第55章

AshethoughtfurtherherememberedthatallthingsworktogetherforgoodtothemthatloveGod；wasitpossible，heaskedhimself，thathetoo，howeverimperfectly，hadbeentryingtolovehim？HedarednotanswerYes，buthewouldtryhardthatitshouldbeso。

ThentherecameintohismindthatnobleairofHandel’s：“GreatGod，whoyetbutdarklyknown。”andhefeltitashehadneverfeltitbefore。HehadlosthisfaithinChristianity，buthisfaithinsomething——heknewnotwhat，butthattherewasasomethingasyetbutdarklyknownwhichmaderightrightandwrongwrong——hisfaithinthisgrewstrongerandstrongerdaily。

Againtherecrossedhismindthoughtsofthepowerwhichhefelttobeinhim，andofhowandwhereitwastofinditsvent。Thesameinstinctwhichhadledhimtoliveamongthepoorbecauseitwasthenearestthingtohimwhichhecouldlayholdofwithanyclearnesscametohisassistanceheretoo。HethoughtoftheAustraliangoldandhowthosewholivedamongithadneverseenitthoughitaboundedallaroundthem：“Thereisgoldeverywhere。”heexclaimedinwardly，“tothosewholookforit。”Mightnothisopportunitybecloseuponhimifhelookedcarefullyenoughathisimmediatesurroundings？Whatwashisposition？Hehadlostall。Couldhenotturnhishavinglostallintoanopportunity？Mighthenot，ifhetoosoughtthestrengthoftheLord，find，likeStPaul，thatitwasperfectedinweakness？

Hehadnothingmoretolose；money，friends，character，allweregoneforaverylongtimeifnotforever；buttherewassomethingelsealsothathadtakenitsflightalongwiththese。Imeanthefearofthatwhichmancoulddountohim。Cantabilvacuus。Whocouldhurthimmorethanhehadbeenhurtalready？Lethimbutbeabletoearnhisbread，andheknewofnothingwhichhedarednotventureifitwouldmaketheworldahappierplaceforthosewhowereyoungandloveable。Hereinhefoundsomuchcomfortthathealmostwishedhehadlosthisreputationevenmorecompletely——forhesawthatitwaslikeaman’slifewhichmaybefoundofthemthatloseitandlostofthemthatwouldfindit。HeshouldnothavehadthecouragetogiveupallforChrist’ssake，butnowChristhadmercifullytakenall，andlo！itseemedasthoughallwerefound。

AsthedayswentslowlybyhecametoseethatChristianityandthedenialofChristianityafterallmetasmuchasanyotherextremesdo；itwasafightaboutnames——notaboutthings；practicallytheChurchofRome，theChurchofEngland，andthefreethinkerhavethesameidealstandardandmeetinthegentleman；forheisthemostperfectsaintwhoisthemostperfectgentleman。Thenhesawalsothatitmatterslittlewhatprofession，whetherofreligionorirreligion，amanmaymake，providedonlyhefollowsitoutwithcharitableinconsistency，andwithoutinsistingonittothebitterend。Itisintheuncompromisingnesswithwhichdogmaisheldandnotinthedogmaorwantofdogmathatthedangerlies。Thiswasthecrowningpointoftheedifice；whenhehadgotherehenolongerwishedtomolesteventhePope。TheArchbishopofCanterburymighthavehoppedaboutallroundhimandevenpickedcrumbsoutofhishandwithoutrunningriskofgettingaslysprinkleofsalt。Thatwaryprelatehimselfmightperhapshavebeenofadifferentopinion，buttherobinsandthrushesthathopaboutourlawnsarenotmoreneedlesslydistrustfulofthehandthatthrowsthemo