第14章

OutintheBowLegcountryLinMcLeanhadmetawomanwiththick，redcheeks，callingherselfbyamaidenname；andthiswashiswholeknowledgeofherwhenheputheronemorningastrideaMexicansaddleandtookherfiftymilestoamagistrateandmadeherhislawfulwifetothebestofhisabilityandbelief。Hissage-brushintimateswereconfidenthewouldneverhavedoneitbutforarival。RacingtherivalandbeatinghimhadsweptMr。McLeanpasthisownintentions，andthemarriagewasaninadvertence。“Hejestbumpedintoitbeforehecouldpullup，“theyexplained；andthiscasualty，resultingfromMr。McLean’ssportingblood，hadentertainedseveralhundredsquaremilesofalkali。Forthenew-madehusbandthejokesoondied。Intheimmediateweeksthatcameuponhimhetastedabitternessworsethaninallhislifebefore，andlearnedalsohowdeepthewoman，whenonceshebegins，cansinkbeneaththemaninbaseness。Thatwasaknowledgeofwhichhehadlivedinnocentuntilthistime。Buthecarriedhisoutwardselfserenely，sothatcitizensinCheyennewhosawthecow-puncherwithhisbridearguedshrewdlythatmenofthatsortlikedwomenofthatsort；andbeforethestrainhadbrokenhisenduranceanunexpectedfirsthusband，namedLusk，hadappearedoneSundayinthestreet，prosperous，forgiving，andexceedinglydrunk。TothearmsofLuskshewentbackinthepublicstreet，desertingMcLeaninthepresenceofCheyenne；andwhenCheyennesawthis，andlearnedhowshehadbeenMrs。Luskforeightlong，ifintermittent，years，Cheyennelaughedloudly。LinMcLeanlaughed，too，andwentabouthisbusiness，readytoswaggeratthenecessarymoment，andwiththenecessarykindofjokealwaysreadytoshieldhishurtspirit。Andsoon，ofcourse，themattergrewstale，seldomrakedupintheBowLegcountrywhereLinhadbeenatwork；solatelyhehadbeguntorememberotherthingsbesidethesmoulderinghumiliation。

“Isshewithhim？“heaskedBarker，andmusinglylistenedwhileBarkertoldhim。TheGovernorhadthoughttomakeitaracystory，withthemoralthatthejokewasnowonLusk；butthatinnermanhadspokenandrevealedthecow-punchertohiminanewandcomplicatedlight；hencehequietedtheproposedlivelycadenceandvocabularyofhisanecdoteaboutthehouseofLusk，butinsteadofnarratinghowMrs。beatMr。onMondays，Wednesdays，andFridays，andMr。tookhisturntheodddays，thusgettingoneaheadofhislady，whilethekidLuskhadoutlinedhisopinionofthefamilybyrecentlyskippingtopartsunknown，Barkerdetailedtheseincidentsmoregravely，addingthatLaramiebelievedMrs。Luskaddictedtoopium。

“Idon’tguessI’llleavemycardon’em，“saidMcLean，grimly，“ifI

strikeLaramie。“

“Youdon’tmindmysayingIthinkyou’rewelloutofthatscrape？“Barkerventured。

“Shucks，no!That’sallright，Doc。Only——yu’seenow。Amangetstiredpretending——oncedinawhile。“

Timehadgonewhiletheywereintalk，anditwasnowhalfafteroneandMr。McLeanlateforthatlong-plottedfirstsquaremeal。Sothefriendsshookhands，wishingeachotherMerryChristmas，andthecow-puncherhastenedtowardhischosencompanionsthroughthestirringcheerfulnessoftheseason。Hisplay-hourhadmadeadullbeginningamongthetoys。Hehadcomeuponpeopleengagedinapleasantgame，andwaited，shyandwelldisposed，forsomebiddingtojoin，buttheyhadgoneonplayingwitheachotherandlefthimout。Andnowhewentalonginasortofhurrytoescapefromthatlonelinesswherehishumanpromptingshadbeenlodgedwithhimuseless。HerewasCheyenne，fullofholidayforsale，andhewithhispocketsfullofmoneytobuy；andwhenhethoughtofShorty，andChalkeye，andDollarBill，thosedandiestohitatownwith，hesteppedoutwithabrisk，falsehope。Itwaswithamentalhurrahandaforetasteofagoodtimecomingthatheputonhistownclothes，aftershavingandadmiringhimself，andsatdowntothesquaremeal。Heateawayanddrankwitharobustimitationofenjoymentthattookinevenhimselfatfirst。

