第6章

Thered—hairedgirlthresheddistressfullyacrossthesheets。’It’stoohottosleep，’shemoaned；andtheinterruptionjarred。

Exactlythesameway。ThenshewoulddivideheryearsbetweenthelittlestudioinEnglandandKami’sbigstudioatVitry—sur—Marne。No，shewouldgotoanothermaster，whoshouldforceherintothesuccessthatwasherright，ifpatienttoilanddesperateendeavourgaveonearighttoanything。Dickhadtoldherthathehadworkedtenyearstounderstandhiscraft。Shehadworkedtenyears，andtenyearswerenothing。Dickhadsaidthattenyearswerenothing，——butthatwasinregardtoherselfonly。Hehadsaid——thisverymanwhocouldnotfindtimetowrite——thathewouldwaittenyearsforher，andthatshewasboundtocomebacktohimsoonerorlater。Hehadsaidthisintheabsurdletteraboutsunstrokeanddiphtheria；andthenhehadstoppedwriting。Hewaswanderingupanddownmoonlitstreets，kissingcooks。Shewouldliketolecturehimnow，——notinhernightgown，ofcourse，butproperlydressed，severelyandfromaheight。Yetifhewaskissingothergirlshecertainlywouldnotcarewhethershelecturehimornot。Hewouldlaughather。Verygood。

Shewouldgobacktoherstudioandpreparepicturesthatwent，etc。，etc。

Themill—wheelofthoughtswungroundslowly，thatnosectionofitmightbeslurredover，andthered—hairedgirltossedandturnedbehindher。

MaisieputherchininherhandsanddecidedthattherecouldbenodoubtwhateverofthevillainyofDick。Tojustifyherself，shebegan，unwomanly，toweightheevidence。Therewasaboy，andhehadsaidhelovedher。Andhekissedher，——kissedheronthecheek，——byayellowsea—poppythatnoddeditsheadexactlylikethemaddeningdryroseinthegarden。Thentherewasaninterval，andmenhadtoldherthattheylovedher——justwhenshewasbusiestwithherwork。Thentheboycameback，andattheirverysecondmeetinghadtoldherthathelovedher。Thenhehad————Buttherewasnoendtothethingshehaddone。Hehadgivenherhistimeandhispowers。HehadspokentoherofArt，housekeeping，technique，teacups，theabuseofpicklesasastimulant，——thatwasrude，——sablehair—brushes，——hehadgivenherthebestinherstock，——sheusedthemdaily；hehadgivenheradvicethatsheprofitedby，andnowandagain——alook。Suchalook！Thelookofabeatenhoundwaitingforthewordtocrawltohismistress’sfeet。Inreturnshehadgivenhimnothingwhatever，except——hereshebrushedhermouthagainsttheopen—worksleevefhernightgown——theprivilegeofkissingheronce。Andonthemouth，too。Disgraceful！Wasthatnotenough，andmorethanenough？andifitwasnot，hadhenotcancelledthedebtbynotwritingand——probablykissingothergirls？

’Maisie，you’llcatchachill。Dogoandliedown，’saidtheweariedvoiceofhercompanion。’Ican’tsleepawinkwithyouatthewindow。’

Maisieshruggedhershouldersanddidnotanswer。ShewasreflectingonthemeannessesofDick，andonothermeannesseswithwhichhehadnothingtodo。Themoonlightwouldnotlethersleep。Itlayontheskylightofthestudioacrosstheroadincoldsilver；shestaredatitintentlyandherthoughtsbegantoslideoneintotheother。Theshadowofthebigbell—handleinthewallgrewshort，lengthenedagain，andfadedoutasthemoonwentdownbehindthepastureandaharecamelimpinghomeacrosstheroad。Thenthedawn—windwashedthroughtheuplandgrasses，andbroughtcoolnesswithit，andthecattlelowedbythedrought—shrunkriver。Maisie’sheadfellforwardonthewindow—sill，andthetangleofblackhaircoveredherarms。

’Maisie，wakeup。You’llcatchachill。’

’Yes，dear；yes，dear。’Shestaggeredtoherbedlikeaweariedchild，andassheburiedherfaceinthepillowsshemuttered，’Ithink——Ithink……

Butheoughttohavewritten。’

Daybroughttheroutineofthestudio，thesmellofpaintandturpentine，andthemonotonewisdomofKami，whowasaleadenartist，butagoldenteacherifthepupilwereonlyinsympathywithhim。Maisiewasnotinsympathythatday，andshewaitedimpatientlyfortheendofthework。

Sheknewwhenitwascoming；forKamiwouldgatherhisblackalpacacoatintoabunchbehindhim，and，withfadedflueeyesthatsawneitherpupilsnorcanvas，lookbackintothepasttorecallthehistoryofoneBinat。’Youhavealldonenotsobadly，’hewouldsay。’Butyoushallrememberthatitisnotenoughtohavethemethod，andtheart，andthepower，noreventhatwhichistouch，butyoushallhavealsotheconvictionthatnailstheworktothewall。OfthesomanyItaught，’——herethestudentswouldbegintounfixdrawing—pinsorgettheirtubestogether，——’theverysomanythatIhavetaught，thebestwasBinat。Allthatcomesofthestudyandtheworkandtheknowledgewastohimevenwhenhecame。Afterheleftmeheshouldhavedoneallthatcouldbedonewiththecolour，theform，andtheknowledge。Only，hehadnottheconviction。Soto—dayIhearnomoreofBinat，——thebestofmypupils，——andthatislongago。Soto—day，too，youwillbegladtohearnomoreofme。Continuez，mesdemoiselles，and，aboveall，withconviction。’

HewentintothegardentosmokeandmournoverthelostBinatasthepupilsdispersedtotheirseveralcottagesorloiteredinthestudiotomakeplansforthecooloftheafternoon。

MaisielookedatherveryunhappyMelancolia，restrainedadesiretogrimacebeforeit，andwashurryingacrosstheroadtowritealettertoDick，whenshewasawareofalargemanonawhitetroop—horse。HowTorpenhowhadmanagedinthecourseoftwentyhourstofindhiswaytotheheartsofthecavalryofficersinquartersatVitry—sur—Marne，todiscusswiththemthecertaintyofagloriousrevengeforFrance，toreducethecoloneltotearsofpureaffability，andtoborrowthebesthorseinthesquadronforthejourneytoKami’sstudio，isamysterythatonlyspecialcorrespondentscanunravel。

’Ibegyourpardon，’saidhe。’Itseemsanabsurdquestiontoask，butthefactisthatIdon’tknowherbyanyothername：IsthereanyyoungladyherethatiscalledMaisie？’

’IamMaisie，’wastheanswerfromthedepthsofagreatsun—hat。

’Ioughttointroducemyself，’hesaid，asthehorsecaperedintheblindingwhitedust。’MynameisTorpenhow。DickHeldarismybestfriend，and——and——thefactisthathehasgoneblind。’

’Blind！’saidMaisie，stupidly。’Hecan’tbeblind。’

’Hehasbeenstone—blindfornearlytwomonths。’

Maisieliftedupherface，anditwaspearlywhite。’No！No！Notblind！I

won’thavehimblind！’

’Wouldyoucaretoseeforyourself？’saidTorpenhow。

’Now，——atonce？’

’Oh，no！TheParistraindoesn’tgothroughthisplacetillto—night。Therewillbeampletime。’

’DidMr。Heldarsendyoutome？’

’Certainlynot。Dickwouldn’tdothatsortofthing。He’ssittinginhisstudio，turningoversomelettersthathecan’treadbecausehe’sblind。’

Therewasasoundofchokingfromthesun—hat。Maisiebowedherheadandwentintothecottage，wherethered—hairedgirlwasonasofa，complainingofaheadache。

’Dick’sblind！’saidMaisie，takingherbreathquicklyasshesteadiedherselfagainstachair—back。’MyDick’sblind！’

