第20章

AllthroughthesemeditationsrantheundercurrentofanabsolutetrustinSophyViner。Shethoughtofthegirlwithaminglingofantipathyandconfidence。Itwashumiliatingtoherpridetorecognizekindredimpulsesinacharacterwhichshewouldhavelikedtofeelcompletelyalientoher。

Butwhatindeedwasthegirlreallylike？Sheseemedtohavenoscruplesandathousanddelicacies。ShehadgivenherselftoDarrow，andconcealedtheepisodefromOwenLeath，withnomoreapparentsenseofdebasementthanthevulgarestofadventuresses；yetshehadinstantlyobeyedthevoiceofherheartwhenitbadeherpartfromtheoneandservetheother。

Annatriedtopicturewhatthegirl’slifemusthavebeen：

whatexperiences，whatinitiations，hadformedher。Butherowntraininghadbeentoodifferent：therewereveilsshecouldnotlift。Shelookedbackathermarriedlife，anditscolourlessuniformitytookonanairofhighrestraintandorder。Wasitbecauseshehadbeensoincuriousthatithadwornthatlooktoher？Itstruckherwithamazementthatshehadnevergivenathoughttoherhusband’spast，orwonderedwhathedidandwherehewentwhenhewasawayfromher。Ifshehadbeenaskedwhatshesupposedhethoughtaboutwhentheywereapart，shewouldinstantlyhaveanswered：hissnuff—boxes。Ithadneveroccurredtoherthathemighthavepassions，interests，preoccupationsofwhichshewasabsolutelyignorant。YethewentuptoParisratherregularly：ostensiblytoattendsalesandexhibitions，ortoconferwithdealersandcollectors。Shetriedtopicturehim，straight，trim，beautifullybrushedandvarnished，walkingfurtivelydownaquietstreet，andlookingabouthimbeforeheslippedintoadoorway。Sheunderstoodnowthatshehadbeencoldtohim：whatmorelikelythanthathehadsoughtcompensations？Allmenwerelikethat，shesupposed——nodoubthersimplicityhadamusedhim。

IntheactoftransposingFraserLeathintoaDonJuanshewaspulledupbytheironicperceptionthatshewassimplytryingtojustifyDarrow。Shewantedtothinkthatallmenwere"likethat"becauseDarrowwas"likethat"：shewantedtojustifyheracceptanceofthefactbypersuadingherselfthatonlythroughsuchconcessionscouldwomenlikeherselfhopetokeepwhattheycouldnotgiveup。Andsuddenlyshewasfilledwithangeratherblindness，andthenatherdisastrousattempttosee。WhyhadsheforcedthetruthoutofDarrow？Ifonlyshehadheldhertonguenothingneedeverhavebeenknown。SophyVinerwouldhavebrokenherengagement，Owenwouldhavebeensentaroundtheworld，andherowndreamwouldhavebeenunshattered。Butshehadprobed，insisted，cross—examined，notrestedtillshehaddraggedthesecrettothelight。Shewasoneofthelucklesswomenwhoalwayshavethewrongaudacities，andwhoalwaysknowit……

Wasitshe，AnnaLeath，whowaspicturingherselftoherselfinthatway？Sherecoiledfromherthoughtsasifwithasenseofdemoniacpossession，andthereflashedthroughherthelongingtoreturntoheroldstateoffearlessignorance。IfatthatmomentshecouldhavekeptDarrowfromfollowinghertoGivreshewouldhavedoneso……

Buthecame；andwiththesightofhimtheturmoilfellandshefeltherselfreassured，rehabilitated。Hearrivedtowarddusk，andshemotoredtoFrancheuiltomeethim。Shewantedtoseehimassoonaspossible，forshehaddivined，throughthenewinsightthatwasinher，thatonlyhispresencecouldrestorehertoanormalviewofthings。Inthemotor，astheyleftthetownandturnedintothehigh—

