第18章

\'EventhoughIwishyouhadnevercaredforonebeforeme？\'

\'Yes。Andyoumustnotwishit。Don\'t!\'

\'I\'lltrynotto，Elfride。\'

Soshehoped，butherheartwastroubled。Ifhefeltsodeeplyonthispoint，whatwouldhesaydidheknowall，andseeitasMrs。

Jethwaysawit？Hewouldnevermakeherthehappiestgirlintheworldbytakinghertobehisownforaye。Thethoughtenclosedherasatombwheneveritpresenteditselftoherperturbedbrain。

ShetriedtobelievethatMrs。Jethwaywouldneverdohersuchacruelwrongastoincreasethebadappearanceofherfollybyinnuendoes；andconcludedthatconcealment，havingbeenbegun，mustbepersistedin，ifpossible。Forwhathemightconsiderasbadasthefact，washerpreviousconcealmentofitbystrategy。

ButElfrideknewMrs。Jethwaytobeherenemy，andtohateher。

Itwaspossibleshewoulddoherworst。Andshouldshedoit，allmightbeover。

Wouldthewomanlistentoreason，andbepersuadednottoruinonewhohadneverintentionallyharmedher？

ItwasnightinthevalleybetweenEndelstowCragsandtheshore。

Thebrookwhichtrickledthatwaytotheseawasdistinctinitsmurmursnow，andoverthelineofitscoursetherebegantohangawhiteribandoffog。Againstthesky，onthelefthandofthevale，theblackformofthechurchcouldbeseen。Ontheotherrosehazel-bushes，afewtrees，andwherethesewereabsent，furzetufts——astallasmen——onstemsnearlyasstoutastimber。Theshriekofsomebirdwasoccasionallyheard，asitflewterror-

strickenfromitsfirstroost，toseekanewsleeping-place，whereitmightpassthenightunmolested。

Intheeveningshade，somewaydownthevalley，andunderarowofscrubbyoaks，acottagecouldstillbediscerned。Itstoodabsolutelyalone。Thehousewasratherlarge，andthewindowsofsomeoftheroomswerenailedupwithboardsontheoutside，whichgaveaparticularlydesertedappearancetothewholeerection。

Fromthefrontdooranirregularseriesofroughandmisshapensteps，cutinthesolidrock，leddowntotheedgeofthestreamlet，which，attheirextremity，washollowedintoabasinthroughwhichthewatertrickled。Thiswasevidentlythemeansofwatersupplytothedwellerordwellersinthecottage。

Alightfootstepwashearddescendingfromthehigherslopesofthehillside。Indistinctinthepathwayappearedamovingfemaleshape，whoadvancedandknockedtimidlyatthedoor。Noanswerbeingreturnedtheknockwasrepeated，withthesameresult，anditwasthenrepeatedathirdtime。Thisalsowasunsuccessful。

Fromoneoftheonlytwowindowsonthegroundfloorwhichwerenotboardedupcameraysoflight，noshutterorcurtainobscuringtheroomfromtheeyesofapasserontheoutside。Sofewwalkedthatwayafternightfallthatanysuchmeanstosecuresecrecywereprobablydeemedunnecessary。

Theinequalityoftheraysfallinguponthetreesoutsidetoldthatthelighthaditsorigininaflickeringfireonly。Thevisitor，afterthethirdknocking，steppedalittletotheleftinordertogainaviewoftheinterior，andthrewbackthehoodfromherface。ThedancingyellowsheenrevealedthefairandanxiouscountenanceofElfride。

Insidethehousethisfirelightwasenoughtoilluminetheroomdistinctly，andtoshowthatthefurnitureofthecottagewassuperiortowhatmighthavebeenexpectedfromsounpromisinganexterior。ItalsoshowedtoElfridethattheroomwasempty。

Beyondthelightquiverandflapoftheflamesnothingmovedorwasaudibletherein。

Sheturnedthehandleandentered，throwingoffthecloakwhichenvelopedher，underwhichsheappearedwithouthatorbonnet，andinthesortofhalf-toilettecountrypeopleordinarilydinein。

Thenadvancingtothefootofthestaircaseshecalleddistinctly，butsomewhatfearfully，\'Mrs。Jethway!\'

Noanswer。

Withalookofreliefandregretcombined，denotingthateasecametotheheartanddisappointmenttothebrain，Elfridepausedforseveralminutes，asifundecidedhowtoact。Determiningtowait，shesatdownonachair。Theminutesdrewon，andaftersittingonthethornsofimpatienceforhalfanhour，shesearchedherpocket，tooktherefromaletter，andtoreofftheblankleaf。

Thentakingoutapencilshewroteuponthepaper:

\'DEARMRS。JETHWAY，——Ihavebeentovisityou。Iwantedmuchtoseeyou，butIcannotwaitanylonger。Icametobegyounottoexecutethethreatsyouhaverepeatedtome。Donot，Ibeseechyou，Mrs。Jethway，letanyoneknowIranawayfromhome!Itwouldruinmewithhim，andbreakmyheart。Iwilldoanythingforyou，ifyouwillbekindtome。Inthenameofourcommonwomanhood，donot，Iimploreyou，makeascandalofme——Yours，E。

SWANCOURT。\'

Shefoldedthenotecornerwise，directedit，andplaceditonthetable。Thenagaindrawingthehoodoverhercurlyheadsheemergedsilentlyasshehadcome。

