第11章

Lizaveta,thepedlar,soldmesomecollarsandcuffscheap,pretty,new,embroideredones。KaterinaIvanovnalikedthemverymuch;sheputthemonandlookedatherselfintheglassandwasdelightedwiththem。\'Makemeapresentofthem,Sonia,\'shesaid,\'pleasedo。\'

\'Pleasedo,\'shesaid,shewantedthemsomuch。Andwhencouldshewearthem?Theyjustremindedherofheroldhappydays。Shelookedatherselfintheglass,admiredherself,andshehasnoclothesatall,nothingsofherown,hasn\'thadalltheseyears!Andsheneverasksanyoneforanything;sheisproud,she\'dsoonergiveawayeverything。Andthesesheaskedfor,shelikedthemsomuch。AndIwassorrytogivethem。\'Whatusearetheytoyou,KaterinaIvanovna?\'I

said。Ispokelikethattoher,Ioughtnottohavesaidthat!Shegavemesuchalook。Andshewassogrieved,sogrievedatmyrefusingher。Anditwassosadtosee……Andshewasnotgrievedforthecollars,butformyrefusing,Isawthat。Ah,ifonlyIcouldbringitallback,changeit,takebackthosewords!Ah,ifI……butit\'snothingtoyou！”

“DidyouknowLizaveta,thepedlar？”

“Yes……Didyouknowher？”Soniaaskedwithsomesurprise。

“KaterinaIvanovnaisinconsumption,rapidconsumption;shewillsoondie,“saidRaskolnikovafterapause,withoutansweringherquestion。

“Oh,no,no,no！”

AndSoniaunconsciouslyclutchedbothhishands,asthoughimploringthatsheshouldnot。

“Butitwillbebetterifshedoesdie。“

“No,notbetter,notatallbetter！”Soniaunconsciouslyrepeatedindismay。

“Andthechildren?Whatcanyoudoexcepttakethemtolivewithyou？”

“Oh,Idon\'tknow,“criedSonia,almostindespair,andsheputherhandstoherhead。

Itwasevidentthatthatideahadveryoftenoccurredtoherbeforeandhehadonlyrouseditagain。

“And,what,ifevennow,whileKaterinaIvanovnaisalive,yougetillandaretakentothehospital,whatwillhappenthen？”hepersistedpitilessly。

“Howcanyou?Thatcannotbe！”

AndSonia\'sfaceworkedwithawfulterror。

“Cannotbe？”Raskolnikovwentonwithaharshsmile。“Youarenotinsuredagainstit,areyou?Whatwillhappentothemthen?Theywillbeinthestreet,allofthem,shewillcoughandbegandknockherheadagainstsomewall,asshedidto-day,andthechildrenwillcry……Thenshewillfalldown,betakentothepolicestationandtothehospital,shewilldie,andthechildren……“

“Oh,no……Godwillnotletitbe！”brokeatlastfromSonia\'soverburdenedbosom。

Shelistened,lookingimploringlyathim,claspingherhandsindumbentreaty,asthoughitalldependeduponhim。

Raskolnikovgotupandbegantowalkabouttheroom。Aminutepassed。Soniawasstandingwithherhandsandherheadhanginginterribledejection。

“Andcan\'tyousave?Putbyforarainyday？”heasked,stoppingsuddenlybeforeher。

“No,“whisperedSonia。

“Ofcoursenot。Haveyoutried？”headdedalmostironically。

“Yes。“

“Anditdidn\'tcomeoff!Ofcoursenot!Noneedtoask。“

Andagainhepacedtheroom。Anotherminutepassed。

“Youdon\'tgetmoneyeveryday？”

Soniawasmoreconfusedthaneverandcolourrushedintoherfaceagain。

“No,“shewhisperedwithapainfuleffort。

“ItwillbethesamewithPolenka,nodoubt,“hesaidsuddenly。

“No,no!Itcan\'tbe,no！”Soniacriedaloudindesperation,asthoughshehadbeenstabbed。“Godwouldnotallowanythingsoawful！”

“Heletsotherscometoit。“

“No,no!Godwillprotecther,God！”sherepeatedbesideherself。

“But,perhaps,thereisnoGodatall,“Raskolnikovansweredwithasortofmalignance,laughedandlookedather。

Sonia\'sfacesuddenlychanged;atremorpassedoverit。Shelookedathimwithunutterablereproach,triedtosaysomething,butcouldnotspeakandbrokeintobitter,bittersobs,hidingherfaceinherhands。

“YousayKaterinaIvanovna\'smindisunhinged;yourownmindisunhinged,“hesaidafterabriefsilence。

Fiveminutespassed。Hestillpacedupanddowntheroominsilence,notlookingather。Atlasthewentuptoher;hiseyesglittered。

Heputhistwohandsonhershouldersandlookedstraightintohertearfulface。Hiseyeswerehard,feverishandpiercing,hislipsweretwitching。Allatoncehebentdownquicklyanddroppingtotheground,kissedherfoot。Soniadrewbackfromhimasfromamadman。

Andcertainlyhelookedlikeamadman。

“Whatareyoudoingtome？”shemuttered,turningpale,andasuddenanguishclutchedatherheart。

Hestoodupatonce。

“Ididnotbowdowntoyou,Iboweddowntoallthesufferingofhumanity,“hesaidwildlyandwalkedawaytothewindow。“Listen,“

headded,turningtoheraminutelater。“Isaidjustnowtoaninsolentmanthathewasnotworthyourlittlefinger……andthatI

didmysisterhonourmakinghersitbesideyou。“

“Ach,yousaidthattothem!Andinherpresence？”criedSonia,frightened。“Sitdownwithme!Anhonour!Why,I\'m……

dishonourable……Ah,whydidyousaythat？”

“ItwasnotbecauseofyourdishonourandyoursinIsaidthatofyou,butbecauseofyourgreatsuffering。Butyouareagreatsinner,that\'strue,“headdedalmostsolemnly,“andyourworstsinisthatyouhavedestroyedandbetrayedyourselffornothing。Isn\'tthatfearful?Isn\'titfearfulthatyouarelivinginthisfilthwhichyouloatheso,andatthesametimeyouknowyourself(you\'veonlytoopenyoureyes)thatyouarenothelpinganyonebyit,notsavinganyonefromanything!Tellme,“hewentonalmostinafrenzy,“howthisshameanddegradationcanexistinyousidebysidewithother,opposite,holyfeelings?Itwouldbebetter,athousandtimesbetterandwisertoleapintothewaterandenditall！”

“Butwhatwouldbecomeofthem？”Soniaaskedfaintly,gazingathimwitheyesofanguish,butnotseemingsurprisedathissuggestion。

Raskolnikovlookedstrangelyather。Hereaditallinherface;

soshemusthavehadthatthoughtalready,perhapsmanytimes,andearnestlyshehadthoughtoutinherdespairhowtoenditandsoearnestly,thatnowshescarcelywonderedathissuggestion。Shehadnotevennoticedthecrueltyofhiswords。(Thesignificanceofhisreproachesandhispeculiarattitudetohershameshehad,ofcourse,notnoticedeither,andthat,too,wascleartohim。)Buthesawhowmonstrouslythethoughtofherdisgraceful,shamefulpositionwastorturingherandhadlongtorturedher。“What,what,“hethought,“couldhithertohavehinderedherfromputtinganendtoit？”

Onlythenherealisedwhatthosepoorlittleorphanchildrenandthatpitifulhalf-crazyKaterinaIvanovna,knockingherheadagainstthewallinherconsumption,meantforSonia。

But,nevertheless,itwascleartohimagainthatwithhercharacterandtheamountofeducationshehadafterallreceived,shecouldnotinanycaseremainso。Hewasstillconfrontedbythequestionhowcouldshehaveremainedsolonginthatpositionwithoutgoingoutofhermind,sinceshecouldnotbringherselftojumpintothewater?