road，heliftedherhandandkissedit，andsheleanedagainsthim，andfeltthecurrentsflowbetweenthem。Shewasgratefultohimfornotsayinganything，andfornotexpectinghertospeak。Shesaidtoherself："Henevermakesamistake——healwaysknowswhattodo"；andthenshethoughtwithastartthatitwasdoubtlessbecausehehadsooftenbeeninsuchsituations。Theideathathistactwasakindofprofessionalexpertnessfilledherwithrepugnance，andinsensiblyshedrewawayfromhim。Hemadenomotiontobringhernearer，andsheinstantlythoughtthatthatwascalculatedtoo。Shesatbesidehiminfrozenmisery，wonderingwhether，henceforth，shewouldmeasureinthiswayhiseverylookandgesture。Neitherofthemspokeagaintillthemotorturnedunderthedarkarchoftheavenue，andtheysawthelightsofGivretwinklingatitsend。ThenDarrowlaidhishandonhersandsaid："Iknow，dear——"andthehardnessinhermelted。"He’ssufferingasIam，"shethought；andforamomentthebalefulfactbetweenthemseemedtodrawthemcloserinsteadofwallingthemupintheirseparatewretchedness。

Itwaswonderfultobeoncemorere—enteringthedoorsofGivrewithhim，andastheoldhousereceivedthemintoitsmellowsilenceshehadagainthesenseofpassingoutofadreadfuldreamintothereassuranceofkindlyandfamiliarthings。Itdidnotseempossiblethatthesequietrooms，sofulloftheslowly—distilledaccumulationsofafastidioustaste，shouldhavebeenthesceneoftragicdissensions。

Thememoryofthemseemedtobeshutoutintothenightwiththeclosingandbarringofitsdoors。

Atthetea—tableintheoak—roomtheyfoundMadamedeChantelleandEffie。Thelittlegirl，catchingsightofDarrow，raceddownthedrawing—roomstomeethim，andreturnedintriumphonhisshoulder。Annalookedatthemwithasmile。Effie，forallhergraces，wascharyofsuchfavours，andhermotherknewthatinaccordingthemtoDarrowshehadadmittedhimtothecirclewhereOwenhadhithertoruled。

Overthetea—tableDarrowgaveMadamedeChantelletheexplanationofhissuddenreturnfromEngland。OnreachingLondon，hetoldher，hehadfoundthatthesecretaryhewastohavereplacedwasdetainedtherebytheillnessofhiswife。TheAmbassador，knowingDarrow’surgentreasonsforwishingtobeinFrance，hadimmediatelyproposedhisgoingback，andawaitingatGivrethesummonstorelievehiscolleague；andhehadjumpedintothefirsttrain，withoutevenwaitingtotelegraphthenewsofhisrelease。Hespokenaturally，easily，inhisusualquietvoice，takinghisteafromEffie，helpinghimselftothetoastshehanded，andstoopingnowandthentostrokethedozingterrier。Andsuddenly，asAnnalistenedtohisexplanation，sheaskedherselfifitweretrue。

Thequestion，ofcourse，wasabsurd。Therewasnopossiblereasonwhyheshouldinventafalseaccountofhisreturn，andeveryprobabilitythattheversionhegavewastherealone。ButhehadlookedandspokeninthesamewaywhenhehadansweredherprobingquestionsaboutSophyViner，andshereflectedwithachilloffearthatshewouldneveragainknowifhewerespeakingthetruthornot。Shewassurehelovedher，andshedidnotfearhisinsincerityasmuchasherowndistrustofhim。Foramomentitseemedtoherthatthismustcorrupttheverysourceoflove；thenshesaidtoherself："Byandbye，whenIamaltogetherhis，weshallbesoneareachotherthattherewillbenoroomforanydoubtsbetweenus。"Butthedoubtsweretherenow，onemomentlulledtoquiescence，thenextmoretorturinglyalert。WhenthenurseappearedtosummonEffie，thelittlegirl，afterkissinghergrandmother，entrenchedherselfonDarrow’skneewiththeimperiousdemandtobecarrieduptobed；andAnna，whileshelaughinglyprotested，saidtoherselfwithapang："CanIgiveherafatheraboutwhomI

thinksuchthings？"

ThethoughtofEffie，andofwhatsheowedtoEffie，hadbeenthefundamentalreasonforherdelaysandhesitationswhensheandDarrowhadcometogetheragaininEngland。Herownfeelingwassoclearthatbutforthatscrupleshewouldhaveputherhandinhisatonce。Buttillshehadseenhimagainshehadneverconsideredthepossibilityofre—

marriage，andwhenitsuddenlyconfrontedheritseemed，forthemoment，todisorganizethelifeshehadplannedforherselfandherchild。ShehadnotspokenofthistoDarrowbecauseitappearedtoherasubjecttobedebatedwithinherownconscience。Thequestion，then，wasnotastohisfitnesstobecometheguideandguardianofherchild；nordidshefearthatherloveforhimwoulddepriveEffieoftheleastfractionofhertenderness，sinceshedidnotthinkofloveassomethingmeasuredandexhaustiblebutasatreasureperpetuallyrenewed。WhatshequestionedwasherrighttointroduceintoherlifeanyinterestsanddutieswhichmightrobEffieofapartofhertime，orlessentheclosenessoftheirdailyintercourse。