’What？’Thegirlwasonthesofanolonger。

’AmanhascomefromEnglandtotellme。Hehasn’twrittentomeforsixweeks。’

’Areyougoingtohim？’

’Imustthink。’

’Think！IshouldgobacktoLondonandseehimandIshouldkisshiseyesandkissthemandkissthemuntiltheygotwellagain！Ifyoudon’tgoI

shall。Oh，whatamItalkingabout？Youwickedlittleidiot！Gotohimatonce。Go！’

Torpenhow’sneckwasblistering，buthepreservedasmileofinfinitepatienceasMaisie’sappearedbareheadedinthesunshine。

’Iamcoming，’saidshe，hereyesontheground。

’YouwillbeatVitryStation，then，atseventhisevening。’Thiswasanorderdeliveredbyonewhowasusedtobeingobeyed。Maisiesaidnothing，butshefeltgratefulthattherewasnochanceofdisputingwiththisbigmanwhotookeverythingforgrantedandmanagedasquealinghorsewithonehand。Shereturnedtothered—hairedgirl，whowasweepingbitterly，andbetweentears，kisses，——veryfewofthose，——menthol，packing，andaninterviewwithKami，thesultryafternoonworeaway。

Thoughtmightcomeafterwards。HerpresentdutywastogotoDick，——Dickwhoownedthewondrousfriendandsatinthedarkplayingwithherunopenedletters。

’Butwhatwillyoudo，’shesaidtohercompanion。

’I？Oh，Ishallstayhereand——finishyourMelancolia，’shesaid，smilingpitifully。’Writetomeafterwards。’

ThatnightthereranalegendthroughVitry—sur—MarneofamadEnglishman，doubtlesssufferingfromsunstroke，whohaddrunkalltheofficersofthegarrisonunderthetable，hadborrowedahorsefromthelines，andhadthenandthereeloped，aftertheEnglishcustom，withoneofthosemoremadEnglishgirlswhodrewpicturesdownthereunderthecareofthatgoodMonsieurKami。

’Theyareverydroll，’saidSuzannetotheconscriptinthemoonlightbythestudiowall。’Shewalkedalwayswiththosebigeyesthatsawnothing，andyetshekissesmeonbothcheeksasthoughsheweremysister，andgivesme——see——tenfrancs！’

Theconscriptleviedacontributiononbothgifts；forhepridedhimselfonbeingagoodsoldier。

TorpenhowspokeverylittletoMaisieduringthejourneytoCalais；buthewascarefultoattendtoallherwants，togetheracompartmententirelytoherself，andtoleaveheralone。Hewasamazedoftheeasewithwhichthematterhadbeenaccomplished。

’Thesafestthingwouldbetoletherthinkthingsout。ByDick’sshowing，——whenhewasoffhishead，——shemusthaveorderedhimaboutverythoroughly。Wonderhowshelikesbeingunderorders。’

Maisienevertold。Shesatintheemptycompartmentoftenwithhereyesshut，thatshemightrealisethesensationofblindness。ItwasanorderthatsheshouldreturntoLondonswiftly，andshefoundherselfatlastalmostbeginningtoenjoythesituation。Thiswasbetterthanlookingafterluggageandared—hairedfriendwhonevertookanyinterestinhersurroundings。Butthereappearedtobeafeelingintheairthatshe，Maisie，——ofallpeople，——wasindisgrace。Thereforeshejustifiedherconducttoherselfwithgreatsuccess，tillTorpenhowcameuptoheronthesteamerandwithoutprefacebegantotellthestoryofDick’sblindness，suppressingafewdetails，butdwellingatlengthonthemiseriesofdelirium。Hestoppedbeforehereachedtheend，asthoughhehadlostinterestinthesubject，andwentforwardtosmoke。Maisiewasfuriouswithhimandwithherself。

ShewashurriedonfromDovertoLondonalmostbeforeshecouldaskforbreakfast，and——shewaspastanyfeelingofindignationnow——wasbiddencurtlytowaitinahallatthefootofsomelead—coveredstairswhileTorpenhowwentuptomakeinquiries。Againtheknowledgethatshewasbeingtreatedlikeanaughtylittlegirlmadeherpalecheeksflame。ItwasallDick’sfaultforbeingsostupidastogoblind。

Torpenhowledheruptoashutdoor，whichheopenedverysoftly。Dickwassittingbythewindow，withhischinonhischest。Therewerethreeenvelopesinhishand，andheturnedthemoverandover。Thebigmanwhogaveorderswasnolongerbyherside，andthestudiodoorsnappedbehindher。

Dickthrustthelettersintohispocketasheheardthesound。’Hullo，Topr！Isthatyou？I’vebeensolonely。’

Hisvoicehadtakenthepeculiarflatnessoftheblind。Maisiepressedherselfupintoacorneroftheroom。Herheartwasbeatingfuriously，andsheputonehandonherbreasttokeepitquiet。Dickwasstaringdirectlyather，andsherealisedforthefirsttimethathewasblind。

Shuttinghereyesinarail—waycarriagetoopenthemwhenshepleasedwaschild’splay。Thismanwasblindthoughhiseyeswerewideopen。

’Torp，isthatyou？Theysaidyouwerecoming。’Dicklookedpuzzledandalittleirritatedatthesilence。

’No；it’sonlyme，’wastheanswer，inastrainedlittlewhisper。Maisiecouldhardlymoveherlips。

’H’m！’saidDick，composedly，withoutmoving。’Thisisanewphenomenon。DarknessI’mgettingusedto；butIobjecttohearingvoices。’

Washemad，then，aswellasblind，thathetalkedtohimself？Maisie’sheartbeatmorewildly，andshebreathedingasps。Dickroseandbegantofeelhiswayacrosstheroom，touchingeachtableandchairashepassed。Oncehecaughthisfootonarug，andswore，droppingonhiskneestofeelwhattheobstructionmightbe。MaisierememberedhimwalkingintheParkasthoughalltheearthbelongedtohim，trampingupanddownherstudiotwomonthsago，andflyingupthegangwayoftheChannelsteamer。Thebeatingofherheartwasmakinghersick，andDickwascomingnearer，guidedbythesoundofherbreathing。Sheputoutahandmechanicallytowardhimoffortodrawhimtoherself，shedidnotknowwhich。Ittouchedhischest，andhesteppedbackasthoughhehadbeenshot。

’It’sMaisie！’saidhe，withadrysob。’Whatareyoudoinghere？’

’Icame——Icame——toseeyou，please。’

Dick’slipsclosedfirmly。

’Won’tyousitdown，then？Yousee，I’vehadsomebotherwithmyeyes，and————’

’Iknow。Iknow。Whydidn’tyoutellme？’

’Icouldn’twrite。’

’YoumighthavetoldMr。Torpenhow。’

’Whathashetodowithmyaffairs？’

’He——hebroughtmefromVitry—sur—Marne。HethoughtIoughttoseeyou。’

’Why，whathashappened？CanIdoanythingforyou？No，Ican’t。Iforgot。’

’Oh，Dick，I’msosorry！I’vecometotellyou，and————Letmetakeyoubacktoyourchair。’

’Don’t！I’mnotachild。Youonlydothatoutofpity。Inevermeanttotellyouanythingaboutit。I’mnogoodnow。I’mdownanddonefor。Letmealone！’

Hegropedbacktohischair，hischestlabouringashesatdown。

Maisiewatchedhim，andthefearwentoutofherheart，tobefollowedbyaverybittershame。HehadspokenatruththathadbeenhiddenfromthegirlthrougheverystepoftheimpetuousflighttoLondon；forhewas，indeed，downanddonefor——masterfulnolongerbutratheralittleabject；

neitheranartiststrongerthanshe，noramantobelookedupto——onlysomeblindonethatsatinachairandseemedonthepointofcrying。Shewasimmenselyandunfeignedlysorryforhim——moresorrythanshehadeverbeenforanyoneinherlife，butnotsorryenoughtodenyhiswords。