OfcourseheknewthatSonia\'spositionwasanexceptionalcase,thoughunhappilynotuniqueandnotinfrequent,indeed;butthatveryexceptionalness,hertingeofeducation,herpreviouslifemight,onewouldhavethought,havekilledheratthefirststeponthatrevoltingpath。Whatheldherup-surelynotdepravity?Allthatinfamyhadobviouslyonlytouchedhermechanically,notonedropofrealdepravityhadpenetratedtoherheart;hesawthat。Hesawthroughherasshestoodbeforehim……

“Therearethreewaysbeforeher,“hethought,“thecanal,themadhouse,or……atlasttosinkintodepravitywhichobscuresthemindandturnsthehearttostone。“

Thelastideawasthemostrevolting,buthewasasceptic,hewasyoung,abstract,andthereforecruel,andsohecouldnothelpbelievingthatthelastendwasthemostlikely。

“Butcanthatbetrue？”hecriedtohimself。“Canthatcreaturewhohasstillpreservedthepurityofherspiritbeconsciouslydrawnatlastintothatsinkoffilthandiniquity?Cantheprocessalreadyhavebegun?Canitbethatshehasonlybeenabletobearittillnow,becausevicehasbeguntobelessloathsometoher?No,no,thatcannotbe！”hecried,asSoniahadjustbefore。“No,whathaskeptherfromthecanaltillnowistheideaofsinandthey,thechildren……Andifshehasnotgoneoutofhermind……butwhosaysshehasnotgoneoutofhermind?Issheinhersenses?Canonetalk,canonereasonasshedoes?Howcanshesitontheedgeoftheabyssofloathsomenessintowhichsheisslippingandrefusetolistenwhensheistoldofdanger?Doessheexpectamiracle?Nodoubtshedoes。Doesn\'tthatallmeanmadness？”

Hestayedobstinatelyatthatthought。Helikedthatexplanationindeedbetterthananyother。Hebeganlookingmoreintentlyather。

“SoyoupraytoGodagreatdeal,Sonia？”heaskedher。

Soniadidnotspeak;hestoodbesideherwaitingforananswer。

“WhatshouldIbewithoutGod？”shewhisperedrapidly,forcibly,glancingathimwithsuddenlyflashingeyes,andsqueezinghishand。

“Ah,sothatisit！”hethought。

“AndwhatdoesGoddoforyou？”heasked,probingherfurther。

Soniawassilentalongwhile,asthoughshecouldnotanswer。Herweakchestkeptheavingwithemotion。

“Besilent!Don\'task!Youdon\'tdeserve！”shecriedsuddenly,lookingsternlyandwrathfullyathim。

“That\'sit,that\'sit,“herepeatedtohimself。

“Hedoeseverything,“shewhisperedquickly,lookingdownagain。

“That\'sthewayout!That\'stheexplanation,“hedecided,scrutinisingherwitheagercuriosity,withanew,strange,almostmorbidfeeling。Hegazedatthatpale,thin,irregular,angularlittleface,thosesoftblueeyes,whichcouldflashwithsuchfire,suchsternenergy,thatlittlebodystillshakingwithindignationandanger-anditallseemedtohimmoreandmorestrange,almostimpossible。“Sheisareligiousmaniac！”herepeatedtohimself。

Therewasabooklyingonthechestofdrawers。Hehadnoticediteverytimehepacedupanddowntheroom。Nowhetookitupandlookedatit。ItwastheNewTestamentintheRussiantranslation。Itwasboundinleather,oldandworn。

“Wheredidyougetthat？”hecalledtoheracrosstheroom。

Shewasstillstandinginthesameplace,threestepsfromthetable。

“Itwasbroughtme,“sheanswered,asitwereunwillingly,notlookingathim。

“Whobroughtit？”

“Lizaveta,Iaskedherforit。“

“Lizaveta!strange！”hethought。

EverythingaboutSoniaseemedtohimstrangerandmorewonderfuleverymoment。Hecarriedthebooktothecandleandbegantoturnoverthepages。

“WhereisthestoryofLazarus？”heaskedsuddenly。

Sonialookedobstinatelyatthegroundandwouldnotanswer。Shewasstandingsidewaystothetable。

“WhereistheraisingofLazarus?Finditforme,Sonia。“

Shestoleaglanceathim。

“Youarenotlookingintherightplace……It\'sinthefourthgospel,“shewhisperedsternly,withoutlookingathim。

“Finditandreadittome,“hesaid。Hesatdownwithhiselbowonthetable,leanedhisheadonhishandandlookedawaysullenly,preparedtolisten。

“Inthreeweeks\'timethey\'llwelcomemeinthemadhouse!IshallbethereifIamnotinaworseplace,“hemutteredtohimself。

SoniaheardRaskolnikov\'srequestdistrustfullyandmovedhesitatinglytothetable。Shetookthebookhowever。

“Haven\'tyoureadit？”sheasked,lookingupathimacrossthetable。

Hervoicebecamesternerandsterner。

“Longago……WhenIwasatschool。Read！”

“Andhaven\'tyouhearditinchurch？”

“I……haven\'tbeen。Doyouoftengo？”

“N-no,“whisperedSonia。

Raskolnikovsmiled。

“Iunderstand……Andyouwon\'tgotoyourfather\'sfuneralto-morrow？”

“Yes,Ishall。Iwasatchurchlastweek,too……Ihadarequiemservice。“

“Forwhom？”

“ForLizaveta。Shewaskilledwithanaxe。“

Hisnervesweremoreandmorestrained。Hisheadbegantogoround。

“WereyoufriendswithLizaveta？”

“Yes……Shewasgood……sheusedtocome……notoften……shecouldn\'t……Weusedtoreadtogetherand……talk。ShewillseeGod。“

Thelastphrasesoundedstrangeinhisears。Andherewassomethingnewagain：themysteriousmeetingswithLizavetaandbothofthem-religiousmaniacs。

“Ishallbeareligiousmaniacmyselfsoon!It\'sinfectious！”

“Read！”hecriedirritablyandinsistently。

Soniastillhesitated。Herheartwasthrobbing。Shehardlydaredtoreadtohim。Helookedalmostwithexasperationatthe“unhappylunatic。“

“Whatfor?Youdon\'tbelieve?……“shewhisperedsoftlyandasitwerebreathlessly。

“Read!Iwantyouto,“hepersisted。“YouusedtoreadtoLizaveta。“

Soniaopenedthebookandfoundtheplace。Herhandswereshaking,hervoicefailedher。Twiceshetriedtobeginandcouldnotbringoutthefirstsyllable。

“NowacertainmanwassicknamedLazarusofBethany……“sheforcedherselfatlasttoread,butatthethirdwordhervoicebrokelikeanoverstrainedstring。Therewasacatchinherbreath。

RaskolnikovsawinpartwhySoniacouldnotbringherselftoreadtohimandthemorehesawthis,themoreroughlyandirritablyheinsistedonherdoingso。Heunderstoodonlytoowellhowpainfulitwasforhertobetrayandunveilallthatwasherown。Heunderstoodthatthesefeelingsreallywerehersecrettreasure,whichshehadkeptperhapsforyears,perhapsfromchildhood,whileshelivedwithanunhappyfatherandadistractedstepmothercrazedbygrief,inthemidstofstarvingchildrenandunseemlyabuseandreproaches。

Butatthesametimeheknewnowandknewforcertainthat,althoughitfilledherwithdreadandsuffering,yetshehadatormentingdesiretoreadandtoreadtohimthathemighthearit,andtoreadnowwhatevermightcomeofit!……Hereadthisinhereyes,hecouldseeitinherintenseemotion。Shemasteredherself,controlledthespasminherthroatandwentonreadingtheeleventhchapterofSt。

John。Shewentontothenineteenthverse：

“AndmanyoftheJewscametoMarthaandMarytocomfortthemconcerningtheirbrother。

ThenMarthaassoonassheheardthatJesuswascomingwentandmetHim：butMarysatstillinthehouse。

ThensaidMarthauntoJesus,Lord,ifThouhadstbeenhere,mybrotherhadnotdied。

ButIknowthatevennowwhatsoeverThouwiltaskofGod,GodwillgiveitThee……“

Thenshestoppedagainwithashamefacedfeelingthathervoicewouldquiverandbreakagain。

“Jesussaiduntoher,thybrothershallriseagain。

MarthasaithuntoHim,Iknowthatheshallriseagainintheresurrection,atthelastday。

Jesussaiduntoher,Iamtheresurrectionandthelife：hethatbelievethinMethoughheweredead,yetshallhelive。

AndwhosoeverlivethandbelievethinMeshallneverdie。

Believestthouthis?

ShesaithuntoHim,“

(Anddrawingapainfulbreath,Soniareaddistinctlyandforciblyasthoughsheweremakingapublicconfessionoffaith。)

“Yea,Lord：IbelievethatThouarttheChrist,theSonofGodWhichshouldcomeintotheworld。“

Shestoppedandlookedupquicklyathim,butcontrollingherselfwentonreading。Raskolnikovsatwithoutmoving,hiselbowsonthetableandhiseyesturnedaway。Shereadtothethirty-secondverse。

“ThenwhenMarywascomewhereJesuswasandsawHim,shefelldownatHisfeet,sayinguntoHim,LordifThouhadstbeenhere,mybrotherhadnotdied。

WhenJesusthereforesawherweeping,andtheJewsalsoweepingwhichcamewithher,Hegroanedinthespiritandwastroubled,Andsaid,Wherehaveyelaidhim?TheysaiduntoHim,Lord,comeandsee。

Jesuswept。

ThensaidtheJews,beholdhowHelovedhim!