WhilstthisepisodehadbeeninactionatMrs。Jethway\'scottage，Knighthadgonefromthedining-roomintothedrawing-room，andfoundMrs。Swancourttherealone。

\'Elfridehasvanishedupstairsorsomewhere，\'shesaid。

\'AndIhavebeenreadinganarticleinanoldnumberofthePRESENTthatIlightedonbychanceashorttimeago；itisanarticleyouoncetolduswasyours。Well，Harry，withduedeferencetoyourliterarypowers，allowmetosaythatthiseffusionisallnonsense，inmyopinion。\'

\'Whatisitabout？\'saidKnight，takingupthepaperandreading。

\'There:don\'tgetredaboutit。Ownthatexperiencehastaughtyoutobemorecharitable。Ihaveneverreadsuchunchivalroussentimentsinmylife——fromaman，Imean。There，Iforgiveyou；

itwasbeforeyouknewElfride。\'

\'Ohyes，\'saidKnight，lookingup。\'Iremembernow。Thetextofthatsermonwasnotmyownatall，butwassuggestedtomebyayoungmannamedSmith——thesamewhomIhavementionedtoyouascomingfromthisparish。Ithoughttheidearatheringeniousatthetime，andenlargedittotheweightofafewguineas，becauseIhadnothingelseinmyhead。\'

\'Whichideadoyoucallthetext？Iamcurioustoknowthat。\'

\'Well，this，\'saidKnight，somewhatunwillingly。\'Thatexperienceteaches，andyoursweetheart，nolessthanyourtailor，isnecessarilyveryimperfectinherduties，ifyouareherfirstpatron:andconversely，thesweetheartwhoisgracefulundertheinitialkissmustbesupposedtohavehadsomepracticeinthetrade。\'

\'Anddoyoumeantosaythatyouwrotethatuponthestrengthofanotherman\'sremark，withouthavingtesteditbypractice？\'

\'Yes——indeedIdo。\'

\'ThenIthinkitwasuncalledforandunfair。Andhowdoyouknowitistrue？Iexpectyouregretitnow。\'

\'Sinceyoubringmeintoaseriousmood，Iwillspeakcandidly。I

dobelievethatremarktobeperfectlytrue，and，havingwrittenit，Iwoulddefenditanywhere。ButIdooftenregrethavingeverwrittenit，aswellasothersofthesort。Ihavegrownoldersince，andIfindsuchatoneofwritingiscalculatedtodoharmintheworld。EveryliteraryJackbecomesagentlemanifhecanonlypenafewindifferentsatiresuponwomankind:womenthemselves，too，havetakentothetrick；andso，uponthewhole，Ibegintoberatherashamedofmycompanions。\'

\'Ah，Henry，youhavefalleninlovesinceanditmakesadifference，\'saidMrs。Swancourtwithafainttoneofbanter。

\'That\'strue；butthatisnotmyreason。\'

\'Havingfoundthat，inacaseofyourownexperience，aso-calledgoosewasaswan，itseemsabsurdtodenysuchapossibilityinothermen\'sexperiences。\'

\'Youcanhitpalpably，cousinCharlotte，\'saidKnight。\'Youareliketheboywhoputsastoneinsidehissnowball，andIshallplaywithyounolonger。Excuseme——Iamgoingformyeveningstroll。\'

ThoughKnighthadspokenjestingly，thisincidentandconversationhadcausedhimasuddendepression。Coming，rathersingularly，justafterhisdiscoverythatElfridehadknownwhatitwastolovewarmlybeforeshehadknownhim，hisminddweltuponthesubject，andthefamiliarpipehesmoked，whilstpacingupanddowntheshrubbery-path，failedtobeasolace。Hethoughtagainofthoseidlewords——hithertoquiteforgotten——aboutthefirstkissofagirl，andthetheoryseemedmorethanreasonable。OfcoursetheirstingnowlayintheirbearingonElfride。

Elfride，underKnight\'skiss，hadcertainlybeenaverydifferentwomanfromherselfunderStephen\'s。Whetherforgoodorforill，shehadmarvellouslywelllearntabetrothedlady\'spart；andthefascinatingfinishofherdeportmentinthissecondcampaigndidprobablyarisefromherunreservedencouragementofStephen。

Knight，withalltherapidityofjealoussensitiveness，pounceduponsomewordsshehadinadvertentlyletfallaboutanearring，whichhehadonlypartiallyunderstoodatthetime。Itwasduringthat\'initialkiss\'bythelittlewaterfall:

\'Wemustbecareful。Ilosttheotherbydoingthis!\'

Aflushwhichhadinitasmuchofwoundedprideasofsorrow，passedoverKnightashethoughtofwhathehadsofrequentlysaidtoherinhissimplicity。\'Ialwaysmeanttobethefirstcomerinawoman\'sheart，freshlipsornoneforme。\'Howchildishlyblindhemusthaveseemedtothismeregirl!Howshemusthavelaughedathiminwardly!Heabsolutelywrithedashethoughtoftheconfessionshehadwrungfromhimontheboatinthedarknessofnight。Theoneconceptionwhichhadsustainedhisdignitywhendrawnoutofhisshellonthatoccasion——thatofhercharmingignoranceofallsuchmatters——howabsurditwas!

