第5章

Thesceneofthatafternoonwasrepeatedthatevening，andonthethreeafternoonsandeveningsnextensuing。Onthefourth，thehostwasinhighspirits，forhehadsatisfiedhimselfthattherewasnogroundforthechargeagainstMr。Tupman。SowasMr。Tupman，forMr。Jinglehadtoldhimthathisaffairwouldsoonbebroughttoacrisis。SowasMr。Pickwick，forhewasseldomotherwise。SowasnotMr。Snodgrass，forhehadgrownjealousofMr。Tupman。Sowastheoldlady，forshehadbeenwinningatwhist。SowereMr。JingleandMissWardle，forreasonsofsufficientimportanceinthiseventfulhistorytobenarratedinanotherchapter。

[NextChapter][TableofContents]ThePickwickPapers：Chapter9[PreviousChapter][TableofContents]CHAPTERIXADISCOVERYANDACHASE

THEsupperwasreadylaid，thechairsweredrawnroundthetable，bottles，jugs，andglasseswerearrangedupontheside-board，andeverythingbetokenedtheapproachofthemostconvivialperiodinthewholefour-and-twentyhours。

Where’sRachael？saidMr。Wardle。

Ay，andJingle？addedMr。Pickwick。

Dearme，saidthehost，IwonderIhaven’tmissedhimbefore。Why，Idon’tthinkI’veheardhisvoicefortwohoursatleast。Emily，mydear，ringthebell。

Thebellwasrung，andthefatboyappeared。

Where’sMissRachael？Hecouldn’tsay。

Where’sMr。Jingle，then？Hedidn’tknow。

Everybodylookedsurprised。Itwaslate——pasteleveno’clock。Mr。Tupmanlaughedinhissleeve。Theywereloiteringsomewhere，talkingabouthim。

Ha，ha！capitalnotionthat——funny。

Nevermind，saidWardle，afterashortpause，they’llturnuppresently，Idaresay。Ineverwaitsupperforanybody。

Excellentrule，that，saidMr。Pickwick，admirable。

Pray，sitdown，saidthehost。

Certainly，saidMr。Pickwick：anddowntheysat。

Therewasagiganticroundofcoldbeefonthetable，andMr。Pickwickwassuppliedwithaplentifulportionofit。Hehadraisedhisforktohislips，andwasontheverypointofopeninghismouthforthereceptionofapieceofbeef，whenthehumofmanyvoicessuddenlyaroseinthekitchen。

Hepaused，andlaiddownhisfork。Mr。Wardlepausedtoo，andinsensiblyreleasedhisholdofthecarving-knife，whichremainedinsertedinthebeef。HelookedatMr。Pickwick，Mr。Pickwicklookedathim。

Heavyfootstepswereheardinthepassage。theparlourdoorwassuddenlyburstopen。andthemanwhohadcleanedMr。Pickwick’sbootsonhisfirstarrival，rushedintotheroom，followedbythefatboy，andallthedomestics。

Whatthedevil’sthemeaningofthis？exclaimedthehost。

Thekitchenchimneyain’ta-fire，isit，Emma？inquiredtheoldlady。

Lor’，grandma！No，screamedboththeyoungladies。

What’sthematter？roaredthemasterofthehouse。

Themangaspedforbreath，andfaintlyejaculated——

Theyha’gone，Mas’r！——gonerightcleanoff，sir！(AtthisjunctureMr。Tupmanwasobservedtolaydownhisknifeandfork，andtoturnverypale。)

Who’sgone？saidMr。Wardle，fiercely。

Mus’rJingleandMissRachael，inapo’-chay，fromBlueLion，Muggleton。

Iwasthere。butIcouldn’tstop’em。soIrunofftotell’ee。

Ipaidhisexpenses！saidMr。Tupman，jumpingupfrantically。He’sgottenpoundsofmine！——stophim！——he’sswindledme！——Iwon’tbearit！——I’llhavejustice，Pickwick！——Iwon’tstandit！andwithsundryincoherentexclamationsofthelikenature，theunhappygentlemanspunroundandroundtheapartment，inatransportoffrenzy。

Lordpreserveus！ejaculatedMr。Pickwick，eyeingtheextraordinarygesturesofhisfriendwithterrifiedsurprise。He’sgonemad！Whatshallwedo！

Do！saidthestoutoldhost，whoregardedonlythelastwordsofthesentence。Putthehorseinthegig！I’llgetachaiseattheLion，andfollow’eminstantly。Where——heexclaimed，asthemanranouttoexecutethecommission——Where’sthatvillain，Joe？

HereIam。butIhan’tawillin，repliedavoice。Itwasthefatboy’s。

Letmegetathim，Pickwick，criedWardle，asherushedattheill-starredyouth。Hewasbribedbythatscoundrel，Jingle，toputmeonawrongscent，bytellingacock-and-a-bullstoryofmysisterandyourfriendTupman！

(HereMr。Tupmansunkintoachair。)Letmegetathim！

Don’tlethim！screamedallthewomen，abovewhoseexclamationstheblubberingofthefatboywasdistinctlyaudible。

Iwon’tbeheld！criedtheoldman。Mr。Winkle，takeyourhandsoff。

Mr。Pickwick，letmego，sir！

Itwasabeautifulsight，inthatmomentofturmoilandconfusion，tobeholdtheplacidandphilosophicalexpressionofMr。Pickwick’sface，albeitsomewhatflushedwithexertion，ashestoodwithhisarmsfirmlyclaspedroundtheextensivewaistoftheircorpulenthost，thusrestrainingtheimpetuosityofhispassion，whilethefatboywasscratched，andpulled，andpushedfromtheroombyallthefemalescongregatedtherein。Hehadnosoonerreleasedhishold，thanthemanenteredtoannouncethatthegigwasready。

Don’tlethimgoalone！screamedthefemales。He’llkillsomebody！

I’llgowithhim，saidMr。Pickwick。

You’reagoodfellow，Pickwick，saidthehost，graspinghishand。

Emma，giveMr。Pickwickashawltotieroundhisneck——makehaste。Lookafteryourgrandmother，girls。shehasfaintedaway。Nowthen，areyouready？

Mr。Pickwick’smouthandchinhavingbeenhastilyenvelopedinalargeshawl：hishathavingbeenputonhishead，andhisgreatcoatthrownoverhisarm，herepliedintheaffirmative。

Theyjumpedintothegig。Giveherherhead，Tom，criedthehost。

andawaytheywent，downthenarrowlanes：joltinginandoutofthecart-ruts，andbumpingupagainstthehedgesoneitherside，asiftheywouldgotopieceseverymoment。

Howmucharetheya-head？shoutedWardle，astheydroveuptothedooroftheBlueLion，roundwhichalittlecrowdhadcollected，lateasitwas。

Notabovethree-quartersofanhour，waseverybody’sreply。

Chaiseandfourdirectly！——outwith’em！Putupthegigafterwards。

Now，boys！criedthelandlord——chaiseandfourout——makehaste——lookalivethere！

Awayranthehostlers，andtheboys。Thelanternsglimmered，asthemenrantoandfro。thehorses’hoofsclatteredontheunevenpavingoftheyard。thechaiserumbledasitwasdrawnoutofthecoach-house。andallwasnoiseandbustle。