Soshestoodstillandfeltashamedandalittlehurt，becauseshehadhonestlyintendedthatherjourneyshouldendtriumphantly；andnowshewasonlyfilledwithpitymoststartlinglydistinctfromlove。

’Well？’saidDick，hisfacesteadilyturnedaway。’Inevermeanttoworryyouanymore。What’sthematter？’

HewasconsciousthatMaisiewascatchingherbreath，butwasasunpreparedasherselfforthetorrentofemotionthatfollowed。Shehaddroppedintoachairandwassobbingwithherfacehiddeninherhands。

’Ican’t——Ican’t！’shecrieddesperately。’Indeed，Ican’t。Itisn’tmyfault。

I’msosorry。Oh，Dickie，I’msosorry。’

Dick’sshouldersstraightenedagain，forthewordslashedlikeawhip。

Stillthesobbingcontinued。Itisnotgoodtorealisethatyouhavefailedinthehouroftrialorflinchedbeforethemerepossibilityofmakingsacrifices。

’Idodespisemyself——indeedIdo。ButIcan’t。Oh，Dickie，youwouldn’taskme——wouldyou？’wailedMaisie。

Shelookedupforaminute，andbychanceithappenedthatDick’seyesfellonhers。Theunshavenfacewasverywhiteandset，andthelipsweretryingtoforcethemselvesintoasmile。Butitwastheworn—outeyesthatMaisiefeared。HerDickhadgoneblindandleftinhisplacesomeonethatshecouldhardlyrecognisetillhespoke。

’Whoisaskingyoutodoanything，Maisie？Itoldyouhowitwouldbe。

What’stheuseofworrying？Forpity’ssakedon’tcrylikethat；itisn’tworthit。’

’Youdon’tknowhowIhatemyself。Oh，Dick，helpme——helpme！’Thepassionoftearshadgrownbeyondhercontrolandwasbeginningtoalarmtheman。Hestumbledforwardandputhisarmroundher，andherheadfellonhisshoulder。

’Hush，dear，hush！Don’tcry。You’requiteright，andyou’venothingtoreproachyourselfwith——youneverhad。You’reonlyalittleupsetbythejourney，andIdon’tsupposeyou’vehadanybreakfast。WhatabruteTorpwastobringyouover。’

’Iwantedtocome。Ididindeed，’sheprotested。

’Verywell。Andnowyou’vecomeandseen，andI’m——immenselygrateful。

Whenyou’rebetteryoushallgoawayandgetsomethingtoeat。Whatsortofapassagedidyouhavecomingover？’

Maisiewascryingmoresubduedly，forthefirsttimeinherlifegladthatshehadsomethingtoleanagainst。Dickpattedherontheshouldertenderlybutclumsily，forhewasnotquitesurewherehershouldermightbe。

Shedrewherselfoutofhisarmsatlastandwaited，tremblingandmostunhappy。Hehadfelthiswaytothewindowtoputthewidthoftheroombetweenthem，andtoquietalittlethetumultinhisheart。

’Areyoubetternow？’hesaid。

’Yes，but——don’tyouhateme？’

’Ihateyou？MyGod！I？’

’Isn’t——isn’tthereanythingIcoulddoforyou，then？I’llstayhereinEnglandtodoit，ifyoulike。PerhapsIcouldcomeandseeyousometimes。’

’Ithinknot，dear。Itwouldbekindestnottoseemeanymore，please。I

don’twanttoseemrude，but——don’tyouthink——perhapsyouhadalmostbettergonow。’

Hewasconsciousthathecouldnotbearhimselfasamanifthestraincontinuedmuchlonger。

’Idon’tdeserveanythingelse。I’llgo，Dick。Oh，I’msomiserable。’

’Nonsense。You’venothingtoworryabout；I’dtellyouifyouhad。Waitamoment，dear。I’vegotsomethingtogiveyoufirst。Imeantitforyoueversincethislittletroublebegan。It’smyMelancolia；shewasabeautywhenIlastsawher。Youcankeepherforme，andifeveryou’repooryoucansellher。She’sworthafewhundredsatanystateofthemarket。’Hegropedamonghiscanvases。’She’sframedinblack。IsthisablackframethatIhavemyhandon？Theresheis。Whatdoyouthinkofher？’

HeturnedascarredformlessmuddleofpainttowardsMaisie，andtheeyesstrainedasthoughtheywouldcatchherwonderandsurprise。Onethingandonethingonlycouldshedoforhim。

’Well？’

Thevoicewasfullerandmorerounded，becausethemanknewhewasspeakingofhisbestwork。Maisielookedattheblur，andalunaticdesiretolaughcaughtherbythethroat。ButforDick’ssake——whateverthismadblanknessmightmean——shemustmakenosign。Hervoicechokedwithhard—heldtearsassheanswered，stillgazingatthewreck——

’Oh，Dick，itisgood！’

Heheardthelittlehystericalgulpandtookitfortribute。’Won’tyouhaveit，then？I’llsenditovertoyourhouseifyouwill。’

’I？Ohyes——thankyou。Ha！ha！’Ifshedidnotflyatoncethelaughterthatwasworsethantearswouldkillher。Sheturnedandran，chokingandblinded，downthestaircasesthatwereemptyoflifetotakerefugeinacabandgotoherhouseacrosstheParks。Thereshesatdowninthedismantleddrawing—roomandthoughtofDickinhisblindness，uselesstilltheendoflife，andofherselfinherowneyes。Behindthesorrow，theshame，andthehumiliation，layfearofthecoldwrathofthered—hairedgirlwhenMaisieshouldreturn。Maisiehadneverfearedhercompanionbefore。Notuntilshefoundherselfsaying，’Well，heneveraskedme，’didsherealiseherscornofherself。

AndthatistheendofMaisie。

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ForDickwasreservedmoresearchingtorment。HecouldnotrealiseatfirstthatMaisie，whomhehadorderedtogohadlefthimwithoutawordoffarewell。HewassavagelyangryagainstTorpenhow，whohadbroughtuponhimthishumiliationandtroubledhismiserablepeace。Thenhisdarkhourcameandhewasalonewithhimselfandhisdesirestogetwhathelphecouldfromthedarkness。Thequeencoulddonowrong，butinfollowingtheright，sofarasitservedherwork，shehadwoundedheronesubjectmorethanhisownbrainwouldlethimknow。

’It’sallIhadandI’velostit，’hesaid，assoonasthemiserypermittedclearthinking。’AndTorpwillthinkthathehasbeensoinfernallycleverthatIshan’thavethehearttotellhim。Imustthinkthisoutquietly。’

’Hullo！’saidTorpenhow，enteringthestudioafterDickhadenjoyedtwohoursofthought。’I’mback。Areyoufeelinganybetter？’

’Torp，Idon’tknowwhattosay。Comehere。’Dickcoughedhuskily，wondering，indeed，whatheshouldsay，andhowtosayittemperately。

’What’stheneedforsayinganything？Getupandtramp。’Torpenhowwasperfectlysatisfied。

Theywalkedupanddownasofcustom，Torpenhow’shandonDick’sshoulder，andDickburiedinhisownthoughts。

’Howintheworlddidyoufinditallout？’saidDick，atlast。

’Youshouldn’tgooffyourheadifyouwanttokeepsecrets，Dickie。Itwasabsolutelyimpertinentonmypart；butifyou’dseenmerocketingaboutonahalf—trainedFrenchtroop—horseunderablazingsunyou’dhavelaughed。Therewillbeacharivariinmyroomsto—night。Sevenotherdevils————’

’Iknow——therowintheSouthernSoudan。Isurprisedtheircouncilstheotherday，anditmademeunhappy。Haveyoufixedyourflinttogo？

Whod’youworkfor？’

’Haven’tsignedanycontractsyet。Iwantedtoseehowyourbusinesswouldturnout。’

