第5章

thinkthepictureescapedmealso；Idon’tremembernoticinganythingexcepttheyounggentleman，especiallywhenhetookoffhishattome。Helookedatmetwicebeforehewentaway。Igothotagain。IsaidtoMrs。Staveley："Whoishe？"

Shelaughedatme。Isaidagain："Whoishe？"Shesaid："HeisyoungMr。Dunboyne。"Isaid："DoesheliveinLondon？"Shelaughedagain。Isaidagain："DoesheliveinLondon？"Shesaid：

"Heishereforaholiday；heliveswithhisfatheratFairmount，inIreland。"

YoungMr。Dunboyne——hereforaholiday——liveswithhisfatheratFairmount，inIreland。Ihavesaidthattomyselffiftytimesover。Andhereitis，sayingitselfforthefifty—firsttimeinmyJournal。Imustindeedbeasimpleton，asHelenasays。Ihadbettergotobedagain。

CHAPTERXIII。

EUNICE’SDIARY。

NOTlongbeforeIlefthome，Iheardoneofourtwoservantstellingtheotheraboutapersonwhohadbeen"bewitched。"Areyoubewitchedwhenyoudon’tunderstandyourownself？Thathasbeenmycuriouscase，sinceIreturnedfromthepictureshow。

ThismorningItookmydrawingmaterialsoutofmybox，andtriedtomakeaportraitofyoungMr。Dunboynefromrecollection。I

succeededprettywellwithhisfrock—coatandcane；but，tryasI

might，hisfacewasbeyondme。IhaveneverdrawnanythingsobadlysinceIwasalittlegirl；Ialmostfeltreadytocry。WhatafoolIam！

ThismorningIreceivedaletterfrompapa——itwasinreplytoaletterthatIhadwrittentohim——sokind，sobeautifullyexpressed，solikehimself，thatIfeltinclinedtosendhimaconfessionofthestrangestateoffeelingthathascomeoverme，andtoaskhimtocomfortandadviseme。Onsecondthoughts，I

wasafraidtodoit。Afraidofpapa！Iamfurtherawayfromunderstandingmyselfthanever。

Mr。Dunboynepaidusavisitintheafternoon。Fortunately，beforewewentout。

IthoughtIwouldhaveagoodlookathim；soastoknowhisfacebetterthanIhadknownityet。Anotherdisappointmentwasinstoreforme。Withoutintendingit，Iamsure，hedidwhatnootheryoungmanhaseverdone——hemademefeelconfused。Insteadoflookingathim，Isatwithmyheaddown，andlistenedtohistalk。Hisvoice——thisishighpraise——remindedmeofpapa’svoice。Itseemedtopersuademeaspapapersuadeshiscongregation。Ifeltquiteateaseagain。Whenhewentaway，weshookhands。Hegavemyhandalittlesqueeze。Igavehimbackthesqueeze——withoutknowingwhy。Whenhewasgone，IwishedI

hadnotdoneit——withoutknowingwhy，either。

IheardhisChristiannameforthefirsttimeto—day。Mrs。

Staveleysaidtome："Wearegoingtohaveadinner—party。ShallIaskPhilipDunboyne？"IsaidtoMrs。Staveley："Oh，do！"

Sheisanoldwoman；hereyesaredim。Attimes，shecanlookmischievous。Shelookedatmemischievouslynow。IwishedIhadnotbeensoeagertohaveMr。Dunboyneaskedtodinner。

AfearhascometomethatImayhavedegradedmyself。Myspiritsaredepressed。This，aspapatellsusinhissermons，isamiserableworld。IamsorryIacceptedtheStaveleys’invitation。

IamsorryIwenttoseethepictures。Whenthatyoungmancomestodinner，IshallsayIhavegotaheadache，andshallstopupstairsbymyself。Idon’tthinkIlikehisChristianname。I

hateLondon。Ihateeverybody。

WhatIwroteupabove，yesterday，isnonsense。IthinkhisChristiannameisperfect。IlikeLondon。Iloveeverybody。

Hecametodinnerto—day。Isatnexttohim。Howbeautifuladress—coatis，andawhitecravat！Wetalked。HewantedtoknowwhatmyChristiannamewas。IwassopleasedwhenIfoundhewasoneofthefewpeoplewholikeit。Hishaircurlsnaturally。Incolor，itissomethingbetweenmyhairandHelena’s。Hewearshisbeard。Howmanly！Itcurlsnaturally，likehishair；itsmellsdeliciouslyofsomeperfumewhichisnewtome。Hehaswhitehands；hisnailslookasifhepolishedthem；IshouldliketopolishmynailsifIknewhow。WhateverIsaid，heagreedwithme；Ifeltsatisfiedwithmyownconversation，forthefirsttimeinmylife。Helenawon’tfindmeasimpletonwhenIgohome。Whatexquisitethingsdinner—partiesare！

