第18章

LADYLUNDIEpointedsignificantlytothedoor，andaddressedherselftoSirPatrick’sprivateear。

“Observe!“shesaid。“MissSilvesterhasjustgotridofsomebody。“

SirPatrickdeliberatelylookedinthewrongdirection，and(inthepolitestpossiblemanner)observed——nothing。

LadyLundieadvancedintothesummer-house。Suspicioushatredofthegovernesswaswrittenlegiblyineverylineofherface。

Suspiciousdistrustofthegoverness’sillnessspokeplainlyineverytoneofhervoice。

“MayIinquire，MissSilvester，ifyoursufferingsarerelieved？“

“Iamnobetter，LadyLundie。“

“Ibegyourpardon？“

“IsaidIwasnobetter。“

“Youappeartobeabletostandup。When_I_amill，Iamnotsofortunate。Iamobligedtoliedown。“’

“Iwillfollowyourexample，LadyLundie。Ifyouwillbesogoodastoexcuseme，Iwillleaveyou，andliedowninmyownroom。“

Shecouldsaynomore。TheinterviewwithGeoffreyhadwornherout；therewasnospiritleftinhertoresistthepettymaliceofthewoman，afterbearing，asshehadborneit，thebrutishindifferenceoftheman。Inanothermomentthehystericalsufferingwhichshewaskeepingdownwouldhaveforceditswayoutwardintears。Withoutwaitingtoknowwhethershewasexcusedornot，withoutstoppingtohearawordmore，sheleftthesummer-house。

LadyLundie’smagnificentblackeyesopenedtotheirutmostwidth，andblazedwiththeirmostdazzlingbrightness。SheappealedtoSirPatrick，poisedeasilyonhisivorycane，andlookingoutatthelawn-party，thepictureofvenerableinnocence。

“AfterwhatIhavealreadytoldyou，SirPatrick，ofMissSilvester’sconduct，mayIaskwhetheryouconsider_that_

proceedingatallextraordinary？“

Theoldgentlemantouchedthespringintheknobofhiscane，andanswered，inthecourtlymanneroftheoldschool：

“IconsidernoproceedingextraordinaryLadyLundie，whichemanatesfromyourenchantingsex。“

Hebowed，andtookhispinch。Withalittlejauntyflourishofthehand，hedustedthestraygrainsofsnuffoffhisfingerandthumb，andlookedbackagainatthelawn-party，andbecamemoreabsorbedinthediversionsofhisyoungfriendsthanever。

LadyLundiestoodherground，plainlydeterminedtoforceaseriousexpressionofopinionfromherbrother-in-law。Beforeshecouldspeakagain，ArnoldandBlancheappearedtogetheratthebottomofthesteps。“Andwhendoesthedancingbegin？“inquiredSirPatrick，advancingtomeetthem，andlookingasifhefeltthedeepestinterestinaspeedysettlementofthequestion。

“TheverythingIwasgoingtoaskmamma，“returnedBlanche。“IssheintherewithAnne？IsAnnebetter？“

LadyLundieforthwithappeared，andtooktheanswertothatinquiryonherself。

“MissSilvesterhasretiredtoherroom。MissSilvesterpersistsinbeingill。Haveyounoticed，SirPatrick，thatthesehalf-bredsortofpeoplearealmostinvariablyrudewhentheyareill？“

Blanche’sbrightfaceflushedup。“IfyouthinkAnneahalf-bredperson，LadyLundie，youstandaloneinyouropinion。Myuncledoesn’tagreewithyou，I’msure。“

SirPatrick’sinterestinthefirstquadrillebecamealmostpainfultosee。“_Do_tellme，mydear，when_is_thedancinggoingtobegin？“

“Thesoonerthebetter，“interposedLadyLundie；“beforeBlanchepicksanotherquarrelwithmeonthesubjectofMissSilvester。“

Blanchelookedatheruncle。“Begin!begin!Don’tlosetime!“

criedtheardentSirPatrick，pointingtowardthehousewithhiscane。“Certainly，uncle!Anythingthat_you_wish!“Withthatpartingshotatherstep-mother，Blanchewithdrew。Arnold，whohadthusfarwaitedinsilenceatthefootofthesteps，lookedappealinglyatSirPatrick。Thetrainwhichwastotakehimtohisnewlyinheritedpropertywouldstartinlessthananhour；

andhehadnotpresentedhimselftoBlanche’sguardianinthecharacterofBlanche’ssuitoryet!SirPatrick’sindifferencetoalldomesticclaimsonhim——claimsofpersonswholoved，andclaimsofpersonswhohated，itdidn’tmatterwhich——remainedperfectlyunassailable。Therehestood，poisedonhiscane，humminganoldScotchair。AndtherewasLadyLundie，resolutenottoleavehimtillhehadseenthegovernesswith_her_eyesandjudgedthegovernesswith_her_mind。Shereturnedtothecharge——inspiteofSirPatrick，hummingatthetopofthesteps，andofArnold，waitingatthebottom。(Herenemiessaid，“NowonderpoorSirThomasdiedinafewmonthsafterhismarriage!“

And，ohdearme，ourenemies_are_sometimesright!)