Nowthen！——isthatchaisecomingoutto-night？criedWardle。

Comingdowntheyardnow，sir，repliedthehostler。

Outcamethechaise——inwentthehorses——onsprungtheboys——ingotthetravellers。

Mind——theseven-milestageinlessthanhalfanhour！shoutedWardle。

Offwithyou！

Theboysappliedwhipandspur，thewaitersshouted，thehostlerscheered，andawaytheywent，fastandfuriously。

Prettysituation，thoughtMr。Pickwick，whenhehadhadamoment’stimeforreflection。PrettysituationfortheGeneralChairmanofthePickwickClub。Dampchaise——strangehorses——fifteenmilesanhour——andtwelveo’clockatnight！

Forthefirstthreeorfourmiles，notawordwasspokenbyeitherofthegentlemen，eachbeingtoomuchimmersedinhisownreflectionstoaddressanyobservationstohiscompanion。Whentheyhadgoneoverthatmuchground，however，andthehorsesgettingthoroughlywarmedbegantodotheirworkinreallygoodstyle，Mr。Pickwickbecametoomuchexhilaratedwiththerapidityofthemotion，toremainanylongerperfectlymute。

We’resuretocatchthem，Ithink，saidhe。

Hopeso，repliedhiscompanion。

Finenight，saidMr。Pickwick，lookingupatthemoon，whichwasshiningbrightly。

Somuchtheworse，returnedWardle。forthey’llhavehadalltheadvantageofthemoonlighttogetthestartofus，andweshallloseit。

Itwillhavegonedowninanotherhour。

Itwillberatherunpleasantgoingatthisrateinthedark，won’tit？inquiredMr。Pickwick。

Idaresayitwill，repliedhisfrienddrily。

Mr。Pickwick’stemporaryexcitementbegantosoberdownalittle，ashereflectedupontheinconveniencesanddangersoftheexpeditioninwhichhehadsothoughtlesslyembarked。Hewasrousedbyaloudshoutingofthepost-boyontheleader。

Yo——yo——yo——yo——yoe，wentthefirstboy。

Yo——yo——yo——yoe！wentthesecond。

Yo——yo——yo——yoe！chimedinoldWardlehimself，mostlustily，withhisheadandhalfhisbodyoutofthecoachwindow。

Yo——yo——yo——yoe！shoutedMr。Pickwick，takinguptheburdenofthecry，thoughhehadnottheslightestnotionofitsmeaningorobject。Andamidsttheyo——yoingofthewholefour，thechaisestopped。

What’sthematter？inquiredMr。Pickwick。

There’sagatehere，repliedoldWardle。Weshallhearsomethingofthefugitives。

Afteralapseoffiveminutes，consumedinincessantknockingandshouting，anoldmaninhisshirtandtrousersemergedfromtheturnpike-house，andopenedthegate。

Howlongisitsinceapost-chaisewentthroughhere？inquiredMr。

Wardle。

Howlong？

Ah！

Why，Idon’trightlyknow。Itworn’talongtimeago，noritworn’tashorttimeago——justbetweenthetwo，perhaps。

Hasanychaisebeenbyatall？

Ohyes，there’sbeenashayby。

Howlongago，myfriend，interposedMr。Pickwick，anhour？

Ah，Idaresayitmightbe，repliedtheman。

Ortwohours？inquiredthepost-boyonthewheeler。

Well，Ishouldn’twonderifitwas，returnedtheoldmandoubtfully。

Driveon，boys，criedthetestyoldgentleman。don’twasteanymoretimewiththatoldidiot！

Idiot！exclaimedtheoldmanwithagrin，ashestoodinthemiddleoftheroadwiththegatehalf-closed，watchingthechaisewhichrapidlydiminishedintheincreasingdistance。No——notmucho’thateither。you’velosttenminuteshere，andgoneawayaswiseasyoucame，arterall。Ifeverymanonthelineashasaguineagivehim，earnsithalfaswell，youwon’tcatcht’othershaythissideMich’lmas，oldshort-and-fat。Andwithanotherprolongedgrin，theoldmanclosedthegate，re-enteredhishouse，andboltedthedoorafterhim。

Meanwhilethechaiseproceeded，withoutanyslackeningofpace，towardstheconclusionofthestage。Themoon，asWardlehadforetold，wasrapidlyonthewane。largetiersofdarkheavyclouds，whichhadbeengraduallyoverspreadingtheskyforsometimepast，nowformedoneblackmassoverhead。

andlargedropsofrainwhichpatteredeverynowandthenagainstthewindowsofthechaise，seemedtowarnthetravellersoftherapidapproachofastormynight。Thewind，too，whichwasdirectlyagainstthem，sweptinfuriousgustsdownthenarrowroad，andhowleddismallythroughthetreeswhichskirtedthepathway。Mr。Pickwickdrewhiscoatcloserabouthim，coiledhimselfmoresnuglyupintothecornerofthechaise，andfellintoasoundsleep，fromwhichhewasonlyawakenedbythestoppingofthevehicle，thesoundofthehostler’sbell，andaloudcryofHorsesondirectly！

Buthereanotherdelayoccurred。Theboysweresleepingwithsuchmysterioussoundness，thatittookfiveminutesa-piecetowakethem。Thehostlerhadsomehoworothermislaidthekeyofthestable，andevenwhenthatwasfound，twosleepyhelpersputthewrongharnessonthewronghorses，andthewholeprocessofharnessinghadtobegonethroughafresh。HadMr。Pickwickbeenalone，thesemultipliedobstacleswouldhavecompletelyputanendtothepursuitatonce，butoldWardlewasnottobesoeasilydaunted。andhelaidabouthimwithsuchheartygood-will，cuffingthisman，andpushingthat。strappingabucklehere，andtakinginalinkthere，thatthechaisewasreadyinamuchshortertimethancouldreasonablyhavebeenexpected，undersomanydifficulties。

Theyresumedtheirjourney。andcertainlytheprospectbeforethemwasbynomeansencouraging。Thestagewasfifteenmileslong，thenightwasdark，thewindhigh，andtherainpouringintorrents。Itwasimpossibletomakeanygreatwayagainstsuchobstaclesunited：itwashardupononeo’clockalready。andnearlytwohourswereconsumedingettingtotheendofthestage。Here，however，anobjectpresenteditself，whichrekindledtheirhopes，andre-animatedtheirdroppingspirits。

Whendidthischaisecomein？criedoldWardle，leapingoutofhisownvehicle，andpointingtoonecoveredwithwetmud，whichwasstandingintheyard。

Notaquarterofanhourago，sir。repliedthehostler，towhomthequestionwasaddressed。

Ladyandgentleman？inquiredWardle，almostbreathlesswithimpatience。

Yes，sir。

Tallgentleman——dresscoat——longlegs——thinbody？

Yes，sir。

Elderlylady——thinface——ratherskinny——eh？

Yes，sir。

Byheavens，it’sthecouple，Pickwick，exclaimedtheoldgentleman。

Wouldhavebeenherebefore，saidthehostler，buttheybrokeatrace。

Itis！saidWardle，itisbyJove！Chaiseandfourinstantly！Weshallcatchthemyet，beforetheyreachthenextstage。Aguineaa-piece，boys——bealivethere——bustleabout——there’sgoodfellows。