Shehaddecidedthisquestionasitwasinevitablethatsheshould；butnowanotherwasbeforeher。Assuredly，atherage，therewasnopossiblereasonwhysheshouldcloisterherselftobringupherdaughter；buttherewaseveryreasonfornotmarryingamaninwhomherownfaithwasnotcomplete……

XXXIV

Whenshewokethenextmorningshefeltagreatlightnessofheart。SherecalledherlastawakeningatGivre，threedaysbefore，whenithadseemedasthoughallherlifehadgonedownindarkness。NowDarrowwasoncemoreunderthesameroofwithher，andoncemorehisnearnesssufficedtomaketheloominghorrordropaway。Shecouldalmosthavesmiledatherscruplesofthenightbefore：asshelookedbackonthemtheyseemedtobelongtotheoldignoranttimoroustimewhenshehadfearedtolooklifeintheface，andhadbeenblindtothemysteriesandcontradictionsofthehumanheartbecauseherownhadnotbeenrevealedtoher。Darrowhadsaid："Youweremadetofeeleverything"；andtofeelwassurelybetterthantojudge。

Whenshecamedownstairshewasalreadyintheoak—roomwithEffieandMadamedeChantelle，andthesenseofreassurancewhichhispresencegaveherwasmergedinthereliefofnotbeingabletospeakofwhatwasbetweenthem。Butthereitwas，inevitably，andwhenevertheylookedateachothertheysawit。Inherdreadofgivingitamoretangibleshapeshetriedtodevisemeansofkeepingthelittlegirlwithher，and，whenthelatterhadbeencalledawaybythenurse，foundanexcuseforfollowingMadamedeChantelleupstairstothepurplesitting—room。ButaconfidentialtalkwithMadamedeChantelleimpliedthedetaileddiscussionofplansofwhichAnnacouldhardlyyetbeartoconsiderthevaguestoutline：thedateofhermarriage，therelativeadvantagesofsailingfromLondonorLisbon，thepossibilityofhiringahabitablehouseattheirnewpost；and，whentheseproblemswereexhausted，theapplicationofthesamemethodtothesubjectofOwen’sfuture。

Hisgrandmother，havingnosuspicionoftherealreasonofSophyViner’sdeparture，hadthoughtit"extremelysuitable"

oftheyounggirltowithdrawtotheshelterofheroldfriends’roofinthehourofbridalpreparation。ThismaidenlyretreathadinfactimpressedMadamedeChantellesofavourablythatshewasdisposedforthefirsttimetotalkoverOwen’sprojects；andaseveryhumaneventtranslateditselfforherintotermsofsocialanddomesticdetail，Annahadperforcetotravelthesameroundagain。

ShefeltamomentaryreliefwhenDarrowpresentlyjoinedthem；buthiscomingservedonlytodrawtheconversationbacktothequestionoftheirownfuture，andAnnafeltanewpangassheheardhimcalmlyandlucidlydiscussingit。

Didsuchself—possessionimplyindifferenceorinsincerity？

Inthatproblemhermindperpetuallyrevolved；andshedreadedtheoneanswerasmuchastheother。

Shewasresolvedtokeeponhercourseasthoughnothinghadhappened：tomarryDarrowandneverlettheconsciousnessofthepastintrudeitselfbetweenthem；butshewasbeginningtofeelthattheonlywayofattainingtothisstateofdetachmentfromtheirreparablewasonceforalltoturnbackwithhimtoitscontemplation。AssoonasthisdesirehadgerminateditbecamesostronginherthatsheregrettedhavingpromisedEffietotakeheroutfortheafternoon。