’Wouldyouhavestayedwithme，then，if——thingshadgonewrong？’Heputhisquestioncautiously。

’Don’taskmetoomuch。I’monlyaman。’

’You’vetriedtobeanangelverysuccessfully。’

’Ohye——es！……Well，doyouattendthefunctionto—night？Weshallbehalfscrewedbeforethemorning。Allthemenbelievethewar’sacertainty。’

’Idon’tthinkIwill，oldman，ifit’sallthesametoyou。I’llstayquiethere。’

’Andmeditate？Idon’tblameyou。Youobserveagoodtimeifeveramandid。’

Thatnighttherewasatumultonthestairs。Thecorrespondentspouredinfromtheatre，dinner，andmusic—halltoTorpenhow’sroomthattheymightdiscusstheirplanofcampaignintheeventofmilitaryoperationsbecomingacertainty。Torpenhow，theKeneu，，andtheNilghaihadbiddenallthementheyhadworkedwithtotheorgy；andMr。Beeton，thehousekeeper，declaredthatneverbeforeinhischeckeredexperiencehadheseenquitesuchafancylotofgentlemen。Theywakedthechamberswithshoutingsandsong；andtheeldermenwerequiteasbadastheyounger。Forthechancesofwarwereinfrontofthem，andallknewwhatthosemeant。

Sittinginhisownroomalittleperplexedbythenoiseacrossthelanding，Dicksuddenlybegantolaughtohimself。

’Whenonecomestothinkofitthesituationisintenselycomic。Maisie’squiteright——poorlittlething。Ididn’tknowshecouldcrylikethatbefore；

butnowIknowwhatTorpthinks，I’msurehe’dbequitefoolenoughtostayathomeandtrytoconsoleme——ifheknew。Besides，itisn’tnicetoownthatyou’vebeenthrownoverlikeabrokenchair。Imustcarrythisbusinessthroughalone——asusual。Ifthereisn’tawar，andTorpfindsout，Ishalllookfoolish，that’sall。IfthereisawayImustn’tinterferewithanotherman’schances。Businessisbusiness，andIwanttobealone——I

wanttobealone。Whatarowthey’remaking！’

Somebodyhammeredatthestudiodoor。

’Comeoutandfrolic，Dickie，’saidtheNilghai。

’Ishouldliketo，butIcan’t。I’mnotfeelingfrolicsome。’

’Then，I’lltelltheboysandthey’lldragyoulikeabadger。’

’Pleasenot，oldman。Onmyword，I’dsoonerbeleftalonejustnow。’

’Verygood。Canwesendanythingintoyou？Fizz，forinstance。

CassavettiisbeginningtosingsongsoftheSunnySouthalready。’

ForoneminuteDickconsideredthepropositionseriously。

’No，thanks，I’veaheadachealready。’

’Virtuouschild。That’stheeffectofemotionontheyoung。Allmycongratulations，Dick。Ialsowasconcernedintheconspiracyforyourwelfare。’

’Gotothedevil——oh，sendBinkieinhere。’

Thelittledogenteredonelasticfeet，riotousfromhavingbeenmademuchofalltheevening。Hehadhelpedtosingthechoruses；butscarcelyinsidethestudioherealisedthatthiswasnoplacefortail—wagging，andsettledhimselfonDick’slaptillitwasbedtime。ThenhewenttobedwithDick，whocountedeveryhourasitstruck，androseinthemorningwithapainfullyclearheadtoreceiveTorpenhow’smoreformalcongratulationsandaparticularaccountofthelastnight’srevels。

’Youaren’tlookingveryhappyforanewlyacceptedman，’saidTorpenhow。

’Nevermindthat——it’smyownaffair，andI’mallright。Doyoureallygo？’

’Yes。WiththeoldCentralSouthernasusual。Theywired，andIacceptedonbettertermsthanbefore。’

’Whendoyoustart？’

’Thedayafterto—morrow——forBrindisi。’

’ThankGod。’Dickspokefromthebottomofhisheart。

’Well，that’snotaprettywayofsayingyou’regladtogetridofme。Butmeninyourconditionareallowedtobeselfish。’

’Ididn’tmeanthat。Willyougetahundredpoundscashedformebeforeyouleave？’

’That’saslenderamountforhousekeeping，isn’tit？’

’Oh，it’sonlyfor——marriageexpenses。’

Torpenhowbroughthimthemoney，counteditoutinfivesandtens，andcarefullyputitawayinthewritingtable。

’NowIsupposeIshallhavetolistentohisravingsabouthisgirluntilI

go。Heavensenduspatiencewithamaninlove！’hesaidtohimself。

ButneveraworddidDicksayofMaisieormarriage。HehunginthedoorwayofTorpenhow’sroomwhenthelatterwaspackingandaskedinnumerablequestionsaboutthecomingcampaign，tillTorpenhowbegantofeelannoyed。

’You’reasecretiveanimal，Dickie，andyouconsumeyourownsmoke，don’tyou？’hesaidonthelastevening。

’I——Isupposeso。Bytheway，howlongdoyouthinkthiswarwilllast？’

’Days，weeks，ormonths。Onecannevertell。Itmaygoonforyears。’

’IwishIweregoing。’

’GoodHeavens！You’rethemostunaccountablecreature！Hasn’titoccurredtoyouthatyou’regoingtobemarried——thankstome？’

’Ofcourse，yes。I’mgoingtobemarried——soIam。Goingtobemarried。

I’mawfullygratefultoyou。Haven’tItoldyouthat？’

’Youmightbegoingtobehangedbythelookofyou，’saidTorpenhow。

AndthenextdayTorpenhowbadehimgood—byeandlefthimtothelonelinesshehadsomuchdesired。

CHAPTERXIV

Yetatthelast，ereourspearmenhadfoundhim，Yetatthelast，ereasword—thrustcouldsave，Yetatthelast，withhismastersaroundhim，HeoftheFaithspokeasmastertoslave；

Yetatthelast，tho’theKafirshadmaimedhim，Brokenbybondageandwreckedbythereiver，——

Yetatthelast，tho’thedarknesshadclaimedhim，HecalleduponAllahanddiedabeliever。

——Kizzilbashi。

’BEGyourpardon，Mr。Heldar，but——butisn’tnothin’goingtohappen？’

saidMr。Beeton。

’No！’Dickhadjustwakedtoanothermorningofblankdespairandhistemperwasoftheshortest。

’’Tain’tmyregularbusiness，o’course，sir；andwhatIsayis，"Mindyourownbusinessandletotherpeoplemindtheirs；"butjustbeforeMr。

Torpenhowwentawayhegivemetounderstand，like，thatyoumightbemovingintoahouseofyourown，sotospeak——asortofhousewithroomsupstairsanddownstairswhereyou’dbebetterattendedto，thoughItrytoactjustbyallourtenants。Don’tI？’

’Ah！Thatmusthavebeenamad—house。Ishan’ttroubleyoutotakemethereyet。Getmemybreakfast，please，andleavemealone。’

’IhopeIhaven’tdoneanythingwrong，sir，butyouknowIhopethatasfarasamancanItriestodotheproperthingbyallthegentlemeninchambers——andmoreparticularthosewhoselotishard——suchasyou，forinstance，Mr。Heldar。Youlikessoft—roebloater，don’tyou？Soft—roebloatersisscarcerthanhard—roe，butwhatIsaysis，"Nevermindalittleextratroublesolongasyougivesatisfactiontothetenants。"’

Mr。BeetonwithdrewandleftDicktohimself。Torpenhowhadbeenlongaway；therewasnomoreriotinginthechambers，andDickhadsettleddowntohisnewlife，whichhewasweakenoughtoconsidernothingbetterthandeath。

Itishardtolivealoneinthedark，confusingthedayandnight；droppingtosleepthroughsheerwearinessatmid—day，andrisingrestlessinthechillofthedawn。AtfirstDick，onhisawakenings，wouldgropealongthecorridorsofthechamberstillheheardsomeonesnore。Thenhewouldknowthatthedayhadnotyetcome，andreturnwearilytohisbedroom。