Butthesorrowfulprocessofhisspiritwenton，forallhecoulddo。Ashegropedforthecontentmentwhichhesawaroundhimhebegantoreceivethejokeswithcounterfeitmirth。Memoriestooktheplaceofanticipation，andthroughtheirmoodyshiftingshebegantofeeladistasteforthecompanyofhisfriendsandashrinkingfromtheirlivelyvoices。Heblamedthemforthisatonce。HewassurprisedtothinkhehadneverrecognizedbeforehowlightaweightwasShorty；andherewasChalkeye，whoknewbetter，talkingreligionaftertwoglasses。Presentlythisattackofnoticinghisfriends’shortcomingsmasteredhim，andhismind，accordingtoitswont，changedatastroke。“I’mcelebratingnoChristmaswiththiscrowd，“saidtheinnerman；andwhentheyhadnextrememberedLinMcLeanintheirhilarityhewasgone。

GovernorBarker，finishinghispurchasesathalf-pastthree，wenttomeetafriendcomefromEvanston。Mr。McLeanwasattherailwaystation，buyingaticketforDenver。

“Denver!“exclaimedtheamazedGovernor。

“That’swhatIsaid，“statedMr。McLean，doggedly。

“Geewhiz!“wenthisExcellency。“Whatareyougoingtodothere？“

“Getgoodanddrunk。“

“Can’tyoufindenoughwhiskeyinCheyenne？“

“I’mdrinkingchampagnethistrip。“

Thecow-puncherwentoutontheplatformandgotaboard，andthetrainmovedoff。Barkerhadwalkedouttooinhissurprise，andashestaredafterthelastcar，Mr。McLeanwavedhiswidehatdefiantlyandwentinsidethedoor。

“Andhesayshe’sgotmaturity，“Barkermuttered。“I’veknownhimsinceseventy-nine，andhe’skeptabouteightyearsoldrightalong。“TheGovernorwascross，andsorry，andpresentlycrosser。HisjokesaboutLin’smarriagecamebacktohimandputhiminaragewiththedepartedfool。“Yes，abouteight。Orsix，“saidhisExcellency，justifyinghimselfbythepast。ForhehadfirstknownLin，theboyofnineteen，supremeinlengthoflimbandrecklessness，breakinghorsesandfeelingforanearlymustache。Next，whenthemustachewasnearlyaccomplished，hehadmendedtheboy’sbadlybrokenthighatDrybone。Hisskill(andLin’sutterhealth)hadwroughtsoswiftahealingthatthesurgeonoverflowedwiththeprideofscience，andoverthebandageswouldexplainthehumanbodytechnicallytohiswild-eyedandflatteredpatient。ThusyoungLinheardallabouttibia，andcomminuted，andothergloriousnewwords，andwhensleeplesswouldrehearsethem。Then，withthebonesonearlyknitthatthepatientmightleavethewardoncrutchestositeachmorninginBarker’sroomasaprivilege，thedisobedientchildoftwenty-onehadslippedoutofthehospitalandhobbledhastilytothehogranch，wherewhiskeyandvarietywaitedforalanguishingconvalescent。Herehegrewgay，andwassooncarriedbackwiththelegrefractured。YetBarker’ssurgicalragewasdisarmed，thepatientwassoforlornoverhisdoctor’sprofessionalchagrin。

“Isupposeitain’tnobetterthismorning，Doc？“hehadsaid，humbly，afteranewweekofbedandweights。

“Yourrightleg’sgoingtobeshorter。That’sall。“

“Oh，gosh!I’vebeenandspoiledyourcomminutedfee-mur!Ain’tIason-of-a-gun？“

Youcouldnotchidesuchaboyasthis；andintime’sduecoursehehadwalkedjauntilyoutintotheworldwithlegsofequallengthafterallandinhisstridetheslightesthaltpossible。AndDoctorBarkerhadmissedthechild’sconversation。To-dayhismustachewasaperfectedthing，andheinthelateendofhistwenties。

“He’llwakeupaboutnoonto-morrowinadive，withoutacent，“saidBarker。“Thenhe’llcomebackonafreightandbeginoveragain。“

AttheDenverstationLinMcLeanpassedthroughtheshoutingsandomnibuses，andcametothebeginningofSeventeenthStreet，whereisthefirstsaloon。AcustomerwasorderingHotScotch；andbecausehelikedthesmellandhadnotthoughtofthemixtureforanumberofyears，LintookHotScotch。Comingoutuponthepavement，helookedacrossandsawasaloonoppositewithbrighterglobesandwindowsmoreprosperous。Thatshouldhavebeenhischoice；lemonpeelwouldundoubtedlybefresheroverthere；andoverhewentatonce，tobeginthewholethingproperly。Insuchfrozenweathernodrinkcouldbemoretimely，andhesat，toenjoywithouthasteitsmellowfitness。Onceagainonthepavement，helookedalongthestreettowardup-townbeneaththecrisp，coldelectriclights，andthreelittlebootblacksgatheredwherehestoodandcried“Shine？