Butshecouldthinkofnopretextfordisappointingthelittlegirl，andsoonafterluncheonthethreesetforthinthemotortoshowDarrowachateaufamousintheannalsoftheregion。DuringtheirexcursionAnnafounditimpossibletoguessfromhisdemeanourifEffie’spresencebetweenthemwasasmuchofastraintohiscomposureastohers。Heremainedimperturbablygood—humouredandappreciativewhiletheywenttheroundofthemonument，andsheremarkedonlythatwhenhethoughthimselfunnoticedhisfacegrewgraveandhisanswerscamelesspromptly。

Onthewayback，twoorthreemilesfromGivre，shesuddenlyproposedthattheyshouldwalkhomethroughtheforestwhichskirtedthatsideofthepark。Darrowacquiesced，andtheygotoutandsentEffieoninthemotor。TheirwayledthroughabitofsoberFrenchwoodland，flatasafadedtapestry，butwithgleamsofliveemeraldlingeringhereandthereamongitsbrownsandochres。Theluminousgreyairgavevividnesstoitsdyingcolours，andveiledthedistantglimpsesofthelandscapeinsoftuncertainty。InsuchasolitudeAnnahadfancieditwouldbeeasiertospeak；butasshewalkedbesideDarrowoverthedeepsoundlessflooringofbrownmossthewordsonherlipstookflightagain。Itseemedimpossibletobreakthespellofquietjoywhichhispresencelaidonher，andwhenhebegantotalkoftheplacetheyhadjustvisitedsheansweredhisquestionsandthenwaitedforwhatheshouldsaynext……No，decidedlyshecouldnotspeak；shenolongerevenknewwhatshehadmeanttosay……

Thesameexperiencerepeateditselfseveraltimesthatdayandthenext。WhensheandDarrowwereapartsheexhaustedherselfinappealandinterrogation，sheformulatedwithaferventlucidityeverypointinherimaginaryargument。Butassoonasshewasalonewithhimsomethingdeeperthanreasonandsubtlerthanshynesslaiditsbenumbingtouchuponher，andthedesiretospeakbecamemerelyadimdisquietude，throughwhichhislooks，hiswords，histouch，reachedherasthroughamistofbodilypain。Yetthisinertiawastornbywildflashesofresistance，andwhentheywereapartshebegantoprepareagainwhatshemeanttosaytohim。

Sheknewhecouldnotbewithherwithoutbeingawareofthisinnerturmoil，andshehopedhewouldbreakthespellbysomereleasingword。Butshepresentlyunderstoodthatherecognizedthefutilityofwords，andwasresolutelybentonholdinghertoherownpurposeofbehavingasifnothinghadhappened。Oncemoresheinwardlyaccusedhimofinsensibility，andherimaginationwasbesetbytormentingvisionsofhispast……Hadsuchthingshappenedtohimbefore？Iftheepisodehadbeenanisolatedaccident——"amomentoffollyandmadness"，ashehadcalledit——shecouldunderstand，oratleastbegintounderstand（foratacertainpointherimaginationalwaysturnedback）；butifitwereamerelinkinachainofsimilarexperiments，thethoughtofitdishonouredherwholepast……

Effie，intheinterregnumbetweengovernesses，hadbeengivenleavetodinedownstairs；andAnna，ontheeveningofDarrow’sreturn，keptthelittlegirlwithhertilllongafterthenursehadsignalledfromthedrawing—roomdoor。

Whenatlengthshehadbeencarriedoff，Annaproposedagameofcards，andafterthisdiversionhaddrawntoitslanguidcloseshesaidgood—nighttoDarrowandfollowedMadamedeChantelleupstairs。ButMadamedeChantelleneversatuplate，andthesecondevening，withtheamiablyimpliedintentionofleavingAnnaandDarrowtothemselves，shetookanearlierleaveofthemthanusual。

Annasatsilent，listeningtohersmallstiffstepsastheyminceddownthehallanddiedoutinthedistance。MadamedeChantellehadbrokenherwoodenembroideryframe，andDarrow，havingofferedtorepairit，haddrawnhischairuptoatablethatheldalamp。Annawatchedhimashesatwithbentheadandknittedbrows，tryingtofittogetherthedisjoinedpieces。Thesightofhim，sotranquillyabsorbedinthistriflingbusiness，seemedtogivetothequietroomaperfumeofintimacy，tofillitwithasenseofsweetfamiliarhabit；anditcameoverheragainthatsheknewnothingoftheinnerthoughtsofthismanwhowassittingbyherasahusbandmight。Thelamplightfellonhiswhiteforehead，onthehealthybrownofhischeek，thebacksofhisthinsunburnthands。Asshewatchedthehandshersenseofthembecameasvividasatouch，andshesaidtoherself：