Thisman，whoseimaginationhadbeenfeduptopreternaturalsizebylonelystudyandsilentobservationsofhiskind——whoseemotionshadbeendrawnoutlonganddelicatebyhisseclusion，likeplantsinacellar——wasnowabsolutelyinpain。Moreover，severalyearsofpoeticstudy，and，ifthetruthmustbetold，poeticefforts，hadtendedtodeveloptheaffectivesideofhisconstitutionstillfurther，inproportiontohisactivefaculties。

ItwashisbeliefintheabsolutenewnessofblandishmenttoElfridewhichhadconstitutedherprimarycharm。Hebegantothinkitwasashardtobeearliestinawoman\'sheartasitwastobefirstinthePoolofBethesda。

ThatKnightshouldhavebeenthusconstituted:thatElfride\'ssecondlovershouldnothavebeenoneofthegreatmassofbustlingmankind，littlegiventointrospection，whosegood-naturemighthavecompensatedforanylackofappreciativeness，wasthechanceofthings。Thatherthrobbing，self-confounding，indiscreetheartshouldhavetodefenditselfunaidedagainstthekeenscrutinyandlogicalpowerwhichKnight，nowthathissuspicionswereawakened，wouldsoonerorlaterbesuretoexerciseagainsther，washermisfortune。Amiserableincongruitywasapparentinthecircumstanceofastrongmindpractisingitsunerringarcheryuponaheartwhichtheownerofthatmindlovedbetterthanhisown。

Elfride\'sdociledevotiontoKnightwasnowitsownenemy。

Clingingtohimsodependently，shetaughthimintimetopresumeuponthatdevotion——alessonmenarenotslowtolearn。Aslightrebelliousnessoccasionallywouldhavedonehimnoharm，andwouldhavebeenaworldofadvantagetoher。Butsheidolizedhim，andwasproudtobehisbond-servant。

ChapterXXXI

\'Awormi\'thebud。\'

Onedaythereviewersaid，\'Letusgotothecliffsagain，Elfride；\'and，withoutconsultingherwishes，hemovedasiftostartatonce。

\'Thecliffofourdreadfuladventure？\'sheinquired，withashudder。\'Deathstaresmeinthefaceinthepersonofthatcliff。\'

Nevertheless，soentirelyhadshesunkherindividualityinhisthattheremarkwasnotutteredasanexpostulation，andsheimmediatelypreparedtoaccompanyhim。

\'No，notthatplace，\'saidKnight。\'Itisghastlytome，too。

Thatother，Imean；whatisitsname？——WindyBeak。\'

WindyBeakwasthesecondcliffinheightalongthatcoast，and，asisfrequentlythecasewiththenaturalfeaturesoftheglobenolessthanwiththeintellectualfeaturesofmen，itenjoyedthereputationofbeingthefirst。Moreover，itwastheclifftowhichElfridehadriddenwithStephenSmith，onawell-rememberedmorningofhissummervisit。

So，thoughthoughtoftheformercliffhadcausedhertoshudderattheperilstowhichherloverandherselfhadtherebeenexposed，bybeingassociatedwithKnightonlyitwasnotsoobjectionableasWindyBeak。Thatplacewasworsethangloomy，itwasaperpetualreproachtoher。

Butnotlikingtorefuse，shesaid，\'Itisfurtherthantheothercliff。\'

\'Yes；butyoucanride。\'

\'Andwillyoutoo？\'

\'No，I\'llwalk。\'

AduplicateofheroriginalarrangementwithStephen。Somefatalitymustbehangingoverherhead。Butsheceasedobjecting。

\'Verywell，Harry，I\'llride，\'shesaidmeekly。

Aquarterofanhourlatershewasinthesaddle。Buthowdifferentthemoodfromthatoftheformertime。Shehad，indeed，givenupherpositionasqueenofthelesstobevassalofthegreater。Herewasnoshowingoffnow；noscamperingoutofsightwithPansy，toperplexandtirehercompanion；nosaucyremarksonLABELLEDAMESANSMERCI。Elfridewasburdenedwiththeveryintensityofherlove。

Knightdidmostofthetalkingalongthejourney。Elfridesilentlylistened，andentirelyresignedherselftothemotionsoftheamblinghorseuponwhichshesat，alternatelyrisingandsinkinggently，likeaseabirduponaseawave。

Whentheyhadreachedthelimitofaquadruped\'spossibilitiesinwalking，Knighttenderlyliftedherfromthesaddle，tiedthehorse，andrambledonwithhertotheseatintherock。Knightsatdown，anddrewElfridedeftlybesidehim，andtheylookedoverthesea。

Twoorthreedegreesabovethatmelancholyandeternallylevelline，theoceanhorizon，hungasunofbrass，withnovisiblerays，inaskyofashenhue。Itwasaskythesundidnotilluminateorenkindle，asisusualatsunsets。Thissheetofskywasmetbythesaltmassofgraywater，fleckedhereandtherewithwhite。Awaftofdampnessoccasionallyrosetotheirfaces，whichwasprobablyrarefiedsprayfromtheblowsoftheseauponthefootofthecliff。

ElfridewisheditcouldbealongertimeagothatshehadsattherewithStephenasherlover，andagreedtobehiswife。Thesignificantclosenessofthattimetothepresentwasanotheritemtoaddtothelistofpassionatefearswhichwerechronicwithhernow。

YetKnightwasverytenderthisevening，andsustainedherclosetohimastheysat。

Notawordhadbeenutteredbyeithersincesittingdown，whenKnightsaidmusingly，lookingstillafar——

\'Iwonderifanyloversinpastyearseversatherewitharmslocked，aswedonow。Probablytheyhave，fortheplaceseemsformedforaseat。\'