“Imustoncemoreremindyou，SirPatrick，thatIhaveseriousreasontodoubtwhetherMissSilvesterisafitcompanionforBlanche。Mygovernesshassomethingonhermind。Shehasfitsofcryinginprivate。Sheisupandwalkingaboutherroomwhensheoughttobeasleep。Shepostsherownletters——_and，_shehaslatelybeenexcessivelyinsolenttoMe。Thereissomethingwrong。

Imusttakesomestepsinthematter——anditisonlyproperthatIshoulddosowithyoursanction，asheadofthefamily。“

“Considermeasabdicatingmyposition，LadyLundie，inyourfavor。“

“SirPatrick，IbegyoutoobservethatIamspeakingseriously，andthatIexpectaseriousreply。“

“Mygoodlady，askmeforanythingelseanditisatyourservice。IhavenotmadeaseriousreplysinceIgaveuppracticeattheScottishBar。Atmyage，“addedSirPatrick，cunninglydriftingintogeneralities，“nothingisserious——exceptIndigestion。Isay，withthephilosopher，’Lifeisacomedytothosewhothink，andtragedytothosewhofeel。’“Hetookhissister-in-law’shand，andkissedit。“DearLadyLundie，whyfeel？“

LadyLundie，whohadnever“felt“inherlife，appearedperverselydeterminedtofeel，onthisoccasion。Shewasoffended——andsheshoweditplainly。

“Whenyouarenextcalledon，SirPatrick，tojudgeofMissSilvester’sconduct，“shesaid，“unlessIamentirelymistaken，youwillfindyourself_compelled_toconsideritassomethingbeyondajoke。“Withthosewords，shewalkedoutofthesummer-house——andsoforwardedArnold’sinterestsbyleavingBlanche’sguardianaloneatlast。

Itwasanexcellentopportunity。Theguestsweresafeinthehouse——therewasnointerruptiontobefeared，Arnoldshowedhimself。SirPatrick(perfectlyundisturbedbyLadyLundie’spartingspeech)satdowninthesummer-house，withoutnoticinghisyoungfriend，andaskedhimselfaquestionfoundedonprofoundobservationofthefemalesex。“Werethereevertwowomenyetwithaquarrelbetweenthem，“thoughttheoldgentleman，“whodidn’twanttodragamanintoit？Letthemdrag_me_in，iftheycan!“

Arnoldadvancedastep，andmodestlyannouncedhimself。“IhopeI

amnotintheway，SirPatrick？“

“Intheway？ofcoursenot!Blessmysoul，howserioustheboylooks!Are_you_goingtoappealtomeastheheadofthefamilynext？“

ItwasexactlywhatArnoldwasabouttodo。ButitwasplainthatifheadmitteditjustthenSirPatrick(forsomeunintelligiblereason)woulddeclinetolistentohim。Heansweredcautiously，“Iaskedleavetoconsultyouinprivate，Sir；andyoukindlysaidyouwouldgivemetheopportunitybeforeIleftW

indygates？“

“Ay!ay!tobesure。Iremember。Wewerebothengagedintheseriousbusinessofcroquetatthetime——anditwasdoubtfulwhichofusdidthatbusinessmostclumsily。Well，hereistheopportunity；andhereamI，withallmyworldlyexperience，atyourservice。Ihaveonlyonecautiontogiveyou。Don’tappealtomeas’theheadofthefamily。’MyresignationisinLadyLundie’shands。“

Hewas，asusual，halfinjest，halfinearnest。Thewrytwistofhumorshoweditselfatthecornersofhislips。ArnoldwasatalosshowtoapproachSirPatrickonthesubjectofhisniecewithoutremindinghimofhisdomesticresponsibilitiesontheonehand，andwithoutsettinghimselfupasatargetfortheshaftsofSirPatrick’switontheother。Inthisdifficulty，hecommittedamistakeattheoutset。Hehesitated。

“Don’thurryyourself，“saidSirPatrick。“Collectyourideas。I

canwait!Icanwait!“

Arnoldcollectedhisideas——andcommittedasecondmistake。Hedeterminedonfeelinghiswaycautiouslyatfirst。Underthecircumstances(andwithsuchamanashehadnowtodealwith)，itwasperhapstherashestresolutionatwhichhecouldpossiblyhavearrived——itwasthemouseattemptingtooutmanoeuvrethecat“Youhavebeenverykind，Sir，inofferingmethebenefitofyourexperience，“hebegan。“Iwantawordofadvice。“

“Supposeyoutakeitsitting？“suggestedSirPatrick。“Getachair。“HissharpeyesfollowedArnoldwithanexpressionofmaliciousenjoyment。“Wantsmyadvice？“hethought。“Theyounghumbugwantsnothingofthesort——hewantsmyniece。“

ArnoldsatdownunderSirPatrick’seye，withawell-foundedsuspicionthathewasdestinedtosuffer，beforehegotupagain，underSirPatrick’stongue。