Andwithsuchadmonitionsasthese，theoldgentlemanranupanddowntheyard，andbustledtoandfro，inastateofexcitementwhichcommunicateditselftoMr。Pickwickalso。andundertheinfluenceofwhich，thatgentlemangothimselfintocomplicatedentanglementswithharness，andmixedupwithhorsesandwheelsofchaises，inthemostsurprisingmanner，firmlybelievingthatbysodoinghewasmateriallyforwardingthepreparationsfortheirresumingtheirjourney。

Jumpin——jumpin！criedoldWardle，climbingintothechaise，pullingupthesteps，andslammingthedoorafterhim。Comealong！Makehaste！

AndbeforeMr。Pickwickknewpreciselywhathewasabout，hefelthimselfforcedinattheotherdoor，byonepullfromtheoldgentleman，andonepushfromthehostler。andofftheywereagain。

Ah！wearemovingnow，saidtheoldgentlemanexultingly。Theywereindeed，aswassufficientlytestifiedtoMr。Pickwick，byhisconstantcollisionseitherwiththehardwood-workofthechaise，orthebodyofhiscompanion。

Holdup！saidthestoutoldMr。Wardle，asMr。Pickwickdivedheadforemostintohiscapaciouswaistcoat。

Ineverdidfeelsuchajoltinginmylife，saidMr。Pickwick。

Nevermind，repliedhiscompanion，itwillsoonbeover。Steady，steady。

Mr。Pickwickplantedhimselfintohisowncorner，asfirmlyashecould。

andonwhirledthechaisefasterthanever。

Theyhadtravelledinthiswayaboutthreemiles，whenMr。Wardle，whohadbeenlookingoutofthewindow，fortwoorthreeminutes，suddenlydrewinhisface，coveredwithsplashes，andexclaimedinbreathlesseagerness——

Heretheyare！

Mr。Pickwickthrusthisheadoutofhiswindow。Yes：therewasachaiseandfour，ashortdistancebeforethem，dashingalongatfullgallop。

Goon，goon，almostshriekedtheoldgentleman。Twoguineasa-piece，boys——don’tlet’emgainonus——keepitup——keepitup。

Thehorsesinthefirstchaisestartedonattheirutmostspeed。andthoseinMr。Wardle’sgallopedfuriouslybehindthem。

Iseehishead，exclaimedthecholericoldman。Damme，Iseehishead。

SodoI，saidMr。Pickwick，that’she。

Mr。Pickwickwasnotmistaken。ThecountenanceofMr。Jingle，completelycoatedwiththemudthrownupbythewheels，wasplainlydiscernibleatthewindowofhischaise。andthemotionofhisarm，whichhewaswavingviolentlytowardsthepostillions，denotedthathewasencouragingthemtoincreasedexertion。

Theinterestwasintense。Fields，trees，andhedges，seemedtorushpastthemwiththevelocityofawhirlwind，sorapidwasthepaceatwhichtheytorealong。Theywereclosebythesideofthefirstchaise。Jingle’svoicecouldbeplainlyheard，evenabovethedinofthewheels，urgingontheboys。OldMr。Wardlefoamedwithrageandexcitement。Heroaredoutscoundrelsandvillainsbythedozen，clenchedhisfirstandshookitexpressivelyattheobjectofhisindignation。butMr。Jingleonlyansweredwithacontemptuoussmile，andrepliedtohismenacesbyashoutoftriumph，ashishorses，answeringtheincreasedapplicationofwhipandspur，brokeintoafastergallop，andleftthepursuersbehind。

Mr。Pickwickhadjustdrawninhishead，andMr。Wardle，exhaustedwithshouting，haddonethesame，whenatremendousjoltthrewthemforwardagainstthefrontofthevehicle。Therewasasuddenbump——aloudcrash——awayrolledawheel，andoverwentthechaise。

Afteraveryfewsecondsofbewildermentandconfusion，inwhichnothingbuttheplungingofhorsesandbreakingofglasscouldbemadeout，Mr。

Pickwickfelthimselfviolentlypulledoutfromamongtheruinsofthechaise。andassoonashehadgainedhisfeet，andextricatedhisheadfromtheskirtsofhisgreatcoat，whichmateriallyimpededtheusefulnessofhisspectacles，thefulldisasterofthecasemethisview。

OldMr。Wardlewithoutahat，andhisclothestorninseveralplaces，stoodbyhisside，andthefragmentsofthechaiselayscatteredattheirfeet。Thepost-boys，whohadsucceededincuttingthetraces，werestanding，disfiguredwithmudanddisorderedbyhardriding，bythehorses’heads。

Aboutahundredyardsinadvancewastheotherchaise，whichhadpulleduponhearingthecrash。Thepostillions，eachwithabroadgrinconvulsinghiscountenance，wereviewingtheadversepartyfromtheirsaddles，andMr。Jinglewascontemplatingthewreckfromthecoach-window，withevidentsatisfaction。Thedaywasjustbreaking，andthewholescenewasrenderedperfectlyvisiblebythegreylightofthemorning。

Hallow！shoutedtheshamelessJingle，anybodydamaged？——elderlygentlemen——nolightweights——dangerouswork——very。

You’rearascal！roaredWardle。

Ha！ha！repliedJingle。andthenheadded，withaknowingwink，andajerkofthethumbtowardstheinteriorofthechaise——Isay——she’sverywell——desireshercompliments——begsyouwon’ttroubleyourself——lovetoTuppy——won’tyougetupbehind？——driveon，boys。

Thepostillionsresumedtheirproperattitudes，andawayrattledthechaise，Mr。Jingleflutteringinderisionawhitehandkerchieffromthecoach-window。

Nothinginthewholeadventure，noteventheupset，haddisturbedthecalmandequablecurrentofMr。Pickwick’stemper。Thevillainy，however，whichcouldfirstborrowmoneyofhisfaithfulfollower，andthenabbreviatehisnametoTuppywasmorethanhecouldpatientlybear。Hedrewhisbreathhard，andcoloureduptotheverytipsofhisspectacles，ashesaid，slowlyandemphatically——

IfeverImeetthatmanagain，I’ll——

Yes，yes，interruptedWardle，that’sallverywell：butwhilewestandtalkinghere，they’llgettheirlicence，andbemarriedinLondon。

Mr。Pickwickpaused，bottleduphisvengeance，andcorkeditdown。

Howfarisittothenextstage？inquiredMr。Wardle，ofoneoftheboys。

Sixmile，ain’tit，Tom？

Raytherbetter。

Raytherbetternorsixmile，sir。

Can’tbehelped，saidWardle，wemustwalkit，Pickwick。

Nohelpforit，repliedthattrulygreatman。

Sosendingforwardoneoftheboysonhorseback，toprocureafreshchaiseandhorses，andleavingtheotherbehindtotakecareofthebrokenone，Mr。PickwickandMr。Wardlesetmanfullyforwardonthewalk，firsttyingtheirshawlsroundtheirnecks，andslouchingdowntheirhatstoescapeasmuchaspossiblefromthedelugeofrain，whichafteraslightcessationhadagainbeguntopourheavilydown。

[NextChapter][TableofContents]ThePickwickPapers：Chapter10[PreviousChapter][TableofContents]CHAPTERXCLEARINGUPALLDOUBTS(IFANYEXISTED)OFTHEDISINTERESTEDNESS

OFMR。JINGLE’SCHARACTER

THEREareinLondonseveraloldinns，oncethehead-quartersofcelebratedcoachesinthedayswhencoachesperformedtheirjourneysinagraverandmoresolemnmannerthantheydointhesetimes。butwhichhavenowdegeneratedintolittlemorethantheabidingandbookingplacesofcountrywaggons。Thereaderwouldlookinvainforanyoftheseancienthostelries，amongtheGoldenCrossesandBullandMouths，whichreartheirstatelyfrontsintheimprovedstreetsofLondon。