Herrecollectionofawell-knownpairwhohad，andthemuch-

talked-oflosswhichhadensuedtherefrom，andhowtheyoungmanhadbeensentbacktolookforthemissingarticle，ledElfridetoglancedowntoherside，andbehindherback。Manypeoplewholoseatrinketinvoluntarilygiveamomentarylookforitinpassingthespoteversolongafterwards。Theydonotoftenfindit。Elfride，inturningherhead，sawsomethingshineweaklyfromacreviceintherockysedile。Onlyforafewminutesduringthedaydidthesunlightthealcovetoitsinnermostriftsandslits，buttheseweretheminutesnow，anditslevelraysdidElfridethegoodorevilturnofrevealingthelostornament。

Elfride\'sthoughtsinstantlyrevertedtothewordsshehadunintentionallyuttereduponwhathadbeengoingonwhentheearringwaslost。AndshewasimmediatelyseizedwithamisgivingthatKnight，onseeingtheobject，wouldberemindedofherwords。

Herinstinctiveactthereforewastosecureitprivately。

ItwassodeepinthecrackthatElfridecouldnotpullitoutwithherhand，thoughshemadeseveralsurreptitioustrials。

\'Whatareyoudoing，Elfie？\'saidKnight，noticingherattempts，andlookingbehindhimlikewise。

Shehadrelinquishedtheendeavour，buttoolate。

Knightpeeredintothejointfromwhichherhandhadbeenwithdrawn，andsawwhatshehadseen。Heinstantlytookapenknifefromhispocket，andbydintofprobingandscrapingbroughttheearringoutuponopenground。

\'Itisnotyours，surely？\'heinquired。

\'Yes，itis，\'shesaidquietly。

\'Well，thatisamostextraordinarything，thatweshouldfinditlikethis!\'Knightthenrememberedmorecircumstances；\'What，isittheoneyouhavetoldmeof？\'

\'Yes。\'

Theunfortunateremarkofhersatthekisscameintohismind，ifeyeswereeveranindextobetrusted。Tryingtorepressthewordsheyetspokeonthesubject，moretoobtainassurancethatwhatithadseemedtoimplywasnottruethanfromawishtopryintobygones。

\'Wereyoureallyengagedtobemarriedtothatlover？\'hesaid，lookingstraightforwardattheseaagain。

\'Yes——butnotexactly。YetIthinkIwas。\'

\'OElfride，engagedtobemarried!\'hemurmured。

\'Itwouldhavebeencalleda——secretengagement，Isuppose。Butdon\'tlooksodisappointed；don\'tblameme。\'

\'No，no。\'

\'Whydoyousay"No，no，"insuchaway？Sweetlyenough，butsobarely？\'

Knightmadenodirectreplytothis。\'Elfride，Itoldyouonce，\'

hesaid，followingouthisthoughts，\'thatIneverkissedawomanasasweetheartuntilIkissedyou。Akissisnotmuch，I

suppose，andithappenstofewyoungpeopletobeabletoavoidallblandishmentsandattentionsexceptfromtheonetheyafterwardsmarry。ButIhavepeculiarweaknesses，Elfride；andbecauseIhaveledapeculiarlife，Imustsufferforit，I

suppose。Ihadhoped——well，whatIhadnorighttohopeinconnectionwithyou。Younaturallygrantedyourformerlovertheprivilegesyougrantme。\'

A\'yes\'camefromherlikethelastsadwhisperofabreeze。

\'Andheusedtokissyou——ofcoursehedid。\'

\'Yes。\'

\'Andperhapsyouallowedhimamorefreemannerinhislove-makingthanIhaveshowninmine。\'

\'No，Ididnot。\'Thiswasrathermorealertlyspoken。

\'Butheadopteditwithoutbeingallowed？\'

\'Yes。\'

\'HowmuchIhavemadeofyou，Elfride，andhowIhavekeptaloof!\'

saidKnightindeepandshakentones。\'SomanydaysandhoursasIhavehopedinyou——Ihavefearedtokissyoumorethanthosetwotimes。Andhemadenoscruplesto……\'

Shecreptclosertohimandtrembledasifwithcold。Herdreadthatthewholestory，withrandomadditions，wouldbecomeknowntohim，causedhermannertobesoagitatedthatKnightwasalarmedandperplexedintostillness。Theactualinnocencewhichmadeherthinksofearfullyofwhat，astheworldgoes，wasnotagreatmatter，magnifiedherapparentguilt。ItmayhavesaidtoKnightthatawomanwhowassoflurriedinthepreliminariesmusthaveadreadfulsequeltohertale。

\'Iknow，\'continuedKnight，withanindescribabledragofmannerandintonation，——\'IknowIamabsurdlyscrupulousaboutyou——thatIwantyoutooexclusivelymine。Inyourpastbeforeyouknewme——

fromyourverycradle——Iwantedtothinkyouhadbeenmine。I

wouldmakeyouminebymainforce。Elfride，\'hewentonvehemently，\'Ican\'thelpthisjealousyoveryou!Itismynature，andmustbeso，andIHATEthefactthatyouhavebeencaressedbefore:yeshateit!\'

Shedrewalongdeepbreath，whichwashalfasob。Knight\'sfacewashard，andheneverlookedatheratall，stillfixinghisgazefarouttosea，whichthesunhadnowresignedtotheshade。Inhighplacesitisnotlongfromsunsettonight，duskbeinginameasurebanished，andthoughonlyeveningwheretheysat，ithadbeentwilightinthevalleysforhalfanhour。Uponthedullexpanseofseatheregraduallyintensifieditselfintoexistencethegleamofadistantlight-ship。