Mysistertoldme（whenwesaidgood—by）tobeparticularinwritingdownmytrueopinionoftheStaveleys。HelenawishestocomparewhatshethinksofthemwithwhatIthinkofthem。

MyopinionofMr。Staveleyis——Idon’tlikehim。MyopinionofMissStaveleyis——Ican’tendureher。AsforMasterStaveley，mycleversisterwillunderstandthat_he_isbeneathnotice。But，oh，whatawonderfulwomanMrs。Staveleyis！Wewentouttogether，afterluncheontoday，forawalkinKensingtonGardens。

NeverhaveIheardanyconversationtocomparewithMrs。

Staveley’s。Helenashallenjoyithere，atsecondhand。Iamquitechangedintwothings。First：IthinkmoreofmyselfthanI

everdidbefore。Second：writingisnolongeradifficultytome。

Icouldfillahundredjournals，withoutoncestoppingtothink。

Mrs。Staveleybegannicely；"Isuppose，Eunice，youhaveoftenbeentoldthatyouhaveagoodfigure，andthatyouwalkwell？"

Isaid："Helenathinksmyfigureisbetterthanmyface。ButdoI

reallywalkwell？Nobodyevertoldmethat。"

Sheanswered："PhilipDunboynethinksso。Hesaidtome，’I

resistthetemptationbecauseImightbewantinginrespectifI

gavewaytoit。ButIshouldliketofollowherwhenshegoesout——merelyforthepleasureofseeingherwalk。’"

Istoodstockstill。Isaidnothing。Whenyouareasproudasapeacock（whichneverhappenedtomebefore），Ifindyoucan’tmoveandcan’ttalk。Youcanonlyenjoyyourself。

KindMrs。Staveleyhadmorethingstotellme。Shesaid："IaminterestedinPhilip。IlivednearFairmountinthetimebeforeI

wasmarried；andinthosedayshewasachild。Iwanthimtomarryacharminggirl，andbehappy。"

WhatmademethinkdirectlyofMissStaveley？Whatmadememadtoknowifshewasthecharminggirl？Iwasboldenoughtoaskthequestion。Mrs。StaveleyturnedtomewiththatmischievouslookwhichIhavenoticedalready。IfeltasifIhadbeenrunningatthetopofmyspeed，andhadnotgotmybreathagain，yet。

Butthisgoodmotherlyfriendsetmeatmyease。Sheexplainedherself："Philipisnotmuchliked，poorfellow，inourhouse。Myhusbandconsidershimtobeweakandvainandfickle。Andmydaughteragreeswithherfather。TherearetimeswhensheisbarelyciviltoPhilip。Heistoogood—naturedtocomplain，but_I_seeit。Tellme，mydear，doyoulikePhilip？"

"OfcourseIdo！"Outitcameinthosewords，beforeIcouldstopit。WastheresomethingunbecomingtoayoungladyinsayingwhatIhadjustsaid？Mrs。Staveleyseemedtobemoreamusedthanangrywithme。Shetookmyarmkindly，andledmealongwithher。"Mydear，youareasclearascrystal，andastrueassteel。Youareafavoriteofminealready。"

Whatadelightfulwoman！asIsaidjustnow。Iaskedifshereallylikedmeaswellasshelikedmysister。

Shesaid："Better。"

Ididn’texpectthat，anddidn’twantit。Helenaismysuperior。

SheisprettierthanIam，clevererthanIam，betterworthlikingthanIam。Mrs。StaveleyshiftedthetalkbacktoPhilip。

IoughttohavesaidMr。Philip。No，Iwon’t；IshallcallhimPhilip。IfIhadaheartofstone，Ishouldfeelinterestedinhim，afterwhatMrs。Staveleyhastoldme。

Suchasadstory，insomerespects。Motherdead；nobrothersorsisters。Onlythefatherleft；helivesadismallifeonalonelystormycoast。Notasevereoldgentleman，forallthat。Hisreasonsfortakingtoretirementarereasons（soMrs。Staveleysays）whichnobodyknows。Heburieshimselfamonghisbooks，inanimmenselibrary；andheappearstolikeit。Hissonhasnotbeenbroughtup。likeotheryoungmen，atschoolandcollege。Heisagreatscholar，educatedathomebyhisfather。Tohearthisaccountofhislearningdepressedme。Itseemedtoputsuchadistancebetweenus。IaskedMrs。Staveleyifhethoughtmeignorant。AslongasIliveIshallrememberthereply："Hethinksyoucharming。"