Ifhewouldlightuponanyoftheseoldplaces，hemustdirecthisstepstotheobscurerquartersofthetown。andthereinsomesecludednookshewillfindseveral，stillstandingwithakindofgloomysturdiness，amidstthemoderninnovationswhichsurroundthem。

IntheBoroughespecially，therestillremainsomehalfdozenoldinns，whichhavepreservedtheirexternalfeaturesunchanged，andwhichhaveescapedaliketherageforpublicimprovement，andtheencroachmentsofprivatespeculation。Great，rambling，queer，oldplacestheyare，withgalleries，andpassages，andstaircases，wideenoughandantiquatedenoughtofurnishmaterialsforahundredghoststories，supposingweshouldeverbereducedtothelamentablenecessityofinventingany，andthattheworldshouldexistlongenoughtoexhausttheinnumerableveraciouslegendsconnectedwitholdLondonBridge，anditsadjacentneighbourhoodontheSurreyside。

Itwasintheyardofoneoftheseinns——ofnolesscelebratedaonethantheWhiteHart——thatamanwasbusilyemployedinbrushingthedirtoffapairofboots，earlyonthemorningsucceedingtheeventsnarratedinthelastchapter。Hewashabitedinacoarse-stripedwaistcoat，withblackcalicosleeves，andblueglassbuttons。drabbreechesandleggings。

Abrightredhandkerchiefwaswoundinaverylooseandunstudiedstyleroundhisneck，andanoldwhitehatwascarelesslythrownononesideofhishead。Thereweretworowsofbootsbeforehim，onecleanedandtheotherdirty，andateveryadditionhemadetothecleanrow，hepausedfromhiswork，andcontemplateditsresultswithevidentsatisfaction。

Theyardpresentednoneofthatbustleandactivitywhicharetheusualcharacteristicsofalargecoachinn。Threeorfourlumberingwaggons，eachwithapileofgoodsbeneathitsamplecanopy，abouttheheightofthesecond-floorwindowofanordinaryhouse，werestowedawaybeneathaloftyroofwhichextendedoveroneendoftheyard：andanother，whichwasprobablytocommenceitsjourneythatmorning，wasdrawnoutintotheopenspace。Adoubletierofbedroomgalleries，witholdclumsybalustrades，ranroundtwosidesofthestragglingarea，andadoublerowofbellstocorrespond，shelteredfromtheweatherbyalittleslopingroof，hungoverthedoorleadingtothebarandcoffee-room。Twoorthreegigsandchaise-cartswerewheeledupunderdifferentlittleshedsandpent-houses。andtheoccasionalheavytreadofacart-horse，orrattlingofachainatthefurtherendoftheyard，announcedtoanybodywhocaredaboutthematter，thatthestablelayinthatdirection。Whenweaddthatafewboysinsmockfrockswerelyingasleeponheavypackages，woolpacks，andotherarticlesthatwerescatteredaboutonheapsofstraw，wehavedescribedasfullyasneedbethegeneralappearanceoftheyardoftheWhiteHartInn，HighStreet，Borough，ontheparticularmorninginquestion。

Aloudringingofoneofthebells，wasfollowedbytheappearanceofasmartchambermaidintheuppersleepinggallery，who，aftertappingatoneofthedoors，andreceivingarequestfromwithin，calledoverthebalustrades——

Sam！

Hallo，repliedthemanwiththewhitehat。

Numbertwenty-twowantshisboots。

Asknumbertwenty-two，wetherhe’llhave’emnow，orwaittillhegets’em，wasthereply。

Come，don’tbeafool，Sam，saidthegirl，coaxingly，thegentlemanwantshisbootsdirectly。

Well，youareaniceyoung’oomanforamusicalparty，youare，

saidtheboot-cleaner。Lookatthesehereboots——elevenpairo’boots。

andoneshoeasb’longstonumbersix，withthewoodenleg。Theelevenbootsistobecalledathalf-pasteightandtheshoeatnine。Who’snumbertwenty-two，that’stoputalltheothersout？No，no。reg’larrotation，asJackKetchsaid，wenhetiedthemenup。Sorrytokeepyouawaitin’，sir，butI’llattendtoyoudirectly。

Sayingwhich，themaninthewhitehatsettoworkuponatop-bootwithincreasedassiduity。

Therewasanotherloudring。andthebustlingoldlandladyoftheWhiteHartmadeherappearanceintheoppositegallery。

Sam，criedthelandlady，where’sthatlazy，idle——why，Sam——oh，thereyouare。whydon’tyouanswer？

Wouldn’tbegen-teeltoanswer，’tillyou’ddonetalking，repliedSam，gruffly。

Here，cleanthemshoesfornumberseventeendirectly，andtake’emtoprivatesitting-room，numberfive，firstfloor。

Thelandladyflungapairoflady’sshoesintotheyard，andbustledaway。

Number5，saidSam，ashepickeduptheshoes，andtakingapieceofchalkfromhispocket，madeamemorandumoftheirdestinationonthesoles——Lady’sshoesandprivatesittin’-room！Isupposeshedidn’tcomeinthewaggin。

Shecameinearlythismorning，criedthegirl，whowasstillleaningovertherailingofthegallery，withagentlemaninahackney-coach，andit’shimaswantshisboots，andyou’dbetterdo’em，that’sallaboutit。

Vydidn’tyousaysobefore？saidSam，withgreatindignation，singlingoutthebootsinquestionfromtheheapbeforehim。ForallIknow’dhevasoneo’theregularthree-pennies。Privateroom！andaladytoo！Ifhe’sanythingofagen’lm’n，he’svorthashillin’aday，letalonethearrands。

Stimulatedbythisinspiringreflection，Mr。Samuelbrushedawaywithsuchheartygoodwill，thatinafewminutesthebootsandshoes，withapolishwhichwouldhavestruckenvytothesouloftheamiableMr。Warren(fortheyusedDayandMartinattheWhiteHart)，hadarrivedatthedoorofnumberfive。

Comein，saidaman’svoice，inreplytoSam’srapatthedoor。

Sammadehisbestbow，andsteppedintothepresenceofaladyandgentlemanseatedatbreakfast。Havingofficiouslydepositedthegentleman’sbootsrightandleftathisfeet，andthelady’sshoesrightandleftathers，hebackedtowardsthedoor。

Boots，saidthegentleman。

Sir，saidSam，closingthedoor，andkeepinghishandontheknobofthelock。

Doyouknow——what’sa-name——Doctors’Commons？

Yes，sir。

Whereisit？

Paul’sChurch-yard，sir。lowarchwayonthecarriageside，bookseller’satonecorner，hot-elontheother，andtwoportersinthemiddleastoutsforlicences。

Toutsforlicences！saidthegentleman。

Toutsforlicences，repliedSam。Twocovesinvhiteaprons——touchestheirhatswenyouwalkin——`Licence，sir，licence？’Queersort，them，andtheirmas’rstoo，sir——OldBailyProctors——andnomistake。