Shine？“athim。RememberingthatyoutookthethirdturntotherighttogetthebestdinnerinDenver，LinhitontheskilfulplanofstoppingatallHotScotchesbetween；butthenextoccurredwithinafewyards，anditwasacrossthestreet。Thisonebeingattainedandappreciated，hefoundthathemustcrossbackagainorskipnumberfour。Atthisratehewouldnotbediningintimetoseemuchofthetheatre，andhestoppedtoconsider。ItwasaGermanplacehehadjustquitted，andahugelightpouredoutonhimfromitswindow，whichtheproprietor’sfather-landsentimenthadmadeintoashow。Lightsshoneamongawell-setpineforest，wherebeery，jovialgnomessatonrootsandreachedupwardtoSantaClaus；he，grinning，fat，andTeutonic，heldinhisrighthandforeverafoamingglass，andforeverinhisleftastringofsausagesthatdangleddownamongthegnomes。WithhisAmericanbacktothis，thecow-puncher，wearingthesameserious，absentfacehehadnotchangedsinceheranawayfromhimselfatCheyenne，consideredcarefullytheHotScotchquestion，andwhichsideoftheroadtotakeandstickto，whilethelittlebootblacksfoundhimoncemoreandcried，“Shine？Shine？“

monotonousassnow-birds。Hesettledtostayoverherewiththesouth-sideScotches，andthelittleone-notesongreachinghisattention，hesuddenlyshovedhisfootatthenearestboy，wholightlysprangaway。

“Dareyoutotouchhim!“pipedasnow-bird，dangerously。Theywereinshorttrousers，andtheeldestenemy，itmaybe，wasten。

“Don’thitme，“saidMr。McLean“I’minnocent。“

“Well，youleavehimbe，“saidone。

“What’shelayin’tokickyoufor，Billy？’Tain’tyerpop，isit？“

“New!“saidBilly，inscorn。“Fatherneverkickedme。Don’tknowwhoheis。“

“He’saspecial!“shrilledtheleadingbird，sensationally。“He’sgotabadge，andhe’sgoin’toarrestyer。“

Twoofthemhoppedinstantlytothesafemiddleofthestreet，andscatteredwithpracticedstrategy；butBillystoodhisground。“Dareyoutoarrestme!“saidhe。

“What’llyougivemenotto？“inquiredLin，andheputhishandsinhispockets，armsakimbo。

“Nothing；I’vedonenothing，“announcedBilly，firmly。Buteveninthelastsyllablehisvoicesuddenlyfailed，aterrorfilledhiseyes，andhe，too，spedintothemiddleofthestreet。

“What’sheclaimyoulifted？“inquiredtheleader，witheagerness。“Tellhimyouhaven’tbeeninsideastoreto-day。Wecanproveit!“theyscreamedtothespecialofficer。

“Say，“saidtheslow-spokenLinfromthepavement，“you’repoorjudgesofabadge，youfellows。“

Histonepleasedthemwheretheystood，wideapartfromeachother。

Mr。McLeanalsoremainedstationaryinthebluishilluminationofthewindow。“Why，ifanypolicemanwascaughtwearin’thishere，“saidhe，followinghissprightlyinvention，“he’dgetarrestedhimself。“

Thisstruckthemextremely。Theybegantodrawtogether，Billylingeringthelast。

“Ifit’syouridea，“pursuedMr。McLean，alluringly，asthethreetookcautiousstepsnearerthecurb，“thatblue，claspedhandsinacircleofredstarsgivesthebearertherighttoputfolksinthejug——why，I’llgetsomebodyelsetoblackmybootsforadollar。“

Thethreemadeaswiftrush，fellonsimultaneousknees，andclatteringtheirboxesdown，begantospitinanindustriouscircle。

“Easy!“wheedledMr。McLean，andtheylookedupathim，staringandfascinated。“Nothavingthreefeet，“saidthecow-puncher，alwaysgraveandslow，“Icanonlygivetwothisherejob。“

“He’sgotabigpistolandabelt!“exultedtheleader，whohadprecociouslyfeltbeneathLin’scoat。

“You’reasmartboy，“saidLin，consideringhim，“andyu’findamanoutrightaway。Nowyoustandoffandtellmeallaboutmyselfwhiletheyfixtheboots——andadollargoestothequickestthrough。“

YoungBillyandhistow-headedcompetitorflatteneddown，eachtoaboot，withalltheirmight，whiletheleaderruefullycontemplatedMr。McLean。

“That’saColt。45you’vegot，“venturedhe。

“Rightagain。Someday，maybe，you’llbewearingoneofyourown，iftheangelsdon’tpullyu’beforeyou’reripe。“

“I’mthrough!“sangoutTowhead，risinginhaste。

SmallBillywasstrugglingstill，butleapedatthat，thetwoheadsbobbingtoaleveltogether；andMr。McLean，lookingdown，sawthatthearrangementhadnotbeenagoodonefortheboots。