"ThatotherwomanhassatandwatchedhimasIamdoing。

ShehasknownhimasIhaveneverknownhim……Perhapsheisthinkingofthatnow。OrperhapshehasforgottenitallascompletelyasIhaveforgotteneverythingthathappenedtomebeforehecame……"

Helookedyoung，active，storedwithstrengthandenergy；

notthemanforvainrepiningsorlongmemories。Shewonderedwhatshehadtoholdorsatisfyhim。Helovedhernow；shehadnodoubtofthat；buthowcouldshehopetokeephim？Theyweresonearlyofanagethatalreadyshefeltherselfhissenior。Asyetthedifferencewasnotvisible；outwardlyatleasttheywerematched；butill—

healthorunhappinesswouldsoondoawaywiththisequality。

Shethoughtwithapangofbitterness："Hewon’tgrowanyolderbecausehedoesn’tfeelthings；andbecausehedoesn’t，ISHALL……"

Andwhensheceasedtopleasehim，whatthen？Hadhethetraditionoffaithtothespokenvow，orthedeeperpietyoftheunspokendedication？Whatwashistheory，whathisinnerconvictioninsuchmatters？Butwhatdidshecareforhisconvictionsorhistheories？Nodoubthelovedhernow，andbelievedhewouldalwaysgoonlovingher，andwaspersuadedthat，ifheceasedto，hisloyaltywouldbeproofagainstthechange。Whatshewantedtoknowwasnotwhathethoughtaboutitinadvance，butwhatwouldimpelorrestrainhimatthecrucialhour。Sheputnofaithinherownarts：shewastoosureofhavingnone！Andifsomebeneficentenchanterhadbestowedthemonher，sheknewnowthatshewouldhaverejectedthegift。Shecouldhardlyconceiveofwantingthekindoflovethatwasastateonecouldbecozenedinto……

Darrow，puttingawaytheframe，walkedacrosstheroomandsatdownbesideher；andshefelthehadsomethingspecialtosay。

"They’resuretosendformeinadayortwonow，"hebegan。

Shemadenoanswer，andhecontinued："You’lltellmebeforeIgowhatdayI’mtocomebackandgetyou？"

ItwasthefirsttimesincehisreturntoGivrethathehadmadeanydirectallusiontothedateoftheirmarriage；andinsteadofansweringhimshebrokeout："There’ssomethingI’vebeenwantingyoutoknow。TheotherdayinParisIsawMissViner。"

Shesawhimflushwiththeintensityofhissurprise。

"Yousentforher？"

"No；sheheardfromAdelaidethatIwasinParisandshecame。Shecamebecauseshewantedtourgemetomarryyou。

Ithoughtyououghttoknowwhatshehaddone。"

Darrowstoodup。"I’mgladyou’vetoldme。"Hespokewithavisibleeffortatcomposure。Hereyesfollowedhimashemovedaway。

"Isthatall？"heaskedafteraninterval。

"Itseemstomeagreatdeal。"

"It’swhatshe’dalreadyaskedme。"Hisvoiceshowedherhowdeeplyhewasmoved，andathrobofjealousyshotthroughher。

"Oh，itwasforyoursake，Iknow！"Hemadenoanswer，andsheadded："She’sbeenexceedinglygenerous……Whyshouldn’twespeakofit？"

Shehadloweredherhead，butthroughherdroppedlidssheseemedtobewatchingthecrowdedsceneofhisface。

"I’venotshrunkfromspeakingofit。"

"Speakingofher，then，Imean。ItseemstomethatifI

couldtalktoyouaboutherIshouldknowbetter————"

Shebrokeoff，confused，andhequestioned："Whatisityouwanttoknowbetter？"

Thecolourrosetoherforehead。Howcouldshetellhimwhatshescarcelydaredowntoherself？Therewasnothingshedidnotwanttoknow，nofoldorcrannyofhissecretthatherawakenedimaginationdidnotstraintopenetrate；

butshecouldnotexposeSophyVinertothebasefingeringsofaretrospectivejealousy，norDarrowtothetemptationofbelittlingherintheefforttobetterhisowncase。Thegirlhadbeenmagnificent，andtheonlyworthyreturnthatAnnacouldmakewastotakeDarrowfromherwithoutaquestionifshetookhimatall……