Whatdotheydo？inquiredthegentleman。

Do！You，sir！Thata’ntthewostonit，neither。Theyputsthingsintooldgen’lm’n’sheadsastheyneverdreamedof。Myfather，sir，wosacoachman。Awidowerhewos，andfatenoughforanything——uncommonfat，tobesure。Hismissusdies，andleaveshimfourhundredpound。DownhegoestotheCommons，toseethelawyeranddrawtheblunt——werysmart——top-bootson——nosegayinhisbutton-hole——broad-brimmedtile——greenshawl——quitethegen’lm’n。Goesthroughthearchvay，thinkinghowheshouldinwestthemoney——upcomesthetouter，toucheshishat——`Licence，sir，licence？’——`What’sthat？’saysmyfather——`Licence，sir，’sayshe——`Whatlicence？’saysmyfather——`Marriagelicence，’saysthetouter——`Dashmyveskit，’saysmyfather，`Ineverthoughto’that。’——`Ithinkyouwantsone，sir，’saysthetouter。Myfatherpullsup，andthinksabit——`No，’sayshe，`damme，I’mtooold，b’sidesI’mamanysizestoolarge，’sayshe——`Notabitonit，sir，’saysthetouter——`Thinknot？’saysmyfather——`I’msurenot，’sayshe。`wemarriedagen’lm’ntwiceyoursize，lastMonday。’——`Didyou，though，’saidmyfather——`Tobesurewedid，’saysthetouter，`you’reababbytohim——thisway，sir——thisway！’——andsureenoughmyfatherwalksarterhim，likeatamemonkeybehindahorgan，intoalittlebackoffice，vereafellersatamongdirtypapersandtinboxes，makingbelievehewasbusy。`Praytakeaseat，vileImakesouttheaffidavit，sir，’saysthelawyer。`Thank’ee，sir，’saysmayfather，anddownhesat，andstaredwithallhiseyes，andhismouthvideopen，atthenamesontheboxes。`What’syourname，sir，’saysthelawyer——`TonyWeller，’saysmyfather——`Parish？’

saysthelawyer——`BelleSavage，’saysmyfather。forhestoppedtherewenhedroveup，andheknow’dnothingaboutparishes，hedidn’t——`Andwhat’sthelady’sname？’saysthelawyer。Myfatherwasstruckallofaheap。`BlessedifIknow，’sayshe——`Notknow！’saysthelawyer——`Nomorenoryoudo，’saysmyfather，`can’tIputthatinarterwards？’——`Impossible！’

saysthelawyer——`Werywell，’saysmyfather，afterhe’dthoughtamoment，`putdownMrs。Clarke。’——`WhatClarke？’saysthelawyer，dippinghispenintheink——`SusanClarke，Markiso’Granby，Dorking，’saysmyfather。

`she’llhaveme，ifIask，Ides-say——Ineversaidnothingtoher，butshe’llhaveme，Iknow。’Thelicencewasmadeout，andshedidhavehim，andwhat’smoreshe’sgothimnow。andIneverhadanyofthefourhundredpound，worseluck。Begyourpardon，sir，saidSam，whenhehadconcluded，butwenIgetsonthisheregrievance，Irunsonlikeanewbarrowviththewheelgreased。Havingsaidwhich，andhavingpausedforaninstanttoseewhetherhewaswantedforanythingmore，Samlefttheroom。

Half-pastnine——justthetime——offatonce。saidthegentleman，whomweneedhardlyintroduceasMr。Jingle。

Time——forwhat？saidthespinsteraunt，coquettishly。

Licence，dearestofangles——givenoticeatthechurch——callyoumine，to-morrow——saidMr。Jingle，andhesqueezedthespinsteraunt’shand。

Thelicence！saidRachael，blushing。

Thelicence，repeatedMr。Jingle——Inhurry，post-hasteforalicence，Inhurry，dingdongIcomeback。

Howyourunon，saidRachael。

Runon——nothingtothehours，days，weeks，months，years，whenwe’reunited——runon——they’llflyon——volt——mizzle——steam-engine——thousand-horsepower——nothingtoit。

Can’t——can’twebemarriedbeforeto-morrowmorning？inquiredRachael。

Impossible——can’tbe——noticeatthechurch——leavethelicenceto-day——ceremonycomeoffto-morrow。

Iamsoterrified，lestmybrothershoulddiscoverus！saidRachael。

Discover——nonsense——toomuchshakenbythebreakdown——besides——extremecaution——gaveupthepost-chaise——walkedon——tookahackneycoach——cametotheBorough——lastplaceintheworldthathe’dlookin——ha！ha！——capitalnotionthat——very。

Don’tbelong，saidthespinster，affectionately，asMr。Jinglestuckthepinched-uphatonhishead。

Longawayfromyou？——Cruelcharmer，andMr。Jingleskippedplayfullyuptothespinsteraunt，imprintedachastekissuponherlips，anddancedoutoftheroom。

Dearman！saidthespinsterasthedoorclosedafterhim。

Rumoldgirl，saidMr。Jingle，ashewalkeddownthepassage。

Itispainfultoreflectupontheperfidyofourspecies。andwewillnot，therefore，pursuethethreadofMr。Jingle’smeditations，ashewendedhiswaytoDoctors’Commons。Itwillbesufficientforourpurposetorelate，thatescapingthesnaresofthedragonsinwhiteaprons，whoguardtheentrancetothatenchantedregion，hereachedtheVicarGeneral’sofficeinsafety，andhavingprocuredahighlyflatteringaddressonparchment，fromtheArchbishopofCanterbury，tohistrustyandwell-belovedAlfredJingleandRachaelWardle，greeting，hecarefullydepositedthemysticdocumentinhispocket，andretracedhisstepsintriumphtotheBorough。

HewasyetonhiswaytotheWhiteHart，whentwoplumpgentlemenandonethinoneenteredtheyard，andlookedroundinsearchofsomeauthorisedpersonofwhomtheycouldmakeafewinquiries。Mr。SamuelWellerhappenedtobeatthatmomentengagedinburnishingapairofpaintedtops，thepersonalpropertyofafarmerwhowasrefreshinghimselfwithaslightlunchoftwoorthreepoundsofcoldbeefandapotortwoofporter，afterthefatiguesoftheBoroughmarket。andtohimthethingentlemenstraightwayadvanced。

Myfriend，saidthethingentleman。

You’reoneo’theadwicegratisorder，thoughtSam，oryouwouldn’tbesowerryfondo’meallatonce。Butheonlysaid——Well，sir。

Myfriend，saidthethingentleman，withaconciliatoryhem——Haveyougotmanypeoplestoppinghere，now？Prettybusy。Eh？

Samstolealookattheinquirer。Hewasalittlehighdriedman，withadarksqueezed-upface，andsmallrestlessblackeyes，thatkeptwinkingandtwinklingoneachsideofhislittleinquisitivenose，asiftheywereplayingaperpetualgameofpeep-bowiththatfeature。Hewasdressedallinblack，withbootsasshinyashiseyes，alowwhiteneckcloth，andacleanshirtwithafrilltoit。Agoldwatch-chain，andseals，dependedfromhisfob。Hecarriedhisblackkidglovesinhishands，notonthem。andashespoke，thrusthiswristsbeneathhiscoat-tails，withtheairofamanwhowasinthehabitofpropoundingsomeregularposers。

Prettybusy，eh？saidthelittleman。

Oh，werrywell，sir，repliedSam，weshan’tbebankrupts，andweshan’tmakeourfort’ns。Weeatsourbiledmuttonwithoutcapers，anddon’tcareforhorse-radishwenvecangetbeef。