\'Whenthatloverfirstkissedyou，Elfridewasitinsuchaplaceasthis？\'

\'Yes，itwas。\'

\'Youdon\'ttellmeanythingbutwhatIwringoutofyou。Whyisthat？Whyhaveyousuppressedallmentionofthiswhencasualconfidencesofmineshouldhavesuggestedconfidenceinreturn？OnboardtheJuliet，whywereyousosecret？Itseemslikebeingmadeafoolof，Elfride，tothinkthat，whenIwasteachingyouhowdesirableitwasthatweshouldhavenosecretsfromeachother，youwereassentinginwords，butinactcontradictingme。

Confidencewouldhavebeensomuchmorepromisingforourhappiness。Ifyouhadhadconfidenceinme，andtoldmewillingly，Ishould——bedifferent。Butyousuppresseverything，andIshallquestionyou。DidyouliveatEndelstowatthattime？\'

\'Yes，\'shesaidfaintly。

\'Wherewereyouwhenhefirstkissedyou？\'

\'Sittinginthisseat。\'

\'Ah，Ithoughtso!\'saidKnight，risingandfacingher。

\'Andthataccountsforeverything——theexclamationwhichyouexplaineddeceitfully，andall!Forgivetheharshword，Elfride——

forgiveit。\'Hesmiledasurfacesmileashecontinued:\'WhatapoormortalIamtoplaysecondfiddleineverythingandtobedeludedbyfibs!\'

\'Oh，don\'tsayit；don\'t，Harry!\'

\'Wheredidhekissyoubesideshere？\'

\'Sittingon——atombinthe——churchyard——andotherplaces，\'sheansweredwithslowrecklessness。

\'Nevermind，nevermind，\'heexclaimed，onseeinghertearsandperturbation。\'Idon\'twanttogrieveyou。Idon\'tcare。\'

ButKnightdidcare。

\'Itmakesnodifference，youknow，\'hecontinued，seeingshedidnotreply。

\'Ifeelcold，\'saidElfride。\'Shallwegohome？\'

\'Yes；itislateintheyeartositlongoutofdoors:weoughttobeoffthisledgebeforeitgetstoodarktoletusseeourfooting。Idaresaythehorseisimpatient。\'

Knightspokethemerestcommonplacetohernow。Hehadhopedtothelastmomentthatshewouldhavevolunteeredthewholestoryofherfirstattachment。Itgrewmoreandmoredistastefultohimthatsheshouldhaveasecretofthisnature。Suchentireconfidenceashehadpicturedasabouttoexistbetweenhimselfandtheinnocentyoungwifewhohadknownnolover\'stonessavehis——wasthisitsbeginning？Heliftedheruponthehorse，andtheywentalongconstrainedly。Thepoisonofsuspicionwasdoingitsworkwell。

Anincidentoccurredonthishomewardjourneywhichwaslongrememberedbyboth，asaddingshadetoshadow。KnightcouldnotkeepfromhismindthewordsofAdam\'sreproachtoEveinPARADISE

LOST，andatlastwhisperedthemtohimself——

\'Fool\'dandbeguiled:byhimthou，Ibythee!\'

\'Whatdidyousay？\'Elfrideinquiredtimorously。

\'Itwasonlyaquotation。\'

Theyhadnowdroppedintoahollow，andthechurchtowermadeitsappearanceagainstthepaleeveningsky，itslowerpartbeinghiddenbysomeinterveningtrees。Elfride，beingdeniedananswer，waslookingatthetowerandtryingtothinkofsomecontrastingquotationshemightusetoregainhistenderness。

Afteralittlethoughtshesaidinwinningtones——

"Thouhastbeenmyhope，andastrongtowerformeagainsttheenemy。”\'

Theypassedon。Afewminuteslaterthreeorfourbirdswereseentoflyoutofthetower。

\'Thestrongtowermoves，\'saidKnight，withsurprise。

Acornerofthesquaremassswayedforward，sank，andvanished。A

loudrumblefollowed，andacloudofdustarosewhereallhadpreviouslybeensoclear。

\'Thechurchrestorershavedoneit!\'saidElfride。

AtthisminuteMr。Swancourtwasseenapproachingthem。Hecameupwithabustlingdemeanour，apparentlymuchengrossedbysomebusinessinhand。

\'Wehavegotthetowerdown!\'heexclaimed。\'Itcameratherquickerthanweintendeditshould。Thefirstideawastotakeitdownstonebystone，youknow。Indoingthisthecrackwidenedconsiderably，anditwasnotbelievedsafeforthementostanduponthewallsanylonger。Thenwedecidedtoundermineit，andthreemensettoworkattheweakestcornerthisafternoon。Theyhadleftofffortheevening，intendingtogivethefinalblowto-

morrowmorning，andhadbeenhomeabouthalfanhour，whendownitcame。Averysuccessfuljob——averyfinejobindeed。Buthewasatougholdfellowinspiteofthecrack。\'HereMr。Swancourtwipedfromhisfacetheperspirationhisexcitementhadcausedhim。

\'Pooroldtower!\'saidElfride。

\'Yes，Iamsorryforit，\'saidKnight。\'Itwasaninterestingpieceofantiquity——alocalrecordoflocalart。\'

\'Ah，butmydearsir，weshallhaveanewone，expostulatedMr。

Swancourt；\'asplendidtower——designedbyafirst-rateLondonman——

intheneweststyleofGothicart，andfullofChristianfeeling。\'