Anyothergirlwouldhavebeensatisfiedwiththis。Iamthemiserablecreaturewhoisalwaysmakingmistakes。MystupidcuriosityspoiledthecharmofMrs。Staveley’sconversation。Andyetitseemedtobeaharmlessquestion；IonlysaidIshouldliketoknowwhatprofessionPhilipbelongedto。

Mrs。Staveleyanswered："Noprofession。"

Ifoolishlyputawrongmeaningonthis。Isaid："Isheidle？"

Mrs。Staveleylaughed。"Mydear，heisanonlyson——andhisfatherisarichman。"

Thatstoppedme——atlast。

Wehaveenoughtoliveonincomfortathome——nomore。Papahastoldushimselfthatheisnot（andcanneverhopetobe）arichman。Thisisnottheworstofit。Lastyear，herefusedtomarryayoungcouple，bothbelongingtoourcongregation。Thiswasveryunlikehisusualkindself。HelenaandIaskedhimforhisreasons。Theywerereasonsthatdidnottakelongtogive。Theyounggentleman’sfatherwasarichman。Hehadforbiddenhissontomarryasweetgirl——becauseshehadnofortune。

Ihavenofortune。AndPhilip’sfatherisarichman。

ThebestthingIcandoistowipemypen，andshutupmyJournal，andgohomebythenexttrain。

IhaveagreatmindtoburnmyJournal。IttellsmethatIhadbetternotthinkofPhilipanymore。

Onsecondthoughts，Iwon’tdestroymyJournal；Iwillonlyputitaway。IfIlivetobeanoldwoman，itmayamusemetoopenmybookagain，andseehowfoolishthepoorwretchwaswhenshewasyoung。

Whatisthisachingpaininmyheart？

Idon’trememberitatanyothertimeinmylife。Isittrouble？

HowcanItell？——Ihavehadsolittletrouble。ItmustbemanyyearssinceIwaswretchedenoughtocry。Idon’tevenunderstandwhyIamcryingnow。Mylastsorrow，sofarasIcanremember，wasthetoothache。Othergirls’motherscomfortthemwhentheyarewretched。Ifmymotherhadlived——it’suselesstothinkaboutthat。Welosther，whileIandmysisterweretooyoungtounderstandourmisfortune。

IwishIhadneverseenPhilip。

Thisseemsanungratefulwish。Seeinghimatthepicture—showwasanewenjoyment。SittingnexttohimatdinnerwasahappinessthatIdon’trecollectfeeling，evenwhenPapahasbeenmostsweetandkindtome。Ioughttobeashamedofmyselftoconfessthis。ShallIwritetomysister？Buthowshouldsheknowwhatisthematterwithme，whenIdon’tknowitmyself？Besides，Helenaisangry；shewroteunkindlytomewhensheansweredmylastletter。

Thereisadreadfullonelinessinthisgreathouseatnight。I

hadbettersaymyprayers，andtrytosleep。Ifitdoesn’tmakemefeelhappier，itwillpreventmespoilingmyJournalbydroppingtearsonit。

Whataneveningofeveningsthishasbeen！Lastnightitwascryingthatkeptmeawake。To—nightIcan’tsleepforjoy。

Philipcalledonusagainto—day。HebroughtwithhimticketsfortheperformanceofanOratorio。Sacredmusicisnotforbiddenmusicamongourpeople。Mrs。StaveleyandMissStaveleywenttotheconcertwithus。PhilipandIsatnexttoeachother。

Mysisterisamusician——Iamnothing。Thatsoundsbitter；butI

don’tmeanitso。AllImeanis，thatIlikesimplelittlesongs，whichIcansingtomyselfbyrememberingthetune。There，mymusicalenjoymentends。Whenvoicesandinstrumentsburstouttogetherbyhundreds，Ifeelbewildered。Ialsogetattackedbyfidgets。Thislastmisfortuneissuretoovertakemewhenchorusesarebeingperformed。Theunfortunatepeopleemployedaremadetokeepsingingthesamewords，overandoverandoveragain，tillIfinditaperfectmiserytolistentothem。Thechoruseswereunendurableintheperformanceto—night。Thisisoneofthem："Hereweareallaloneinthewilderness——aloneinthewilderness——inthewildernessalone，alone，alone——hereweareinthewilderness——aloneinthewilderness——allallaloneinthewilderness，"andsoon，tillIfeltinclinedtocallforthelearnedpersonwhowritesOratorios，andbeghimtogivethepoormusicamoregenerousallowanceofwords。