Ah，saidthelittleman，you’reawag，a’ntyou？

Myeldestbrotherwastroubledwiththatcomplaint，saidSam。itmaybecatching——Iusedtosleepwithhim。

Thisisacuriousoldhouseofyours，saidthelittleman，lookingroundhim。

Ifyou’dsentwordyouwasacoming，we’dha’haditrepaired。repliedtheimperturbableSam。

Thelittlemanseemedratherbaffledbytheseseveralrepulses，andashortconsultationtookplacebetweenhimandthetwoplumpgentlemen。

Atitsconclusion，thelittlemantookapinchofsnufffromanoblongsilverbox，andwasapparentlyonthepointofrenewingtheconversation，whenoneoftheplumpgentlemen，whoinadditiontoabenevolentcountenance，possessedapairofspectacles，andapairofblackgaiters，interfered——

Thefactofthematteris，saidthebenevolentgentleman，thatmyfriendhere(pointingtotheotherplumpgentleman)willgiveyouhalfaguinea，ifyou’llansweroneortwo——

Now，mydearsir——mydearsir，saidthelittleman，pray，allowme——mydearsir，theveryfirstprincipletobeobservedinthesecases，isthis：

ifyouplaceamatterinthehandsofaprofessionalman，youmustinnowayinterfereintheprogressofthebusiness。youmustreposeimplicitconfidenceinhim。Really，Mr。(heturnedtotheotherplumpgentleman，andsaid)——Iforgetyourfriend’sname。

Pickwick，saidMr。Wardle，foritwasnootherthanthatjollypersonage。

Ah，Pickwick——reallyMr。Pickwick，mydearsir，excuseme——Ishallbehappytoreceiveanyprivatesuggestionsofyours，asamicuscuriae，butyoumustseetheimproprietyofyourinterferingwithmyconductinthiscase，withsuchanadcaptandumargumentastheofferofhalfaguinea。Really，mydearsir，really。andthelittlemantookanargumentativepinchofsnuff，andlookedveryprofound。

Myonlywish，sir，saidMr。Pickwick，wastobringthisveryunpleasantmattertoasspeedyacloseaspossible。

Quiteright——quiteright，saidthelittleman。

Withwhichview，continuedMr。Pickwick，Imadeuseoftheargumentwhichmyexperienceofmenhastaughtmeisthemostlikelytosucceedinanycase。

Ay，ay，saidthelittleman，verygood，verygood，indeed。butyoushouldhavesuggestedittome。Mydearsir，I’mquitecertainyoucannotbeignorantoftheextentofconfidencewhichmustbeplacedinprofessionalmen。Ifanyauthoritycanbenecessaryonsuchapoint，mydearsir，letmereferyoutothewell-knowncaseinBarnwelland——

NevermindGeorgeBarnwell，interruptedSam，whohadremainedawonderinglistenerduringthisshortcolloquy。everybodyknowsvhatsortofacasehiswas，tho’it’salwaysbeenmyopinion，mindyou，thattheyoung’oomandeservedscraggingaprecioussightmorethanhedid。Hows’ever，that’sneitherherenorthere。Youwantmetoexceptofhalfaguinea。Werrywell，I’magreeable：Ican’tsaynofairerthanthat，canI，sir？(Mr。Pickwicksmiled。)Thenthenextquestionis，whatthedevildoyouwantwithme，asthemansaidwenheseetheghost？

Wewanttoknow——saidMr。Wardle。

Now，mydearsir——mydearsir，interposedthebusylittleman。

Mr。Wardleshruggedhisshoulders，andwassilent。

Wewanttoknow，saidthelittleman，solemnly。andweaskthequestionofyou，inorderthatwemaynotawakenapprehensionsinside——wewanttoknowwhoyou’vegotinthishouse，atpresent？

Whothereisinthehouse！saidSam，inwhosemindtheinmateswerealwaysrepresentedbythatparticulararticleoftheircostume，whichcameunderhisimmediatesuperintendence。There’sawoodenleginnumbersix。

there’sapairofHessiansinthirteen。there’stwopairofhalvesinthecommercial。there’stheseherepaintedtopsinthesnuggeryinsidethebar。andfivemoretopsinthecoffee-room。

Nothingmore？saidthelittleman。

Stopabit，repliedSam，suddenlyrecollectinghimself。Yes。there’sapairo’Wellingtonsagooddealworn，andapairoflady’sshoes，innumberfive。

Whatsortofshoes？hastilyinquiredWardle，who，togetherwithMr。

Pickwick，hadbeenlostinbewildermentatthesingularcatalogueofvisitors。

Countrymake，repliedSam。

Anymaker’sname？

Brown。

Whereof？

Muggleton。

Itisthem，exclaimedWardle。ByHeavens，we’vefoundthem。

Hush！saidSam。TheWellingtonshasgonetoDoctors’Commons。

No，saidthelittleman。

Yes，foralicence。

We’reintime，exclaimedWardle。Showustheroom。notamomentistobelost。

Pray，mydearsir——pray，saidthelittleman。caution，caution。

Hedrewfromhispocketaredsilkpurse，andlookedveryhardatSamashedrewoutasovereign。

Samgrinnedexpressively。

Showusintotheroomatonce，withoutannouncingus，saidthelittleman，andit’syours。

Samthrewthepaintedtopsintoacorner，andledthewaythroughadarkpassage，andupawidestaircase。Hepausedattheendofasecondpassage，andheldouthishand。

Hereitis，whisperedtheattorney，ashedepositedthemoneyinthehandoftheirguide。

Themansteppedforwardforafewpacesfollowedbythetwofriendsandtheirlegaladviser。Hestoppedatadoor。

Isthistheroom？murmuredthelittlegentleman。

Samnoddedassent。

OldWardleopenedthedoor。andthewholethreewalkedintotheroomjustasMr。Jingle，whohadthatmomentreturned，hadproducedthelicencetothespinsteraunt。

Thespinsterutteredaloudshriek，and，throwingherselfinachair，coveredherfacewithherhands。Mr。Jinglecrumpledupthelicence，andthrustitintohiscoat-pocket。Theunwelcomevisitorsadvancedintothemiddleoftheroom。

You——youareanicerascal，arn’tyou？exclaimedWardle，breathlesswithpassion。

Mydearsir，mydearsir，saidthelittleman，layinghishatonthetable。Pray，consider——pray。Defamationofcharacter：actionfordamages。

Calmyourself，mydearsir，pray——

Howdareyoudragmysisterfrommyhouse？saidtheoldman。

Ay——ay——verygood，saidthelittlegentleman，youmayaskthat。Howdareyou，sir？——eh，sir？

Whothedevilareyou？inquiredMr。Jingle，insofierceatone，thatthelittlegentlemaninvoluntarilyfellbackasteportwo。

Whoishe，youscoundrel，interposedWardle。He’smylawyer，Mr。

Perker，ofGray’sInn。Perker，I’llhavethisfellowprosecuted——indicted——I’ll——I’ll——I’llruinhim。Andyou，continuedMr。Wardle，turningabruptlyroundtohissister，you，Rachael，atatimeoflifewhenyououghttoknowbetter，whatdoyoumeanbyrunningawaywithavagabond，disgracingyoufamily，andmakingyourselfmiserable。Getonyourbonnet，andcomeback。