Andsomeofthemsaid,couldnotthisManwhichopenedtheeyesoftheblind,havecausedthateventhismanshouldnothavedied？”

Raskolnikovturnedandlookedatherwithemotion。Yes,hehadknownit!Shewastremblinginarealphysicalfever。Hehadexpectedit。

Shewasgettingnearthestoryofthegreatestmiracleandafeelingofimmensetriumphcameoverher。Hervoicerangoutlikeabell;

triumphandjoygaveitpower。Thelinesdancedbeforehereyes,butsheknewwhatshewasreadingbyheart。Atthelastverse“CouldnotthisManwhichopenedtheeyesoftheblind……“droppinghervoiceshepassionatelyreproducedthedoubt,thereproachandcensureoftheblinddisbelievingJews,whoinanothermomentwouldfallatHisfeetasthoughstruckbythunder,sobbingandbelieving……“Andhe,he-too,isblindedandunbelieving,he,too,willhear,he,too,willbelieve,yes,yes!Atonce,now,“waswhatshewasdreaming,andshewasquiveringwithhappyanticipation。

“JesusthereforeagaingroaninginHimselfcomethtothegrave。Itwasacave,andastonelayuponit。

Jesussaid,Takeyeawaythestone。Martha,thesisterofhimthatwasdead,saithuntoHim,Lordbythistimehestinketh：forhehathbeendeadfourdays。“

Shelaidemphasisonthewordfour。

“Jesussaithuntoher,SaidInotuntotheethatifthouwouldestbelieve,thoushouldestseethegloryofGod?

Thentheytookawaythestonefromtheplacewherethedeadwaslaid。AndJesusliftedupHiseyesandsaid,Father,IthankTheethatThouhastheardMe。

AndIknewthatThouhearestMealways;butbecauseofthepeoplewhichstandbyIsaidit,thattheymaybelievethatThouhastsentMe。

AndwhenHethushadspoken,Hecriedwithaloudvoice,Lazarus,comeforth。

Andhethatwasdeadcameforth。“

(Shereadloudly,coldandtremblingwithecstasy,asthoughshewereseeingitbeforehereyes。)

“Boundhandandfootwithgraveclothes;andhisfacewasboundaboutwithanapkin。Jesussaithuntothem,Loosehimandlethimgo。

ThenmanyoftheJewswhichcametoMaryandhadseenthethingswhichJesusdidbelievedonHim。“

Shecouldreadnomore,closedthebookandgotupfromherchairquickly。

“ThatisallabouttheraisingofLazarus,“shewhisperedseverelyandabruptly,andturningawayshestoodmotionless,notdaringtoraisehereyestohim。Shestilltrembledfeverishly。Thecandle-endwasflickeringoutinthebatteredcandlestick,dimlylightingupinthepoverty-strickenroomthemurdererandtheharlotwhohadsostrangelybeenreadingtogethertheeternalbook。Fiveminutesormorepassed。

“Icametospeakofsomething,“Raskolnikovsaidaloud,frowning。HegotupandwenttoSonia。Sheliftedhereyestohiminsilence。Hisfacewasparticularlysternandtherewasasortofsavagedeterminationinit。

“Ihaveabandonedmyfamilyto-day,“hesaid,“mymotherandsister。

Iamnotgoingtoseethem。I\'vebrokenwiththemcompletely。“

“Whatfor？”askedSoniaamazed。Herrecentmeetingwithhismotherandsisterhadleftagreatimpressionwhichshecouldnotanalyse。

Sheheardhisnewsalmostwithhorror。

“Ihaveonlyyounow,“headded。“Letusgotogether……I\'vecometoyou,wearebothaccursed,letusgoourwaytogether！”

Hiseyesglittered“asthoughheweremad,“Soniathought,inherturn。

“Gowhere？”sheaskedinalarmandsheinvoluntarilysteppedback。

“HowdoIknow?Ionlyknowit\'sthesameroad,Iknowthatandnothingmore。It\'sthesamegoal！”

Shelookedathimandunderstoodnothing。Sheknewonlythathewasterribly,infinitelyunhappy。

“Nooneofthemwillunderstand,ifyoutellthem,butIhaveunderstood。Ineedyou,thatiswhyIhavecometoyou。“

“Idon\'tunderstand,“whisperedSonia。

“You\'llunderstandlater。Haven\'tyoudonethesame?You,too,havetransgressed……havehadthestrengthtotransgress。Youhavelaidhandsonyourself,youhavedestroyedalife……yourown(it\'sallthesame!)。Youmighthavelivedinspiritandunderstanding,butyou\'llendintheHayMarket……Butyouwon\'tbeabletostandit,andifyouremainaloneyou\'llgooutofyourmindlikeme。Youarelikeamadcreaturealready。Sowemustgotogetheronthesameroad!Letusgo！”

“Whatfor?What\'sallthisfor？”saidSonia,strangelyandviolentlyagitatedbyhiswords。

“Whatfor?Becauseyoucan\'tremainlikethis,that\'swhy!Youmustlookthingsstraightinthefaceatlast,andnotweeplikeachildandcrythatGodwon\'tallowit。Whatwillhappen,ifyoushouldreallybetakentothehospitalto-morrow?Sheismadandinconsumption,she\'llsoondie,andthechildren?DoyoumeantotellmePolenkawon\'tcometogrief?Haven\'tyouseenchildrenhereatthestreetcornerssentoutbytheirmotherstobeg?I\'vefoundoutwherethosemothersliveandinwhatsurroundings。Childrencan\'tremainchildrenthere!Atseventhechildisviciousandathief。

Yetchildren,youknow,aretheimageofChrist：\'theirsisthekingdomofHeaven。\'Hebadeushonourandlovethem,theyarethehumanityofthefuture……“

“What\'stobedone,what\'stobedone？”repeatedSonia,weepinghystericallyandwringingherhands。

“What\'stobedone?Breakwhatmustbebroken,onceforall,that\'sall,andtakethesufferingononeself。What,youdon\'tunderstand?You\'llunderstandlater……Freedomandpower,andaboveall,power!Overalltremblingcreationandalltheantheap!……That\'sthegoal,rememberthat!That\'smyfarewellmessage。Perhapsit\'sthelasttimeIshallspeaktoyou。IfIdon\'tcometo-morrow,you\'llhearofitall,andthenrememberthesewords。Andsomedaylateron,inyearstocome,you\'llunderstandperhapswhattheymeant。

IfIcometo-morrow,I\'lltellyouwhokilledLizaveta……Good-bye。“

Soniastartedwithterror。

“Why,doyouknowwhokilledher？”sheasked,chilledwithhorror,lookingwildlyathim。

“Iknowandwilltell……you,onlyyou。Ihavechosenyouout。I\'mnotcomingtoyoutoaskforgiveness,butsimplytotellyou。I

choseyououtlongagotohearthis,whenyourfathertalkedofyouandwhenLizavetawasalive,Ithoughtofit。Good-bye,don\'tshakehands。To-morrow！”

Hewentout。Soniagazedathimasatamadman。Butsheherselfwaslikeoneinsaneandfeltit。Herheadwasgoinground。

“Goodheavens,howdoesheknowwhokilledLizaveta?Whatdidthosewordsmean?It\'sawful！”Butatthesametimetheideadidnotenterherhead,notforamoment!“Oh,hemustbeterriblyunhappy!……

Hehasabandonedhismotherandsister……Whatfor?Whathashappened?Andwhathadheinhismind?Whatdidhesaytoher?Hehadkissedherfootandsaid……said(yes,hehadsaiditclearly)

thathecouldnotlivewithouther……Oh,mercifulheavens！”

Soniaspentthewholenightfeverishanddelirious。Shejumpedupfromtimetotime,weptandwrungherhands,thensankagainintofeverishsleepanddreamtofPolenka,KaterinaIvanovnaandLizaveta,ofreadingthegospelandhim……himwithpaleface,withburningeyes……kissingherfeet,weeping。

Ontheothersideofthedoorontheright,whichdividedSonia\'sroomfromMadameResslich\'sflat,wasaroomwhichlongstoodempty。A

cardwasfixedonthegateandanoticestuckinthewindowsoverthecanaladvertisingittolet。Soniahadlongbeenaccustomedtotheroom\'sbeinguninhabited。ButallthattimeMr。Svidrigailovhadbeenstanding,listeningatthedooroftheemptyroom。WhenRaskolnikovwentouthestoodstill,thoughtamoment,wentontiptoetohisownroomwhichadjoinedtheemptyone,broughtachairandnoiselesslycarriedittothedoorthatledtoSonia\'sroom。Theconversationhadstruckhimasinterestingandremarkable,andhehadgreatlyenjoyedit-somuchsothathebroughtachairthathemightnotinthefuture,to-morrow,forinstance,havetoenduretheinconvenienceofstandingawholehour,butmightlistenincomfort。