WheneverIlookedatPhilip，Ifoundhimlookingatme。Perhapshesawfromthefirstthatthemusicwaswearyingmusictomyignorantears。Withhisusualdelicacyhesaidnothingforsometime。Butwhenhecaughtmeyawning（thoughIdidmybesttohideit，foritlookedlikebeingungratefulforthetickets），thenhecouldrestrainhimselfnolonger。Hewhisperedinmyear：

"Youaregettingtiredofthis。AndsoamI。"

"Iamtryingtolikeit，"Iwhisperedback。

"Don’ttry，"heanswered。"Let’stalk。"

Hemeant，ofcourse，talkinwhispers。Wewereagooddealannoyed——especiallywhenthecharacterswereallaloneinthewilderness——byburstsofsingingandplayingwhichinterruptedusatthemostinterestingmoments。Philipperseveredwithamanlyfirmness。WhatcouldIdobutfollowhisexample——atadistance？

Hesaid："IsitreallytruethatyourvisittoMrs。Staveleyiscomingtoanend？"

Ianswered："Itcomestoanendthedayafterto—morrow。"

"AreyousorrytobeleavingyourfriendsinLondon？"

WhatImighthavesaidifhehadmadethatinquiryadayearlier，whenIwasthemostmiserablecreatureliving，Iwouldrathernottrytoguess。Beingquitehappyasthingswere，IcouldhonestlytellhimIwassorry。

"Youcan’tpossiblybeassorryasIam，Eunice。MayIcallyoubyyourprettyname？"

"Yes，ifyouplease。"

"Eunice！"

"Yes。"

"Youwillleaveablankinmylifewhenyougoaway——"

Thereanotherchorusstoppedhim，justasIwaseagerformore。

ItwassuchadelightfullynewsensationtohearayounggentlemantellingmethatIhadleftablankinhislife。ThenextchangeintheOratoriobroughtupayounglady，singingalone。Somepeoplebehindusgrumbledatthesmallnessofhervoice。Wethoughthervoiceperfect。Itseemedtolenditselfsonicelytoourwhispers。

Hesaid："Willyouhelpmetothinkofyouwhileyouareaway？I

wanttoimaginewhatyourlifeisathome。Doyouliveinatownorinthecountry？"

Itoldhimthenameofourtown。Whenwegiveapersoninformation，Ihavealwaysheardthatweoughttomakeitcomplete。SoImentionedouraddressinthetown。ButIwastroubledbyadoubt。Perhapshepreferredthecountry。Beinganxiousaboutthis，Isaid："WouldyouratherhaveheardthatI

liveinthecountry？"

"Livewhereyoumay，Eunice，theplacewillbeafavoriteplaceofmine。Besides，yourtownisfamous。Ithasapublicattractionwhichbringsvisitorstoit。"

Imadeanotherofthosemistakeswhichnosensiblegirl，inmyposition，wouldhavecommitted。Iaskedifhealludedtoournewmarket—place。

Hesetmerightinthesweetestmanner："Ialludedtoabuildinghundredsofyearsolderthanyourmarket—place——yourbeautifulcathedral。"

Fancymynothavingthoughtofthecathedral！ThisiswhatcomesofbeingaCongregationalist。IfIhadbelongedtotheChurchofEngland，Ishouldhaveforgottenthemarket—place，andrememberedthecathedral。NotthatIwanttobelongtotheChurchofEngland。Papa’schapelisgoodenoughforme。

Thesongsungbytheladywiththesmallvoicewassoprettythattheaudienceencoredit。Didn’tPhilipandIhelpthem！Withthesweetestsmilestheladysangitalloveragain。Thepeoplebehinduslefttheconcert。

Hesaid："Doyouknow，Itakethegreatestinterestincathedrals。Iproposetoenjoytheprivilegeandpleasureofseeing_your_cathedralearlynextweek。"

IhadonlytolookathimtoseethatIwasthecathedral。Itwasnosurprisetohearnextthathethoughtof"payinghisrespectstoMr。Gracedieu。"Hebeggedmetotellhimwhatsortofreceptionhemighthopetomeetwithwhenhecalledatourhouse。