Callahackney-coachthere，directly，andbringthislady’sbill，d’yehear——d’yehear？

Cert’nly，sir，repliedSam，whohadansweredWardle’sviolentringingofthebellwithadegreeofceleritywhichmusthaveappearedmarvelloustoanybodywhodidn’tknowthathiseyehadbeenappliedtotheoutsideofthekeyholeduringthewholeinterview。

Getonyourbonnet，repeatedWardle。

Donothingofthekind，saidJingle。Leavetheroom，sir——nobusinesshere——lady’sfreetoactasshepleases——morethanone-and-twenty。

Morethanone-and-twenty！ejaculatedWardle，contemptuously。Morethanone-and-forty！

Ian’t，saidthespinsteraunt，herindignationgettingthebetterofherdeterminationtofaint。**

Youare，repliedWardle，you’refiftyifyou’reanhour。

Herethespinsterauntutteredaloudshriek，andbecamesenseless。

Aglassofwater，saidthehumaneMr。Pickwick，summoningthelandlady。

Aglassofwater！saidthepassionateWardle。Bringabucket，andthrowitalloverher。it’lldohergood，andsherichlydeservesit。

Ugh，youbrute！ejaculatedthekind-heartedlandlady。Poordear。

Andwithsundryejaculations，ofComenow，there’sadear——drinkalittleofthis——it’lldoyougood——don’tgivewayso——there’salove，etc。，etc。，thelandlady，assistedbyachamber-maid，proceededtovinegartheforehead，beatthehands，titillatethenose，andunlacethestaysofthespinsteraunt，andtoadministersuchotherrestorativesasareusuallyappliedbycompassionatefemalestoladieswhoareendeavouringtofermentthemselvesintohysterics。

Coachisready，sir，saidSam，appearingatthedoor。

Comealong。criedWardle。I’llcarryherdownstairs。

Atthisproposition，thehystericscameonwithredoubledviolence。

Thelandladywasabouttoenteraveryviolentprotestagainstthisproceeding，andhadalreadygivenventtoanindignantinquirywhetherMr。Wardleconsideredhimselfalordofcreation，whenMr。Jingleinterposed——

Boots，saidhe，getmeanofficer。

Stay，stay，saidlittleMr。Perker。Consider，sir，consider。

I’llnotconsider，repliedJingle。She’sherownmistress——seewhodarestotakeheraway——unlessshewishesit。

Iwon’tbetakenaway，murmuredthespinsteraunt。Idon’twishit。(Heretherewasafrightfulrelapse。)

Mydearsir，saidthelittleman，inalowtone，takingMr。WardleandMr。Pickwickapart：Mydearsir，we’reinaveryawkwardsituation。

It’sadistressingcase——very。Ineverknewonemoreso。butreally，mydearsir，reallywehavenopowertocontrolthislady’sactions。Iwarnedyoubeforewecame，mydearsir，thattherewasnothingtolooktobutacompromise。

Therewasashortpause。

Whatkindofcompromisewouldyourecommend？inquiredMr。Pickwick。

Why，mydearsir，ourfriend’sinanunpleasantposition——verymuchso。Wemustbecontenttosuffersomepecuniaryloss。

I’llsufferany，ratherthansubmittothisdisgrace，andlether，foolassheis，bemademiserableforlife，saidWardle。

Iratherthinkitcanbedone，saidthebustlinglittleman。Mr。

Jingle，willyoustepwithusintothenextroomforamoment？

Mr。Jingleassented，andthequartettewalkedintoanemptyapartment。

Now，sir，saidthelittleman，ashecarefullyclosedthedoor，istherenowayofaccommodatingthismatter——stepthisway，sir，foramoment——intothiswindow，sir，wherewecanbealone——there，sir，there，praysitdown，sir。Now，mydearsir，betweenyouandI，weknowverywell，mydearsir，thatyouhaverunoffwiththisladyforthesakeofhermoney。Don’tfrown，sir，don’tfrown。Isay，betweenyouandI，weknowit。Wearebothmenoftheworld，andweknowverywellthatourfriendshere，arenot——eh？

Mr。Jingle’sfacegraduallyrelaxed。andsomethingdistantlyresemblingawinkquiveredforaninstantinhislefteye。

Verygood，verygood，saidthelittleman，observingtheimpressionhehadmade。Nowthefactis，thatbeyondafewhundreds，theladyhaslittleornothingtillthedeathofhermother——fineoldlady，mydearsir。

Old，saidMr。Jingle，brieflybutemphatically。

Why，yes，saidtheattorneywithaslightcough。Youareright，mydearsir，sheisratherold。Shecomesofanoldfamilythough，mydearsir。oldineverysenseoftheword。ThefounderofthatfamilycameintoKent，whenJuliusCaesarinvadedBritain——onlyonememberofit，since，whohasn’tlivedtoeighty-five，andhewasbeheadedbyoneoftheHenrys。Theoldladyisnotseventy-threenow，mydearsir。

Thelittlemanpaused，andtookapinchofsnuff。

Well，criedMr。Jingle。

Well，mydearsir——youdon’ttakesnuff！——ah！somuchthebetter——expensivehabit——well，mydearsir，you’reafineyoungman，manoftheworld——abletopushyourfortune，ifyouhadcapital，eh？

Well，saidMr。Jingleagain。

Doyoucomprehendme？

Notquite。

Don’tyouthink——now，mydearsir，Iputittoyou，don’tyouthink——thatfiftypoundsandliberty，wouldbebetterthanMissWardleandexpectation？

Won’tdo——nothalfenough！saidMr。Jinglerising。

Nay，nay，mydearsir，remonstratedthelittleattorney，seizinghimbythebutton。Goodroundsum——amanlikeyoucouldtrebleitinnotime——greatdealtobedonewithfiftypounds，mydearsir。

Moretobedonewithahundredandfifty，repliedMr。Jingle，coolly。

Well，mydearsir，wewon’twastetimeinsplittingstraws，resumedthelittleman，say——say——seventy。

Won’tdo，saidMr。Jingle。

Don’tgoaway，mydearsir——praydon’thurry，saidthelittleman。

Eighty。come：I’llwriteyouachequeatonce。

Won’tdo，saidMr。Jingle。

Well，mydearsir，well，saidthelittleman，stilldetaininghim。

justtellmewhatwilldo。

Expensiveaffair，saidMr。Jingle。Moneyoutofpocket——posting，ninepounds。licence，three——that’stwelve——compensation，ahundred——hundredandtwelve——Breachofhonour——andlossofthelady——

Yes，mydearsir，yes，saidthelittleman，withaknowinglook，nevermindthelasttwoitems。That’sahundredandtwelve——sayahundred——come。

Andtwenty，saidMr。Jingle。

Come，come，I’llwriteyouacheque，saidthelittleman。anddownhesatatthetableforthatpurpose。

I’llmakeitpayablethedayafterto-morrow，saidthelittleman，withalooktowardsMr。Wardle。andwecangettheladyaway，meanwhile。

Mr。Wardlesullenlynoddedassent。

Ahundred，saidthelittleman。

Andtwenty，saidMr。Jingle。

Mydearsir，remonstratedthelittleman。

Giveithim，interposedMr。Wardle，andlethimgo。

Thechequewaswrittenbythelittlegentleman，andpocketedbyMr。

Jingle。

Now，leavethishouseinstantly！saidWardle，startingup。

Mydearsir，urgedthelittleman。

Andmind，saidMr。Wardle，thatnothingshouldhaveinducedmetomakethiscompromise——notevenaregardformyfamily——ifIhadnotknownthatthemomentyougotanymoneyinthatpocketofyours，you’dgotothedevilfaster，ifpossible，thanyouwouldwithoutit——