LaterhelearnednottostirtilltherewasanoiseandmovementinthehouseandMr。Beetonadvisedhimtogetup。Oncedressed——anddressing，nowthatTorpenhowwasaway，wasalengthybusiness，becausecollars，ties，andthelikehidthemselvesinfarcornersoftheroom，andsearchmeanthead—beatingagainstchairsandtrunks——oncedressed，therewasnothingwhatevertodoexcepttositstillandbroodtillthethreedailymealscame。Centuriesseparatedbreakfastfromlunchandlunchfromdinner，andthoughamanprayedforhundredsofyearsthathismindmightbetakenfromhim，Godwouldneverhear。Ratherthemindwasquickenedandtherevolvingthoughtsgroundagainsteachotherasmillstonesgrindwhenthereisnocornbetween；andyetthebrainwouldnotwearoutandgivehimrest。Itcontinuedtothink，atlength，withimageryandallmannerofreminiscences。ItrecalledMaisieandpastsuccess，recklesstravelsbylandandsea，thegloryofdoingworkandfeelingthatitwasgood，andsuggestedallthatmighthavehappenedhadtheeyesonlybeenfaithfultotheirduty。Whenthinkingceasedthroughsheerweariness，therepouredintoDick’ssoultideontideofoverwhelming，purposelessfear——dreadofstarvationalways，terrorlesttheunseenceilingshouldcrushdownuponhim，fearoffireinthechambersandalouse’sdeathinredflame，andagoniesoffiercerhorrorthathadnothingtodowithanyfearofdeath。ThenDickbowedhishead，andclutchingthearmsofhischairfoughtwithhissweatingselftillthetinkleofplatestoldhimthatsomethingtoeatwasbeingsetbeforehim。

Mr。Beetonwouldbringthemealwhenhehadtimetospare，andDicklearnedtohanguponhisspeech，whichdealtwithbadlyfittedgas—plugs，waste—pipesoutofrepair，littletricksfordrivingpicture—nailsintowalls，andthesinsofthecharwomanorthehousemaids。Inthelackofbetterthingsthesmallgossipofaservant’’hallbecomesimmenselyinteresting，andthescrewingofawasheronatapaneventtobetalkedoverfordays。

Onceortwiceaweek，too，Mr。BeetonwouldtakeDickoutwithhimwhenhewentmarketinginthemorningtohagglewithtradesmenoverfish，lamp—wicks，mustard，tapioca，andsoforth，whileDickrestedhisweightfirstononefootandthenontheotherandplayedaimlesslywiththetinsandstring—ballonthecounter。ThentheywouldperhapsmeetoneofMr。Beeton’sfriends，andDick，standingasidealittle，wouldholdhispeacetillMr。Beetonwaswillingtogoonagain。

Thelifedidnotincreasehisself—respect。Heabandonedshavingasadangerousexercise，andbeingshavedinabarber’sshopmeantexposureofhisinfirmity。Hecouldnotseethathisclotheswereproperlybrushed，andsincehehadnevertakenanycareofhispersonalappearancehebecameeveryknownvarietyofsloven。Ablindmancannotdealwithcleanlinesstillhehasbeensomemonthsusedtothedarkness。Ifhedemandattendanceandgrowangryatthewantofit，hemustasserthimselfandstandupright。Thenthemeanestmenialcanseethatheisblindand，therefore，ofnoconsequence。Awisemanwillkeephiseyesonthefloorandsitstill。Foramusementhemaypickcoallumpbylumpoutofthescuttlewiththetongsandpileitinalittleheapinthefender，keepingcountofthelumps，whichmustallbeputbackagain，onebyoneandverycarefully。Hemaysethimselfsumsifhecarestoworkthemout；hemaytalktohimselfortothecatifshechoosestovisithim；andifhistradehasbeenthatofanartist，hemaysketchintheairwithhisforefinger；butthatistoomuchlikedrawingapigwiththeeyesshut。Hemaygotohisbookshelvesandcounthisbooks，rangingtheminorderoftheirsize；ortohiswardrobeandcounthisshirts，layingtheminpilesoftwoorthreeonthebed，astheysufferfromfrayedcuffsorlostbuttons。

Eventhisentertainmentweariesafteratime；andallthetimesarevery，verylong。

Dickwasallowedtosortatool—chestwhereMr。Beetonkepthammers，tapsandnuts，lengthsofgas—pipes，oil—bottles，andstring。

’IfIdon’thaveeverythingjustwhereIknowwheretolookforit，why，then，Ican’tfindanythingwhenIdowantit。You’venoidea，sir，theamountoflittlethingsthatthesechambersusesup，’saidMr。Beeton。

Fumblingatthehandleofthedoorashewentout：’It’shardonyou，sir，Idothinkit’shardonyou。Ain’tyougoingtodoanything，sir？’

’I’llpaymyrentandmessing。Isn’tthatenough？’

’Iwasn’tdoubtingforamomentthatyoucouldn’tpayyourway，sir；butI’aveoftensaidtomywife，"It’s’ardon’imbecauseitisn’tasifhewasanoldman，noryetamiddle—agedone，butquiteayounggentleman。

That’swhereitcomesso’ard。"’

’Isupposeso，’saidDick，absently。Thisparticularnervethroughlongbatteringhadceasedtofeel——much。

’Iwasthinking，’continuedMr。Beeton，stillmakingasiftogo，’thatyoumightliketohearmyboyAlfreadyouthepaperssometimesofanevening。Hedoreadbeautiful，seeinghe’sonlynine。’

’Ishouldbeverygrateful，’saidDick。’Onlyletmemakeitworthhiswhile。’

’Wewasn’tthinkingofthat，sir，butofcourseit’sinyourown’ands；butonlyto’earAlfsing"ABoy’sbestFriendis’isMother！"Ah！’

’I’llhearhimsingthattoo。Lethimcomethiseveningwiththenewspapers。’

Alfwasnotanicechild，beingpuffedupwithmanyschool—boardcertificatesforgoodconduct，andinordinatelyproudofhissinging。Mr。

Beetonremained，beaming，whilethechildwailedhiswaythroughasongofsomeeighteight—lineversesintheusualwhineofayoungCockney，and，aftercompliments，lefthimtoreadDicktheforeigntelegrams。TenminuteslaterAlfreturnedtohisparentsratherpaleandscared。

’’Esaid’ecouldn’tstanditnomore，’heexplained。

’Heneversaidyoureadbadly，Alf？’Mrs。Beetonspoke。

’No。’EsaidIreadbeautiful。Said’enever’eardanyonereadlikethat，but’esaid’ecouldn’tabidethestuffinthepapers。’

’P’rapshe’slostsomemoneyintheStocks。Wereyoureadin’himaboutStocks，Alf？’

’No；itwasallaboutfightin’outtherewherethesoldiersisgone——agreatlongpiecewithallthelinesclosetogetherandveryhardwordsinit。’E

giveme’arfacrownbecauseIreadsowell。And’esaysthenexttimethere’sanything’ewantsread’e’llsendforme。’

’That’sgoodhearing，butIdothinkforallthehalf—crown——putitintothekicking—donkeymoney—box，Alf，andletmeseeyoudoit——hemighthavekeptyoulonger。Why，hecouldn’thavebeguntounderstandhowbeautifulyouread。’

’He’sbestlefttohisself——gentlemenalwaysarewhenthey’redownhearted，’saidMr。Beeton。

Alf’srigorouslylimitedpowersofcomprehendingTorpenhow’sspecialcorrespondencehadwakedthedevilofunrestinDick。Hecouldhear，throughtheboy’snasalchant，thecamelsgruntinginthesquaresbehindthesoldiersoutsideSuakin；couldhearthemenswearingandchaffingacrossthecookingpots，andcouldsmelltheacridwood—smokeasitdriftedovercampbeforethewindofthedesert。