Sheliftedhereyestohisface。"IthinkIonlywantedtospeakhername。It’snotrightthatweshouldseemsoafraidofit。IfIwerereallyafraidofitIshouldhavetogiveyouup，"shesaid。

Hebentoverherandcaughthertohim。"Ah，youcan’tgivemeupnow！"heexclaimed。

Shesufferedhimtoholdherfastwithoutspeaking；buttheolddreadwasbetweenthemagain，anditwasonherlipstocryout："HowcanIhelpit，whenIAMsoafraid？"

XXXV

Thenextmorningthedreadwasstillthere，andsheunderstoodthatshemustsnatchherselfoutofthetorporofthewillintowhichshehadbeengraduallysinking，andtellDarrowthatshecouldnotbehiswife。

Theknowledgecametoherinthewatchesofasleeplessnight，when，throughthetearsofdisenchantedpassion，shestaredbackuponherpast。Thereitlaybeforeher，hersoleromance，inallitspaltrypoverty，thecheapestofcheapadventures，themostpitifulofsentimentalblunders。

Shelookedaboutherroom，theroomwhere，forsomanyyears，ifherhearthadbeenquiescentherthoughtshadbeenalive，andpicturedherselfhenceforthcoweringbeforeathrongofmeansuspicions，ofunavowedcompromisesandconcessions。Inthatmomentofself—searchingshesawthatSophyVinerhadchosenthebetterpart，andthatcertainrenunciationsmightenrichwherepossessionwouldhaveleftadesert。

Passionatereactionsofinstinctfoughtagainsttheseeffortsofherwill。Whyshouldpastorfuturecoerceher，whenthepresentwassosecurelyhers？Whyinsanelysurrenderwhattheotherwouldafterallneverhave？HersenseofironywhisperedthatifshesentawayDarrowitwouldnotbetoSophyViner，buttothefirstwomanwhocrossedhispath——as，inasimilarhour，SophyVinerherselfhadcrossedit……Butthemerefactthatshecouldthinksuchthingsofhimsenthershudderingbacktotheoppositepole。

Shepicturedherselfgraduallysubduedtosuchaconceptionoflifeandlove，shepicturedEffiegrowingupundertheinfluenceofthewomanshesawherselfbecoming——andshehidhereyesfromthehumiliationofthepicture……

TheywereatluncheonwhenthesummonsthatDarrowexpectedwasbroughttohim。HehandedthetelegramtoAnna，andshelearnedthathisAmbassador，onthewaytoaGermancure，wastobeinParisthenexteveningandwishedtoconferwithhimtherebeforehewentbacktoLondon。Theideathatthedecisivemomentwasathandwassoagitatingtoherthatwhenluncheonwasoversheslippedawaytotheterraceandthencewentdownalonetothegarden。Thedaywasgreybutmild，withtheheavinessofdecayintheair。Sherambledonaimlessly，followingunderthedenudedboughsthepathsheandDarrowhadtakenontheirfirstwalktotheriver。

Shewassurehewouldnottrytoovertakeher：surehewouldguesswhyshewishedtobealone。Thereweremomentswhenitseemedtodoubleherlonelinesstobesocertainofhisreadingherheartwhileshewassodesperatelyignorantofhis……

Shewanderedonformorethananhour，andwhenshereturnedtothehouseshesaw，assheenteredthehall，thatDarrowwasseatedatthedeskinOwen’sstudy。Heheardherstep，andlookingupturnedinhischairwithoutrising。Theireyesmet，andshesawthathiswereclearandsmiling。Hehadaheapofpapersathiselbowandwasevidentlyengagedinsomeofficialcorrespondence。Shewonderedthathecouldaddresshimselfsocomposedlytohistask，andthenironicallyreflectedthatsuchdetachmentwasasignofhissuperiority。Shecrossedthethresholdandwenttowardhim；

butassheadvancedshehadasuddenvisionofOwen，standingoutsideinthecoldautumnduskandwatchingDarrowandSophyVinerastheyfacedeachotheracrossthelamplitdesk……Theevocationwassovividthatitcaughtherbreathlikeablow，andshesankdownhelplesslyonthedivanamongthepiled—upbooks。Distinctly，atthemoment，sheunderstoodthattheendhadcome。"WhenhespeakstomeI

willtellhim！"shethought