IgotsoexcitedindoingjusticetopapathatIquiteforgottowhisperwhenthenextquestioncame。PhilipwantedtoknowifMr。

Gracedieudislikedstrangers。WhenIanswered，"Ohdear，no！"I

saiditoutloud，sothatthepeopleheardme。Cruel，cruelpeople！Theyallturnedroundandstared。Onehideousoldwomanactuallysaid，"Silence！"MissStaveleylookeddisgusted。EvenkindMrs。Staveleyliftedhereyebrowsinastonishment。

Philip，dearPhilip，protectedandcomposedme。

Heheldmyhanddevotedlytilltheendoftheperformance。Whenheputusintothecarriage，Iwaslast。Hewhisperedinmyear：

"Expectmenextweek。"MissStaveleymightbeasill—naturedasshepleased，onthewayhome。Itdidn’tmatterwhatshesaid。TheEuniceofyesterdaymighthavebeenmortifiedandoffended。TheEuniceofto—daywasindifferenttothesharpestthingsthatcouldbesaidtoher。

Allthroughyesterday’sdelightfulevening，IneveroncethoughtofPhilip’sfather。WhenIwokethismorning，IrememberedthatoldMr。Dunboynewasarichman。Icouldeatnobreakfastforthinkingofthepoorgirlwhowasnotallowedtomarryheryounggentleman，becauseshehadnomoney。

Mrs。Staveleywaitedtospeaktometilltherestofthemhadleftustogether。IhadexpectedhertonoticethatIlookeddullanddismal。No！herclevernessgotatmysecretinquiteanotherway。

Shesaid："Howdoyoufeelaftertheconcert？Youmustbehardtopleaseindeedifyouwerenotsatisfiedwiththeaccompanimentslastnight。"

"TheaccompanimentsoftheOratorio？"

"No，mydear。TheaccompanimentsofPhilip。"

IsupposeIoughttohavelaughed。Inmymiserablestateofmind，itwasnottobedone。Isaid："IhopeMr。Dunboyne’sfatherwillnothearhowkindhewastome。"

Mrs。Staveleyaskedwhy。

Mybitternessoverflowedatmytongue。Isaid："Becausepapaisapoorman。"

"AndPhilip’spapaisarichman，"saysMrs。Staveley，puttingmyownthoughtintowordsforme。"Wheredoyougettheseideas，Eunice？Surely，youarenotallowedtoreadnovels？"

"Ohno！"

"Andyouhavecertainlyneverseenaplay？"

"Never。"

"Clearyourhead，child，ofthenonsensethathasgotintoit——I

can’tthinkhow。RichMr。Dunboynehastaughthisheirtodespisethebaseactofmarryingformoney。HeknowsthatPhilipwillmeetyoungladiesatmyhouse；andhehaswrittentomeonthesubjectofhisson’schoiceofawife。’LetPhilipfindgoodprinciples，goodtemper，andgoodlooks；andIpromisebeforehandtofindthemoney。’Thereiswhathesays。AreyousatisfiedwithPhilip’sfather，now？"

Ijumpedupinastateofecstasy。JustasIhadthrownmyarmsroundMrs。Staveley’sneck，theservantcameinwithaletter，andhandedittome。

Helenahadwrittenagain，onthislastdayofmyvisit。Herletterwasfullofinstructionsforbuyingthingsthatshewants，beforeIleaveLondon。IreadonquietlyenoughuntilIcametothepostscript。Theeffectofitonmemaybetoldintwowords：

Iscreamed。Mrs。Staveleywasnaturallyalarmed。"Badnews？"sheasked。Beingquiteunabletoofferanopinion，Ireadthepostscriptoutloud，andlefthertojudgeforherself。

ThiswasHelena’snewsfromhome：

"Imustprepareyouforasurprise，beforeyourreturn。Youwillfindastrangeladyestablishedathome。Don’tsupposethereisanyprospectofherbiddingusgood—by，ifweonlywaitlongenough。Sheisalready（withfather’sfullapproval）asmuchamemberofthefamilyasweare。Youshallformyourownunbiasedopinionofher，Eunice。Forthepresent，Isaynomore。"

IaskedMrs。Staveleywhatshethoughtofmynewsfromhome。Shesaid："Yourfatherapprovesofthelady，mydear。Isupposeit’sgoodnews。"

