanemeasure，andwhereoftheteethweregreattusksofelephants，wholeandentire，hemadefallateveryrakeabovesevenballsofbullets，atadozentheball，thatstuckinhishairattherazingofthecastleofthewoodofVede。WhichhisfatherGrangousierseeing，thoughttheyhadbeenlice，andsaiduntohim，What，mydearson，hastthoubroughtusthisfarsomeshort-wingedhawksofthecollegeofMontague？Ididnotmeanthatthoushouldstresidethere。ThenansweredPonocrates，Mysovereignlord，thinknotthatIhaveplacedhiminthatlousycollegewhichtheycallMontague；Ihadratherhaveputhimamongstthegrave-diggersofSanctInnocent，soenormousisthecrueltyandvillainythatIhaveknownthere:

forthegalley-slavesarefarbetterusedamongsttheMoorsandTartars，themurderersinthecriminaldungeons，yea，theverydogsinyourhouse，thanarethepoorwretchedstudentsintheaforesaidcollege。AndifI

wereKingofParis，thedeviltakemeifIwouldnotsetitonfire，andburnbothprincipalandregents，forsufferingthisinhumanitytobeexercisedbeforetheireyes。Then，takinguponeofthesebullets，hesaid，Thesearecannon-shot，whichyoursonGargantuahathlatelyreceivedbythetreacheryofyourenemies，ashewaspassingbeforethewoodofVede。

Buttheyhavebeensorewarded，thattheyarealldestroyedintheruinofthecastle，aswerethePhilistinesbythepolicyofSamson，andthosewhomthetowerofSilohimslew，asitiswritteninthethirteenthofLuke。Myopinionis，thatwepursuethemwhilsttheluckisonourside；foroccasionhathallherhaironherforehead；whensheispassed，youmaynotrecallher，——shehathnotuftwherebyyoucanlayholdonher，forsheisbaldinthehind-partofherhead，andneverreturnethagain。Truly，saidGrangousier，itshouldnotbeatthistime；forIwillmakeyouafeastthisnight，andbidyouwelcome。

Thissaid，theymadereadysupper，and，ofextraordinarybesideshisdailyfare，wereroastedsixteenoxen，threeheifers，twoandthirtycalves，threescoreandthreefatkids，fourscoreandfifteenwethers，threehundredfarrowpigsorsheatssousedinsweetwineormust，elevenscorepartridges，sevenhundredsnipesandwoodcocks，fourhundredLoudunandCornwallcapons，sixthousandpullets，andasmanypigeons，sixhundredcrammedhens，fourteenhundredleverets，oryoungharesandrabbits，threehundredandthreebuzzards，andonethousandandsevenhundredcockerels。

Forvenison，theycouldnotsosuddenlycomebyit，onlyelevenwildboars，whichtheAbbotofTurpenaysent，andeighteenfallowdeerwhichtheLordofGramountbestowed；togetherwithsevenscorepheasants，whichweresentbytheLordofEssars；andsomedozensofqueests，coushats，ringdoves，andwoodculvers；river-fowl，tealsandawteals，bitterns，courtes，plovers，francolins，briganders，tyrasons，younglapwings，tameducks，shovellers，woodlanders，herons，moorhens，criels，storks，canepetiers，oranges，flamans，whicharephaenicopters，orcrimson-wingedsea-fowls，terrigoles，turkeys，arbens，coots，solan-geese，curlews，termagants，andwater-

wagtails，withagreatdealofcream，curds，andfreshcheese，andstoreofsoup，pottages，andbrewiswithgreatvariety。Withoutdoubttherewasmeatenough，anditwashandsomelydressedbySnapsauce，Hotchpot，andBrayverjuice，Grangousier\'scooks。JenkinTrudgeapaceandCleanglasswereverycarefultofillthemdrink。