ChapterFiveWHENNEXTmorningateleveno\'clockpunctuallyRaskolnikovwentintothedepartmentoftheinvestigationofcriminalcausesandsenthisnameintoPorfiryPetrovitch,hewassurprisedatbeingkeptwaitingsolong：itwasatleasttenminutesbeforehewassummoned。

Hehadexpectedthattheywouldpounceuponhim。Buthestoodinthewaiting-room,andpeople,whoapparentlyhadnothingtodowithhim,werecontinuallypassingtoandfrobeforehim。Inthenextroomwhichlookedlikeanoffice,severalclerksweresittingwritingandobviouslytheyhadnonotionwhoorwhatRaskolnikovmightbe。Helookeduneasilyandsuspiciouslyabouthimtoseewhethertherewasnotsomeguard,somemysteriouswatchbeingkeptonhimtopreventhisescape。Buttherewasnothingofthesort：hesawonlythefacesofclerksabsorbedinpettydetails,thenotherpeople,nooneseemedtohaveanyconcernwithhim。Hemightgowherehelikedforthem。Theconvictiongrewstrongerinhimthatifthatenigmaticmanofyesterday,thatphantomsprungoutoftheearth,hadseeneverything,theywouldnothavelethimstandandwaitlikethat。

Andwouldtheyhavewaitedtillheelectedtoappearateleven?Eitherthemanhadnotyetgiveninformation,or……orsimplyheknewnothing,hadseennothing(andhowcouldhehaveseenanything?)andsoallthathadhappenedtohimthedaybeforewasagainaphantomexaggeratedbyhissickandoverstrainedimagination。Thisconjecturehadbeguntogrowstrongthedaybefore,inthemidstofallhisalarmanddespair。Thinkingitallovernowandpreparingforafreshconflict,hewassuddenlyawarethathewastrembling-andhefeltarushofindignationatthethoughtthathewastremblingwithfearatfacingthathatefulPorfiryPetrovitch。Whathedreadedaboveallwasmeetingthatmanagain;hehatedhimwithanintense,unmitigatedhatredandwasafraidhishatredmightbetrayhim。Hisindignationwassuchthatheceasedtremblingatonce;hemadereadytogoinwithacoldandarrogantbearingandvowedtohimselftokeepassilentaspossible,towatchandlistenandforonceatleasttocontrolhisoverstrainednerves。AtthatmomenthewassummonedtoPorfiryPetrovitch。

HefoundPorfiryPetrovitchaloneinhisstudy。Hisstudywasaroomneitherlargenorsmall,furnishedwithalargewriting-table,thatstoodbeforeasofa,upholsteredincheckedmaterial,abureau,abookcaseinthecornerandseveralchairs-allgovernmentfurniture,ofpolishedyellowwood。Inthefurtherwalltherewasacloseddoor,beyondittherewere,nodoubt,otherrooms。OnRaskolnikov\'sentrancePorfiryPetrovitchhadatonceclosedthedoorbywhichhehadcomeinandtheyremainedalone。Hemethisvisitorwithanapparentlygenialandgood-temperedair,anditwasonlyafterafewminutesthatRaskolnikovsawsignsofacertainawkwardnessinhim,asthoughhehadbeenthrownoutofhisreckoningorcaughtinsomethingverysecret。

“Ah,mydearfellow!Hereyouare……inourdomain“……beganPorfiry,holdingoutbothhandstohim。“Come,sitdown,oldman……orperhapsyoudon\'tliketobecalled\'mydearfellow\'and\'oldman!\'-toutcourt?Pleasedon\'tthinkittoofamiliar……Here,onthesofa。“

Raskolnikovsatdown,keepinghiseyesfixedonhim。“Inourdomain,“theapologiesforfamiliarity,theFrenchphrasetoutcourt,wereallcharacteristicsigns。

“Heheldoutbothhandstome,buthedidnotgivemeone-hedrewitbackintime,“struckhimsuspiciously。Bothwerewatchingeachother,butwhentheireyesmet,quickaslightningtheylookedaway。

“Ibroughtyouthispaper……aboutthewatch。Hereitis。IsitallrightorshallIcopyitagain？”

“What?Apaper?Yes,yes,don\'tbeuneasy,it\'sallright,“

PorfiryPetrovitchsaidasthoughinhaste,andafterhehadsaidithetookthepaperandlookedatit。“Yes,it\'sallright。Nothingmoreisneeded,“hedeclaredwiththesamerapidityandhelaidthepaperonthetable。

Aminutelaterwhenhewastalkingofsomethingelsehetookitfromthetableandputitonhisbureau。

“Ibelieveyousaidyesterdayyouwouldliketoquestionme……

formally……aboutmyacquaintancewiththemurderedwoman？”

Raskolnikovwasbeginningagain。“WhydidIputin\'Ibelieve\'“passedthroughhismindinaflash。“WhyamIsouneasyathavingputinthat\'Ibelieve\'？”cameinasecondflash。AndhesuddenlyfeltthathisuneasinessatthemerecontactwithPorfiry,atthefirstwords,atthefirstlooks,hadgrowninaninstanttomonstrousproportions,andthatthiswasfearfullydangerous。Hisnerveswerequivering,hisemotionwasincreasing。“It\'sbad,it\'sbad!Ishallsaytoomuchagain。“

“Yes,yes,yes!There\'snohurry,there\'snohurry,“mutteredPorfiryPetrovitch,movingtoandfroaboutthetablewithoutanyapparentaim,asitweremakingdashestowardsthewindow,thebureauandthetable,atonemomentavoidingRaskolnikov\'ssuspiciousglance,thenagainstandingstillandlookinghimstraightintheface。

Hisfatroundlittlefigurelookedverystrange,likeaballrollingfromonesidetotheotherandreboundingback。

“We\'veplentyoftime。Doyousmoke?haveyouyourown?Here,acigarette！”hewenton,offeringhisvisitoracigarette。“YouknowIamreceivingyouhere,butmyownquartersarethroughthere,youknow,mygovernmentquarters。ButIamlivingoutsideforthetime,Ihadtohavesomerepairsdonehere。It\'salmostfinishednow……

Governmentquarters,youknow,areacapitalthing。Eh,whatdoyouthink？”

“Yes,acapitalthing,“answeredRaskolnikov,lookingathimalmostironically。

“Acapitalthing,acapitalthing,“repeatedPorfiryPetrovitch,asthoughhehadjustthoughtofsomethingquitedifferent。“Yes,acapitalthing,“healmostshoutedatlast,suddenlystaringatRaskolnikovandstoppingshorttwostepsfromhim。

Thisstupidrepetitionwastooincongruousinitsineptitudewiththeserious,broodingandenigmaticglanceheturneduponhisvisitor。

ButthisstirredRaskolnikov\'sspleenmorethaneverandhecouldnotresistanironicalandratherincautiouschallenge。

“Tellme,please,“heaskedsuddenly,lookingalmostinsolentlyathimandtakingakindofpleasureinhisowninsolence。“Ibelieveit\'sasortoflegalrule,asortoflegaltradition-forallinvestigatinglawyers-tobegintheirattackfromafar,withatrivial,oratleastanirrelevantsubject,soastoencourage,orrather,todivertthemantheyarecross-examining,todisarmhiscautionandthenallatoncetogivehimanunexpectedknockdownblowwithsomefatalquestion。Isn\'tthatso?It\'sasacredtradition,mentioned,Ifancy,inallthemanualsoftheart？”

“Yes,yes……Why,doyouimaginethatwaswhyIspokeaboutgovernmentquarters……eh？”

AndashesaidthisPorfiryPetrovitchscreweduphiseyesandwinked;agood-humoured,craftylookpassedoverhisface。Thewrinklesonhisforeheadweresmoothedout,hiseyescontracted,hisfeaturesbroadenedandhesuddenlywentoffintoanervousprolongedlaugh,shakingalloverandlookingRaskolnikovstraightintheface。Thelatterforcedhimselftolaugh,too,butwhenPorfiry,seeingthathewaslaughing,brokeintosuchaguffawthatheturnedalmostcrimson,Raskolnikov\'srepulsionovercameallprecaution;heleftofflaughing,scowledandstaredwithhatredatPorfiry,keepinghiseyesfixedonhimwhilehisintentionallyprolongedlaughterlasted。Therewaslackofprecautiononbothsides,however,forPorfiryPetrovitchseemedtobelaughinginhisvisitor\'sfaceandtobeverylittledisturbedattheannoyancewithwhichthevisitorreceivedit。ThelatterfactwasverysignificantinRaskolnikov\'seyes：hesawthatPorfiryPetrovitchhadnotbeenembarrassedjustbeforeeither,butthathe,Raskolnikov,hadperhapsfallenintoatrap;thattheremustbesomething,somemotivehereunknowntohim;that,perhaps,everythingwasinreadinessandinanothermomentwouldbreakuponhim……