Mydearsir，urgedthelittlemanagain。

Bequiet。Perker，resumedWardle。Leavetheroom，sir。

Offdirectly，saidtheunabashedJingle。Byebye，Pickwick。

Ifanydispassionatespectatorcouldhavebeheldthecountenanceoftheillustriousman，whosenameformstheleadingfeatureofthetitleofthiswork，duringthelatterpartofthisconversation，hewouldhavebeenalmostinducedtowonderthattheindignantfirewhichflashedfromhiseyes，didnotmelttheglassesofhisspectacles——somajesticwashiswrath。Hisnostrilsdilated，andhisfistsclenchedinvoluntarily，asheheardhimselfaddressedbythevillain。Butherestrainedhimselfagain——hedidnotpulverisehim。

Here，continuedthehardenedtraitor，tossingthelicenceatMr。Pickwick’sfeet。getthenamealtered——takehomethelady——doforTuppy。

Mr。Pickwickwasaphilosopher，butphilosophersareonlymeninarmour，afterall。Theshafthadreachedhim，penetratedthroughhisphilosophicalharness，tohisveryheart。Inthefrenzyofhisragehehurledtheinkstandmadlyforward，andfollowedituphimself。ButMr。Jinglehaddisappeared，andhefoundhimselfcaughtinthearmsofSam。

Hallo，saidthateccentricfunctionary，furniter’scheapwhereyoucomefrom，sir。Self-actingink，that’ere。it’swroteyoumarkuponthewall，oldgen’lm’n。Holdstill，sir。wot’stheuseo’runnin’arteramanashasmadehislucky，andgottot’otherendoftheBoroughbythistime。

Mr。Pickwick’smind，likethoseofalltrulygreatmen，wasopentoconviction。Hewasaquickandpowerfulreasoner。andamoment’sreflectionsufficedtoremindhimoftheimpotencyofhisrage。Itsubsidedasquicklyasithadbeenroused。Hepantedforbreath，andlookedbenignantlyrounduponhisfriends。

Shallwetellthelamentationsthatensued，whenMissWardlefoundherselfdesertedbythefaithlessJingle？ShallweextractMr。Pickwick’smasterlydescriptionofthatheartrendingscene？Hisnote-book，blottedwiththetearsofsympathisinghumanity，liesopenbeforeus。oneword，anditisintheprinter’shands。But，no！wewillberesolute！Wewillnotwringthepublicbosom，withthedelineationofsuchsuffering！

Slowlyandsadlydidthetwofriendsandthedesertedlady，returnnextdayintheMuggletonheavycoach。Dimlyanddarklyhadthesombreshadowsofasummer’snightfallenuponallaround，whentheyagainreachedDingleyDell，andstoodwithintheentrancetoManorFarm。

[NextChapter][TableofContents]ThePickwickPapers：Chapter11[PreviousChapter][TableofContents]CHAPTERXIINVOLVINGANOTHERJOURNEY，ANDANANTIQUARIANDISCOVERY。

RECORDINGMR。PICKWICK’SDETERMINATIONTOBEPRESENTATANELECTION。AND

CONTAININGAMANUSCRIPTOFTHEOLDCLERGYMAN’S

ANIGHTofquietandreposeintheprofoundsilenceofDingleyDell，andanhour’sbreathingofitsfreshandfragrantairontheensuingmorning，completelyrecoveredMr。Pickwickfromtheeffectsofhislatefatigueofbodyandanxietyofmind。Thatillustriousmanhadbeenseparatedfromhisfriendsandfollowers，fortwowholedays。anditwaswithadegreeofpleasureanddelight，whichnocommonimaginationcanadequatelyconceive，thathesteppedforwardtogreetMr。WinkleandMr。Snodgrass，asheencounteredthosegentlemenonhisreturnfromhisearlywalk。Thepleasurewasmutual。forwhocouldevergazeonMr。Pickwick’sbeamingfacewithoutexperiencingthesensation？Butstillacloudseemedtohangoverhiscompanionswhichthatgreatmancouldnotbutbesensibleof，andwaswhollyatalosstoaccountfor。Therewasamysteriousairaboutthemboth，asunusualasitwasalarming。

Andhow，saidMr。Pickwick，whenhehadgraspedhisfollowersbythehand，andexchangedwarmsalutationsofwelcome。howisTupman？

Mr。Winkle，towhomthequestionwasmorepeculiarlyaddressed，madenoreply。Heturnedawayhishead，andappearedabsorbedinmelancholyreflections。

Snodgrass，saidMr。Pickwick，earnestly，Howisourfriend——heisnotill？

No，repliedMr。Snodgrass。andateartrembledonhissentimentaleye-lid，likearain-droponawindow-frame。No。heisnotill。

Mr。Pickwickstopped，andgazedoneachofhisfriendsinturn。

Winkle——Snodgrass，saidMr。Pickwick：whatdoesthismean？Whereisourfriend？Whathashappened？Speak——Iconjure，Ientreat——nay，Icommandyou，speak。

Therewasasolemnity——adignity——inMr。Pickwick’smanner，nottobewithstood。

Heisgone，saidMr。Snodgrass。

Gone！exclaimedMr。Pickwick。Gone！

Gone，repeatedMr。Snodgrass。

Where！ejaculatedMr。Pickwick。

Wecanonlyguessfromthatcommunication，repliedMr。Snodgrass，takingaletterfromhispocket，andplacingitinhisfriend’shand。Yesterdaymorning，whenaletterwasreceivedfromMr。Wardle，statingthatyouwouldbehomewithhissisteratnight，themelancholywhichhadhungoverourfriendduringthewholeofthepreviousday，wasobservedtoincrease。

Heshortlyafterwardsdisappeared：hewasmissingduringthewholeday，andintheeveningthisletterwasbroughtbythehostlerfromtheCrown，atMuggleton。Ithadbeenleftinhischargeinthemorning，withastrictinjunctionthatitshouldnotbedelivereduntilnight。

Mr。Pickwickopenedtheepistle。Itwasinhisfriend’shandwriting，andthesewereitscontents：——

MydearPickwick，You，mydearfriend，areplacedfarbeyondthereachofmanymortalfrailtiesandweaknesseswhichordinarypeoplecannotovercome。Youdonotknowwhatitis，atoneblow，tobedesertedbyalovelyandfascinatingcreature，andtofallavictimtotheartificesofavillain，whohidthegrinofcunning，beneaththemaskoffriendship。Ihopeyounevermay。

Anyletter，addressedtomeattheLeatherBottle，Cobham，Kent，willbeforwarded——supposingIstillexist。Ihastenfromthesightofthatworld，whichhasbecomeodioustome。ShouldIhastenfromitaltogether，pity——forgiveme。Life，mydearPickwick，hasbecomeinsupportabletome。

Thespiritwhichburnswithinus，isaporter’sknot，onwhichtoresttheheavyloadofworldlycaresandtroubles。andwhenthatspiritfailsus，theburdenistooheavytobeborne。Wesinkbeneathit。YoumaytellRachael——Ah，thatname！。

TRACYTUPMAN。