ThatnightheprayedtoGodthathismindmightbetakenfromhim，offeringforproofthathewasworthyofthisfavourthefactthathehadnotshothimselflongago。Thatprayerwasnotanswered，andindeedDickknewinhisheartofheartsthatonlyalingeringsenseofhumourandnospecialvirtuehadkepthimalive。Suicide，hehadpersuadedhimself，wouldbealudicrousinsulttothegravityofthesituationaswellasaweak—kneedconfessionoffear。

’Justforthefunofthething，’hesaidtothecat，whohadtakenBinkie’splaceinhisestablishment，’Ishouldliketoknowhowlongthisisgoingtolast。IcanliveforayearonthehundredpoundsTorpcashedforme。I

musthavetwoorthreethousandatleastintheBank——twentyorthirtyyearsmoreprovidedfor，thatistosay。ThenIfallbackonmyhundredandtwentyayear，whichwillbemorebythattime。Let’sconsider。

Twenty—five——thirty—five——aman’sinhisprimethen，theysay——forty—five——amiddle—agedmanjustenteringpolitics——fifty—five——"diedatthecomparativelyearlyageoffifty—five，"accordingtothenewspapers。Bah！HowtheseChristiansfunkdeath！Sixty—five——we’reonlygettingoninyears。Seventy—fiveisjustpossible，though。Greathell，catO！fiftyyearsmoreofsolitaryconfinementinthedark！You’lldie，andBeetonwilldie，andTorpwilldie，andMai——everybodyelsewilldie，butIshallbealiveandkickingwithnothingtodo。I’mverysorryformyself。Ishouldlikesomeoneelsetobesorryforme。EvidentlyI’mnotgoingmabeforeIdie，butthepain’sjustasbadasever。Somedaywhenyou’revivisected，catO！they’lltieyoudownonalittletableandcutyouopen——butdon’tbeafraid；they’lltakepreciousgoodcarethatyoudon’tdie。You’lllive，andyou’llbeverysorrythenthatyouweren’tsorryforme。PerhapsTorpwillcomebackor……IwishIcouldgotoTorpandtheNilghai，eventhoughIwereintheirway。’

Pussylefttheroombeforethespeechwasended，andAlf，asheentered，foundDickaddressingtheemptyhearth—rug。

’There’saletterforyou，sir，’hesaid。’Perhapsyou’dlikemetoreadit。’

’LendittomeforaminuteandI’lltellyou。’

Theoutstretchedhandshookjustalittleandthevoicewasnotover—steady。Itwaswithinthelimitsofhumanpossibilitythat——thatwasnoletterfromMaisie。Heknewtheheftofthreeclosedenvelopesonlytoowell。Itwasafoolishhopethatthegirlshouldwritetohim，forhedidnotrealisethatthereisawrongwhichadmitsofnoreparationthoughtheevildoermaywithtearsandtheheart’sbestlovestrivetomendall。Itisbesttoforgetthatwrongwhetheritbecausedorendured，sinceitisasremedilessasbadworkonceputforward。

’Readit，then，’saidDick，andAlfbeganintoningaccordingtotherulesoftheBoardSchool——

’"Icouldhavegivenyoulove，Icouldhavegivenyouloyalty，suchasyouneverdreamedof。DoyousupposeIcaredwhatyouwere？Butyouchosetowhistleeverythingdownthewindfornothing。Myonlyexcuseforyouisthatyouaresoyoung。"

’That’sall，’hesaid，returningthepapertobedroppedintothefire。

’Whatwasintheletter？’askedMrs。Beeton，whenAlfreturned。

’Idon’tknow。Ithinkitwasacircularoratractaboutnotwhistlin’ateverythingwhenyou’reyoung。’

’ImusthavesteppedonsomethingwhenIwasaliveandwalkingaboutandithasbouncedupandhitme。Godhelpit，whateveritis——unlessitwasallajoke。ButIdon’tknowanyonewho’dtakethetroubletoplayajokeonme……Loveandloyaltyfornothing。Itsoundstemptingenough。

IwonderwhetherIhavelostanythingreally？’

Dickconsideredforalongtimebutcouldnotrememberwhenorhowhehadputhimselfinthewayofwinningthesetriflesatawoman’shands。

Still，theletterastouchingonmattersthathepreferrednottothinkaboutstunghimintoafitoffrenzythatlastedforadayandnight。Whenhisheartwassofullofdespairthatitwouldholdnomore，bodyandsoultogetherseemedtobedroppingwithoutcheckthroughthedarkness。

Thencamefearofdarknessanddesperateattemptstoreachthelightagain。Buttherewasnolighttobereached。Whenthatagonyhadlefthimsweatingandbreathless，thedownwardflightwouldrecommencetillthegatheringtortureofitspurredhimintoanotherfightashopelessasthefirst。Followedsomefewminutesofsleepinwhichhedreamedthathesaw。ThentheprocessionofeventswouldrepeatitselftillhewasutterlywornoutandthebraintookupitseverlastingconsiderationofMaisieandmight—have—beens。

AttheendofeverythingMr。Beetoncametohisroomandvolunteeredtotakehimout。’Notmarketingthistime，butwe’llgointotheParksifyoulike。’

’BedamnedifIdo，’quothDick。’Keeptothestreetsandwalkupanddown。Iliketohearthepeopleroundme。’

Thiswasnotaltogethertrue。Theblindinthefirststagesoftheirinfirmitydislikethosewhocanmovewithafreestrideandunliftedarms——butDickhadnoearthlydesiretogototheParks。OnceandonlyoncesinceMaisiehadshutherdoorhehadgonethereunderAlf’scharge。AlfforgothimandfishedforminnowsintheSerpentinewithsomecompanions。Afterhalfanhour’swaitingDick，almostweepingwithrageandwrath，caughtapasser—by，whointroducedhimtoafriendlypoliceman，wholedhimtoafour—wheeleroppositetheAlbertHall。HenevertoldMr。BeetonofAlf’sforgetfulness，but……thiswasnotthemannerinwhichhewasusedtowalktheParksaforetime。

’Whatstreetswouldyouliketowalkdown，then？’saidMr。Beeton，sympathetically。HisownideasofariotousholidaymeantpicnickingonthegrassofGreenParkwithhisfamily，andhalfadozenpaperbagsfulloffood。

’Keeptotheriver，’saidDick，andtheykepttotheriver，andtherushofitwasinhisearstilltheycametoBlackfriarsBridgeandstruckthenceontotheWaterlooRoad，Mr。Beetonexplainingthebeautiesofthesceneryashewenton。

’Andwalkingontheothersideofthepavement，’saidhe，’unlessI’mmuchmistaken，istheyoungwomanthatusedtocometoyourroomstobedrawed。IneverforgetsafaceandIneverremembersaname，exceptpayingtenants，o’course！’

’Stopher，’saidDick。’It’sBessieBroke。TellherI’dliketospeaktoheragain。Quick，man！’

Mr。BeetoncrossedtheroadunderthenosesoftheomnibusesandarrestedBessiethenonherwaynorthward。SherecognisedhimasthemaninauthoritywhousedtoglareatherwhenshepassedupDick’sstaircase，andherfirstimpulsewastorun。

’Wasn’tyouMr。Heldar’smodel？’saidMr。Beeton，plantinghimselfinfrontofher。’Youwas。He’sontheothersideoftheroadandhe’dliketoseeyou。’

’Why？’saidBessie，faintly。Sheremembered——indeedhadneverforlongforgotten——anaffairconnectedwithanewlyfinishedpicture。

’Becausehehasaskedmetodoso，andbecausehe’smostparticularblind。’

’Drunk？’

’No。’Orspitalblind。Hecan’tsee。That’shimoverthere。’