\'Indeed!\'saidKnight。

\'Ohyes。Notinthebarbarousclumsyarchitectureofthisneighbourhood；youseenothingsoroughandpagananywhereelseinEngland。Whenthemenaregone，Iwouldadviseyoutogoandseethechurchbeforeanythingfurtherisdonetoit。Youcannowsitinthechancel，andlookdownthenavethroughthewestarch，andthroughthatfarouttosea。Infact，\'saidMr。Swancourtsignificantly，\'ifaweddingwereperformedatthealtarto-morrowmorning，itmightbewitnessedfromthedeckofashiponavoyagetotheSouthSeas，withagoodglass。However，afterdinner，whenthemoonhasrisen，goupandseeforyourselves。\'

Knightassentedwithfeverishreadiness。HehaddecidedwithinthelastfewminutesthathecouldnotrestanothernightwithoutfurthertalkwithElfrideuponthesubjectwhichnowdividedthem:

hewasdeterminedtoknowall，andrelievehisdisquietinsomeway。Elfridewouldgladlyhaveescapedfurtherconversealonewithhimthatnight，butitseemedinevitable。

Justaftermoonrisetheyleftthehouse。Howlittleanyexpectationofthemoonlightprospect——whichwastheostensiblereasonoftheirpilgrimage——hadtodowithKnight\'srealmotiveingettingthegentlegirlagainuponhisarm，Elfridenolessthanhimselfwellknew。

ChapterXXXII

\'HadIwistbeforeIkist\'

ItwasnowOctober，andthenightairwaschill。Afterlookingtoseethatshewaswellwrappedup，Knighttookheralongthehillsidepaththeyhadascendedsomanytimesineachother\'scompany，whendoubtwasathingunknown。Onreachingthechurchtheyfoundthatonesideofthetowerwas，asthevicarhadstated，entirelyremoved，andlyingintheshapeofrubbishattheirfeet。Thetoweronitseasternsidestillwasfirm，andmighthavewithstoodtheshockofstormsandthesiegeofbatteringyearsformanyagenerationevennow。Theyenteredbytheside-door，wenteastward，andsatdownbythealtar-steps。

Theheavyarchspanningthejunctionoftowerandnaveformedto-

nightablackframetoadistantmistyview，stretchingfarwestward。Justoutsidethearchcametheheapoffallenstones，thenaportionofmoonlitchurchyard，thenthewideandconvexseabehind。Itwasacoup-d\'oeilwhichhadneverbeenpossiblesincethemediaevalmasonsfirstattachedtheoldtowertotheolderchurchitdignified，andhencemustbesupposedtohavehadaninterestapartfromthatofsimplemoonlightonancientwallandseaandshore——anymentionofwhichhasbythistime，itistobefeared，becomeoneofthecuckoo-crieswhichareheardbutnotregarded。Raysofcrimson，blue，andpurpleshoneuponthetwainfromtheeastwindowbehindthem，whereinsaintsandangelsviedwitheachotherinprimitivesurroundingsoflandscapeandsky，andthrewuponthepavementatthesitters\'feetasofterreproductionofthesametranslucenthues，amidwhichtheshadowsofthetwolivingheadsofKnightandElfridewereopaqueandprominentblots。Presentlythemoonbecamecoveredbyacloud，andtheiridescencediedaway。

\'There，itisgone!\'saidKnight。\'I\'vebeenthinking，Elfride，thatthisplacewesitoniswherewemayhopetokneeltogethersoon。ButIamrestlessanduneasy，andyouknowwhy。\'

Beforesherepliedthemoonlightreturnedagain，irradiatingthatportionofchurchyardwithintheirview。Itbrightenedthenearpartfirst，andagainstthebackgroundwhichthecloud-shadowhadnotyetuncoveredstood，brightestofall，awhitetomb——thetombofyoungJethway。

Knight，stillaliveonthesubjectofElfride\'ssecret，thoughtofherwordsconcerningthekissthatitoncehadoccurredonatombinthischurchyard。

\'Elfride，\'hesaid，withasuperficialarchnesswhichdidnothalfcoveranundercurrentofreproach，\'doyouknow，Ithinkyoumighthavetoldmevoluntarilyaboutthatpast——ofkissesandbetrothing——withoutgivingmesomuchuneasinessandtrouble。Wasthatthetombyoualludedtoashavingsatonwithhim？\'

Shewaitedaninstant。\'Yes，\'shesaid。

ThecorrectnessofhisrandomshotstartledKnight；though，consideringthatalmostalltheothermemorialsinthechurchyardwereuprightheadstonesuponwhichnobodycouldpossiblysit，itwasnotsowonderful。

Elfridedidnotevennowgoonwiththeexplanationherexactingloverwishedtohave，andherreticencebegantoirritatehimasbefore。Hewasinclinedtoreadheralecture。

\'Whydon\'tyoutellmeall？\'hesaidsomewhatindignantly。

\'Elfride，thereisnotasinglesubjectuponwhichIfeelmorestronglythanuponthis——thateverythingoughttobeclearedupbetweentwopersonsbeforetheybecomehusbandandwife。Seehowdesirableandwisesuchacourseis，inordertoavoiddisagreeablecontingenciesintheformofdiscoveriesafterwards。