ButMrs。Staveleydidnotlookasifshebelievedinthegoodnews，forallthat。

CHAPTERXIV。

HELENA’SDIARY。

TO—DAYIwentasusualtotheScripture—classforgirls。Itwasharderworkthanever，teachingwithoutEunicetohelpme。

Indeed，Ifeltlonelyalldaywithoutmysister。WhenIgothome，Iratherhopedthatsomefriendmighthavecometoseeus，andhavebeenaskedtostaytotea。Thehousemaidopenedthedoortome。IaskedMariaifanybodyhadcalled。

"Yes，miss；alady，toseethemaster。"

"Astranger？"

"Neversawherbefore，miss，inallmylife。"Iputnomorequestions。Manyladiesvisitmyfather。TheycallitconsultingtheMinister。Headvisesthemintheirtroubles，andguidesthemintheirreligiousdifficulties，andsoon。Theycomeandgoinasortofsecrecy。SofarasIknow，theyaremostlyoldmaids，andtheywastetheMinister’stime。

Whenmyfathercameintotea，Ibegantofeelsomecuriosityabouttheladywhohadcalledonhim。Visitorsofthatsort，ingeneral，neverappeartodwellonhismindaftertheyhavegoneaway；heseestoomanyofthem，andistoowellaccustomedtowhattheyhavetosay。Onthisparticularevening，however，I

perceivedappearancesthatsetmethinking；helookedworriedandanxious。

"Hasanythinghappened，father，tovexyou？"Isaid。

"Yes。"

"Istheladyconcernedinit？"

"Whatlady，mydear？"

"TheladywhocalledonyouwhileIwasout。"

"Whotoldyoushehadcalledonme？"

"IaskedMaria——"

"Thatwilldo，Helena，forthepresent。"

Hedrankhisteaandwentbacktohisstudy，insteadofstayingawhile，andtalkingpleasantlyasusual。Myrespectsubmittedtohiswantofconfidenceinme；butmycuriositywasinastateofrevolt。IsentforMaria，andproceededtomakemyowndiscoveries，withthisresult：

Nootherpersonhadcalledatthehouse。Nothinghadhappened，exceptthevisitofthemysteriouslady。"Shelookedbetweenyoungandold。And，ohdearme，shewascertainlynotpretty。Notdressednicely，tomymind；buttheydosaydressisamatteroftaste。"

TryasImight，Icouldgetnomorethanthatoutofourstupidyounghousemaid。

Laterintheevening，thecookhadoccasiontoconsultmeaboutsupper。Thiswasapersonpossessingtheadvantagesofageandexperience。Iaskedifshehadseenthelady。Thecook’sreplypromisedsomethingnew："Ican’tsayIsawthelady；butIheardher。"

"Doyoumeanthatyouheardherspeaking？"

"No，miss——crying。"

"Wherewasshecrying？"

"Inthemaster’sstudy。"

"Howdidyoucometohearher？"

"AmItounderstand，miss，thatyoususpectmeoflistening？"

Isalietoldbyalookasbadasalietoldbywords？Ilookedshockedatthebareideaofsuspectingarespectablepersonoflistening。Thecook’ssenseofhonorwassatisfied；shereadilyexplainedherself："Iwaspassingthedoor，miss，onmywayupstairs。"

Heremydiscoveriescametoanend。Itwascertainlypossiblethatanafflictedmemberofmyfather’scongregationmighthavecalledonhimtobecomforted。Butheseesplentyofafflictedladies，withoutlookingworriedandanxiousaftertheyleavehim。

Stillsuspectingsomethingoutoftheordinarycourseofevents，Iwaitedhopefullyforournextmeetingatsupper—time。Nothingcameofit。Myfatherleftmebymyselfagain，whenthemealwasover。Heisalwayscourteoustohisdaughters；andhemadeanapology："Excuseme，Helena，Iwanttothink。"

Iwenttobedinavilehumor，andsleptbadly；wondering，inthelongwakefulhours，whatnewrebuffIshouldmeetwithonthenextday。

AtbreakfastthismorningIwasagreeablysurprised。Nosignsofanxietyshowedthemselvesinmyfather’sface。Insteadofretiringtohisstudywhenwerosefromthetable，heproposedtakingaturninthegarden："Youarelookingpale，Helena，andyouwillbethebetterforalittlefreshair。Besides，Ihavesomethingtosaytoyou。"

Excitement，Iamsure，isgoodforyoungwomen。Isawinhisface，Iheardinhislastwords，thatthemysteryoftheladywasatlasttoberevealed。Thesensationoflanguorandfatiguewhichfollowsadisturbednightleftmedirectly。