DickwasleaningagainsttheparapetofthebridgeasMr。Beetonpointedhimout——astub—bearded，bowedcreaturewearingadirtymagenta—colouredneckclothoutsideanunbrushedcoat。Therewasnothingtofearfromsuchanone。Evenifhechasedher，Bessiethought，hecouldnotfollowfar。Shecrossedover，andDick’sfacelightedup。Itwaslongsinceawomanofanykindhadtakenthetroubletospeaktohim。

’Ihopeyou’rewell，Mr。Heldar？’saidBessie，alittlepuzzled。Mr。Beetonstoodbywiththeairofanambassadorandbreathedresponsibly。

’I’mverywellindeed，and，byJove！I’mgladtosee——hearyou，Imean，Bess。Youneverthoughtitworthwhiletoturnupandseeusagainafteryougotyourmoney。Idon’tknowwhyyoushould。Areyougoinganywhereinparticularjustnow？’

’Iwasgoingforawalk，’saidBessie。

’Nottheoldbusiness？’Dickspokeunderhisbreath。

’Lor，no！Ipaidmypremium’——Bessiewasveryproudofthatword——’forabarmaid，sleepingin，andI’matthebarnowquiterespectable。IndeedI

am。’

Mr。Beetonhadnospecialreasontobelieveintheloftinessofhumannature。Thereforehedissolvedhimselflikeamistandreturnedtohisgas—plugswithoutawordofapology。Bessiewatchedtheflightwithacertainuneasiness；butsolongasDickappearedtobeignorantoftheharmthathadbeendonetohim……

’It’shardworkpullingthebeer—handles，’shewenton，’andthey’vegotoneofthempenny—in—the—slotcash—machines，soifyougetwrongbyapennyattheendoftheday——butthenIdon’tbelievethemachineryisright。Doyou？’

’I’veonlyseenitwork。Mr。Beeton。’

’He’sgone。

’I’mafraidImustaskyoutohelpmehome，then。I’llmakeitworthyourwhile。Yousee。’ThesightlesseyesturnedtowardsherandBessiesaw。

’Itisn’ttakingyououtofyourway？’hesaidhesitatingly。’Icanaskapolicemanifitis。’

’Notatall。IcomeonatsevenandI’moffatfour。That’seasyhours。’

’GoodGod！——butI’monallthetime。IwishIhadsomeworktodotoo。

Let’sgohome，Bess。’

Heturnedandcannonedintoamanonthesidewalk，recoilingwithanoath。Bessietookhisarmandsaidnothing——asshehadsaidnothingwhenhehadorderedhertoturnherfacealittlemoretothelight。Theywalkedforsometimeinsilence，thegirlsteeringhimdeftlythroughthecrowd。

’Andwhere’s——where’sMr。Torpenhow？’sheinquiredatlast。

’Hehasgoneawaytothedesert。’

’Where’sthat？’

Dickpointedtotheright。’East——outofthemouthoftheriver，’saidhe。

’Thenwest，thensouth，andtheneastagain，allalongtheunder—sideofEurope。Thensouthagain，Godknowshowfar。’TheexplanationdidnotenlightenBessieintheleast，butsheheldhertongueandlookedtoDick’spatchtilltheycametothechambers。

’We’llhaveteaandmuffins，’hesaidjoyously。’Ican’ttellyou，Bessie，howgladIamtofindyouagain。Whatmadeyougoawaysosuddenly？’

’Ididn’tthinkyou’dwantmeanymore，’shesaid，emboldenedbyhisignorance。

’Ididn’t，asamatteroffact——butafterwards——AtanyrateI’mgladyou’vecome。Youknowthestairs。’

SoBessieledhimhometohisownplace——therewasnoonetohinder——andshutthedoorofthestudio。

’Whatamess！’washerfirstword。’Allthesethingshaven’tbeenlookedafterformonthsandmonths。’

’No，onlyweeks，Bess。Youcan’texpectthemtocare。’

’Idon’tknowwhatyouexpectthemtodo。Theyoughttoknowwhatyou’vepaidthemfor。Thedust’sjustawful。It’sallovertheeasel。’

’Idon’tuseitmuchnow。’

’Alloverthepicturesandthefloor，andalloveryourcoat。I’dliketospeaktothemhousemaids。’

’Ringfortea，then。’Dickfelthiswaytotheonechairheusedbycustom。

Bessiesawtheactionand，asfarasinherlay，wastouched。Butthereremainedalwaysakeensenseofnew—foundsuperiority，anditwasinhervoicewhenshespoke。

’Howlonghaveyoubeenlikethis？’shesaidwrathfully，asthoughtheblindnessweresomefaultofthehousemaids。

’How？’

’Asyouare。’

’Thedayafteryouwentawaywiththecheck，almostassoonasmypicturewasfinished；Ihardlysawheralive。’

’Thenthey’vebeencheatingyoueversince，that’sall。Iknowtheirnicelittleways。’

Awomanmayloveonemananddespiseanother，butongeneralfeminineprinciplesshewilldoherbesttosavethemanshedespisesfrombeingdefrauded。Herlovedonecanlooktohimself，buttheotherman，beingobviouslyanidiot，needsprotection。

’Idon’tthinkMr。Beetoncheatsmuch，’saidDick。Bessiewasflouncingupanddowntheroom，andhewasconsciousofakeensenseofenjoymentasheheardtheswishofherskirtsandthelightstepbetween。

’Teaandmuffins，’shesaidshortly，whentheringatthebellwasanswered；’twoteaspoonfulsandoneoverforthepot。Idon’twanttheoldteapotthatwasherewhenIusedtocome。Itdon’tdraw。Getanother。’

Thehousemaidwentawayscandalised，andDickchuckled。ThenhebegantocoughasBessiebangedupanddownthestudiodisturbingthedust。

’Whatareyoutryingtodo？’

’Putthingsstraight。Thisislikeunfurnishedlodgings。Howcouldyouletitgoso？’

’HowcouldIhelpit？Dustaway。’

Shedustedfuriously，andinthemidstofallthepotherenteredMrs。

Beeton。Herhusbandonhisreturnhadexplainedthesituation，windingupwiththepeculiarlyfelicitousproverb，’Dountoothersasyouwouldbedoneby。’Shehaddescendedtoputintoherplacethepersonwhodemandedmuffinsandanuncrackedteapotasthoughshehadarighttoboth。

’Muffinsreadyyet？’saidBess，stilldusting。Shewasnolongeradrabofthestreetsbutayoungladywho，thankstoDick’scheck，hadpaidherpremiumandwasentitledtopullbeer—handleswiththebest。BeingneatlydressedinblackshedidnothesitatetofaceMrs。Beeton，andtherepassedbetweenthetwowomencertainregardsthatDickwouldhaveappreciated。Thesituationadjusteditselfbyeye。Bessiehadwon，andMrs。Beetonreturnedtocookmuffinsandmakescathingremarksaboutmodels，hussies，trollops，andthelike，toherhusband。

’There’snothingtobegotofinterferingwithhim，Liza，’hesaid。’Alf，yougoalongintothestreettoplay。Whenheisn’tcrossedhe’saskindlyaskind，butwhenhe’scrossedhe’sthedevilandall。Wetooktoomanylittlethingsoutofhisroomssincehewasblindtobethatparticularaboutwhathedoes。Theyain’tnoobjectstoablindman，ofcourse，butifitwastocomeintocourtwe’dgetthesack。Yes，IdidintroducehimtothatgirlbecauseI’mafeelin’manmyself。’

’Muchtoofeelin’！’Mrs。Beetonslappedthemuffinsintothedish，andthoughtofcomelyhousemaidslongsincedismissedonsuspicion。

’Iain’tashamedofit，anditisn’tforustojudgehimhardsolongashepaysquietandregularashedo。Iknowhowtomanageyounggentlemen，youknowhowtocookforthem，andwhatIsaysis，leteachsticktohisownbusinessandthentherewon’tbeanytrouble。Takethemmuffinsdown，Liza，andbesureyouhavenowordswiththatyoungwoman。Hislotiscruelhard，andifhe’scrossedhedoswearworsethananyoneI’veeverserved。’