Hewentstraighttothepointatonce,rosefromhisseatandtookhiscap。

“PorfiryPetrovitch,“hebeganresolutely,thoughwithconsiderableirritation,“yesterdayyouexpressedadesirethatI

shouldcometoyouforsomeinquiries(helaidspecialstressontheword\'inquiries\')。Ihavecomeand,ifyouhaveanythingtoaskme,askit,andifnot,allowmetowithdraw。Ihavenotimetospare……Ihavetobeatthefuneralofthatmanwhowasrunover,ofwhomyou……knowalso,“headded,feelingangryatonceathavingmadethisadditionandmoreirritatedathisanger,“Iamsickofitall,doyouhear,andhavelongbeen。It\'spartlywhatmademeill。Inshort,“heshouted,feelingthatthephraseabouthisillnesswasstillmoreoutofplace,“inshort,kindlyexaminemeorletmego,atonce。Andifyoumustexamineme,dosointheproperform!Iwillnotallowyoutodosootherwise,andsomeanwhile,good-bye,aswehaveevidentlynothingtokeepusnow。“

“Goodheavens!Whatdoyoumean?WhatshallIquestionyouabout？”

cackledPorfiryPetrovitchwithachangeoftone,instantlyleavingofflaughing。“Pleasedon\'tdisturbyourself,“hebeganfidgetingfromplacetoplaceandfussilymakingRaskolnikovsitdown。“There\'snohurry,there\'snohurry,it\'sallnonsense。Oh,no,I\'mverygladyou\'vecometoseemeatlast……Ilookuponyousimplyasavisitor。Andasformyconfoundedlaughter,pleaseexcuseit,RodionRomanovitch。RodionRomanovitch?Thatisyourname?……It\'smynerves,youtickledmesowithyourwittyobservation;Iassureyou,sometimesIshakewithlaughterlikeanIndia-rubberballforhalfanhouratatime……I\'moftenafraidofanattackofparalysis。Dositdown。

Pleasedo,orIshallthinkyouareangry……“

Raskolnikovdidnotspeak;helistened,watchinghim,stillfrowningangrily。Hedidsitdown,butstillheldhiscap。

“Imusttellyouonethingaboutmyself,mydearRodionRomanovitch,“PorfiryPetrovitchcontinued,movingabouttheroomandagainavoidinghisvisitor\'seyes。“Yousee,I\'mabachelor,amanofnoconsequenceandnotusedtosociety;besides,Ihavenothingbeforeme,I\'mset,I\'mrunningtoseedand……andhaveyounoticed,RodionRomanovitch,thatinourPetersburgcircles,iftwoclevermenmeetwhoarenotintimate,butrespecteachother,likeyouandme,ittakesthemhalfanhourbeforetheycanfindasubjectforconversation-theyaredumb,theysitoppositeeachotherandfeelawkward。Everyonehassubjectsofconversation,ladiesforinstance……peopleinhighsocietyalwayshavetheirsubjectsofconversation,c\'estderigueur,butpeopleofthemiddlesortlikeus,thinkingpeoplethatis,arealwaystongue-tiedandawkward。Whatisthereasonofit?Whetheritisthelackofpublicinterest,orwhetheritiswearesohonestwedon\'twanttodeceiveoneanother,I

don\'tknow。Whatdoyouthink?Doputdownyourcap,itlooksasifyouwerejustgoing,itmakesmeuncomfortable……Iamsodelighted……“

RaskolnikovputdownhiscapandcontinuedlisteninginsilencewithaseriousfrowningfacetothevagueandemptychatterofPorfiryPetrovitch。“Doeshereallywanttodistractmyattentionwithhissillybabble？”

“Ican\'tofferyoucoffeehere;butwhynotspendfiveminuteswithafriend,“Porfirypatteredon,“andyouknowalltheseofficialduties……pleasedon\'tmindmyrunningupanddown,excuseit,mydearfellow,Iamverymuchafraidofoffendingyou,butexerciseisabsolutelyindispensableforme。I\'malwayssittingandsogladtobemovingaboutforfiveminutes……Isufferfrommysedentarylife……Ialwaysintendtojoinagymnasium;theysaythatofficialsofallranks,evenPrivyCouncillorsmaybeseenskippinggailythere;

thereyouhaveit,modernscience……yes,yes……Butasformydutieshere,inquiriesandallsuchformalities……youmentionedinquiriesyourselfjustnow……Iassureyoutheseinterrogationsaresometimesmoreembarrassingfortheinterrogatorthanfortheinterrogated……

Youmadetheobservationyourselfjustnowveryaptlyandwittily。

(Raskolnikovhadmadenoobservationofthekind。)Onegetsintoamuddle!Aregularmuddle!Onekeepsharpingonthesamenote,likeadrum!Thereistobeareformandweshallbecalledbyadifferentname,atleast,he-he-he!Andasforourlegaltradition,asyousowittilycalledit,Ithoroughlyagreewithyou。Everyprisonerontrial,eventherudestpeasantknows,thattheybeginbydisarminghimwithirrelevantquestions(asyousohappilyputit)andthendealhimaknock-downblow,he-he-he!-yourfelicitouscompactsson,he-he!

SoyoureallyimaginedthatImeantbygovernmentquarters……he-he!

Youareanironicalperson。Come。Iwon\'tgoon!Ah,bytheway,yes!Onewordleadstoanother。Youspokeofformalityjustnow,aproposoftheinquiry,youknow。Butwhat\'stheuseofformality?

Inmanycasesit\'snonsense。Sometimesonehasafriendlychatandgetsagooddealmoreoutofit。Onecanalwaysfallbackonformality,allowmetoassureyou。Andafterall,whatdoesitamountto?Anexamininglawyercannotbeboundedbyformalityateverystep。Theworkofinvestigationis,sotospeak,afreeartinitsownway,he-he-he！”

PorfiryPetrovitchtookbreathamoment。Hehadsimplybabbledonutteringemptyphrases,lettingslipafewenigmaticwordsandagainrevertingtoincoherence。Hewasalmostrunningabouttheroom,movinghisfatlittlelegsquickerandquicker,lookingattheground,withhisrighthandbehindhisback,whilewithhisleftmakinggesticulationsthatwereextraordinarilyincongruouswithhiswords。

Raskolnikovsuddenlynoticedthatasheranabouttheroomheseemedtwicetostopforamomentnearthedoor,asthoughhewerelistening。

“Isheexpectinganything？”

“Youarecertainlyquiterightaboutit,“Porfirybegangaily,lookingwithextraordinarysimplicityatRaskolnikov(whichstartledhimandinstantlyputhimonhisguard),“certainlyquiterightinlaughingsowittilyatourlegalforms,he-he!Someoftheseelaboratepsychologicalmethodsareexceedinglyridiculousandperhapsuseless,ifoneadherestoocloselytotheforms。Yes……Iamtalkingofformsagain。Well,ifIrecognise,ormorestrictlyspeaking,ifIsuspectsomeoneorothertobeacriminalinanycaseentrustedtome……you\'rereadingforthelaw,ofcourse,RodionRomanovitch？”

“Yes,Iwas……“

“Well,thenitisaprecedentforyouforthefuture-thoughdon\'tsupposeIshouldventuretoinstructyouafterthearticlesyoupublishaboutcrime!No,Isimplymakeboldtostateitbywayoffact,ifItookthismanorthatforacriminal,why,Iask,shouldIworryhimprematurely,eventhoughIhadevidenceagainsthim?InonecaseImaybebound,forinstance,toarrestamanatonce,butanothermaybeinquiteadifferentposition,youknow,sowhyshouldn\'tIlethimwalkaboutthetownabit,he-he-he!ButIseeyoudon\'tquiteunderstand,soI\'llgiveyouaclearerexample。IfIputhiminprisontoosoon,Imayverylikelygivehim,sotospeak,moralsupport,he-he!You\'relaughing？”

Raskolnikovhadnoideaoflaughing。Hewassittingwithcompressedlips,hisfeverisheyesfixedonPorfiryPetrovitch\'s。

“Yesthatisthecase,withsometypesespecially,formenaresodifferent。Yousayevidence。Well,theremaybeevidence。Butevidence,youknow,cangenerallybetakentwoways。Iamanexamininglawyerandaweakman,Iconfessit。Ishouldliketomakeaproof,sotosay,mathematicallyclear,Ishouldliketomakeachainofevidencesuchastwicetwoarefour,itoughttobeadirect,irrefutableproof!AndifIshuthimuptoosoon-eventhoughI

mightbeconvincedhewastheman,Ishouldverylikelybedeprivingmyselfofthemeansofgettingfurtherevidenceagainsthim。Andhow?Bygivinghim,sotospeak,adefiniteposition,Ishallputhimoutofsuspenseandsethismindatrest,sothathewillretreatintohisshell。TheysaythatatSevastopol,soonafterAlma,thecleverpeoplewereinaterriblefrightthattheenemywouldattackopenlyandtakeSevastopolatonce。Butwhentheysawthattheenemypreferredaregularsiege,theyweredelighted,Iamtoldandreassured,forthethingwoulddragonfortwomonthsatleast。