For，Elfride，asecretofnoimportanceatallmaybemadethebasisofsomefatalmisunderstandingonlybecauseitisdiscovered，andnotconfessed。Theysaythereneverwasacoupleofwhomonehadnotsomesecrettheotherneverkneworwasintendedtoknow。Thismayormaynotbetrue；butifitbetrue，somehavebeenhappyinspiteratherthaninconsequenceofit。

Ifamanweretoseeanothermanlookingsignificantlyathiswife，andshewereblushingcrimsonandappearingstartled，doyouthinkhewouldbesowellsatisfiedwith，forinstance，hertruthfulexplanationthatonce，tohergreatannoyance，sheaccidentallyfaintedintohisarms，asifshehadsaiditvoluntarilylongago，beforethecircumstanceoccurredwhichforceditfromher？Supposethatadmireryouspokeofinconnectionwiththetombyondershouldturnup，andbotherme。Itwouldembitterourlives，ifIwerethenhalfinthedark，asIamnow!\'

Knightspokethelattersentenceswithgrowingforce。

\'Itcannotbe，\'shesaid。

\'Whynot？\'heaskedsharply。

Elfridewasdistressedtofindhiminsosternamood，andshetrembled。Inaconfusionofideas，probablynotintendingawilfulprevarication，sheansweredhurriedly——

\'Ifhe\'sdead，howcanyoumeethim？\'

\'Ishedead？Oh，that\'sdifferentaltogether!\'saidKnight，immenselyrelieved。\'But，letmesee——whatdidyousayaboutthattombandhim？\'

\'That\'shistomb，\'shecontinuedfaintly。

\'What!washewholiesburiedtherethemanwhowasyourlover？\'

Knightaskedinadistinctvoice。

\'Yes；andIdidn\'tlovehimorencouragehim。\'

\'Butyoulethimkissyou——yousaidso，youknow，Elfride。\'

Shemadenoreply。

\'Why，\'saidKnight，recollectingcircumstancesbydegrees，\'yousurelysaidyouwereinsomedegreeengagedtohim——andofcourseyouwereifhekissedyou。Andnowyousayyouneverencouragedhim。AndIhavebeenfancyingyousaid——Iamalmostsureyoudid——

thatyouweresittingwithhimONthattomb。GoodGod!\'hecried，suddenlystartingupinanger，\'areyoutellingmeuntruths？Whyshouldyouplaywithmelikethis？I\'llhavetherightofit。Elfride，weshallneverbehappy!There\'sablightuponus，orme，oryou，anditmustbeclearedoffbeforewemarry。\'Knightmovedawayimpetuouslyasiftoleaveher。

Shejumpedupandclutchedhisarm\'Don\'tgo，Harry——don\'t!

\'Tellme，then，\'saidKnightsternly。\'Andrememberthis，nomorefibs，or，uponmysoul，Ishallhateyou。Heavens!thatIshouldcometothis，tobemadeafoolofbyagirl\'suntruths——\'

\'Don\'t，don\'ttreatmesocruelly!OHarry，Harry，havepity，andwithdrawthosedreadfulwords!Iamtruthfulbynature——Iam——andIdon\'tknowhowIcametomakeyoumisunderstand!ButIwasfrightened!\'Shequiveredsoinherperturbationthatsheshookhimwithher{Note:sentenceincompleteintext。}

\'Didyousayyouweresittingonthattomb？\'heaskedmoodily。

\'Yes；anditwastrue。\'

\'Thenhow，inthenameofHeaven，canamansituponhisowntomb？\'

\'Thatwasanotherman。Forgiveme，Harry，won\'tyou？\'

\'What，aloverinthetombandaloveronit？\'

\'Oh——Oh——yes!\'

\'Thenthereweretwobeforeme？

\'I——supposeso。\'

\'Now，don\'tbeasillywomanwithyoursupposing——Ihateallthat，\'saidKnightcontemptuouslyalmost。\'Well，welearnstrangethings。Idon\'tknowwhatImighthavedone——nomancansayintowhatshapecircumstancesmaywarphim——butIhardlythinkIshouldhavehadtheconsciencetoacceptthefavoursofanewloverwhilstsittingoverthepoorremainsoftheoldone；uponmysoul，Idon\'t。\'Knight，inmoodymeditation，continuedlookingtowardsthetomb，whichstoodstaringtheminthefacelikeanavengingghost。

\'Butyouwrongme——Oh，sogrievously!"shecried。\'Ididnotmeditateanysuchthing:believeme，Harry，Ididnot。Itonlyhappenedso——quiteofitself。\'

\'Well，Isupposeyoudidn\'tINTENDsuchathing，\'hesaid。

\'Nobodyeverdoes，\'hesadlycontinued。

\'AndhiminthegraveIneveronceloved。\'

\'Isupposethesecondloverandyou，asyousatthere，vowedtobefaithfultoeachotherforever？\'

Elfrideonlyrepliedbyquickheavybreaths，showingshewasonthebrinkofasob。

\'Youdon\'tchoosetobeanythingbutreserved，then？\'hesaidimperatively。

\'Ofcoursewedid，\'sheresponded。

\'"Ofcourse!"Youseemtotreatthesubjectverylightly？\'

\'Itispast，andisnothingtousnow。\'

\'Elfride，itisanothingwhich，thoughitmaymakeacarelessmanlaugh，cannotbutmakeagenuineonegrieve。Itisaverygnawingpain。Tellmestraightthrough——allofit。\'

\'Never。OHarry!howcanyouexpectitwhensolittleofitmakesyousoharshwithme？\'