’That’salittlebetter，’saidBessie，sittingdowntothetea。’Youneedn’twait，thankyou，Mrs。Beeton。’

’Ihadnointentionofdoingsuch，Idoassureyou。’

Bessiemadenoanswerwhatever。This，sheknew，wasthewayinwhichrealladiesroutedtheirfoes，andwhenoneisabarmaidatafirst—classpublic—houseonemaybecomearealladyattenminutes’notice。

HereyesfellonDickoppositeherandshewasbothshockedanddispleased。Thereweredroppingsoffoodalldownthefrontofhiscoat；

themouthundertheraggedill—grownbearddroopedsullenly；theforeheadwaslinedandcontracted；andontheleantemplesthehairwasadustyindeterminatecolourthatmightormightnothavebeencalledgray。Theuttermiseryandself—abandonmentofthemanappealedtoher，andatthebottomofherheartlaythewickedfeelingthathewashumbledandbroughtlowwhohadoncehumbledher。

’Oh！itisgoodtohearyoumovingabout，’saidDick，rubbinghishands。

’Tellusallaboutyourbarsuccesses，Bessie，andthewayyoulivenow。’

’Nevermindthat。I’mquiterespectable，asyou’dseebylookingatme。

Youdon’tseemtolivetoowell。Whatmadeyougoblindthatsudden？

Whyisn’tthereanyonetolookafteryou？’

Dickwastoothankfulforthesoundofhervoicetoresentthetoneofit。

’Iwascutacrosstheheadalongtimeago，andthatruinedmyeyes。I

don’tsupposeanybodythinksitworthwhiletolookaftermeanymore。

Whyshouldthey？——andMr。BeetonreallydoeseverythingIwant。’

’Don’tyouknowanygentlemenandladies，then，whileyouwas——well？’

’Afew，butIdon’tcaretohavethemlookingatme。’

’Isupposethat’swhyyou’vegrowedabeard。Takeitoff，itdon’tbecomeyou。’

’Goodgracious，child，doyouimaginethatIthinkofwhatbecomesofmethesedays？’

’Youought。GetthattakenoffbeforeIcomehereagain。IsupposeIcancome，can’tI？’

’I’dbeonlytoogratefulifyoudid。Idon’tthinkItreatedyouverywellintheolddays。Iusedtomakeyouangry。’

’Veryangry，youdid。’

’I’msorryforit，then。Comeandseemewhenyoucanandasoftenasyoucan。Godknows，thereisn’tasoulintheworldtotakethattroubleexceptyouandMr。Beeton。’

’Alotoftroublehe’stakingandshetoo。’Thiswithatossofthehead。

’They’veletyoudoanyhowandtheyhaven’tdoneanythingforyou。I’veonlytolookandseethatmuch。I’llcome，andI’llbegladtocome，butyoumustgoandbeshaved，andyoumustgetsomeotherclothes——thoseonesaren’tfittobeseen。’

’Ihaveheapssomewhere，’hesaidhelplessly。

’Iknowyouhave。TellMr。BeetontogiveyouanewsuitandI’llbrushitandkeepitclean。Youmaybeasblindasabarn—door，Mr。Heldar，butitdoesn’texcuseyoulookinglikeasweep。’

’DoIlooklikeasweep，then？’

’Oh，I’msorryforyou。I’mthatsorryforyou！’shecriedimpulsively，andtookDick’shands。Mechanically，heloweredhisheadasiftokiss——shewastheonlywomanwhohadtakenpityonhim，andhewasnottooproudforalittlepitynow。Shestooduptogo。

’Nothingo’thatkindtillyoulookmorelikeagentleman。It’squiteeasywhenyougetshaved，andsomeclothes。’

Hecouldhearherdrawingonherglovesandrosetosaygood—bye。Shepassedbehindhim，kissedhimaudaciouslyonthebackoftheneck，andranawayasswiftlyasonthedaywhenshehaddestroyedtheMelancolia。

’TothinkofmekissingMr。Heldar，’shesaidtoherself，’afterallhe’sdonetomeandall！Well，I’msorryforhim，andifhewasshavedhewouldn’tbesobadtolookat，but……OhthemBeetons，howshamefulthey’vetreatedhim！IknowBeeton’swearinghisshirtonhisbackto—dayjustaswellasifI’dairedit。To—morrow，I’llsee……Iwonderifhehasmuchofhisown。Itmightbeworthmorethanthebar——Iwouldn’thavetodoanywork——andjustasrespectableasifnooneknew。’

DickwasnotgratefultoBessieforherpartinggift。Hewasacutelyconsciousofitinthenapeofhisneckthroughoutthenight，butitseemed，amongverymanyotherthings，toenforcethewisdomofgettingshaved。

Hewasshavedaccordinglyinthemorning，andfeltthebetterforit。A

freshsuitofclothes，whitelinen，andtheknowledgethatsomeoneintheworldsaidthatshetookaninterestinhispersonalappearancemadehimcarryhimselfalmostupright；forthebrainwasrelievedforawhilefromthinkingofMaisie，who，underothercircumstances，mighthavegiventhatkissandamillionothers。

’Letusconsider，’saidhe，afterlunch。’Thegirlcan’tcare，andit’satoss—upwhethershecomesagainornot，butifmoneycanbuyhertolookaftermesheshallbebought。Nobodyelseintheworldwouldtakethetrouble，andIcanmakeitworthherwhile。She’sachildofthegutterholdingbrevetrankasabarmaid；sosheshallhaveeverythingshewantsifshe’llonlycomeandtalkandlookafterme。’Herubbedhisnewlyshornchinandbegantoperplexhimselfwiththethoughtofhernotcoming。’IsupposeIdidlookratherasweep，’hewenton。’Ihadnoreasontolookotherwise。Iknewthingsdroppedonmyclothes，butitdidn’tmatter。Itwouldbecruelifshedidn’tcome。Shemust。Maisiecameonce，andthatwasenoughforher。Shewasquiteright。Shehadsomethingtoworkfor。Thiscreaturehasonlybeer—handlestopull，unlessshehasdeludedsomeyoungmanintokeepingcompanywithher。

Fancybeingcheatedforthesakeofacounter—jumper！We’refallingprettylow。’

Somethingcriedaloudwithinhim：——Thiswillhurtmorethananythingthathasgonebefore。Itwillrecallandremindandsuggestandtantalise，andintheenddriveyoumad。

’Iknowit，Iknowit！’Dickcried，clenchinghishandsdespairingly；’but，goodheavens！isapoorblindbeggarnevertogetanythingoutofhislifeexceptthreemealsadayandagreasywaistcoat？Iwishshe’dcome。’

Earlyintheafternoontimeshecame，becausetherewasnoyoungmaninherlifejustthen，andshethoughtofmaterialadvantageswhichwouldallowhertobeidlefortherestofherdays。

’Ishouldn’thaveknownyou，’shesaidapprovingly。’Youlookasyouusedtolook——agentlemanthatwasproudofhimself。’

’Don’tyouthinkIdeserveanotherkiss，then？’saidDick，flushingalittle。

’Maybe——butyouwon’tgetityet。Sitdownandlet’sseewhatIcandoforyou。I’mcertainsureMr。Beetoncheatsyou，nowthatyoucan’tgothroughthehousekeepingbookseverymonth。Isn’tthattrue？’

’You’dbettercomeandhousekeepformethen，Bessie。’

’Couldn’tdoitinthesechambers——youknowthataswellasIdo。’

’Iknow，butwemightgosomewhereelse，ifyouthoughtitworthyourwhile。’

’I’dtrytolookafteryou，anyhow；butIshouldn’tcaretohavetoworkforbothofus。’Thiswastentative。

Dicklaughed。