You\'relaughing,youdon\'tbelievemeagain?Ofcourse,you\'reright,too。You\'reright,you\'reright。Theseareanspecialcases,Iadmit。Butyoumustobservethis,mydearRodionRomanovitch,thegeneralcase,thecaseforwhichalllegalformsandrulesareintended,forwhichtheyarecalculatedandlaiddowninbooks,doesnotexistatall,forthereasonthateverycase,everycrimeforinstance,sosoonasitactuallyoccurs,atoncebecomesathoroughlyspecialcaseandsometimesacaseunlikeanythat\'sgonebefore。Verycomiccasesofthatsortsometimesoccur。IfIleaveonemanquitealone,ifIdon\'ttouchhimanddon\'tworryhim,butlethimknoworatleastsuspecteverymomentthatIknowallaboutitandamwatchinghimdayandnight,andifheisincontinualsuspicionandterror,he\'llbeboundtolosehishead。He\'llcomeofhimself,ormaybedosomethingwhichwillmakeitasplainastwicetwoarefour-it\'sdelightful。Itmaybesowithasimplepeasant,butwithoneofoursort,anintelligentmancultivatedonacertainside,it\'sadeadcertainty。For,mydearfellow,it\'saveryimportantmattertoknowonwhatsideamaniscultivated。Andthentherearenerves,therearenerves,youhaveoverlookedthem!Why,theyareallsick,nervousandirritable!……Andthenhowtheyallsufferfromspleen!

ThatIassureyouisaregulargoldmineforus。Andit\'snoanxietytome,hisrunningaboutthetownfree!Lethim,lethimwalkaboutforabit!IknowwellenoughthatI\'vecaughthimandthathewon\'tescapeme。Wherecouldheescapeto,he-he?Abroad,perhaps?APolewillescapeabroad,butnothere,especiallyasIamwatchingandhavetakenmeasures。Willheescapeintothedepthsofthecountryperhaps?

Butyouknow,peasantslivethere,realrudeRussianpeasants。A

moderncultivatedmanwouldpreferprisontolivingwithsuchstrangersasourpeasants。He-he!Butthat\'sallnonsense,andonthesurface。It\'snotmerelythathehasnowheretorunto,heispsychologicallyunabletoescapeme,he-he!Whatanexpression!

Throughalawofnaturehecan\'tescapemeifhehadanywheretogo。

Haveyouseenabutterflyroundacandle?That\'showhewillkeepcirclingandcirclingroundme。Freedomwillloseitsattractions。

He\'llbegintobrood,hellweaveatangleroundhimself,he\'llworryhimselftodeath!What\'smorehewillprovidemewithamathematicalproof-ifIonlygivehimlongenoughinterval……Andhe\'llkeepcirclingroundme,gettingnearerandnearerandthen-flop!He\'llflystraightintomymouthandI\'llswallowhim,andthatwillbeveryamusing,he-he-he!Youdon\'tbelieveme？”

Raskolnikovmadenoreply;hesatpaleandmotionless,stillgazingwiththesameintensityintoPorfiry\'sface。

“It\'salesson,“hethought,turningcold。“Thisisbeyondthecatplayingwithamouse,likeyesterday。Hecan\'tbeshowingoffhispowerwithnomotive……promptingme;heisfartoocleverforthat……

hemusthaveanotherobject。Whatisit?It\'sallnonsense,myfriend,youarepretending,toscareme!You\'venoproofsandthemanIsawhadnorealexistence。Yousimplywanttomakemelosemyhead,toworkmeupbeforehandandsotocrushme。Butyouarewrong,youwon\'tdoit!Butwhygivemesuchahint?Ishereckoningonmyshatterednerves?No,myfriend,youarewrong,youwon\'tdoiteventhoughyouhavesometrapforme……letusseewhatyouhaveinstoreforme。“

Andhebracedhimselftofaceaterribleandunknownordeal。AttimeshelongedtofallonPorfiryandstranglehim。Thisangerwaswhathedreadedfromthebeginning。Hefeltthathisparchedlipswerefleckedwithfoam,hisheartwasthrobbing。Buthewasstilldeterminednottospeaktilltherightmoment。Herealisedthatthiswasthebestpolicyinhisposition,becauseinsteadofsayingtoomuchhewouldbeirritatinghisenemybyhissilenceandprovokinghimintospeakingtoofreely。Anyhow,thiswaswhathehopedfor。

“No,Iseeyoudon\'tbelieveme,youthinkIamplayingaharmlessjokeonyou,“Porfirybeganagain,gettingmoreandmorelively,chucklingateveryinstantandagainpacingroundtheroom。“And,tobesure,you\'reright：Godhasgivenmeafigurethatcanawakennonebutcomicideasinotherpeople;abuffoon;butletmetellyouandIrepeatit,excuseanoldman,mydearRodionRomanovitch,youareamanstillyoung,sotosay,inyourfirstyouthandsoyouputintellectaboveeverything,likeallyoungpeople。Playfulwitandabstractargumentsfascinateyouandthat\'sforalltheworldliketheoldAustrianHofkriegsrath,asfarasIcanjudgeofmilitarymattersthatis：onpaperthey\'dbeatenNapoleonandtakenhimprisoner,andthereintheirstudytheyworkeditalloutinthecleverestfashion,butlookyou,GeneralMacksurrenderedwithallhisarmy,he-he-he!Isee,Isee,RodionRomanovitch,youarelaughingatacivilianlikeme,takingexamplesoutofmilitaryhistory!ButIcan\'thelpit,it\'smyweakness。Iamfondofmilitaryscience。

AndI\'meversofondofreadingallmilitaryhistories。I\'vecertainlymissedmypropercareer。Ioughttohavebeeninthearmy,uponmywordIought。Ishouldn\'thavebeenaNapoleon,butImighthavebeenamajor,he-he-he!Well,I\'lltellyouthewholetruth,mydearfellow,aboutthisspecialcase,Imean：actualfactandaman\'stemperament,mydearsir,areweightymattersandit\'sastonishinghowtheysometimesdeceivethesharpestcalculation!I-listentoanoldman-amspeakingseriously,RodionRomanovitch(ashesaidthisPorfiryPetrovitchwhowasscarcelyfiveandthirtyactuallyseemedtohavegrownold;evenhisvoicechangedandheseemedtoshrinktogether)moreover,I\'macandidman……amIacandidmanornot?Whatdoyousay?IfancyIreallyam：Itellyouthesethingsfornothinganddon\'tevenexpectarewardforit,he-he!Well,toproceed,witinmyopinionisasplendidthing,itis,sotosay,anadornmentofnatureandaconsolationoflife,andwhattricksitcanplay!Sothatitsometimesishardforapoorexamininglawyertoknowwhereheis,especiallywhenhe\'sliabletobecarriedawaybyhisownfancy,too,foryouknowheisamanafterall。Butthepoorfellowissavedbythecriminal\'stemperament,worseluckforhim!Butyoungpeoplecarriedawaybytheirownwitdon\'tthinkofthat\'whentheyoverstepallobstacles\'asyouwittilyandcleverlyexpressedityesterday。Hewilllie-thatis,themanwhoisaspecialcase,theincognito,andhewillliewell,inthecleverestfashion;youmightthinkhewouldtriumphandenjoythefruitsofhiswit,butatthemostinteresting,themostflagrantmomenthewillfaint。Ofcoursetheremaybeillnessandastuffyroomaswell,butanyway!Anywayhe\'sgivenustheidea!Heliedincomparably,buthedidn\'treckononhistemperament。That\'swhatbetrayshim!Anothertimehewillbecarriedawaybyhisplayfulwitintomakingfunofthemanwhosuspectshim,hewillturnpaleasitwereonpurposetomislead,buthispalenesswillbetoonatural,toomuchliketherealthing,againhehasgivenusanidea!Thoughhisquestionermaybedeceivedatfirst,hewillthinkdifferentlynextdayifheisnotafool,and,ofcourse,itislikethatateverystep!Heputshimselfforwardwhereheisnotwanted,speakscontinuallywhenheoughttokeepsilent,bringsinallsortsofallegoricalallusions,he-he!Comesandaskswhydidn\'tyoutakemelongago,he-he-he!Andthatcanhappen,youknow,withthecleverestman,thepsychologist,theliteraryman。Thetemperamentreflectseverythinglikeamirror!Gazeintoitandadmirewhatyousee!Butwhyareyousopale,RodionRomanovitch?Istheroomstuffy?ShallIopenthewindow？”