\'Now，Elfride，listentothis。Youknowthatwhatyouhavetoldonlyjarsthesubtlerfanciesinone，afterall。ThefeelingI

haveaboutitwouldbecalled，andis，meresentimentality；andI

don\'twantyoutosupposethatanordinarypreviousengagementofastraightforwardkindwouldmakeanypracticaldifferenceinmylove，ormywishtomakeyoumywife。Butyouseemtohavemoretotell，andthat\'swherethewrongis。Istheremore？\'

\'Notmuchmore，\'shewearilyanswered。

Knightpreservedagravesilenceforaminute。\'"Notmuchmore，"\'

hesaidatlast。\'Ishouldthinknot，indeed!\'Hisvoiceassumedalowandsteadypitch。\'Elfride，youmustnotmindmysayingastrange-soundingthing，forsayitIshall。Itisthis:thatifthereWEREmuchmoretoaddtoanaccountwhichalreadyincludesalltheparticularsthatabrokenmarriageengagementcouldpossiblyincludewithpropriety，itmustbesomeexceptionalthingwhichmightmakeitimpossibleformeoranyoneelsetoloveyouandmarryyou。\'

Knight\'sdisturbedmoodledhimmuchfurtherthanhewouldhavegoneinaquietermoment。And，evenasitwas，hadshebeenassertivetoanydegreehewouldnothavebeensoperemptory；andhadshebeenastrongercharacter——morepracticalandlessimaginative——shewouldhavemademoreuseofherpositioninhishearttoinfluencehim。Buttheconfidingtendernesswhichhadwonhimiseveraccompaniedbyasortofself-committaltothestreamofevents，leadingeverysuchwomantotrustmoretothekindnessoffateforgoodresultsthantoanyargumentofherown。

\'Well，well，\'hemurmuredcynically；\'Iwon\'tsayitisyourfault:itismyill-luck，Isuppose。Ihadnorealrighttoquestionyou——everybodywouldsayitwaspresuming。Butwhenwehavemisunderstood，wefeelinjuredbythesubjectofourmisunderstanding。Youneversaidyouhadhadnobodyelseheremakinglovetoyou，sowhyshouldIblameyou？Elfride，Ibegyourpardon。\'

\'No，no!Iwouldratherhaveyourangerthanthatcoolaggrievedpoliteness。Dodropthat，Harry!Whyshouldyouinflictthatuponme？Itreducesmetothelevelofamereacquaintance。\'

\'Youdothatwithme。Whynotconfidenceforconfidence？\'

\'Yes；butIdidn\'taskyouasinglequestionwithregardtoyourpast:Ididn\'twishtoknowaboutit。AllIcaredforwasthat，whereveryoucamefrom，whateveryouhaddone，whoeveryouhadloved，youweremineatlast。Harry，iforiginallyyouhadknownIhadloved，wouldyouneverhavecaredforme？\'

\'Iwon\'tquitesaythat。ThoughIownthattheideaofyourinexperiencedstatehadagreatcharmforme。ButIthinkthis:

thatifIhadknowntherewasanyphaseofyourpastloveyouwouldrefusetorevealifIaskedtoknowit，Ishouldneverhavelovedyou。\'

Elfridesobbedbitterly。\'AmIsucha——merecharacterlesstoy——astohavenoattrac——tioninme，apartfrom——freshness？Haven\'tI

brains？Yousaid——Iwascleverandingeniousinmythoughts，and——

isn\'tthatanything？HaveInotsomebeauty？IthinkIhavealittle——andIknowIhave——yes，Ido!Youhavepraisedmyvoice，andmymanner，andmyaccomplishments。YetallthesetogetheraresomuchrubbishbecauseI——accidentallysawamanbeforeyou!\'

\'Oh，come，Elfride。"Accidentallysawaman"isverycool。Youlovedhim，remember。\'——

\'Andlovedhimalittle!\'

\'Andrefusenowtoanswerthesimplequestionhowitended。Doyourefusestill，Elfride？\'

\'Youhavenorighttoquestionmeso——yousaidso。Itisunfair。

TrustmeasItrustyou。\'

\'That\'snotatall。\'

\'Ishallnotloveyouifyouaresocruel。Itiscrueltometoarguelikethis。\'

\'Perhapsitis。Yes，itis。Iwascarriedawaybymyfeelingforyou。HeavenknowsthatIdidn\'tmeanto；butIhavelovedyousothatIhaveusedyoubadly。\'

\'Idon\'tmindit，Harry!\'sheinstantlyanswered，creepingupandnestlingagainsthim；\'andIwillnotthinkatallthatyouusedmeharshlyifyouwillforgiveme，andnotbevexedwithmeanymore？IdowishIhadbeenexactlyasyouthoughtIwas，butI

couldnothelpit，youknow。IfIhadonlyknownyouhadbeencoming，whatanunneryIwouldhavelivedintohavebeengoodenoughforyou!\'

\'Well，nevermind，\'saidKnight；andheturnedtogo。Heendeavouredtospeaksportivelyastheywenton。\'DiogenesLaertiussaysthatphilosophersusedvoluntarilytodeprivethemselvesofsighttobeuninterruptedintheirmeditations。

Men，becominglovers，oughttodothesamething。\'

\'Why？——butnevermind——Idon\'twanttoknow。Don\'tspeaklaconicallytome，\'shesaidwithdeprecation。

\'Why？Becausetheywouldneverthenbedistractedbydiscoveringtheiridolwassecond-hand。\'