“Oh,don\'ttrouble,please,“criedRaskolnikovandhesuddenlybrokeintoalaugh。“Pleasedon\'ttrouble。“

Porfirystoodfacinghim,pausedamomentandsuddenlyhetoolaughed。Raskolnikovgotupfromthesofa,abruptlycheckinghishystericallaughter。

“PorfiryPetrovitch,“hebegan,speakingloudlyanddistinctly,thoughhislegstrembledandhecouldscarcelystand。“IseeclearlyatlastthatyouactuallysuspectmeofmurderingthatoldwomanandhersisterLizaveta。LetmetellyouformypartthatIamsickofthis。Ifyoufindthatyouhavearighttoprosecutemelegally,toarrestme,thenprosecuteme,arrestme。ButIwillnotletmyselfbejeeredattomyfaceandworried……“

Hislipstrembled,hiseyesglowedwithfuryandhecouldnotrestrainhisvoice。

“Iwon\'tallowit！”heshouted,bringinghisfistdownonthetable。

“Doyouhearthat,PorfiryPetrovitch?Iwon\'tallowit。“

“Goodheavens!Whatdoesitmean？”criedPorfiryPetrovitch,apparentlyquitefrightened。“RodionRomanovitch,mydearfellow,whatisthematterwithyou？”

“Iwon\'tallowit,“Raskolnikovshoutedagain。

“Hush,mydearman!They\'llhearandcomein。Justthink,whatcouldwesaytothem？”PorfiryPetrovitchwhisperedinhorror,bringinghisfaceclosetoRaskolnikov\'s。

“Iwon\'tallowit,Iwon\'tallowit,“Raskolnikovrepeatedmechanically,buthetoospokeinasuddenwhisper。

Porfiryturnedquicklyandrantoopenthewindow。

“Somefreshair!Andyoumusthavesomewater,mydearfellow。

You\'reill！”andhewasrunningtothedoortocallforsomewhenhefoundadecanterofwaterinthecorner。“Come,drinkalittle,“hewhispered,rushinguptohimwiththedecanter。“Itwillbesuretodoyougood。“

PorfiryPetrovitch\'salarmandsympathyweresonaturalthatRaskolnikovwassilentandbeganlookingathimwithwildcuriosity。

Hedidnottakethewater,however。

“RodionRomanovitch,mydearfellow,you\'lldriveyourselfoutofyourmind,Iassureyou,ach,ach!Havesomewater,dodrinkalittle。“

Heforcedhimtotaketheglass。Raskolnikovraiseditmechanicallytohislips,butsetitonthetableagainwithdisgust。

“Yes,you\'vehadalittleattack!You\'llbringbackyourillnessagain,mydearfellow,“PorfiryPetrovitchcackledwithfriendlysympathy,thoughhestilllookedratherdisconcerted。“Goodheavens,youmusttakemorecareofyourself!DmitriProkofitchwashere,cametoseemeyesterday-Iknow,Iknow,I\'veanasty,ironicaltemper,butwhattheymadeofit!……Goodheavens,hecameyesterdayafteryou\'dbeen。Wedinedandhetalkedandtalkedaway,andI

couldonlythrowupmyhandsindespair!Didhecomefromyou?Butdositdown,formercy\'ssake,sitdown！”

“No,notfromme,butIknewhewenttoyouandwhyhewent,“

Raskolnikovansweredsharply。

“Youknew？”

“Iknew。Whatofit？”

“Whythis,RodionRomanovitch,thatIknowmorethanthataboutyou;

Iknowabouteverything。Iknowhowyouwenttotakeaflatatnightwhenitwasdarkandhowyourangthebellandaskedabouttheblood,sothattheworkmenandtheporterdidnotknowwhattomakeofit。Yes,Iunderstandyourstateofmindatthattime……butyou\'lldriveyourselfmadlikethat,uponmyword!You\'llloseyourhead!

You\'refullofgenerousindignationatthewrongsyou\'vereceived,firstfromdestiny,andthenfromthepoliceofficers,andsoyourushfromonethingtoanothertoforcethemtospeakoutandmakeanendofitall,becauseyouaresickofallthissuspicionandfoolishness。

That\'sso,isn\'tit?Ihaveguessedhowyoufeel,haven\'tI?Onlyinthatwayyou\'llloseyourheadandRazumihin\'s,too;he\'stoogoodamanforsuchaposition,youmustknowthat。Youareillandheisgoodandyourillnessisinfectiousforhim……I\'lltellyouaboutitwhenyouaremoreyourself……Butdositdown,forgoodness\'sake。

Pleaserest,youlookshocking,dositdown。“

Raskolnikovsatdown;henolongershivered,hewashotallover。InamazementhelistenedwithstrainedattentiontoPorfiryPetrovitchwhostillseemedfrightenedashelookedafterhimwithfriendlysolicitude。Buthedidnotbelieveawordhesaid,thoughhefeltastrangeinclinationtobelieve。Porfiry\'sunexpectedwordsabouttheflathadutterlyoverwhelmedhim。“Howcanitbe,heknowsabouttheflatthen,“hethoughtsuddenly,“andhetellsitmehimself！”

“Yes,inourlegalpracticetherewasacasealmostexactlysimilar,acaseofmorbidpsychology,“Porfirywentonquickly。“Amanconfessedtomurderandhowhekeptitup!Itwasaregularhallucination;hebroughtforwardfacts,heimposeduponeveryoneandwhy?Hehadbeenpartly,butonlypartly,unintentionallythecauseofamurderandwhenheknewthathehadgiventhemurdererstheopportunity,hesankintodejection,itgotonhismindandturnedhisbrain,hebeganimaginingthingsandhepersuadedhimselfthathewasthemurderer。ButatlasttheHighCourtofAppealswentintoitandthepoorfellowwasacquittedandputunderpropercare。ThankstotheCourtofAppeals!Tut-tut-tut!Why,mydearfellow,youmaydriveyourselfintodeliriumifyouhavetheimpulsetoworkuponyournerves,togoringingbellsatnightandaskingaboutblood!I\'vestudiedallthismorbidpsychologyinmypractice。Amanissometimestemptedtojumpoutofawindoworfromabelfry。Justthesamewithbell-ringing……It\'sallillness,RodionRomanovitch!Youhavebeguntoneglectyourillness。Youshouldconsultanexperienceddoctor,what\'sthegoodofthatfatfellow?Youarelightheaded!Youweredeliriouswhenyoudidallthis！”

ForamomentRaskolnikovfelteverythinggoinground。

“Isitpossible,isitpossible,“flashedthroughhismind,“thatheisstilllying?Hecan\'tbe,hecan\'tbe。“Herejectedthatidea,feelingtowhatadegreeoffuryitmightdrivehim,feelingthatthatfurymightdrivehimmad。

“Iwasnotdelirious。IknewwhatIwasdoing,“hecried,strainingeveryfacultytopenetratePorfiry\'sgame,“Iwasquitemyself,doyouhear？”

“Yes,Ihearandunderstand。Yousaidyesterdayyouwerenotdelirious,youwereparticularlyemphaticaboutit!Iunderstandallyoucantellme!A-ach!……Listen,RodionRomanovitch,mydearfellow。

Ifyouwereactuallyacriminal,orweresomehowmixedupinthisdamnablebusiness,wouldyouinsistthatyouwerenotdeliriousbutinfullpossessionofyourfaculties?Andsoemphaticallyandpersistently?Woulditbepossible?Quiteimpossible,tomythinking。Ifyouhadanythingonyourconscience,youcertainlyoughttoinsistthatyouweredelirious。That\'sso,isn\'tit？”

Therewasanoteofslynessinthisinquiry。RaskolnikovdrewbackonthesofaasPorfirybentoverhimandstaredinsilentperplexityathim。

“AnotherthingaboutRazumihin-youcertainlyoughttohavesaidthathecameofhisownaccord,tohaveconcealedyourpartinit!Butyoudon\'tconcealit!Youlaystressonhiscomingatyourinstigation。“

Raskolnikovhadnotdoneso。Achillwentdownhisback。

“Youkeeptellinglies,“hesaidslowlyandweakly,twistinghislipsintoasicklysmile,“youaretryingagaintoshowthatyouknowallmygame,thatyouknowallIshallsaybeforehand,“hesaid,conscioushimselfthathewasnotweighinghiswordsasheought。“Youwanttofrightenme……oryouaresimplylaughingatme……“

Hestillstaredathimashesaidthisandagaintherewasalightofintensehatredinhiseyes。

“Youkeeplying,“hesaid。“Youknowperfectlywellthatthebestpolicyforthecriminalistotellthetruthasnearlyaspossible……toconcealaslittleaspossible。Idon\'tbelieveyou！”

“Whatawilypersonyouare！”Porfirytittered,“there\'snocatchingyou;you\'veaperfectmonomania。Soyoudon\'tbelieveme?Butstillyoudobelieveme,youbelieveaquarter;I\'llsoonmakeyoubelievethewhole,becauseIhaveasincerelikingforyouandgenuinelywishyougood。“

Raskolnikov\'slipstrembled。

“Yes,Ido,“wentonPorfiry,touchingRaskolnikov\'sarmgenially,“youmusttakecareofyourillness。Besides,yourmotherandsisterareherenow;youmustthinkofthem。Youmustsootheandcomfortthemandyoudonothingbutfrightenthem……“

“Whathasthattodowithyou?Howdoyouknowit?Whatconcernisitofyours?Youarekeepingwatchonmeandwanttoletmeknowit？”

“Goodheavens!Why,Ilearntitallfromyouyourself!Youdon\'tnoticethatinyourexcitementyoutellmeandotherseverything。FromRazumihin,too,Ilearntanumberofinterestingdetailsyesterday。

No,youinterruptedme,butImusttellyouthat,forallyourwit,yoursuspiciousnessmakesyoulosethecommon-senseviewofthings。Toreturntobell-ringing,forinstance。I,anexamininglawyer,havebetrayedapreciousthinglikethat,arealfact(foritisafactworthhaving),andyouseenothinginit!Why,ifIhadtheslightestsuspicionofyou,shouldIhaveactedlikethat?No,I

shouldfirsthavedisarmedyoursuspicionsandnotletyouseeI

knewofthatfact,shouldhavedivertedyourattentionandsuddenlyhavedealtyouaknock-downblow(yourexpression)saying：\'Andwhatwereyoudoing,sir,pray,attenornearlyelevenatthemurderedwoman\'sflatandwhydidyouringthebellandwhydidyouaskaboutblood?Andwhydidyouinvitetheporterstogowithyoutothepolicestation,tothelieutenant?\'That\'showIoughttohaveactedifIhadagrainofsuspicionofyou。Ioughttohavetakenyourevidenceindueform,searchedyourlodgingandperhapshavearrestedyou,too……soIhavenosuspicionofyou,sinceIhavenotdonethat!

Butyoucan\'tlookatitnormallyandyouseenothing,Isayagain。“

RaskolnikovstartedsothatPorfiryPetrovitchcouldnotfailtoperceiveit。

“Youarelyingallthewhile,“hecried,“Idon\'tknowyourobject,butyouarelying。YoudidnotspeaklikethatjustnowandIcannotbemistaken！”

“Iamlying？”Porfiryrepeated,apparentlyincensed,butpreservingagood-humouredandironicalface,asthoughhewerenotintheleastconcernedatRaskolnikov\'sopinionofhim。“Iamlying……

buthowdidItreatyoujustnow,I,theexamininglawyer?Promptingyouandgivingyoueverymeansforyourdefence;illness,Isaid,delirium,injury,melancholyandthepoliceofficersandalltherestofit?Ah!He-he-he!Though,indeed,allthosepsychologicalmeansofdefencearenotveryreliableandcutbothways：illness,delirium,Idon\'tremember-that\'sallright,butwhy,mygoodsir,inyourillnessandinyourdeliriumwereyouhauntedbyjustthosedelusionsandnotbyanyothers?Theremayhavebeenothers,eh?

He-he-he！”

Raskolnikovlookedhaughtilyandcontemptuouslyathim。

“Briefly,“hesaidloudlyandimperiously,risingtohisfeetandinsodoingpushingPorfirybackalittle,“briefly,Iwanttoknow,doyouacknowledgemeperfectlyfreefromsuspicionornot?Tellme,PorfiryPetrovitch,tellmeonceforallandmakehaste！”

“WhatabusinessI\'mhavingwithyou！”criedPorfirywithaperfectlygood-humoured,slyandcomposedface。“Andwhydoyouwanttoknow,whydoyouwanttoknowsomuch,sincetheyhaven\'tbeguntoworryyou?Why,youarelikeachildaskingformatches!Andwhyareyousouneasy?Whydoyouforceyourselfuponus,eh?He-he-he！”

“Irepeat,“Raskolnikovcriedfuriously,“thatIcan\'tputupwithit！”

“Withwhat?Uncertainty？”interruptedPorfiry。

“Don\'tjeeratme!Iwon\'thaveit!ItellyouIwon\'thaveit。I

can\'tandIwon\'t,doyouhear,doyouhear？”heshouted,bringinghisfistdownonthetableagain。

“Hush!Hush!They\'lloverhear!Iwarnyouseriously,takecareofyourself。Iamnotjoking,“Porfirywhispered,butthistimetherewasnotthelookofoldwomanishgood-natureandalarminhisface。Nowhewasperemptory,stern,frowningandforoncelayingasideallmystification。

Butthiswasonlyforaninstant。Raskolnikov,bewildered,suddenlyfellintoactualfrenzy,but,strangetosay,heagainobeyedthecommandtospeakquietly,thoughhewasinaperfectparoxysmoffury。

“Iwillnotallowmyselftobetortured,“hewhispered,instantlyrecognisingwithhatredthathecouldnothelpobeyingthecommandanddriventoevengreaterfurybythethought。“Arrestme,searchme,butkindlyactindueformanddon\'tplaywithme!Don\'tdare！”

“Don\'tworryabouttheform,“Porfiryinterruptedwiththesameslysmile,asitwere,gloatingwithenjoymentoverRaskolnikov。“I

invitedyoutoseemequiteinafriendlyway。“

“Idon\'twantyourfriendshipandIspitonit!Doyouhear?And,here,Itakemycapandgo。Whatwillyousaynowifyoumeantoarrestme？”

Hetookuphiscapandwenttothedoor。

“Andwon\'tyouseemylittlesurprise？”chuckledPorfiry,againtakinghimbythearmandstoppinghimatthedoor。

Heseemedtobecomemoreplayfulandgood-humouredwhichmaddenedRaskolnikov。

“Whatsurprise？”heasked,standingstillandlookingatPorfiryinalarm。

“Mylittlesurprise,it\'ssittingtherebehindthedoor,he-he-he!

(Hepointedtothelockeddoor。)Ilockedhiminthatheshouldnotescape。“

“Whatisit?Where?What?……“

Raskolnikovwalkedtothedoorandwouldhaveopenedit,butitwaslocked。

“It\'slocked,hereisthekey！”

Andhebroughtakeyoutofhispocket。

“Youarelying,“roaredRaskolnikovwithoutrestraint,“youlie,youdamnedpunchinello！”andherushedatPorfirywhoretreatedtotheotherdoor,notatallalarmed。

“Iunderstanditall!YouarelyingandmockingsothatImaybetraymyselftoyou……“

“Why,youcouldnotbetrayyourselfanyfurther,mydearRodionRomanovitch。Youareinapassion。Don\'tshout,Ishallcalltheclerks。“

“Youarelying!Calltheclerks!YouknewIwasillandtriedtoworkmeintoafrenzytomakemebetraymyself,thatwasyourobject!Produceyourfacts!Iunderstanditall。You\'venoevidence,youhaveonlywretchedrubbishlysuspicionslikeZametov\'s!Youknewmycharacter,youwantedtodrivemetofuryandthentoknockmedownwithpriestsanddeputies……Areyouwaitingforthem?eh!Whatareyouwaitingfor?Wherearethey?Producethem？”

“Whydeputies,mygoodman?Whatthingspeoplewillimagine!Andtodosowouldnotbeactinginformasyousay,youdon\'tknowthebusiness,mydearfellow……Andthere\'snoescapingform,asyousee,“Porfirymuttered,listeningatthedoorthroughwhichanoisecouldbeheard。

“Ah,they\'recoming,“criedRaskolnikov。“You\'vesentforthem!

Youexpectedthem!Well,producethemall：yourdeputies,yourwitnesses,whatyoulike!……Iamready！”

Butatthismomentastrangeincidentoccurred,somethingsounexpectedthatneitherRaskolnikovnorPorfiryPetrovitchcouldhavelookedforsuchaconclusiontotheirinterview。

ChapterSixWHENHErememberedthesceneafterwards,thisishowRaskolnikovsawit。

Thenoisebehindthedoorincreased,andsuddenlythedoorwasopenedalittle。

“Whatisit？”criedPorfiryPetrovitch,annoyed。“Why,Igaveorders……“

Foraninstanttherewasnoanswer,butitwasevidentthattherewereseveralpersonsatthedoor,andthattheywereapparentlypushingsomebodyback。

“Whatisit？”PorfiryPetrovitchrepeated,uneasily。

“TheprisonerNikolayhasbeenbrought,“someoneanswered。

“Heisnotwanted!Takehimaway!Lethimwait!What\'shedoinghere?Howirregular！”criedPorfiry,rushingtothedoor。

“Buthe……“beganthesamevoice,andsuddenlyceased。